it's all your fault ;
kagamine rin
When she opened her eyes, she didn't know what to expect.
Rin woke up with tears blurring her vision, and in an instant, the girl threw her sheets away from her body, sending them flying across the room as she ran out of it.
She ran towards her brother's room, tossing the door open, only to reveal nothing.
Rin only smiles a little, tears filling the corners of her azure eyes.
He isn't going to be there, you idiot. How could you forget? Your brother is dead.
In the dull atmosphere of her deceased brother's bedroom, Rin stood there for a moment, baby blue eyes gently caressing the naked walls. The sight of his empty, messy bed caused her to shiver a little while she held her trembling hands close to her heart.
The only hoarse words that had come out of her were: "Morning." Before she began to sob.
Tears crept from the corners of her blue eyes, and her chest heaved with an unbearable pain piercing her shattering heart. Why did it come to this? How did it come to this? If she had gone there on time...If she was nice to Miku from the start...Hell...If the two had never crossed paths...
Would she still be alive?
If she wasn't such a fucking asshole would Miku still be alive? Would Len still be alive?
It's all your fault because you were such a fucking bitch. Their asses would still be alive if you weren't such a fucking bitch. The words painfully throbbed in her head.
They're dead. And it's all your fault.
While her blood pounded thuddingly in her veins out of anger, she stomped out of Len's bedroom, uncontrollably sobbing and profanely cursing. After she had made her way to the kitchen, her slender arms reached out for fragile plates and delicate cups, and she could not help throwing them across the room, leading to a further fume-filled atmosphere.
"Fuck yourself! You deserve to be DEAD!" Rin hoarsely yelled, "After all the goddamn FUCKING PAIN you caused to EVERYONE, you deserve to FUCKING ROT!" The girl threw an ivory plate onto the floor, the shattering sound of it ringing in her pulsing eardrums as it broke into tiny pieces.
Soaring in random directions, the fragments of the smashed plate flew, hoping that they will go their separate ways, living in the ignorance that some of them would lose their way in life.
"Just fucking die, damnit.." Rin whispers, tears oozing out of her eyes as her body fell, knees scraping against the surface of the freezing cold floor. She pounded her throbbing fists against the floor as she sobbed, angrily screaming in utter pain and agony. "DIE! JUST DIE!"
Her ears perked up in an instant once she had heard keys jingling from a few feet away, and she heard the living room door click. The poor door was violently pushed open to reveal a certain furious brunette, pearl white teeth tugging at the bottom of her crimsoned lip.
The angry woman was in her casual white t-shirt and comfy pajama shorts, complemented with some black flip-flops that squeaked a little as she strutted towards the kitchen, mumbling inaudible words under her breath.
When Rin had made eye contact with the brunette, fear showered over her body as Meiko took in the ugly scene in the beaten-up kitchen.
The woman's eyes went wide, and her teeth had bitten her entire bottom lip. A fuming shade of a startling red grew onto her pale face, and as it did so, she let out a frustrated sigh and began to pinch her nose bridge in between her fingers. Holy heck was Meiko pissed off.
"Jesus fucking.." Meiko hisses, running a hand through her messed-up hair as she does so. "Get a hold of yourself, goddamnit. I could hear you all the way from the second floor, Rin. What the hell happened here? It's seven in the fucking morning, Christ."
Rin didn't respond.
"So? You aren't gonna tell me why the hell you're on the floor, and why there are plates and cups shattered everywhere?" Meiko crosses her arms as she leans against the wall, gritting her teeth.
"...It's my fault." Rin whispers, not the loudest whisper.
"What?"
"It's all my fault, Meiko!" The blonde snivels, "It's all my fault that they're DEAD!"
The blonde's words took Meiko by surprise. After a swift, yet careful walk across the broken plates and shattered cups, the woman approached the sobbing female and wrapped her arms around her gently, soothing her in a motherly way.
"It is not your fault, Rin." Meiko's own voice was beginning to shake as she heard her own words. "Nothing is your fault. You didn't know what was going on inside Len's head, or Miku's. Don't blame yourself for their deaths; it's not your fault, Rin." Her voice was getting weaker as she continued, "It's not your fault."
Upon pulling back from the warm embrace, she gave the girl a kiss on the forehead. As she firmly squeezes Rin's shoulders, tears build in Meiko's eyes as she says, "Things happen, but they will never be your fault." Meiko says sternly yet shakily. "Do you understand?"
The blonde slowly nodded, hovering her thumb over her bottom lip which was coated with a bit of mucus. Meiko exhaustingly sighs as she pushes away some of the female's blonde bangs away from her sweat-drenched forehead. She hesitantly looked around the dull-looking kitchen, somber, tired eyes landing on the torn plates and cups.
"We should clean up," Meiko managed to weakly chuckle.
"I'm tired though," Rin replied monotonously, no emotion shown in her dying words.
"I know," Meiko caressed the blonde's hair, a single tear flowing down her cheek.
"I'm tired too."
[NOTE]
Second chapter? Already? Wow.
Anyway, I just want to say that...
If you lost/lose someone close to you, no, it isn't your fault. Don't blame yourself, please. It will never be your fault if someone passes away. Things such as death happen, and we sadly have to accept that.
Eventually, we're all going to lose someone, which...sucks. *sigh*
If you need to vent, feel free to send me a message! I don't mind at all, and I'm here to listen. You won't be judged.
Anyway, no more sad, have a great day/night wherever you are!
