At last!
Sorry all for the wait but I hope this new chapter is worth it.
Oh and just a side note I am never hiring Deadpool again. Ever.
Chapter 19
"Erm...Hunter?" Naruto asked nervously.
Fem-Hunter made a face like she'd just eaten something sour. "Uck. He's still around" she bobbed her head in Hunter's general direction, which just confused them all more because as far as they could tell there was no one there "but right now, I'm driving."
"And who are you? What's your cup si-I mean what do you want!?" Kakashi caught himself mid-sentence, tearing his eyes away from Fem-Hunter's chest.
She started pacing slowly, her expression thoughtful. "Hmm, who am I? 'Huntress' is kinda taken...Oh, I'll think of something later. But what do I want?" She gave them all a wide smile "That's easy. This girl just wants to have fun."
"ARRRGHHHH!" Hunter roared. "Enough, enough, ENOUGH! Give me my body back you harpy!" Fem-Hunter just gave him a bemused look. Enraged, Hunter attacked her but his flailing punches just went right through her. He quickly gave up and wandered off to sulk.
While all this was going on Yugito and Bee were quietly circling round behind her. Once they were in position they attacked, charging forward in a pincer formation. In one fluid motion Fem-Hunter flipped into a hand stand and delivered a spinning kick to Bee's face, sending him careening off left, then she leapt out of Yugito's way before counter-attacking. The remaining Cloud ninja suddenly found herself on the defensive as Fem-Hunter hit her with a barrage of kicks. Yugito jumped to avoid a sweep but faster than should have been possible, Fem-Hunter spun round and landed a kick on her left side. Yugito barely had time to register this before she was hit again on the right, sending her flying, then she was launched into the air by a powerful upper kick and finally sent smashing down to the ground by a final kick. Moments after Yugito hit the floor Fem-Hunter landed on her back. She stepped off the defeated ninja, then gave her one final kick to the head, knocking her out.
That just left Bee. The Cloud Jinchuriki dashed towards Fem-Hunter, his body surging with lightning chakra. His target turned and...did a sexy pose. The lightning vanished instantly and Bee stopped in his tracks staring at Fem-Hunter's chest. He was only a few feet away from her now and was completely unprepared for when she kicked his legs out from under him, then brought her heel crashing down onto his head.
While all his was going on Team Seven and their teacher had been watching from the side lines. Naruto and Kakashi were just staring open mouthed with heart shaped anime eyes at their new warrior goddess, while Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura tried to get them to focus.
Hunter was still there, pacing back and forth, looking vaguely amused "Well, someone didn't skip on leg day."
Kakashi finally came to his senses "You four, go back to the village and find Lady Tsunade. I'll keep him...er, her occupied." The genin nodded and ran back towards the village while their teacher started charging up a chidori in his hand. After a moment he dashed forwards, planning to hit Fem-Hunter with all his might but she stayed where she was and simply muttered 'reflect'.
Kakashi's chidori hit the magic shield. He had just enough time to see Fem-Hunter blow him a kiss before it exploded, flinging him back in the direction the genin had gone. Moments later he sailed over their heads, trailing anime love hearts, and then he crashed into a tree.
"Kakashi-sensei!" yelled Naruto.
"Don't stop idiot!" Sasuke ordered. "He'll be fine but we need to get back to the village NOW!"
Moments later the three arrived at the village outskirts and split up. By now the Leaf Village had become very used to Hunter and Tsunade had set up a warning system for when he returned. It wasn't long before word spread and soon most of the civilians were taking cover inside their homes while the elite ninjas (and team seven) gathered in the town centre. They were all standing in a circle, facing outwards and on the lookout for their enemy.
"Where is he?" Asuma wondered aloud.
"Apparently he's a she now or something, right?" Anko looked over at team seven who all nodded in confirmation.
"Technically he's some kind of energy creature so that makes him an 'it'." said Jirriya.
"Hey, that's offensive!"
Everyone spun round and leapt backwards. Fem-Hunter was standing right in the middle of their circle.
Tsunade looked over at Jirriya, signalling the start of the plan but he was too busy staring at Fem-Hunter, his eyes having turned into anime hearts. Tsunade instantly lost her temper and punched him so hard he went straight through a wall.
"I...regret ...nothing!" Jirriya's voice floated weakly from the damaged building.
With that out of the way she turned her attention back to Fem-Hunter, who was absent-mindedly stretching her legs. "Sheesh, you think they never seen a woman be...before...hmmm." while she'd been talking her hand had started moving back and forth like it wasn't under her control. Then the hand smacked her in the face. "Oww?! What the...hey wait!" All of a sudden a change started to spread across her body "Nononono I want more time...I neeeee...need MY BODY BACK!"her voice changed and then the transformation was complete.
Hunter was back.
Everyone just stood there not sure of what to say. Eventually Hunter broke the silence "Now I know that was weird but it's over now and lets never speak of this again."
"Gladly. First team! Charge!" Tsunade ordered. At once several Anbu ninjas jumped at Hunter as everyone else drew back. Hunter immediately used a stop spell to freeze the attackers, then Tsunade yelled out "Second team! Charge!" Several more ninjas including Guy and Asuma leapt at Hunter who once again used a stop spell, draining his power completely. "No more magic." said Tsunade triumphantly "Sealing team, GO!"
Four ninjas carrying large scrolls suddenly appeared in a square around Hunter. As one they unrolled the scrolls and started making hand signs. At once a seal appeared on the floor below Hunter, containing him in a wall of ethereal light.
"Ya think this will hold me!?" Hunter yelled as he thrust out his arms, hitting the sides of the seal and started channelling Dark energy, destabilising it. As soon as the seal fell he was hit in the face by Sasuke using a chidori, making him real back. Before he could counter attack he was slammed into by Tsunade herself, who proceeded to pummel him with all of her enhanced strength.
"Naruto! NOW!" she yelled as she hit Hunter again.
Naruto just looked confused "Ermm...'now' what?"
"HIT HIM WITH THE RASENGAN!" Tsunade roared and Hunter started fighting back.
Naruto summoned two shadow clones and started forming a Rasengan in his hand. Once it was ready he ran towards Hunter and Tsunade at full speed.
The Hokage jumped back, signalling to Kurenai and Inoichi who had been waiting at the edge of the battle. The two started making hand signs as Naruto closed in.
Hunter let Tsunade go and refocused on the immediate threat. He tried to counter with a Black Rasengan but for some reason he just reach out at Naruto's heart.
Everything went dark as Hunter thought to himself 'Oh snap.'
Moments later
Naruto was fairly used to not having a clue what was going on around him but this was just plain ridiculous. One second he'd been about to kick Hunter's butt, no he was alone in what looked like a hotel corridor with windows on one side, and doors on the other.
"Well, this is interesting."
Naruto practically jumped out of his skin. Okay, so apparently he wasn't alone. Kurenai, Inoichi Sasuke and Sakura were all there too, looking more of less as bewildered as he was.
"Hunter's mind. I was expecting something crazier." Kurenai continued.
"W-wait..Hunter's mind! Kureani-sensai, what's going on!?" Naruto looked like he was about to explode so the older kunoichi took a deep breath and started explaining.
"Alright everyone, by now you all know that Hunter is ridiculously powerful. He's manage to overcome every effort to trap him not through intelligence but by sheer brute force." Everyone nodded, each remembering their battles with Hunter in the past. "We can't beat him in the real world, so we've taken the battle to the mental world. By combining genjustsu with Inoichi's mind transfer jutsu, we've brought ourselves, and the three of you here to face Hunter and perhaps get some straight answers."
"Wait." Everyone looked at Sakura "I thought Hunter was immune to genjutsu?"
Kurenai nodded "Yes. Genjutsu works by interrupting the chakra flow to the brain, creating illusions so real the mind thinks they are. Hunter has no chakra network and possibly no physical brain either."
"That explains a lot." said Naruto.
"You however, do." Kurenai continued, looking at Naruto.
"I get it." Sasuke finally spoke. "You were hoping that Hunter would fuse with Naruto again. You cast your jutsu on him and used the connection between them to get to Hunter."
Naruto took a moment to process this, then he yelled out "You used me as BAIT!"
"Yes!" Kurenai and Inoich said together.
"So why us?" asked Sakura.
Inoichi rubbed the back of his head. "Well, I was trying to bring more people in but I guess they didn't make it. I've never used a mind transfer like this before."
"Regardless there should be enough of us to overpower Hunter's willpower if he shows up." Kurenai reassured them all. "Now let's get mo-"
She was interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing on a table right next to them. That had not been there a moment ago.
Before anyone could stop her Sakura picked to up "Hello?"
Out of the speaker came a loud death metal voice. "HELLO! I AM THE BLOOD MACHINE I WILL...KILL YOU AND YOU WON'T SCREAM YOU WILL...OFFER ME THE KNIFE YOU WILL...BEG ME TO TAKE YOUR LIFE!"
"What...who is this!" Sakura yelled back.
"WE'RE THE GODDESS OF DEATH!"
"That wasn't really an answer." said Sasuke.
"A GOD DEVOID OF HUMANITY!"
"It's not real." said Kurenai "Just put it down."
"SCALP HER AND I'LL FUCK HER IN THE HEAD AND CUM INSIDE HER BRAIN!"
"Now that's just plain disgusting."
"SKULL FUCCCKERRRR!"
Sakura slammed the phone down, ending the call.
"Well, that's promising." said Kurenai, dryly. "Now it's probably best if we touch as little as-"
She looked round and saw Naruto opening on of the hotel room doors.
"Naruto!"
"Sorry but..arrgh!" At his cry of surprise the other five ninjas ran over to Naruto. Inside the room as a very non-descript hotel room, single bed, one small window nothing else really. The only interesting thing the room contained was Hunter. He was just sitting there on the floor with what looked like a broken model of the world. He was trying to put it back together with glue but he was doing a very poor job, and getting more distressed by the second.
"Is...that Hunter?" Sakura asked.
"No." said Inoichi "It's just part of his mind."
The Not-Hunter looked up at them, holding up the half (badly) repaired model "Do you think I can fix it?" he asked despairingly. Then he went back to work.
Inoichi slowly closed the door. "Hmmm." He went to the next room and opened it, ignoring Kurenai's expression.
Inside the new room was another 'Hunter' who'd decorated the room with notes and pieces of paper all connected by red strings. He stopped what he was doing and looked at his five guests.
"Erm...hello?" Naruto began.
"LOOK" 'Hunter yelled out, surprising them all "at the picture. SEE the skull. The part of bone removed. The Masterace Frankenstein Radio Controls! The Brainthoughts Broadcasting Raidio. The Eyesight Television. The Frankenstein Earphone Raidio."
"What..." was all Sakura could manage before he continued ranting.
"Deadly assaults even in my yard! With knives! Even bricks and stones! Even deadly touch tabin or electric shock flashlights! Even remote electronically controlled around corners trajection of deadly touch tarantula spiders! Or even bloody murder 'accidents'-"
By now they'd all back out of the room and Inoichi was closing the door
"-to shut me up forever with a sneak undetectable extermin-"
Once the door was closed everyone just stood there for a moment, not sure of what to say
"I'm going to have a field day with all of this." muttered Inoichi.
Deciding not to open any more doors the group moved on. Occasionally Naruto would look out of the windows but all that was out there was some kind of dark city that was illuminated every now and them by a flash of lightning.
"Creepy." Naruto thought allowed, then he walked right into Sasuke. "Hum..Hey why are we stopping?...Oh." He looked further down the hall and saw it was very dilapidated. The lights were either broken or flickering rapidly and there was grim and dirt covering every surface.
The group pressed on regardless, eventually arriving at a final door. On it was a sign reading 'Do not enter.'
Kurenai reached forwards and cautiously opened it.
Behind the door was another door, only the sign on this one read 'Seriously, you don't want to go there'. Kurenai opened that door too, only to find another door reading 'Some things are best forgotten.' And behind that another door saying 'Last chance.' The next door was blank.
Kurenai was starting to get annoyed now. She threw the door open and found yet another door.
'Well, don't say you weren't warned.' The last door opened by itself.
The five ninjas stepped inside a room that was total black, no walls, floor or ceiling visible, just a long red carpet stretching out before them. Lining the sides were what looked like museum exhibits but they were so dimly lit no one could see what they were.
"Ha, okay this is too creepy, let's just head ba-" Sakura turned only to find the door had gone, replaced by never ending darkness. She gave a slightly broken laugh "Hahah...No door."
With no way back they proceeded. As they walked past the first exhibit light suddenly appeared above it showing a scene. It was Hunter, frozen in place like a statue, looking at three other frozen figures, but they were jet black, lacked any kind of facial features.
"I'm telling you I saw them!" Hunter's voice came out of nowhere, slightly distorted.
"Yeah right *bzztch*." Another voice, a boys but not someone any of them knew.
"You're just making excuses *curttzh*, and lame ones at that." Now a girls voice.
"Monster grabbing Crazy Herman right off the streets. Sounds like a bad creepy pasta." said another boy.
"They were real, and I'll prove it!" said Hunter, then the light went out.
"What was that?" asked a nervous Naruto.
"A memory." replied Inoichi. "A pretty badly degraded on at that."
As they continued more scenes came to life.
One with Hunter reaching out to a Shadow Heartless. "I knew you were real."
Another where he was surrounded by the four others again. He looked like he was aiming his hand at a set of glass bottles, set up on a wall. A Dark Bolt leapt from his hand and shattered the wall.
"WOAH!" yelled one of them.
Another was holding some kind of small device "Okay, I got that on video. That is AWESOME!"
"I...Have no idea what to say." said the girl.
"That's a first." Said the first boy.
"Hey! What's that supposed to-"
"Wait!" Hunter interrupted "Guy's there's more. You won't believe what I've found out!"
Another scene, this time it was just Hunter and one other figure.
"Alright" said the figure in an unfamiliar, aggressive voice "you know the drill. Everything in your pockets! Now!"
"Bitch please!" Hunter just blasted him in the leg with a Dark Bolt.
Instantly the other man started screaming as he started to crumble away "ARGGGGH! Stop! I'm sorry! I'm sorry just stop I don't wanna DIIIIEEEE!"
"Nonono, tha-that's not what I was trying to do! STOP! END! CANCAL! I-I don't know what to do!"
The other figure disappeared.
The next scene, just Hunter alone. "I can fix it. I can fix everything. Everywhere."
Next scene. Now Hunter was with two other blank figures. Both were very close to him, one cupping his cheak. Hunter himself looked...sick. Most of his hair had fallen out and his face looked thin and pale.
A concerned woman's voice began "Oh my god *fzzt* are you alright! You look so sick! *bzzt* call a doctor!"
The other figure had an equally worried man's voice "What happened, where have you been all these weeks son?...Son?"
BLAM
Hunter blasted them both with two Dark Bolts. The five of them froze, taken aback. As the two figures disintegrated Hunter said in a very low voice "I am not your son."
The second last scene now. Hunter was back with the three others. All his hair had gone now. His eyes had a yellow glow to them and his body looked withered.
"Your killing everything!" yelled the girl.
"I'm bringing order!" Hunter retorted.
"Can you even hear yourself!" said first boy "This isn't what you want, it's what THEY want! They're using you!"
"Don't bother man." said second boy "We all know this ends one way."
"Yeah." A dark aura appeared round Hunter "It does."
The final scene was different. It was just a woman with strange clothes, blue hair and the weirdest shaped sword anyone had ever seen. She looked tired but somehow still determined. Right behind her a massive claw reached out of the shadows in a slashing motion and behind that were two big red eyes.
"Huh? Where's Hunter in this one?" asked Naruto. Kurenai pointed at the claw and eyes. Team seven all gulped.
"I want to leave now." said Sakura.
As if on cue there was an almost ominous creaking sound as a new door right behind them opened.
"We're not going through that, are we?" asked Naruto.
"If you see another way out, let us know." Sasuke shot back.
The new room they were in was another hotel room, but larger than the others, it even had its own TV (that showed only static) and kitchen. Paradise compared to the last room.
And of course there was a Hunter here too, holding a cup of tea.
"Oh great." groaned Saskue "What's this one's gimmick, a butler?"
"Hello to you too Sasuke." said the 'Hunter'. "It is Sasuke, right. For a moment there I mistook you for your brother."
That pushed all of Sasuke's buttons at once. He was about to lunge forwards and attack but suddenly froze in place. "What!? I can't move!"
"This is my place." said 'Hunter' as he stirred the cup of tea in his hand. "I decide the rules here." He smiled, his mouth stretching from ear to ear revealing a mouth full of needle sharp teeth. He looked over at a now very frightened Naruto "Well, if it isn't Naruto. The Hero of the tale. Or are you the villan? It's so hard to tell who's who when one's two."
"Y-you're completely insane!" stammered Sakura.
"Ah yes Sakura. The useless one. Even Naruto has improved since leaving the academy. What have you done lately? Apart from being baggage." He looked over at Kurenai. "Kurenai! How are you? Feeling ok? Any stomach cramps? Dizzy spells? Cravings? And ..is that Inoichi now? Don't really know much about you. Guess you're just not that important in the scheme of things."
"Who are you!?" demanded Kurenai.
"I'm who they used to be." He took a sip of his tea "Hunter and Thorn. A monster play acting it's a man and an empty husk that thinks it can have its own life. They were once one person. Me."
"They...were both you?" Naruto repeated.
"More or less. Being forgotten has...warped me a little bit. But today is cause for celebration!"
"Celebration? For what?" asked Sakura.
'Hunter' cocked his head to one side. "Why my return of course. Becoming a Heartless really set me back but I can pick up right where I left off. I still remember enough to do a ...passable job."
Now it was Inoichi's turn to ask "What job?"
"Building an empire. A United Empire of Worlds." He took in their incredulous expressions. "It really is the only way. About a year ago he Heartless launched a massive invasion. They devoured entire worlds, including yours." He pointed at them, which resulted in even more confusion and incredulity. "But we all got luck and a Hero put everything back together. Well, almost everything. We got lucky but how long will that luck hold? The Worlds need unity. They need me."
Kurenai almost burst out laughing. "Well, you've got ambition but that's about it. You have no way out of here."
"Yes I do." Hunter pointed as the door they'd just come through "And you've left me with five such fine choices outside."
While team seven reacted with horror, Inoichi just smirked "Humph. Actually you're out of time." Hunter's smile dropped. "We knew the risks of coming here were grave so we took a precaution. We only had so much time in here before the connection is broken in the real world. And because time moves faster here than out there, they started to break the connection as soon as Hunter fused with Naruto."
"And how do you plan on doing that?" asked 'Hunter'. "You can't just pull them apart so..." his eyes widened as he put two and two together "Oh bugger."
Back in the real world
"Kakashi! Now!" yelled Tsunade.
Kakashi had made it back just in time to do his part in the mission. He made a quick hand sigh and activated his Lightning Cutter jutsu, bringing it down on Hunter's outstretched arm. It sliced through like butter. Instantly Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto, Kurenai and Inoichi were awake.
"Not so smart now are you?" Inoichi asked of no one in particular.
"Well? Asked Tsunade "Did you find out anything?"
"You have no idea Lady Hokage." Said a very shaken Sakura.
"You jerks!" Hunter yelled "That was my favourite ...guys?" He noticed their expressions and stopped messing around as his arm re-grew. "What?"
"What do you mean 'What'?!" Naruto yelled "Don't you have any idea what's in your own head?"
"The memories were faded Naruto." Said Inoichi. "He doesn't know."
"I don't know what?" Hunter took a step forwards, ignoring the shinobi all around him.
While all this was going on Kurenai was thinking, putting the pieces together. "You don't want to go home." She said, getting everyone's attention. "Lord Sarutobi, he theorised that you were working for someone. You'd lost your memories of home and your employer promised to get you back."
"Yes, and!?" said an impatient Hunter.
"So why stall? Why keep goofing off. You talk about your mission but all you seem to do is pull pranks and go off on a tangent." Hunter didn't respond so she carried on "It's because you don't have a home anymore. You destroyed it years ago. Part of you knows that and that's why you keep putting your mission off."
Hunter said nothing. He wanted to yell out it wasn't true, all lies but he couldn't. He looked round at everyone and just said "Screw you." before vanishing in a black portal.
"Not the kind of whit we'd been expecting!" Kurenai yelled after him as he went.
Everyone stood around, unsure of how to proceed.
Tsunade walked up to Kurenai "This is going to be a long debriefing, isn't it." It wasn't really a question.
"Yes Lady Hokage."
Tsunade rubbed her temples "I'm going to need some sake."
Over at Thorns secret base
"You knock" said Kiodmaru.
"No, you." countered Jirobo.
"Are you five years old!?" Tayuya pushed past them and into Thorn's control room.
There was the new 'boss' currently...dancing with that weird white creature.
"Yes?" Thorn asked as he and the Dancer continued.
"Ermmm, yeah" Sakon began. "we're wondering-"
"We want to know when we get to bust some heads!" Kidomaru butted in. "Seriously, what are we waiting for!?"
"Kimimaro isn't ready yet." Thorn stated "He needs time to adjust to his upgrades. And I've made sure the Leaf and hunter will be occupied until then." He and the Dancer pulled each other together "You're dismissed."
As the four left Tayuya couldn't resist taking a shot "So are you two always 'physical'?"
Thorn looked right at her "You're implying we have a sexual relationship. Yes."
"I...what."
"Tayuya, I'm part of an army of empty beings desperately trying to feel something again. Of course I have sex. All the time. Every time you leave the room. Twice when you were still in the room."
"Uh-huh." Was all she could manage, then she just left with the others, the door closing behind her.
"Was...he joking?" asked Jirobo.
Kidomaru shrugged with all six of his arms "I don't think he can joke. And what do you think he meant when he said the Leaf would be 'occupied'?"
Deep in space
On the bridge of a dark, malevolent ship a massive computer screen displayed a bounty "Wanted: Dead. Hunter Dark. Location : Elemental Nations. Pay: One Million Munny. Collateral Damage :non-concern."
The ship's captain smiled "Yesss. This will do."
Hollow Bastion
In a fair sized house a man was working on his armour, fixing battle damage when one of the computer screens on his wall came to life, showing a new bounty.
"Wanted: Dead. Hunter Dark. Location : Elemental Nations. Pay: One Million Munny. Collateral Damage :non-concern."
"Honey!" He yelled downstairs "Can you make dinner to go? A new job just came through."
Back in Twilight Town
DiZ was curious. That was nothing new, curiosity had always been a trait of his and it had frequently brought him misfortune. Hunter was back but he hadn't made a single remark at DiZ's expense yet. It was odd.
"Hunter? Did the mission proceed as planned?" he knew it hadn't but he may as well ask.
Hunter looked at his arm, which he transformed into a claw. "Diz" he had to force himself to ask "what's...what's a...Key...Keyblade?"
Well, I did warn you dark secrets would come out. Hunter's brain is an absolute mess, and it's only going to get worse.
Tune in next time for a bounty hunter bonanza with added psycho.
