Well, this took forever. Sorry of the long wait, free time has been short lately but hopefully this chapter makes up for it.
A big thanks to Mercenary X for letting me use their OC in this.
Enjoy
Chapter 20
"This is starting to get out of hand." Hunter muttered to himself. He was hiding in a tree overlooking one of the Leaf's smaller training fields. There was only one person there, Hinata, practicing her chakra control. Watching, Hunter drummed his fingers against the tree's bark. He'd finally gotten that stupid data DiZ had asked for, that had made the old man happy, or at the very least less grumpy. But he'd also asked about Keyblades.
Hunter instinctively tensed up. Just thinking that word made him feel like someone was walking over his grave. Ever since he'd seen that 'light' in Hinata's Heart he'd had this nagging fear in the back of his mind and he had no idea why. Key-blade was a silly world. It sounded ridiculous but it still made him afraid.
DiZ had explained it to him. The too long didn't listen version was that they were magic weapons that, among other things, could perma-kill Heartless. Naturally DiZ had asked why Hunter was asking him about this and he given him a copout answer of 'just a feeling'. He wasn't sure if DiZ believed him but he knew that telling him about Hinata would be a bad idea. He'd have preferred to ask Riku and leave DiZ in the dark but apparently he was off on another mission.
"Keyblade." Hunter chewed over the word "Keyblade. Keyblade. KEYblade." He thought that saying the word enough times would make it meaningless. It wasn't working. "Bollocks." Now swearing, that was helping.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
Hunter almost fell out of the tree in surprise. Sitting on the branch next to him was the spectral form of Fem-Hunter. Apparently this nightmare wasn't quite over yet.
"You!?" he yelled in surprise and alarm. Remembering where he was he quickly looked over at Hinata. Thankfully she hadn't heard him and was still training so he turned back to his new headache. "How are you still alive?"
"I'm a figment of your imagination. I can't die anymore than an idea can die." She responded as she glanced over at Hinata. "She doesn't have a Key yet. It might find her unworthy and move on."
Hunter blinked in confusion. "You were listening to DiZ and me?"
"Not like I've got anything else to do." She reclined on the branch, staring lazily up at the sky. "So. You wanna talk about what they told you?" Hunter jumped down from the tree and started to walk away. "You can't run from this forever!" she yelled after him.
He spun round and yelled back "Yes I ca-and she's gone." Fem-Hunter had vanished. "So to top everything off I'm going insane. What else can go wrong?"
There was a loud boom like a thunderclap. Hunter looked up and saw what looked like a meteor streaking trough the sky. It fell and hit somewhere in the forest beyond. "Me and my big mouth. Oh snap."
A short while later Hunter was standing at the edge of a crater at the centre of which lay an evil looking drop pod. It was clearly empty but the large footprints leading away told Hunter that whatever had been inside was large and heavy. And it was heading in the villages direction.
There was another loud boom and a column of smoke began to rise in the distance.
"Bugger bugger bugger bugger!" Hunter cursed as he ran at full speed towards the sound.
Over in the Leaf
"What a drag." Shikamaru groaned as he and his team stood their ground. They'd been closest when the commotion started so they were the first on scene. And it was quite a scene indeed. Most of the street they were on had been torn up, there was a massive hole in the village wall just ahead and several building looked like they'd been bulldozed. All the civilians had gone already so everything was eerily quiet.
Then with a loud crash something tore its way out of a shop, demolishing the structure.
"Oh...shit..." Ino breathed.
The thing in question was a man...a huge man made even larger by the colossal black armour he wore. The armour was advanced like a machine that whirred and buzzed as it moved. The man's head was framed by the top part which connected to the back of his head with several thick cables in a horrific parody of a halo. The beings face was withered, scared and unnaturally grey with glowing red eyes. Eyes which were now looking directly at them.
With heavy, thundering steps the thing walked towards them. Choji looked like he was about to pass out, while Ino was starting to tremble. Shikamaru's mind was racing, trying to discern a weakness, make a plan, something, anything.
The man stopped a few feet away, it extended its arm and a hologram of Hunter appeared in his palm. "Scum! Have you seen this creature!?" its booming voice was commanding and echoed unnaturally.
Shikamaru was about to answer but Hunter himself appeared in the street behind the newcomer.
"Hey guys! I found all these foot prints in the woods so I...figured..." the man turned and towered above Hunter "that...bigfoot was..." a colossal war mace appeared in his hands "I'm so scared I can't even finish my lame joke."
The man-monster raised the mace over his head and brought it down, Hunter leaping back to avoid being hit. The impact made the ground shake, and carved a hole in the earth. "Hmhmhm." The man chuckled. "So, you're our bounty. I was expecting more of a challenge."
Hunter shrugged. "Yeah, I get that a lot...wait...our bounty?"
As if on cue a second figure bust out of the building next to Hunter, smacking him into the building opposite. The new warrior hade the same armour as the last only he wore a horned helmet and carried a great sword in one had and some strange smaller blade in the other.
Hunter got up and shook the dust himself off. "Eliphas...and Araghast!"
The one without a helmet smirked "It seems my reputation precedes me. Even in this backwater." He spat out the last word like it was something vile.
"Arrogant as always Lord Eliphas." A third giant came into view further down the road. This one had several large horns adorning his monstrous armour, the gauntlets were a pair of huge mechanical claws with an ominous looking hole set in each palm. His face was even worse that the first man. The lips on left side of his mouth were gone, exposing his teeth and gums, with two cables running through the hole and another that snaked up into his nostril.
"Silence Nemeroth!" Eliphas shoot back. "Cast your magic and let us be done."
Nemeroth rolled his eyes and extended one of his massive hands in Hunter's direction. Instantly it was wreathed in purple fire, as was Hunter, who was clearly struggling to move. With considerable effort Hunter managed to point his own hand at Nemeroth and fired a dark bolt at him, forcing the giant to block.
Free, Hunter charged at the Chaos sorcerer, slamming into his leg and pushing him backwards. Nemeroth reached down, grabbed Hunter in his massive metal claw and with ease tossed him aside. "Hmmm. This one is surprisingly resistant to my touch." he muttered.
"Or perhaps your not as favoured by Tzeench as you believe." said a very smug looking Eliphas.
"FOR THE BLOOD GOD!" Araghast roared as he charged at Hunter. The Heartless Lord leapt over the superhuman, grabbing the horns of his helmet and pulling him over backwards. Before he could do anything else someone huge kicked him so hard he went flying into a building. It was a fourth bounty hunter. This one was wearing smaller armour than the others and-
"BAWXES!" It was Carron.
"Oh god not him again!" groaned Choji.
"Didn't we kill him?" asked Ino.
"No" Shikamaru didn't take his eyes off the fight as he spoke "that was a 'replica' remember. This guy must be the original."
"Ya don't say Sherlock!" Hunter yelled at them.
"Your BAWXES shall be a gift to the BAWX GOD!" Carron yelled then he started cackling insanely. Having had enough of this nonsense Hunter leapt towards the lunatic, smashing him in the face and sending him tumbling backwards. His joy was short lived however as Araghast started shooting at him with his bolt gun as Eliphas and Nemeroth approached.
Carron, who'd landed close to the ninjas rose to his feet and held up some kind of –
"METAL BAWX!" which turned Carron to steel before it disappeared. Carron glowered at Hunter, who was still fighting the other Chaos Lords and said "Now is the hour of our victory!" Then he fell over, hitting the floor with a loud metallic clang. Apparently he'd turned himself into a living immobile steel statue.
The three genin just stood there with huge sweat drops on the backs of their heads.
"I think this one's even dumber than his clone." said Ino.
"Miserable CUR!" Eliphas roared as he swung at Hunter with his mace.
"Shit!" Hunter dodged but got backhanded mid air by Nemeroth.
While this was going on Araghast had gone over to where Carron lay, picked him up and hurled him at Hunter. The frozen chaos lord had just enough time to scream "YOU DIE TODAYYYY!" before he slammed into Hunter.
"Ow!" Hunter groaned as he pushed Carron away. "Arrgh. What do you four want!? Who put a bounty on me?!"
Eliphas smirked "Someone's offering a lot of munny for your head whelp. With the reward I will buy a fearsome band of mercenaries, depose that Armless Failure and finally take my rightful place as Lord of the Black Legion!"
Hunter let out a tired sigh "Of course you are. Ok, I'm done with this, time for some fun with portals." With that he reached out his arm and opened up a black portal right underneath Eliphas. The giant instantly fell in, followed seconds later by Carron, who Hunter unceremoniously chucked in after him. Araghast went in next, he charged at Hunter, slashing at him with his sword only to be tripped then thrown down into the portal. The last one in (or out depending on how you look at it) was Nemeroth. Hunter leapt up onto the back of the giants armour, narrowly avoiding a claw swipe, and started ripping out cables.
"This looks important." He began pulling on several cables that clearly control the armours motor functions. It began lurching haphazardly towards the still open portal before falling over the edge.
Nemeroth just managed to grab hold of the other edge of the portal and yelled "Base creature. When we return you shall know the wrath of-"
"Oh piss off!" Hunter punched him square in the face and the sorcerer fell, disappearing into the swirling black abyss.
"OK," Hunter said to himself "that's done. Now we'll have no more..." More ninjas had shown up. Several ANBU were standing on the rooftops along with a load of rank-and-file ninjas and Asuma.
"Ok, time out!" Hunter yelled "This is starting to get ridiculous now. So let's all just...wait, why am I blue?" A thin blue aura had appeared round Hunter's body, then without warning he was slammed into the wall on his left, then the wall on the right, then he was lifter up high into the air and brought smashing down. "Owwww." He groaned.
It didn't take long for the culprit to show himself. Hovering in the sky just above the buildings was what Hunter presumed to be another bounty hunter. Whoever he was he was wearing some kind of mechanical suit that wouldn't have looked out of place in a mecha anime. Two large mechanical bird wings were attached to the back giving the suit flight; he also had a tail which gave Hunter the impression that this newcomer wasn't entirely human. Then there was the sword, a surprisingly ordinary looking, but still large, katana it held in its right hand.
"Someone's been watching too much Gundam." Hunter muttered as he rose to his feet. "Let me guess, here for the bounty?"
"You got it." It spoke in a man's voice, slightly distorted by the helmets speaker. "Your head's worth a lot of munny." He slowly descended to ground level; the wings folding back as he touched down. "Now this is the point where I make some kind of quip like 'dead or alive, you're coming with me', right?"
"No, it's where I beat the snot out of you." Hunter charged forwards. The bounty Hunter slashed at him, forcing him to dodge, and then he was thrown aside by a telekinetic blast. 'Ok, this might be trickier than I thought.' he thought to himself as he summoned his hook weapons. He charged in again but the bounty hunter stepped out of the way then lifted him off the ground and threw him high up into the air. Before Hunter could react the mercenary blasted towards him, attempting to cut him in half with one stroke. He dodged mid-air, barely avoiding the blade. He did however manage to wrap one of his chains round the man's leg as he sailed past, and had he landed he grabbed hold and started to pull.
The mercenary reacted by putting his engines to full throttle, forcing Hunter to dig his heels in but even with his enhanced strength he was still slowly getting pulled along.
"I'll be done in five." said the man "What's for tea again?"
Hunter blinked a couple of times "Erm...what?"
"Not you, idiot! Wha- no honey not you!"
"Are you having a phone call!?" Hunter yelled.
"No." The mercenary was not a good liar.
"You are!" Hunter yelled incredulously "You're having a phone call in the middle of a fight!" Furious, Hunter launched himself upwards, slamming into his enemy and sending them both careening through the sky.
"GET OFF ME!" the mercenary yelled as Hunter tried to prize his helmet off.
"Shut up and GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Hunter pulled as hard as he could, ripping the helmet off but also losing his grip, causing him to tumble back to earth. Once he'd landed safely (crashed) he took a look at his prize. Inside the helmet was obviously quite advanced but what really drew his attention was the name written in marker pen in the back.
"Nick?" Hunter said allowed. This Gundam wannabe was called...Nick. He'd been expecting something longer containing a few whys and zeds. Disappointed he crushed what remained of the helmet and looked back up at his pursuer.
"Oh fucking fantastic!" Nick groaned "My wife's going to bloody murder me now you arse...Erm...hello?"
Hunter had completely frozen staring at the man's face. It was mostly human apart from the purple skin and two bone-like protrusions on either side of his head.
"What?" the man asked.
"fff...fffff" Hunter was shaking, a black aura starting to build round his body.
"Er...you ok? Something on my face or-"
"FFFFUCKING FURRY!" Hunter roared as the black aura exploded to life.
"I'm going to be late for dinner." Nick dead-panned.
Hunter lunged at him but the man fired his engines and moved out of range. Hunter repeated this three times, getting more and more incensed each time. "Get back down here and fight like a man you furry fuck!"
"I'm not a furry!" he yelled back "I just spliced a little Mewtwo DNA to get the psychic powers. I didn't know I'd get the look as well."
"No excuse!" Hunter practically screamed "You're a furry. You get purged!"
"That's kinda racist, man."
"JUST DIE!" Hunter loosed a barrage of dark bolts at the man. He managed to dodge every last one but while he was distracted Hunter leapt at him again, this time he made contact, grabbing hold of him and punching him in the face. The pair fell to earth where they continued to grapple until a small ball with a blinking red light rolled between them.
They both looked down at the tiny thing "Yours?" asked Hunter.
"Nope." replied Nick.
The red light started blinking faster.
"Oh shit!" they both said at the same time. The two of them dived for cover just as the grenade exploded, Nick smashing through a window and Hunter tumbling behind a fruit cart.
"Oh god, not another bounty hunter!?" Hunter groaned.
"Bounty hunter?" said a deep metallic voice. Hunter and Nick both looked up.
"Ah shit, not him." clearly Nick knew this guy.
Well, he wasn't a 'guy' exactly. The new bounty hunter was a robot. It was humanoid with a silver body, a skull like face and a pair of short red horns sprouting from its temples. Its torso was covered by green body armour and on its back was a red cape and several weapons including an axe and what looked like a rocket launcher.
"No, no, no" the metal man continued "I prefer the term Freelance Peacekeeping Agent, yes."
A few miles away
Tsunade was watching the whole thing through a pair of binoculars. She lowered them for a second and grabbed hold of the nearest ANBU ninja and demanded "How the hell did that" meaning the robot "sneak past our defences!?"
Back with Hunter
"Fuck off Death's Head!" Nick yelled. "This is my bounty and I'm not splitting the reward!"
Death's Head only now seemed to notice Nick "Ah the Mewtwo furry. Having trouble with this one, yes?"
"I am not a Furry!"
Death's Head suddenly aimed a massive assault rifle at Hunter, who'd been trying to sneak away "Going somewhere, no?"
Hunter froze, muttered an "Errmmm" then he fired off several dark bolts and ran for it. Nick and Death's Head were forced to dive out of the way, Nick taking flight while Death's Head returned fire. He was using some kind of exploding ammo. One shot hit near Hunter and the blast threw him threw a building and into the street on the other side.
"I hate explosives." he said as he spat out some rubble.
Death's Head wasn't going to let him go that easy. Within seconds the robot bounty hunter was upon him, swinging an axe down at his head. At the last moment a blue glow enveloped the blade and the strike missed.
Nick dived down at Death's Head, slashing at him with his sword. "He's mine dam it!-OOF!"
Death's Head dodged, then smacked him aside but while he'd been distracted Hunter jumped up and smashed into his face, causing the giant robot to fall to the ground with a loud crash.
Hunter spun round to face the ninjas "Are you planning on jumping in at any point?!"
"Nah!" Asuma yelled back "You look like you're doing just fine!"
"I'll remember this you ba-wagghh!" Before Hunter could finish Death's Head grabbed him and threw him into a wall, then he brought up his rocket launcher, aimed and fired. Hunter had no time to dodge, the rocket hit him squared in the chest, sending him through the wall and into the building before it exploded, brining the whole structure down on top of him.
"Bitten off more than you could chew, yes?"
"Speak for yourself!" Nick swooped down at Death's Head, who narrowly avoided being decapitated. As he ducked under Nick's attack Death's Head swung his axe at Nick's back, slashing through the metal and damaging the machinery underneath. There was a great discharge of electricity as whatever Death's Head had just cut through started malfunctioning like crazy.
In a panic Nick looked round at the damage. He had just enough time to yell "Oh, son of a bi-!" then he winked out of existence like an old TV turning off.
Death's Head looked on, bemused. "Hmm. Maybe having a built in warp engine was not a good idea, yes?" Just then a black portal opened behind him. Quick as a whip he spun round, bringing out a futuristic looking rifle. "Saw it coming!" he said as he fired several shots into the portal. Nothing happened for a moment, then Hunter burst out of the rubble, slamming into Death's Head in a flying tackle that sent the robot assassin tumbling into the portal, which Hunter closed.
Hunter took a moment to collect himself. His whole body was lined with cracks, leaking dark energy but no serious damage had been done. Well, no serious damage had been done to him, the village however was a different story.
"Ooo, this erm... Ya know, I should go before-"
"HUNTER!"
"Too late."
Tsunade had arrived and she looked like she was about to murder him. Hunter started to retreat while holding up his hands in mock surrender.
"No I'd like to point out that none of this is my fault."
"I'd beg to differ!" Tsunade not in a forgiving mood right now. "When you came here you had a job, to kill that Thorn, whatever the hell he is."
"He's what called a No-"
"But you didn't!" she ignored him "Instead you just fooled around and let things escalate. My village had been invaded TWICE! Thorn's just started an arms race that's probably going to lead to a new shinobi war and even more super powered strangers just keep showing up! So yes Hunter this is all your fault!"
Hunter didn't really have an answer to that. Tsunade was right, this could have probably all been avoided if he'd just killed Thorn to start with but he couldn't change the past, and there was no way in hell he was admitting he'd made a mistake to anyone.
"Well I-GAHHH!" before he could even start his next snarky comment Tsunade punched him in that face so hard Hunter was knocked right off his feet. "Owww" he groaned as he got back up "Por qué?
Espere, qué!? Qué hiciste para mí, bruja?!"
"I think you broke him." Said Asuma, who'd come down from the rooftops.
"No problem I can fix this." Tsunade drew back her arm for another punch.
"Hmm, no no la cara!"
WHACK!
Again Hunter rose to his feet, slightly dazed "Aahh. Oh for the love of!" well, he was speaking the right language again but the accent was still..."I sound like I just stepped out of Eaton, what the bloody hell!?"
Tsunade shrugged "Third time's that charm?"
"Wait, just one moment." Hunter cleared his throat "We are blessed by the power of the land raider! There's no butter on my scones! I'm off to play the grand piano!"
WHACK!
"Moron." muttered Tsunade as Hunter got unsteadily to his feet.
"Ok I'm...better. I think. And you're right."
Tsunade blinked a few times "Excuse me?"
"Yes, I should have dealt with this sooner I" Hunter had to force the words out "made a mistake. And If I'm going to fix this ...I need your help."
Tsunade wasn't angry anymore. Well, she was but she was suppressing it for now. "OK, let's start from the beginning."
Hunter gave a tired nod, then he saw someone walking towards him. At first he thought it was Thorn but this was someone ...new. It looked like a copy of Hunter but is was off, it had a larger mouth that stretched from ear to ear, full of sharp teeth but weirdly no one else seemed to notice him at all. A bad replica, maybe? Then the nightmare version of him walked right through someone like a phantom.
Hunter just stared at him, seriously questioning his sanity at this point.
"Ah, but who's beginning do we start at, yours?" the phantom asked "Or ours?" He was only a few feet away from Hunter now "Naruto didn't tell you about me now did he? Hm hm hm."
In another world
"I'm cursed." grumbled Eliphas "That's the only explanation. I have been cursed by the Dark Gods to a life of failure and misery." As he complained he was slowly being surrounded by more and more of this worlds natives, a race of sapient and brightly coloured ponies. Truly vile abominations.
"Cursed you may be" said Nemeroth "but I suggest we find some means of returning to our world soon. Araghast has already gone native." He pointed a massive mechanical finger at the aforementioned Chaos Lord who was currently playing with several of the pony creatures.
All Eliphas could do was facepalm. Well, at least Carron had been quiet for-
"METAL BAWXES!"
"SHUT UP!" both Eliphas a Nemeroth yelled together.
Somewhere in the lanes between
As Nick floated helplessly in the multicoloured void he silently weighed up his options. He could either A; wait here and home some form of rescue came, which was unlikely or b; bite the bullet and call home. Eventually he decided on option B as there was less of a chance he'd starve to death.
Gingerly he reached into one of his pockets and pulled out his mobile phone and speed dialled home.
"Hi honey it's me...no I erm...didn't have any luck today. A-actually I need and pick up...Well the suits too damaged to get back and I'm stuck in the Lanes Between!...How didn't I get here? Someone broke that warp engine that you told me to install!...What!? No I don't mean this is your fault I...yes dear? *defeated sigh* yes dear I'll turn on the homing beacon." With that he turned put away the phone and activated his armours locator beacon. He probably be stuck here for at least several hours before his wife found him though.
"One million bottles of beer on the wall, one million bottles of beer..."
And that's the end of that. In the next chapter (Which will not take nearly a year this time) Hunter an the Leaf will start actually working together. What could possibly go wrong.
Now if you'll all excuse me *lifts a samurai sword off the wall* I have and army of zombie clowns from outer space to deal with. Mercenary know what I mean.
