Chapter 22
"So this won't be a problem will it?" Hunter asked.
After convincing Nick to help him Hunter had brought him back to the Hidden Leaf. The two of them were now standing in Tsunade's office where the Hokage herself was sitting at her desk, tapping her fingers on the wooden surface.
'I knew I'd have to deal with some weird shit as Hokage but this is above and beyond.' she thought. "Alright, the village has employed mercenaries before, there's just the matter of your pay."
Nick shrugged "Hunter's promised me the pick of loot from Thorn's base."
Tsunade gave Hunter a sideways glance.
"Well I'm not letting any of you get your hands on it, am I." He said defensively.
Tsunade sighed "God dam it Hunter."
"If it makes you feel better I have a recording of my wife beating the shit out of him." Nick chimed in.
"YOU WHAT!?" Hunter yelled.
"And I'm willing to sell it to you for a reasonable fee."
Tsunade put on a big smile, stood up and reached out to shake Nick's hand. "Deal."
"No deal!" Hunter wasn't having it. "That video is never getting out you furry fu-GAAAHHH!"
Nick hit Hunter with a telekinetic punch so powerful it sent him smashing through the roof and into the sky beyond.
Both he and Tsunade stood there for a moment until he said "Sorry 'bout that."
"Oh, I'm far too happy to care right now."
About a mile away. At the bathhouse.
"Ahhhhh." Anko sighed in pleasure as she descended into the hot water. "God that's good."
"It's just a bath Anko." said Kurenai, the only other person there.
"It's the first chance I've had to relax it days." Anko shot back. "Ever since you-know-who showed up..."
Kurenai raised an eyebrow "You mean Hunter?"
Anko sat bolt upright "SHHHH! Don't say the name!"
"Oh for god sake Anko, he's not a demon. He won't appear if you say his-"
CRASSH
SPLASH
The two women looked from the hole in the roof to the water as Hunter slowly got back up.
"I'm going to murder that furry fuck." Then he noticed the two naked women. "Oh snap." For some reason his eyes settled on Anko. 'Don't say it. Don't say it. DON'T SAY IT!' said his brain.
"Jiggle jiggle." said his mouth.
'God damn it.'
Five seconds later Hunter was being chased out of the baths by a very angry sword wielding Anko. "Get back here!" she yelled. "I'm going to ram this sword so far up your-"
With the two of them gone Kurenai sank back into the water "I need a proper vacation."
An hour later, back in Tsunade's office
"So does trouble follow you, or do you actively seek it out?" Tsunade asked.
Hunter rubbed the back of his head "Well, it's not like I was aiming for-"
"That was rhetorical Hunter!" She leaned back in her chair, forcing herself to calm down. "*sigh* Alright, now that everyone's here we can go over the plan." 'Everyone' in this case meaning the Kakashi, Guy, Asuma and Kurenai. "Teams Eight, Ten and Guy will assault the enemy to draw out their forces, then once they're committed Nick will attack from above and destroy them."
Nick, who was standing over in the room's corner, nodded in acknowledgment.
"While enemy forces are occupied, Hunter will breach the base's defences, allowing himself and Team Seven to infiltrate and destroy it from within."
"What could possibly go wrong?" Hunter asked sarcastically.
Tsunade's eyebrow twitched a little "Which brings me to my next point. After Thorn is gone Hunter I want you to leave to."
To everyone's surprise Hunter looked very nonchalant. "Hmm. I take it you don't just mean the village do you?"
"Look, even if you weren't so obnoxious your presence is one giant threat to the peace. Any force you side with, or even just give special treatment to, has a massive advantage over everyone else. Eventually you will cause a war, intentionally or not."
He still didn't seem bothered by this "I'd argue that you never had peace, just calm. But very well. Once Thorn's gone, I'm out."
"Just like that?" asked Guy.
"Hey, I like you lot well enough but we're not exactly BFFs. Plus this world...it's not home, ya know?"
"Considering what you did to your actual home I'll take that as a good thing." said Shizune.
Again to everyone's surprise Hunter didn't get angry, he just gave Shizune a look and muttered "Low blow lady. Low blow."
"Alright, alright." Tsunade spoke up to get everyone back on track. "Now that's out of the way, here are some of the fine details."
Several hours later.
Despite being called a village the Hidden Sound was nothing more than a series of bunkers and underground laboratories in the Land of Sound. The current main base was located in the forest, at the base of a mighty tree. Under the previous management its location was a secret to all but Otogakure's ninjas, but that had all changed. Assembled outside the entrance were over one hundred men and women from every nation. Gangsters, missing nin, up-and-coming warlords and anyone who wanted more power, they were the first to arrive, Thorns first customers. Most of them were examining their new 'enhancements' or opening cases filled with futuristic weapons.
They were all so caught up in examining their new purchases that none of them had noticed that they were being watched.
Team Eight were hiding up in the trees, waiting for the signal to attack "That's... a lot." said a very nervous Kiba.
His teacher Kurenai nodded in silent agreement "I see a few faces from the bingo book but no one truly powerful."
One of the thugs on the edge of the group was examining his new mechanical arms. Two long blades sprung from his forearms, much to the amazement of his friends. He instantly started showing off, slashing at the air and striking poses as they egged him on.
"Of course the book might be a bit outdated now."
"I'm going to rip those arms right off his-humph!" Hinata clamped her hands over her mouth. She was still suffering from outbursts of anger but they were lessening.
"Alright, everyone should be in position. We go in three-"
"DYNAMIC ENTRY!" Might Guy shot out of the undergrowth and slammed right into the man with metal arms' back. The arms might have been metal but his spine wasn't and from the way his back bent around Guy's foot he wasn't getting back up any time soon.
"Two, one." Kurenai finished in an 'I should have seen that coming' voice.
With that everyone sprang from the tree line and attacked. Kurenai used her Tree Binding Death illusion to trap a man aiming a strange rifle at her, then she killed him with a kunai to the chest. As he fell back his hand reflexively squeezed the trigger, sending a red bolt into the back of another thug, burning right through them.
The rest of her team were having similar success. Kiba and Akamaru had used their Beast Human Clone technique and were both tearing through opponents. Shino was close by, using his bugs against several panicking foes while Hinata was-
"DIIIEEE!" punching people really hard.
'God damn it Hunter' she thought as her normally shy student broke a man's arm with one blow, then cracked his ribs with a kick.
By now the element of surprise was gone and the thugs were starting to rally, several in the back looked like they were bringing heavy weapons to bear.
"Fall back!" Asuma's voice rang out over the battle "Fall back!"
Hinata wasn't listening so Kurenai grabbed her and started to retreat with the others.
"No! I want to keep fighting!" she protested before realising what she'd just said.
"If Thorn doesn't kill Hunter I think I might." Kurenai muttered as she and the other ninjas ran back into the forest.
The thugs were in hot pursuit, firing their new weapons at the retreating ninjas. A bolt of green plasma went past Asuma's head, obliterating several tree branches. This was the part of the plan Asuma didn't like, they had to stay far enough in front to make it look like they were running away but not so far that the enemy gave up and went back.
"This was a bad idea!" said Choji, who was just off to his left "This was a VERY bad idea!"
One of the Thugs yelled out "Ten yen to whoever nails the fat one!"
"I'm not fat! I'm just chubby!GAHH!" Choji's anger was cut short when a barraged of gunfire came his way.
'Their aim's improving' Asuma thought 'Now or never.'
"Break!"
Everyone stopped retreating and turned to attack. The thugs weren't expecting it and Asuma managed to kill two before the rest started regrouping. All they had to do now was holed out until phase two.
Several miles above all this
"Is there any reason you couldn't have done this yourself?" Nick asked. He was talking to Hunter, who he was currently holding by the arms below him. Hunter had explained that he couldn't just portal into Thorn's base but Nick was still confused why he didn't just shape shift a pair of wings and fly himself.
"If I could do that I would have!" Hunter shot back. "Furry Airlines wasn't exactly my first choice ya know. Besides, why couldn't you just call a dropship for us or something?"
Nick gave Hunter a 'seriously' look "Dropship? I'm not made of munny. No Thanks to you."
"Hey, that was your fault for trying to kill me you furry fuck!"
"Oh and would you look at that, we're here." said Nick, smugly.
"At last. Now just set me down near wait what are you-"
Nick did a barrel roll and threw Hunter with all his might at the ground.
"SNNNNNNAAAAAAPPPPP!"
"*sigh* He may be tough but he ain't too bright."
With that out of the way Nick went back to his job. Finding the ninjas wasn't too hard, even without his suits detection systems he could have just followed the explosions. "Time to earn that pay cheque." he said as he drew his sword.
Nick swooped in low and hit the back of the group of thugs, cutting down seven with one blow then flying right through the group, carving a path towards the ninjas. Once he was near the middle he shot back up until he was a few feet above everyone, then his suit launched a swam of small missiles, wiping out a large chunk of foes and demolishing several large trees. Nick killed his engines and landed on a surviving branch roughly in the middle of the area he'd just cleared.
"And there's phase two." said Asuma. "Fall back!" the Leaf Ninjas moved to a safe(ish) distance in the trees while the thugs turned inward to face Nick.
"Could you form an orderly queue? I want to keep track of how many of you I kill so I know what to charge for this job."
Naturally none of them answered back but three of the closest goons reached into their pockets and pulled out bottles containing a glowing green liquid. They each downed the contents in one go and stared growing. Their muscle bulged ridiculously, tearing apart their cloths although thankfully their pants remained.
"Ah, Venom. Bane's going to sue someone." Nick muttered to himself.
The three 'roided out men charged forwards. Nick caught the leader with his telekinesis and smashed him into the man on the right. He stepped out of the way of the remaining thug and casually bisected him as he went past. His engines fired back to life and he rocketed towards a man holding a glowing demon blade. "God I love my job!"
Back over at the Base
Team Seven were still waiting in the tree line behind the base's entrance, listening to the distant sounds of battle.
"Hmm. Wish we were over there." Naruto muttered as a particularly loud explosion went off.
His other two teammates rolled their eyes at his stupid lust of battle while their teacher just looked straight ahead. "Hunter should be here by now, where-"
CRASSHHH!
At that moment Hunter came shooting down from the sky, slamming into the base entrance like a missile.
While the three genin just stared in disbelief Kakashi was more relaxed "Unorthodox but I'm not complaining."
The four of them quickly darted into the hole Hunter had made. It was immediately obvious that this base was a lot bigger than they'd first thought. It looked like Hunter had gone through four floors before stopping. They found Hunter a little further in, surrounded by three unconscious goons and holding the remains of some kind of skeleton robot.
"You are Terminated!" Hunter ripped the machines head off and crushed it before turning to the others "Stragglers." He explained. Reunited the group moved deeper into the base following Hunters lead. The base was a dark, bleak place made entirely of grey stone. It felt cold and devoid of any life or any sense of good at all. In fact Hunter was convinced that nothing good had ever happened here at all.
After a while Naruto noticed they were approaching a dead end. "Hey Hunter, that's a-"
Hunter reached the wall and smashed right through it.
"Oh, right." Naruto said, rubbing the back of his head with embarrassment.
They carried on this way for a few minutes before they reached a large open space full of metal crates.
Kakashi cracked one of them open, finding several advanced rifles and ammo. "Alright, we've found one of Thorn's weapon stores, start setting you tags."
Team seven set about their work placing explosive tags on as many boxes as they could while Hunter just looked around, trying to list off as may items as he could.
"Don't know, don't know. Plasma rifle. Flame thrower. Don't know. Runic swords. Gas grenades..."
Naruto meanwhile had found a box containing a plant. The plant them came alive and started to strangle him. "GAHH! Get it off, get it offff!"
Hunter shook his head "I've seen enough Hentai to know how this goes. I'm out."
Sasuke gave a groan of frustration, then he set the plant alight with his fire ball jutsu. Instantly it let go of Naruto, who fell to the ground gasping for breath.
"That plant was moving!" he yelled getting as far from the now very dead plant (pile of ashes now) as he could.
"All plants move Naruto." said Sakura.
"True." Hunter agreed "But Triffids are the only ones that'll uproot themselves and case after you."
More carefully now the ninjas finished setting their explosives and moved on. They hadn't gotten far at all when they ran into a familiar face.
"Kabuto!" Naruto growled as he saw the white hair man approaching.
For his part Kabuto was surprised to see them but that quickly faded. For a tense moment the two groups squared off until Kabuto broke the silence "Thorn's that way." He pointed down the corridor to his left. "Left, right, then go straight to the end. He's in a large empty room I think."
"Waiting for us probably." Hunter sighed. "Alright, I won't tell if you won't." He stepped aside to let Kabuto pass. Kakashi and the others didn't seem to think this was a good idea but they went along with it for the sake of the mission. As he walked past Hunter noticed that he was carrying a glass jar containing a...hand. 'Just when I think I've seen everything.'
Kabuto stopped as he past Naruto and smirked at him "Aww, don't be sad. We'll see each other again very soon."
For a moment Kakashi though he might have to physically restrain Naruto but Hunter pointed a dark bolt at Kabuto and said "Did I say you could stay and chat?" Kabuto gave him an annoyed look, then he ran off, disappearing into the darkness.
"Was that a good idea?" Kakashi asked.
"Orochimaru's gone." said Hunter "How dangerous can he be on his own?"
Soon the four of them were standing outside the room Kabuto had pointed them too. The door didn't look special and Kakashi was sure there were no traps.
"So, we clear on the plan?" Hunter asked. All four of them gave him a determined look and nodded. "Excellent." Hunter the door off its hinges and walk in.
Kabuto was telling the truth, this was just a big empty room. Well, empty except for Thorn who was standing in the middle of the room, looking right at them.
"That door wasn't locked." He was as emotionless as usual.
"I know." Hunter replied, casually strolling closer "It's just that breaking your shit makes me feel better." He looked back at the four ninjas "Stay there. The Scarecrow's mine."
"The Wizard of Oz. The one who wanted a Heart." Thorn and Hunter started circling each other. "Your originality hasn't improved."
"Aw, you're breaking my Heart brother." Hunter summoned his hooks, letting them scrape along the floor as he walked "You're breaking my Heart."
Hunter charged forward, slashing at Thorn but before he could land his blow a Creeper Nobody appeared from nowhere and wrapped around Thorns left arm, making a large round shield. Hunter slammed into the Creeper Shield, forcing Thorn to skid backwards but otherwise doing no damage.
'Since when could he do that!?'
A second Creeper appeared to Thorn's right and morphed into a sword, which he took hold of and then counter attacked. Hunters weapons were not made for defending so he was forced back.
Thorn got into a defensive position, holding his shield in front proudly showing off the Nobody symbol.
"You brought friends." Hunter joked.
"And you didn't bring any." Thorn shot back.
Hunter made a mocking offended face "Ouch."
"Why are you even here? Because it's the right thing to do? Heroism? Because you hate me that much? Or is it just because you have nothing else to do?" Thorn lowered the shield and stood up a little straighter "I've been watching alkl of you and I know what drives you. To be the best." he looked at Naruto "Revenge" then Sasuke "and a childish crush." finally Sakura. "I want to be real again. We all do."
Two Dragoons appeared, one on either side of Thorn. "And there's nothing I won't do for that goal!"
The Dragoons charged at him. Hunter leapt over the first one and hit the third square in the chest. Before it could react he changed his other arm into a claw and cut the Nobody in half, destroying it. The first Dragoon came back around but Hunter spun on the spot and hit it with a barrage of Dark Bolts. Thorn seized the opportunity and shield slammed him from behind, then he tried to follow up with a sword stab but Hunter managed to just slip past the blade.
Thorn pulled back and used a fira spell, sending three fireballs at Hunter. He deflected the first two and let the third hit, planning to use the smoke it created as camouflage for his next attack.
"Stopra!"
Instantly Thorn was frozen in time and Hunter made his move. He threw one of his chains at his Nobody and it wrapped round his middle, then Hunter opened a portal behind him and leapt through, pulling the still frozen Thorn with him. He fell through the sky for a moment, then he landed on solid metal. The thing he'd landed on was an Imperial Star Destroyer currently engaged in a battle in the sky over a desert world but Hunter wasn't really paying attention to that right now. Using all his might he slammed Thorn into the metal Hull of the ship then using the chain he flung him back up into the air, where Thorn collided with a Tie fighter, blowing it up. Not stopping Hunter pulled Thorn back down, this time crashing him into one of the ships smallest cannons, again destroying it. He violently pulled on the chain, wrenching Thorn free and launching him back towards Hunter.
"GET OVER HERE!"
The Creeper sword and shield were gone now, evidently they hadn't survived but the Stop spell had ended too. He spun in the air, going right over Hunters head and hit him in the back with as Thunder spell. Hunter stumbled forwards. Then he turned and threw himself at Thorn, rugby tackling him and sending them both Tumbling off the side of the ship.
They continued fighting as they fell. Thorn may have been good a swordplay and magic but up close and personal like this was where Hunter worked best. He dug his claw into Thorn's side and started repeatedly punching him in the face. Thorn grabbed Hunter's hand below the wrist, stopping the avalanche of blows so Hunter started head butting him. Thorn's scarf came to life and started wrapping round Hunter's neck, trying to push him away. Before the two of them could hit the ground one of them opened a portal and instead of hitting sand the two crashed into the middle of a battle between men and hulking green orcs.
Magic was being hurled left and right so no one particularly noticed the new arrivals. The two separated, the ends of Thorns scarf cracking like whips as he started charging blizzard spells in his hands. Hunter charged and Thorn cast his spells, sending three shards of solid ice at him. Quickly Hunter cast a air spell on himself, shielding him from the ice as he again tried to tackle Thorn. But the same trick wouldn't work twice, Thorn stepped out of Hunters way and punched down as he went past, slamming him into the ground. He tried to follow up by stabbing him with his scarf but Hunter was able to dodge and grab hold of one of the tendrils. Opening up another portal he pulled Thorn through, the two crashing back into the stone floor of the room they'd started in.
"Well, you have a lot of power." Thorn admitted "If only you have the skill to go with it."
Hunter was about to give a witty retort but Thorn cast a Stop spell on him. One moment he was looking at Thorn, the next he was staring at a massive ball of crackling dark energy. There was no time to dodge, it hit him and exploded, creating a massive gust of wind and throwing Hunter back against the wall. Immediately Thorn ran him through with a new Creeper sword, pinning him to the wall.
"GAH! Shit. Arhg, that..! Ow!"
"Did you really think this would work?" Thorn asked in a tone that sounded almost condescending. "Did you really think that I wouldn't see this coming? My 'customers' were just the bait to lure you in. The Sound Five are all outside, powered by Darkness."
Back with the rest of the Leaf Ninjas
"Well, this is a surprise." Nick said, dryly.
He'd beaten all the thugs, of course he had. They were strewn across the ground, some out cold, a lot were dead. The only ones left standing now were five newcomers, four men and one girl. Nick had been around long enough to know from their unique appearances that they weren't common mooks. That and according to his scanners they were all Darkness users.
"This is what Thorn sent us to deal with?" the girl asked. "This trash?"
"Hey, he did say that after this we could do as we pleased." said one of the men, the one with six arms. "I vote we kill the Leaf losers up there, then we do the same to their whole village."
"Sounds fun." The fat one agreed.
"I'm out." said Nick.
All five of the newcomers seemed surprised.
"You're what?" asked Sakon.
"I was paid to deal with enhanced humans, not Dark Warriors. I'm out."
"WHAT!?" Asuma yelled from the tree line behind Nick.
"You heard me!" Nick yelled back. "Running this suit ain't cheep so unless you can promise me a whole load of munny..." There was no reply "That's what I thought."
"He wouldn't." said Ino.
"He would." Shikamaru was more realistic.
Nick started to move out of the way leaving the sound ninjas looking deflated. Well, except for Kimimaro who looked as emotionless as ever.
Tayuya recovered first "Alright, lest break these new powers in, shall we." The five of them started charging their dark auras and began slowly advancing on the leaf ninjas.
Back with Thorn and Hunter
"Honestly you should just give up. It'll be easier than..." that's when Thorn saw something that didn't make sense. "Your hair's wrong." He was looking over at Sakura. "It was shot when I last saw you, now it's long. It couldn't have grown that much in that space of time."
"Oh for furk sake Naruto!" Hunter yelled "You had one lob man!"
All four ninjas looked guilty, then tree of them made hand signs and with a puff of smoke they turned into Narutos.
"Shadow Clones." Thorn realised.
"Yep." Hunter confirmed. Despite the sword in his belly he couldn't help but look smug. "All four of them. None of team seven were ever in this room." The four clones dispelled as Hunter kept talking. "See you're right about me. Smart as a sack of hammers but the thing is I didn't plan this mission. Tsunade did." Thorns face didn't change but Hunter could tell he was not happy "Battle Tits didn't become Hokage for her looks and she's surrounded by people whose job it is to be smarter than everyone else."
Cracks were starting to spread along Hunter's body. He didn't have much time left. "They know that you've been one step ahead this whole time and they knew that this was a trap, so they planned round it."
Back with the Leaf ninjas again
The Sound Five had barely taken a few steppes when they were halted by a barrage of Dark Bolts striking the ground in front of them. When they looked up they saw something unbelievable.
Five Hunters, all different colours standing before them.
"W-what the!?" began Kidomaru.
The five clones spoke "Hunter Red!"
"Hunter Green!"
"Hunter Blue!"
"Hunter Yellow!"
"Hunter Pink!"
There was a moments stunned silence, the Hunter blue looked at the others and said "Erm...which theme did we say we'd use?"
"Mighty Morphin?" said Yellow.
"No, Zeo!" Pink argued.
"Wild Force?" suggested Green.
"Shut it!" Red brought the argument to an end. "We're using Lost Galaxy. Now pose!"
The five of them went into a Super Sentai pose as an electric guitar played and an explosion went off behind them.
"You look like a bunch of queers!" Nick yelled.
"Furry fuck!" all the clones shot back at once. All five of them charged at the sound ninjas while Nick readied his helmets camera mode.
"I smell a new desktop wallpaper."
Annnnd Back to Hunter and Thorn.
"Yeah, by now the guys will have finished planting their explosives and are on their way out." The cracks were all over his body now and he was starting to fade away. "Look on the bright side, I've finally found something you and I have in common. Overconfidence!"
Thorn pulled his sword out, destroying Hunter's body.
He stood still for a moment, letting all this new information sink in. "Ok, new plan." He snapped his fingers and several Samurai and Dragoon Nobodies appeared. "Kill them all."
Things are heating up.
Tune in next time for the fight between Hunter Rangers and the Sound Five
