Disclaimer:
Carol Peletier, Sophia Peletier, King Ezekiel, Henry, Jerry, Shiva, and any other recognizable character or plot of The Walking Dead belong to AMC Network and Skybound Entertainment, Image Comics and Robert Kirkman.
In no way is the author claiming ownage of any of the characters nor is there any economic/monetary gain at any time. The author is extremely respectful of the original creators and is willing to take down this work of fiction if requested.
No copyright infringement intended.
Original characters are the property of the author.
Chapter 6: The Start of a New Life
"There's something I must confess."
Carol's heart drops as she hears the words come out of Ezekiel's mouth. She has taken this leap of faith, the risk of losing everything with the hope that things would turn out in her daughter's favor, but it hasn't even been half an hour and the shoe has already dropped. She can't help but think that he already regrets offering his home, that he's realized how much Sophia would need, how much they'd depend on him for the first few weeks, perhaps months and wants nothing to do with them. She feels desperation climb over her, overpower her, threaten to cut out her air supply. There is ringing in her ears that she can't seem to shake despite shaking her head. She now has to face the fact she'll have to go back to Ed's apartment and face his wrath for the rest of her life.
"Carol, are you feeling unwell?" Ezekiel's hand cups her right elbow, jolting her out of the storm that has been created in her mind. "You look pale."
"You don't have to explain." She says under her breath, her eyes trained on Sophia who is coming out of sleep, giving little grunts and sucking her own tongue as she has done from the time she's been a newborn until this very moment. Soon she'll have her eyes open, rubbing at her face and yawning. "Sophia and I will go back home, we'll visit... if that's still okay with you?"
"Visit?" Ezekiel's voice shows his confusion. It is only then that Carol turns to look at him. His face mirrors what his voice has told her; he is confused and not following her train of thought. It doesn't surprise her, she can barely keep track of where her mind goes when panic sets in, how can she expect Ezekiel to know what she's thinking when he's not inside her head?
"Here at the zoo? If you don't want Sophia and I to continue dropping by we can stop, I'll explain it to Sophia, she will understand."
"Wait, Carol, I'm befuddled." He raises a hand to stop her from speaking once more. "Why are you raising the question about perusing the zoo and me not desiring your visits. Have you changed your mind about leaving Ed?"
"No." She answers quickly, her mind still steadfast in the decision she's made. One way or the other, now or further down the line, she will leave Ed. "I still want to leave him. I understand, though, taking us in is a huge hassle, you don't have to explain."
"It is not a hassle and even if it was I would welcome it wholeheartedly." He assures her. Tenderly, his fingers caress her chin as he tilts her head toward him, giving enough pressure for her to know that he wants to look at her without forcing her to keep the gaze. "But we seem to have misunderstood each other."
Carol blinks confused. Had he not been talking about his offer?
"Then... what did you mean?" She can feel the heat creep up to her cheeks as she realizes that she jumped to a horrible confusion.
Ezekiel's confused face softens as his lips slowly rise into a smile. "Before I had the pleasure of making your and Princess Sophia's acquaintances, I had started the paperwork to house raise Shiva since she has not been welcomed back into her ambush. It was tentatively approved depending on whether she would be able to fully heal but now that the only thing we have to overcome is a limp, it seems she will be joining us at home."
"Oh." Her face is now fully burning. She can't help but raise a hand to her cheek, the one that is not hurt, to feel just how hot it is. She must be blushing bright red.
"Shiva would have full reign of my home, she won't be kept caged and I will be in charge of teaching her everything she needs to know to survive into adulthood within the zoo." He continues, giving her a wink to note her blushing. "If... if that is not something you are comfortable with, having Sophia interact with her on a daily basis, then I understand and I can annul the home raising."
"No, no, no." Carol quickly stammers out, her hand reaching over to press against his chest. "I can't ask you to do that. You must have been planning for this. I can't ask you to just turn your life upside down for us."
"You wouldn't have to request it," Ezekiel assures her, pressing the hand he has free from holding a sleeping Sophia over her own, securing it against his chest. "I would happily do it."
She blushes yet again but doesn't pull her hand away. His touch calms her, centers her. In a moment where she is literally turning her life, and her daughter's life, upside down, his reassuring touch is the only thing that is keeping her sane.
"Thank you." Carol can't help but let out a soft laugh as she turns to look at her daughter. Ezekiel is worried that she will want to keep her daughter as far away as possible from Shiva once the tiger cub is away from the zoo, away from where she knows she must behave. He's worried about her daughter's safety as much as she worries about Sophia. It truly warms her heart that he has her daughter's safety on the foreground of his mind, but what he doesn't know is how much her daughter loves Shiva, how much she talks about her whenever Ed is not around, and how much she wishes she could stay with her around the clock at the zoo. Shiva has never shown any aggression towards Sophia, on the contrary, she has shown nothing but love and the natural need to protect the young child. "I don't mind Shiva being in your home and I know for a fact that Sophia will not mind either. In fact, at the rate they are going, we might have a hard time keeping them apart."
Ezekiel's expression turns into that of happiness which floors Carol. He truly was going to pass the chance to be the one to help Shiva grow if it meant that she didn't want the tiger near Sophia twenty-four hours of the day. "It is settled then. Shiva is scheduled to be transported to my home at the end of the week. By then you and Sophia will have settled. Is there anything you need to retrieve from Ed's?"
She takes a moment to think. Ed had never been someone to splurge on his daughter or wife, so they had very little things to their names. Sophia had a total of three changes of clothes, one of which was a frilly dress that was to be worn whenever they had company over and which her daughter absolutely hated. She didn't fare better, having only two sets of clothes to switch around with the one she was currently wearing. She had no jewelry except for the small cross around her neck which had been a parting gift from her best friend before her wedding and her wedding ring, the shackle of her soul. She had no money and Sophia's only coveted doll had been lost and replaced by the stuffed tiger currently discarded on the floor in front of them. There really was nothing at the apartment that she could want, even Sophia's newborn pictures were in Atlanta.
"No." She finally admits, her voice strong as she directs her eyes to the gold ring on her finger. "And even if I did I would leave it behind. I want nothing of his."
She hesitates for a second, not because she doesn't want to discard it, but because she's worn it for so long it is almost part of who she is. Eventually, she reaches for the ring and twists it around until it finally slips free from her finger. Even in her wedding ring, a size too small, Ed had shown his cruel nature, making her wear it and never getting it resized. She lets out a sigh of relief, almost as if her soul was liberated with the slipping off the cold metal.
"I can dispose of it for you." Ezekiel offers, extending his hand, palm up, to receive the ring. There is absolutely no hesitation in her movements as she places it on his hand. "Here, I'll take it outside to be disposed of. Hold our Princess."
With Sophia now in her arms, Carol watches as he leaves the room. Shiva perks up from beside her and follows him through the glass with her eyes. "He's coming right back, Shiva." She assures the tiger cub, whose ears wiggle before settling on the floor in front of her once more.
Sophia stirs in her arms, this time with a little bit of waking intention, her eyes fluttering open and her mouth opening and closing before shutting her eyes again. She wiggles in Carol's arms, giving a grunt at the thought of fully waking. "Hello there." Carol greets her, a gentle finger tracing her daughter's chubby cheek. "Did you have a good nap, sweet pea?"
Sophia nods, humming softly to herself. She knows her daughter is not quite ready to wake up, so she talks to her in a soft voice. "Soph... I have something very important to tell you." Sophia's eyes finally slip open, their hazel color sparkling with the light coming from above her. "Do you want to hear what it is?"
Again Sophia nods but offers nothing more than her eyes trained on her mother. She must not remember where they are because otherwise, she would have bolted towards Shiva, ready to keep on playing. Instead, a hand raises and her little fist rubs her eyes. "Do you want to know where we will go after the zoo?" She asks.
Sophia's whole body stiffens at the thought of leaving the zoo and Carol doesn't blame her for the reaction although she is not sure if its because they will leave her beloved Tiggy behind or because she knows that the only place they could go to is back to the nightmare they had just escaped from. "No, Mama." She declares, her voice still laced with sleep. "Stay." She begs her then repeats herself as Ezekiel once more comes into the enclosure and sits besides them. "Stay?" She asks him.
"We can't stay here," Ezekiel admits to her, thinking the little girl wants to stay at the zoo to sleep.
Sophia pouts as she turns to look to her mother. Her eyes instantly glimmer with tears. She blinks and lets out big fat tears which slide down the sides of her face. "No crying, my little love," Carol whispers to her daughter. She leans down to press a kiss to her daughter's cheeks, her nose wet from where it rubs against her daughter's tears. Just as she feels Sophia's tiny arms circle her neck she starts to explain what will be happening. "We are not going back." She promises.
"No?" Sophia asks. When Carol pulls back she sees the confusion in her daughter's eyes, but she also sees a spark of hope. She can't help but feel like the worst mother on Earth for not taking Sophia away from danger before this.
"No." She states with a smile which only makes her daughter's own lips pull into a smile. "What do you think about spending some time with Ezekiel?"
Sophia cocks her head to the side, her eyes already sparkling with mischief as she considers her mother's words. "Tiggy?" She asks tentatively.
"Well, at first it will only be Ezekiel and us. He's letting us stay with him for some time while Mama takes care of some things." Carol explains. "But then Shiva will join us. Would you like that?"
Sophia nods eagerly, her head turning to the side when she catches a glimpse of Shiva's antics. The tiger cub has found her tail and is currently trying to snatch it. A wave of giggles erupts from Sophia as she watches Shiva do somewhat of a forward cartwheel in her attempt to catch the offending tail. "Silly."
"She is silly, isn't she?" Ezekiel asks as he bends down to shuffle Sophia's hair. "She's very young, like yourself, and we have to teach her a myriad of things."
"Me too?" Carol isn't sure whether Sophia is asking if she too has to learn things or if she's gonna be aiding in teaching Shiva.
"You will also learn, that's right. Maybe you and Shiva can learn things together. Would you prefer that?"
Sophia grunts with effort as she moves to sit on her mother's lap. She doesn't stay there long and soon moves to a standing position before walking close to Ezekiel. As if she's done it all her life, Sophia leans against him, her arms going around his neck. "I help!" She declares.
"It's settled then!"
—
They spend all day at the zoo.
Having spent most of the morning in Shiva's enclosure, Carol had to convince Sophia to actually see other exhibitions. They visited the rest of the tigers, then the lions and finally the elephants before Sophia declares she wanted to go back to Shiva.
By the time they make it back, Ezekiel is finishing his shift and is waiting on the next Keeper to come to relieve him from his post. Afterward, Ezekiel guides them through the back lots of the zoo and out to the worker's parking area. With each step she takes, Carol feels more and more that her decision had been the correct one. It would take some getting used to not having Ed hover over them, shadowing them in fear, that she would have to find her bearings and a job, no doubt eventually rent a place, but she is confident that she'll be able to do it. She had to; she had little Sophia to take care of.
"I don't possess a car seat." He admits. Carol doesn't expect him to and quickly adds it to the mental list of things she will have to get once she finds a job. "We'll detour to a store, obtain a car seat and essentials."
"I can't." Carol reminds him, feeling her cheeks flame once more. She knows it's not her fault, but the shame of not having money washes over once again.
"You mustn't fear." He begs her. "I'm not a King, I'm not rich, but we can afford some things."
With his help, she climbs into the back of his yellow and white Cherokee van then holds Sophia in her arms. She would have insisted on going in the front but she knows he chose the back as an added protection for her daughter. Once he climbs into the car and starts it they are off.
"I have a friend." He says once they leave the zoo's property. "She's a great lawyer. I can mention you to her. She might help you start legal proceedings against Ed; child custody, a restraining order, divorce."
"I...". Before she could answer to remind him, once more that she doesn't have means to pay the lawyer, he shakes his head and sends her a look through the rearview mirror.
"I know Carol. Please do not feel like you must suddenly be completely self-sufficient. I don't expect it and neither should you. My friend, Michonne, she will help pro-bono. Just last week she was telling me how she still owed pro-bono hours and this fits perfectly." She doesn't know how he can read her mind, but she finds herself thankful that he is voicing this instead of letting her go through shame after shame of not being able to afford things. "I'm not affronted in helping you and Sophia gather your bearings; do not feel shy about requesting things you need. Really, whatever it is."
"I will pay you back." She insists even as he shakes his head.
"I am not requesting you too." Ezekiel insists.
"I know." She gives him a shy little smile, a hand raising to brush away the tears of relief that sneak up on her. "But I will. I'll find a job and start helping and paying you back."
Ezekiel's eyes lock with her own through the mirror. They are full of mirth, full of assurance, and the knowledge that he probably won't take the money somehow calms her even further.
They stop at a store and after settling Sophia in the shopping cart, they are off.
Ezekiel first guides them towards the children section and by the intent in his step she knows that he's ready to pamper Sophia. At first, Sophia remains playing calmly with her stuffed tiger, singing to herself, completely uninterested. She has learned that shopping trips always involve things her father needs and wants and rarely means anything to her. However, as soon as Ezekiel produces a soft pajama set with tiny tigers all over the pajama bottoms and a sleepy tiger on the chest of the top and asks her if she likes it, Sophia squeals with delight and after a quick check with her mother, declares "Mine!"
Carol laughs at her daughter's reaction, having never seen her as eager to own pajamas as she does at the moment. The pajamas are soon followed by another set of jammers, a couple of stretchy pants and solid color blouses, underpants, socks, and two pairs of shoes; some tennis shoes and a pair of shinny black flats Sophia absolutely loves and refuses to take off.
"We still have to pay for them." Carol reminds her as Sophia attempts to tug at the tags.
"Pwease." Sophia begs with a final tug at the tag which refuses to come off, before giving her mother a full-on grin, showing off her pearly baby teeth.
Carol can't refuse her daughter and allows her to keep the shoes on after reminding her that she has to keep the tags on. For a second she feels like throwing out her daughter's ratty sneakers but she ends up putting them in the cart, her mind telling her 'just in case this is all a dream'.
She has just finished hiding the sneakers when Ezekiel comes out of the corner with a second cart, a child seat box inside of it. "What that?" Sophia asks as she twists her body to see as much of the box as she can.
"A child booster seat," Ezekiel replies. "I had difficulty narrowing down which one to get but this one says it's passed all of the safety checks and it's for kids of her age and weight."
"We don't have to get that one," Carol says, shaking her head. She knows there are cheaper ones. "Don't they have some that are just a seat? You can secure it with the seatbelt."
"No," Ezekiel disagrees. "We are not getting her those. It is unsafe and offers no protection."
She can't help but raise an eyebrow, a smirk appearing on her face even as she tries to suppress it. "Really? Since when did you become such a child seat connoisseur."
Ezekiel winks at her and gives her a tiny shrug. "Did you find everything we need for the princess."
"Most things... just need a bottle and some diapers."
After gathering everything they need for Sophia, which is probably more than Sophia has ever owned, Ezekiel guides them towards the women section. Instantly she feels the need to tell him that she doesn't need anything at all, but before she can say anything he is already asking Sophia what her mama needs.
"Tiggy jammies," Sophia answers eagerly. Carol is very sure that they won't be finding tiger pajamas in her size but still, Ezekiel and Sophia go on an adventure trying to find them while Ezekiel leaves her with the instruction to take the other cart and fill it with whatever she needs.
For a couple of minutes after she's left to her own devices, Carol simply stands by the cart, unsure of where to start. It's been such a long time since she's shopped for herself she's just not sure what she even likes anymore. Taking the cart, she walks through the aisles, her fingers smoothing over the different textures, picking up something, checking the tag then putting it back on the rack. She fully plans to pay back Ezekiel, but she still chooses the bare minimum and from there she chooses the least expensive items. Most of what she ends up putting in the cart is from the clearance rack but once she is satisfied she goes in search of two very loud adventurers.
"We didn't find tiger pajamas," Ezekiel informs her but quickly holds up what looks like a soft set of red pajamas. They look so comfy, so warm, and something she would have loved to wear long ago when she had been a naive girl.
"Those are expensive."
Ezekiel doesn't say a thing for a couple of seconds, his eyes taking in the details of her face. She knows he is studying her which only brings of rosy tinge to her cheeks and makes her look down, her fingers touching the soft material of the pajama bottoms.
"My house tends to retain a chill." He finally offers her a practical reason to take them. "It's not isolated in the woods, but it's in the outskirts of the city and while a fire is kept to guard off the worst of the chill I am afraid you would be uncomfortable, even in the summer. These will keep you warm."
"I suppose you won't take no for an answer."
"I shan't."
"Fine." She agrees with a roll of her eyes. "We'll take them."
"Then we'll add woolly warm socks as well."
She opens her mouth to protest but quickly closes it knowing that there is just no reason why she should protest buying socks. Instead, she follows her daughter and the man that is slowly winning her heart and chooses more than a couple of warm socks for herself and for Sophia.
If she had thought that clothes had caught Sophia's attention, she had been sorely wrong. With the promise that she could choose whichever toy she wanted, Sophia peruses the toy aisles, steps careful, eyes wide open, arms held tightly against her as she presses her tiger plush to her chest. Ed had never told her she could choose whatever she wanted. In the off chances that he gave them enough money to buy Sophia something, it had always been from the dollar section or clearance toys.
Stopping in the middle of an aisle full of dollies, Sophia holds her tiger even tighter to her chest with one hand as the other raises, thumb ready for suckling. Carol moves to her side, pulling her thumb from its destination. "What's wrong sweet pea?" She asks her.
Sophia gives a look around the aisle once more before turning to look at her mother. "Many babies." She declares.
Carol sighs sadly. Her daughter had never had the chance to chose her own toys and now that she had the opportunity she was overwhelmed. She didn't know which dolly to choose.
"There are many," Carol says as she silently promises Sophia that she'll never have to settle for second-hand toys or the clearance selection. "Do you want one like the one you used to have? Made out of cloth?"
Sophia instantly tightens her arm around her tiger. "No change." She begs her mother, her eyes wide, her mouth turning into a pout as her thumb once again starts making its way up towards her mouth. "My tiggy."
"Yes, that is your tiger," Carol promises. It takes her a couple of seconds to understand that Sophia doesn't want to choose a dolly made of cloth because she thinks she'll have to return her precious tiger plush. Her daughter hasn't quite understood that she is not exchanging a toy for the other but choosing a second toy to take home.
By the time she has made the connection, Ezekiel has knelt beside Sophia, placing a hand on Sophia's back. "You are correct, that is your faithful companion, your tiggy." He speaks to her in the softest voice Carol has ever heard. A warm feeling spreads through her chest as she watches her daughter interact with the much bigger man. Sophia isn't shying away from his presence, which Carol expects to happen from what her daughter had experienced with Ed. Instead, she is listening carefully to what Ezekiel is saying, nodding along in agreement. "No one shall ever take him from you, not without a fight from your Mama and I."
"Pwomise?" Sophia asks, her eyes narrowing as she maintains eye contact with Ezekiel.
"I promise." He says as he mimics a cross over his chest. "I shall personally battle for the safety of your tiggy."
Sophia lets out a tiny and soft giggle, so soft that Carol barely hears it over her daughter's hand which has raised to press against her tiny mouth. She almost looks like a shy miniature version of her mother. "Otay." Sophia declares.
"But now you get to choose another toy. A second toy. You keep your tiggy and you can choose a dolly."
"Otay." Sophia repeats before taking a step forward towards the boxes with the dollies. As if on an afterthought she turns once more to look at Ezekiel. "Otay, two?" she asks, needing to confirm that she had understood him.
"Yes, you get to keep both of them. Want to choose a dolly?" When Sophia gives him a nod he motions for the boxes and that is all the confirmation that her daughter needs before she starts looking at all the details the dolls offer.
Carol eventually has to turn around to discretely brush off her tears. She had always made sure that Sophia had the bare necessities, at times even going without herself so that her daughter wouldn't suffer, but she can see now that there has been so much that her daughter has missed because she had been unable to leave her husband. As if the beatings and the pain hadn't been enough, which they had, realizing what her daughter had missed prompts Carol to promise herself that she will never go back to Ed, never let herself be caught in a relationship like the one she had with her hopefully soon to be ex-husband. Never again.
"We have executed the dolly mission!" She hears Ezekiel declare from behind her.
She is surprised to find how much they've piled on the cart in the small amount of time she had been looking away; there are dolly nappies, clothes, a bed, and a stroller all ready to be purchased.
"Lookie Mama!" Sophia's voice is a little strained so Carol quickly turns to look at her. She's carrying a box almost as big as herself in which a baby dolly was nestled, surrounded by tiny toys and a certificate of birth. The dolly is beautiful; with its dark curls and chocolate skin, very much like Ezekiel's. "My Dolly!"
"She desired that one, I swear I didn't make her chose it," Ezekiel assures her. She can sense in his voice that he's worried.
"My dolly!" Sophia repeated to assure her mother she had chosen the skin color of her doll. Carol doesn't doubt that her daughter had chosen it. It is obvious that she idolized Ezekiel and now that they were going to live with him for an indefinite amount of time, Sophia wants to feel like she belongs. The way that she can do that is to have a dolly that resembles Ezekiel. It didn't bother Carol at all, in fact, it made her proud of her daughter and of the caring and tender heart her daughter possesses.
"She's beautiful, just like you!" Carol praises her daughter's choice before helping Sophia place it in the cart. Sophia quickly raises her arms to be picked up and Carol doesn't hesitate to bend down and hoist her on her hip, giving her a kiss on the cheek which makes Sophia giggle. Delighted by her mother's show of affection, Sophia frames Carol's face with her hands and peppers her whole face with sloppy kisses before giggling when her mother tickles her sides.
After calming down Sophia and placing her once more on the seat in the cart, Carol starts moving away from the toy area. "Is there anything else you require?" Ezekiel asks them.
Both Carol and little Sophia shake their head.
"Anything you might desire?" He asks.
Sophia giggles but quickly loses herself to her dolly, whose box is carefully balanced beside her, as she shows her the tiger plush. Carol, for her part, shakes her head once more. "Nothing else, you've been... you've been very giving already. I don't think I'll ever be able to repay you."
"Nonsense." Ezekiel once more denies her desire to pay back his kindness. "You and Sophia deserve this and so much more. I wish I could lavish you with all that you deserve but I'm afraid that if I do you will run away, scared."
Carol chuckles before rolling her eyes at him. "You don't scare me, or Sophia, I don't think we'd ever be afraid with you."
Ezekiel grins, showing how much her words have pleased him. He fiddles with his fingers for a bit, trying not to look as touched as he suddenly is, before pushing the second cart along. "I have plenty of food at home, nothing special but enough to feed us for a fortnight, unless there is something special you wish to pick up."
In an instant both Sophia and Carol stop what they are doing to turn to look at Ezekiel. He raises an eyebrow in surprise at having caught both of their attention with the promise of a special treat. Their reaction and reply will be something he will recount for a very long time, engraved in his mind's eye for an eternity; both of them grin, a single thought in their mind which he knows they will quickly voice. Unanimously, and without turning to look at each other, they declare firmly. "Chocolate."
"I will not take your bed. Sophia and I can sleep on the sofa."
His home is nothing like she would have imagined it. Just like he said, it is in the outskirts of the city where the land in which houses stand is bigger and greener than the rest of the city. It is not a cabin, at least not seen from the outside, but inside it is as rustic and cozy as one, decorated mostly in dark browns, dark greens, and metals. It is also quite obvious that a man lives alone in the house because even though it is not messy at all, it's still very practical. There is a big fireplace in the living room which no doubt adds to the coziness and which automatically makes her want to curl up in front of it with a cup of hot chocolate. His couches are big, fluffy, spacious and obviously made to fit his rustic decor. The table and chairs, just like the sofas, are rustic and made out of thick wood. His kitchen isn't huge but spacious enough and as soon as she sees it she's already planning a dinner to thank him for everything he has done. It's sparsely decorated, but from what she can see each and every picture hung or displayed is of him holding or standing by an animal; things as normal as horses, rabbits, and dogs and more exotic things such as giraffe's, tigers, lions, and even a gorilla.
He is an animal caretaker through and through.
The rest of the house is decorated in the same way, from the bathroom to his bedroom where they were currently discussing who is going to sleep in the bed and who is going to take the sofa.
Carol insists on sleeping on the sofa with Sophia cuddled against her.
Ezekiel insists she and her daughter should take the bed.
"Up!" Sophia begs as she stretches her arms up to her mother, one hand holding her plush tiger and the other holding the newly unwrapped dolly. As soon as Carol picks her up she's requesting to go on the bed.
"While the sofa is comfortable, I can attest to it, the bed will be much better for both you and Princess Sophia. More space."
"But it's your bed," Carol argues as she places Sophia on the mattress. Sophia scampers to the pillows right away and distracts herself by introducing her tiger to her dolly, complete with baby talk and tiger sounds. "We are already taking over your space. I don't want to take over your bed as well."
"My mother taught me better. She would roll in her grave if she were to ever find out that I slept in a big, comfortable bed while a woman and her child slept on the sofa." Carol scrunches up her face which prompts him to chuckle. "I am not sexist." He assures her. "But my mother was well ingrained in her beliefs and she will find a way from beyond the grave to let me know she's displeased with me. I'd rather not tempt her."
"I can't," Carol says, shaking her head. She turns her back to Sophia and sits down on the corner of the bed. She can't help but take a deep breath and slowly release it as she prepares to talk. "I'm very grateful Ezekiel, I really am. Sophia and I have never had as much as you got us today, and I will forever be grateful for it, but we truly will be fine on the sofa."
Ezekiel joins her by the bed, their shoulders and arms pressed together. "You've suffered enough." He whispers to her, placing his hand on his knee, palm up, offering his touch if she wanted it.
She doesn't hesitate and slips her hand into his. "Sleeping on a sofa is hardly suffering."
"It is when you wake up aching and groaning in pain after spending a night in it when a bed is readily available."
She shakes her head at him, the side of her lips curling slightly into a smile even as she tried to suppress it. He gives her hand a little squeeze. She turns her face towards him, her eyes sweeping over his face, settling for a second on his lips. The sudden desire to kiss him runs through her but she suppresses it and turns away though she doesn't take her hand away from his.
"The friend you mentioned... the lawyer... Do you think she really will help me?" She hates sounding so dependent, so afraid that everything will fall around her, but the fact is that she is dependent on him and his charity for the time being.
"Michonne?" He asks her.
Carol nods as she turns to look at him once more, her eyes pleading him for answers that he still doesn't have, not until he talks to his friend. "Yes. Do you think she'll take the case pro-bono? I... I obviously don't have money to pay her but I do plan to get a job soon, I'll look everywhere I can, maybe then I can pay her."
"I don't think she'll even consider you paying her for this." He answered truthfully. "But I am certain that she will help."
"The divorce and Sophia's custody?"
"And an order to keep him away so he can't get near you or Sophia."
Carol bites the inside of her lip. She knows that if he does find them, if he gets close enough to her and to her daughter, he will no doubt kill them. She doesn't plan to give him the chance to do so but she has to admit she hardly thinks an order will keep him away. "He's not going to follow it, Ezekiel, not if he finds us."
"Then he won't find you. We can find you a job, get you on your feet. You are welcome to stay here as long as you need, as long as you want, until you are steady and if you want to leave then we can find you and Sophia a home."
"It just seems... it all seems so good to be true. You meet us and then suddenly we are away from Ed and starting a new life and..." A sob that comes completely out of nowhere, slams into her. She doesn't know why it happens but it steals her breath for a second, makes her stutter and flusters her. Ezekiel tightens his hold on her hand, grounding her. "I'm scared that it is all too good to be true and Sophia will be... hurt."
"Sophia won't be hurt, you won't let it, I won't let it either." He assures her. "I will speak to the director of the zoo, maybe we can find you a job there, you won't have to be exposed while looking for a job and running into him."
It sounds like a good idea to her, perhaps a little bit of a dream but working at the zoo, having him near to assure Sophia and her, sounds like something she can live with. "Remember... he doesn't know the city, doesn't know the community. I do. That's an advantage... an advantage I will use to its full extent to help you for as long as you want me to help."
"Is forever too much time?" She asks in a moment of weakness in something between a tease and truthfulness.
He gives her a tiny chuckle, his chest jumping with the effort. What he says next takes the very breath from her lungs. "Forever sounds perfect enough if that's what you need and want."
She gives him a shy smile, thankful he didn't call her crazy or run away screaming from the huge responsibility he must feel. She presses her free hand over their intertwined fingers and gives it a gentle squeeze. Leaning on his side, she presses her head against his shoulder and slides her hand upward, securing against his arm. It's only a couple of seconds but she feels like she could stay there forever; protected, secure and, dare she say it, happy.
A tiny snore interrupts them moments later. They pull apart and turn to look towards the area of the pillows where they had last seen Sophia. Carol can't help but giggle as she sees her daughter surrounded by pillows, a dolly under one arm and the tiger under the other. She's sprawled right in the middle of the bed, fast asleep without a care in the world. Carol realizes she's never seen such calmness in her daughter's features as she sleeps, but instead of feeling bad about it she finds peace in the knowledge that calm is now an option that she will fight to keep in her daughter's life.
"I guess that settles it." Ezekiel declares. He turns to look at Carol and gives her a triumphant smile. "The sofa it is for me."
With her daughter having decided where they would spend the night by falling asleep right in the middle of Ezekiel's bed, Carol cannot try and persuade him to let her sleep on the sofa, so she can't do more than give him a nod. He rocks back and forth on the heal of his feet before letting out a nervous laugh which makes her blush. This is new for both of them and a little awkward, she doesn't fault him for not knowing what to do.
"I'll go get the pajamas." She ends up stammering as she starts moving towards the front of the house. It takes her a couple of minutes to find the bag with the pajamas but once she finds them she pulls them out and makes her way back to his bedroom. As she walks in she catches him finishing rearranging Sophia, whom he has transferred from laying on top of the sheets so that he could pull back the sheets. Carol smiles and continues on her way without a word, as if it was the most normal thing they were doing, pulling out the tiger pajamas and her own set of red clothes. She works quickly on changing a sleeping Sophia then with Ezekiel's help, she tucks her in.
Ezekiel leans down and presses a kiss on Sophia's forehead before whispering. "Sweet dreams, sweet princess."
Carol cannot remember a single time Ed had taken the time to tuck in their daughter, much less call her something as sweet as 'princess'.
Sophia mumbles in her sleep before pulling her doll and tiger tighter to her chest without even opening her eyes. She settles right away, leaving Carol and Ezekiel in silence, once more wondering what they should do.
It is Ezekiel who takes the lead this time, turning to her and approaching her slowly, giving her ample time and space to move. Carol doesn't. "I'm going to give you a kiss on the forehead, I have it on good authority that they bring the best of dreams."
Carol leans her head down, the bottom of her chin pressing against her chest. She can feel his breath against her skin as he nears her, then the soft press of his lips and the tickle of his beard. He takes a couple of seconds before pulling back. "Sleep tight and sweet dreams, milady."
"Sweet dreams." She whispers back.
She slides into the bed beside Sophia, her body turned towards her daughter. She looks so serene in her sleep, though she still keeps her hold on both of her toys. She can't help but smile as Sophia suckles on her tongue, her little cheeks moving with her efforts. She smooths a hand over her daughter's forehead, pushing away the random strands of strawberry blond hair from her forehead. The sprinkling of freckles on her daughter's cheek and nose makes her want to play connect a dot as she has done so many times to soothe her little one. She stops herself because this time Sophia doesn't seem to need it.
"This time it will be different, sweat pea." She whispers. "Mama promises."
She turns slightly on the bed, her face now towards the the ceiling.
"What?" She whispers in astonishment as she notices the constellations that are hand-drawn on the dark ceiling. Of course, someone like Ezekiel would have night constellations so he could see them whenever he wished. She muffles her laugh in fear of waking Sophia then snuggles down on the mattress, the blankets pulled up to her chin.
For the first time in years, she is calm and fearless, not wondering if she will wake up in the middle of the night to Ed's torture or his anger. For the first time, she doesn't have to fear something will happen to her daughter while she sleeps, unable to protect her, she doesn't have to force herself to stay in some type of consciousness so she'll catch the smallest sound of her husband leaving their bed or her daughter's door opening. For the first time, she sinks into the mattress and closes her eyes with a smile on her face.
For the first time, she simply sleeps.
