Small TW - This chapter briefly touches on themes of loss. So if that's a subject to which you're sensitive, please be warned.
15—Everyday
With the school's day having ended, and the activities after having concluded, Fujimura's return home is a foregone conclusion.
After letting herself inside, the first thing she notices is the aged gentleman lazing idly across the floor in front of their television, remote in hand, flipping absently through each channel as he hunts for something worth watching.
"Evening, Grandpa."
Of course, she recognizes him immediately.
Even if his hair wasn't worn in its ever-present smartly cut flat top, and he wasn't dressed in his yellow and black striped kimono, it would be impossible for her to mistake this man for anyone but.
She glances over his shoulder at the screen, showing a warm smile as she gives a hearty wave.
"Hm… Evening, cub," he mutters in a gruff tone, waving over his shoulder before refocusing on the TV and his endless hunt for something worth his time. "Girl's laying down. Ever since before you left to go back to that school. Thought it best to let her rest…"
He sighs, shaking his head.
"Heard from my bud back at the station… Can't believe it. What made you want to look after her, anyway?"
"Ah, that…" Fujimura stares at the TV for a second, then looks back over at her grandfather. "Actually, it was Shirou's idea. I was surprised when he brought it to me, but he wanted to do it himself."
"Eh? The kid's idea?" The channel-flipping stops, and the gentleman sets the remote down. "Interesting. So he came to you with it, and what?"
"Grandpa, he's far too young for such a thing." She sighs, shaking her head. "But I liked his spirit when he brought the idea to me. And both our houses are so big, so I saw nothing wrong with it. And I do feel for the child…"
"Well, it'd be hard for any sane person not to…" he mutters, staring down at the remote, tracing a path with his eyes between it and the TV. "So what now? You here to pick her up, I'd wager?"
Fujimura nods. "I thought we'd go pick out something she might like for dinner."
"Sounds reasonable. You'll be back late, I'm guessing?"
"Not too late, I'm hoping. Itchi-chan will need her rest."
"Right… Well, she's currently resting in your room, so…" Finally, irritated with what's on the TV, some news cast with just more bad news, the old man grabs the remote and flips the channel again. "Just try not to wake me if I'm down when you get back."
"Sure thing, grandpa." She kneels down and pecks his cheek. "And thanks for today as well."
He offers no reply but a small grunt as he continues hunting for something worth watching.
As Fujimura slips into her room, she spies Shizuka, still dressed as she was in the gray shirt and blue-jean overalls, her jacket crumpled at the foot of the bed. Curled under her blanket, facing the wall, head on her pillow, she sleeps restlessly, letting out a few soft, intermittent moans.
Quietly, the teacher looks her over, watching as she fusses until the moment seems right. On finding what feels like the best chance, she shakes her shoulder gently.
"Itchi-chan?"
Shizuka rolls toward her, rubbing her still-closed eyes before blinking up at her.
Everything stays fuzzy for a moment before clearing up, and a few wet streaks run down the sides of her face.
Fujimura reaches down with her finger and wipes them away.
She must've been having a bad dream… Nothing surprising about that.
Sadly smiling, she stares down at her.
"I'm going shopping for supper. Would you like to come along?"
The girl stares up at her blankly, her mouth pressed in a fine line, and gives a slight nod, brightening Fujimura's smile into something more cheerful.
"That's good. I was thinking I'd let you pick out what you'd like to eat."
Shizuka drops from the bed, then grabs her coat.
Before they make their way to the door, Fujimura kneels down.
"I just want you to know that this is a safe place for you, Itchi-chan." Gently, she pats the girl's shoulder. "So if you ever want to talk about anything, you can talk to me about it, and I'll listen, okay?"
The girl turns her blank stare from the door toward the teacher, and some light seems to return to her eyes, which quickly grow damp in the corners. She wipes at them as she blinks them closed, then gives a nod more defined than the one before.
It's hard for her to know what to say.
The last thing she remembers from that morning is seeing her mother's face, the officers holding her back, trying to keep her from seeing as she watched her being covered up.
The same image she saw in the moments before she woke up.
She wants to speak about it, but she knows if she tries, she'll probably break down.
Eight is a tender age for anyone, but even more for someone having suffered what she's been through.
As they make their way out, Fujimura stops by the door, tilting her head when she spots two rolled up posters leaned against the wall by the door.
Smirking, she takes them both as Shizuka looks on curiously.
Their trip to the store takes longer than it would have otherwise, with them having to walk since the yellow hornet of a moped is still resting idly at Shirou's house. Once they've arrived, they spend a few minutes wandering the aisles aimlessly before Fujimura kneels down next to Shizuka.
"Go ahead and pick out what you'd like, Itchi-chan."
The girl looks up at her, then nods and turns her head to look at what's there.
As they meander through the store, they come to the meat section, where she points at some ground wagyu in clear plastic wrap and yellow styrofoam trays.
Fujimura tilts her head, then smiles and nods, reaching down and picking up the ground beef. It's all smiles until her eyes nearly bulge as they sweep over the price, but she quickly pushes that concern aside and sets a few in the cart.
"So, I'm guessing you like these as hamburger steaks?"
She looks down at the girl, who looks up and nods, wearing a smile.
Small, but it's there, and more evident than the one she'd shown earlier at the station, when Taiasu handed her that bite-sized ball of chocolate.
Though it's small, it still makes her heart twinge.
She's putting on such a brave face. I know it's not even been a day, but I hope she's able to talk soon. I don't know anything about these sorts of things, but I imagine the sooner she does, the better…
"Alright." She frowns down at the packages in the cart. "But I don't know how to make that. Pretty sad, huh? An adult who doesn't even know how to make hamburger steak?"
Shizuka giggles, then grabs the teacher's dress and leads her around the store.
By the time they've finished, the cart is laden with everything she suspects they'll need. A single yellow onion, a bottle of canola oil, a half kilogram of ground wagyu, half as much ground pork, some panko breadcrumbs, a small carton of whole milk, and a single serving size bottle of red wine.
As Shizuka points out the salt and pepper, Fujimura shakes her head.
"I'm sure they have those at home. That, too, Itchi-chan." She chuckles as the girl points toward a small container of nutmeg.
They finish the trip with a small container of ketchup, a pack of unsalted butter, and tonkatsu sauce.
With everything they need in hand, they head to the checkout.
Each item is scanned, and everything feels fine until they get to the beef and pork. When those numbers get added in, Fujimura can feel the bottom drop out of her stomach.
I wonder if I can put in for a voucher at the station…
She heaves out a deep sigh as she reaches into her wallet to pay the man, while her purchase is loaded into some cloth sacks.
With those in tow, they head out and make their way to Shirou's place.
It's not far, which is good since they're hoofing it, and Shizuka keeps a firm grip on Fujimura's green dress.
"I wonder…"
As they walk, she muses out loud.
"I don't think we've ever had it, but I bet Sakura still knows how to make it." She looks down at Shizuka, walking at her side, to see her leaning her head, staring up with curious eyes. "Ah, Sakura's a friend. She's also a great cook."
She smiles down at her, then looks forward again.
Every few seconds, she has to stop herself from asking something that could prove painful.
Otherwise benign questions.
Things like 'So, did you have this a lot at your home?'
Of course, I can't ask that… Her home was destroyed.
It's a completely one-sided conversation as they make their way through the streets, the sidewalks, and the small amount of foot traffic, with Fujimura doing the talking, filling the silence with stories about Sakura, how she came to become a member of their makeshift family, the big house they stay in which her family owns, and the boy who they let live there.
By the time they arrive, the sun is setting, painting the town in reds and oranges.
Fujimura searches briefly for her key, then stops, noting some light pouring out through the door.
"Sakura's home already. I should have guessed." She shows another smile as she nods down at Shizuka. "Well, let's go introduce ourselves, shall we?"
The girl looks up with a still-worn small smile, prodding at her lower lip, and nods.
Sakura's entire day passes in a blur.
A day which pales when compared to what transpired that morning. Had anyone asked her about it, she'd likely have a troublesome time answering them honestly, as it's come and gone like the wind, leaving little of substance.
All she can recall is the all-encompassing grin she'd worn, drawing a few curious stares, until well after her face lacked the strength to bear it.
Even the walk home would have been completely unremarkable, were it not for her silent, unseen guardian pulling her back as she nearly steps off the curb at the intersection, not seeing the speeding vehicle, the driver of which having not seeing her, either.
"Ah—!"
With a yelp, she's shaken from her reverie, both by the car, and the force with which she's pulled back. For Rider being so quiet throughout the day, at least as far as Sakura can remember, and for her being so distracted with the events of that morning, she's all but forgotten about her.
'Rider… Thank you. That was too close.'
'It was. Are you alright?'
Unspoken, but sounding in her mind, Rider's tone contains a hint of concern, and Sakura gives a slow, solemn nod.
'I think so, yes. Sorry… I've been distracted.'
She stops at the intersection, drawing a breath and trying to ground herself, then checking both ways before crossing.
'Clearly. I've felt it all day long.'
The entire day, Sakura's limerence has poured through their link, continuing to muddle Rider's feelings, elevating her confusion.
Each time she blinked her eyes behind that mask, images from Sakura's mind, usually of the boy with the flaming red hair, flooded into hers.
Though sometimes, her own thoughts would superimpose over them, leading to more confusion and uncertainty.
But the one thing that seemed missing was the sharp irritation she felt that morning.
'So, are you still upset?'
'Upset?' Sakura's brow arches upward as she looks to her side. 'Over what?'
'What happened this morning? With that person… Taiasu? Taiasu Taruko?'
'Oh…'
In truth, she's paid him little concern beyond the few times her mind deigned remind her to make certain he'd caused no ruckus.
Thinking about what she recalls brings with it a sharp prick of the feelings from that morning, but the anticipation of the rest of the day, and possibly the next, soothes it like a balm.
She's not past the lunacy of his actions, but she is beyond feeling it necessary to dwell on them.
'I'm not sure, to be honest. What he did still baffles me, and when I think about it, I do feel frustrated, but with everything he said… Well, it's as they say. 'All's well that ends well'. I think it would be a waste of energy to stay angry at him.'
'I see… That is a prudent way to view it. And hopefully, he's learned to be more careful.'
Sakura's smile that had fallen away, as if having been hit by that car, returns, and with it, a hint of curiosity.
Except for that morning, and right now, Rider had been silent the entire day.
So why she's chosen now to speak, and about what happened that morning piques Sakura's interest.
And giving her mind something to focus on while they walk should help prevent her absently walking into traffic.
'So why are you asking about that, Rider?'
'Curiosity, mostly. Though I was also hoping we might see him again. That would prove difficult if you were harboring ill feelings toward him.'
'Really?' Her small smile narrows into a surprised circle. 'You want to see him again?'
The circle squishes into another sort of grin as she recalls his loose lips, letting slip his thoughts last night, and she lets out a small giggle.
'It's nothing like that, Mas—Sakura.' She can almost hear the sigh in her voice. 'I simply find him interesting. Fascinating, really…'
'Uh-huh. If you say so, Rider.'
Beyond that, their discussion contains little of substance, but serves well in keeping Sakura's feet firmly on the ground until they arrive at Shirou's house.
Standing in front of the door, she fishes out the key and prepares to slip it into the lock. As she stares down at her hand, she blinks a few times, then pats at her face, which has grown stiff for still holding that eye-catching grin.
Tonight… I'll be staying here tonight…
That thought, which should widen her grin, instead seems to sap its strength, turning it down into a worried frown.
But is it really okay…? For me to stay here?
She shakes her head, trying to free her mind from her doubtful thoughts and concerns, turns the key in the door's lock, and slides it open.
Leaving her shoes at the door, she makes her way to the kitchen, then into the refrigerator, trying to decide what would serve well for dinner.
Nothing within catches her attention, and she's about to resign herself to a trip to the store to see what strikes her fancy when the door to the living room behind her slides open.
A loud voice calls from the doorway, causing her to turn.
"Sakura-chan! Did you start dinner yet?"
She takes a few steps into the living room to see Fujimura standing in the doorway, carrying a few cloth sacks, a couple rolled up posters, and an eager look of expectation on her face. She moves toward the table and sets the two posters beside it, then looks up, waiting for Sakura's reply.
"Fujimura-sensei? No, not yet… I was looking through what we have, but couldn't decide." Her eyes track down to the sack in her hand, and she tilts her head. "Did you have an idea for something?"
"Not me, but… well, before that, come out here for a moment!" Giddily grinning, she takes a few steps from the doorway. "There's someone I have to introduce you to."
"Someone to introduce…?"
Sakura stares curiously as Fujimura brings Shizuka around.
"Sakura-chan, this is Shizuka Itchi. I'm looking after her for a while."
Small surprise widen's Sakura's eyes as she moves around from the kitchen, closing the refrigerator behind her, to greet the new guest.
"Looking after her, Fujimura-sensei?"
She nods. "I'll explain in the kitchen. But first, can you take these out there? Oh, and do you know how to prepare hamburger steak?"
Sakura blinks at the bags she's handed, her mouth narrowed into a small circle as she nods slowly, confirming the teacher's suspicions.
"It was one of the first things I learned when Senpai started teaching me…"
Dazed, she turns and shuffles into the kitchen to set the ingredients down.
While she does that, Fujimura finds the TV remote, grabs a floor pillow for the girl, and flips on the TV. She scans the channels, quick to switch from any news programs, until she finds some harmless-looking comedy show to settle on.
"Sit here, Itchi-chan. I have to talk with Sakura for a minute, then I'll introduce you."
The girl turns her head and nods.
Her gaze then falls to the table in the living room, moving toward the small tin of rice crackers left out for guests.
Fujimura follows her stare, then slides the tin over.
"Help yourself to those. I'm not sure how long it will be before dinner's ready."
She smiles up at her, then nods, reaching toward the tin and taking one of the plain crackers for herself, which she munches on as she turns her attention to the bright colors and loud noises coming from the television.
Satisfied that Shizuka is squared away, Fujimura slips into the kitchen, where Sakura is sorting through the ingredients they brought.
With each one, she smiles, frowns, or sighs, depending.
Much of what was purchased is redundant.
The eggs, wine, breadcrumbs, milk and canola oil, specifically, but they should still be able to find use for the perishables before they expire.
"So do we have what we need, Sakura-chan?"
Fujimura leans in, watching closely as Sakura works like a machine, dividing up everything before turning and nodding.
"More than enough. I'd say we have enough for at least two for everyone."
She looks over into the living room toward the girl, then over at Fujimura, asking the unspoken question with her eyes.
The teacher catches her stare, then nods sadly and whispers.
"You probably saw on your way to school, right? The house that was broken into?"
Sakura nods slowly, then waits for her to continue.
"Well…"
She swallows hard, feeling her chest constrict.
It's a hard thing to say, but it has to be said.
"That girl's entire family… She's all that's left. Shirou actually put the bug in my ear. He had this ridiculous idea about looking after her, but he's just a student. But he's got this…" She frowns thoughtfully, searching for the right words. "Irritatingly contagious tenacity, I guess? The way he was made me want to do something, so… I'll be looking after her for a while."
Sakura's eyes widen with each word, her mouth a perfect ring of stunned surprise.
"Senpai…? He wanted to look after her?"
Fujimura nods. "Yeah. Crazy kid… But his heart was in the right place."
As she turns her purple eyes from the teacher to the girl sitting at the zataku, her mouth flattens, then lifts into a beaming smile.
Yes. I'd say that's definitely true.
"She's not talking yet." Fujimura goes on. "But that's not surprising. Nobody knows what she's seen. I don't have the details, and I don't want to force them out of her. I just let her know she can talk to me when she's ready. Until then, we'll just do the best we can."
"So, these are for her?"
Sakura gestures at the ingredients, and Fujimura nods.
"I asked her to pick out what she'd like, and she led me all over." She pulls out her wallet and stares at it mournfully. "I didn't think something so simple could be so spendy…"
Sakura lets out a tittering giggle. "Well, beef is a pretty popular commodity. I'll get started on this, so—"
"Just a second, I still need to introduce you guys!" Fujimura pouts as she complains. "I just wanted to prepare you first. I've had a hard time watching what I say. I don't want to remind her of anything bad or upset her, and I didn't want that from anyone else, either."
"Ah… I see."
Sakura nods thoughtfully, then lets herself be pulled into the living room where Shizuka sits staring vacantly at the TV, having just finished her second cracker and now reaching for a third.
"Itchi-chan?"
Behind her, Sakura and Fujimura stand quietly, waiting for her attention. At hearing her name, she turns her head and looks up.
"This is Sakura." She gestures toward her. "The one I told you about on our way over. Sakura, this is Shizuka Itchi."
Properly this time, she formalizes their introduction.
"She'll be preparing dinner, since I'm such an unreliable adult."
Shizuka lets out another giggle while Sakura has to suppress a disrespectful eye-roll.
She can't deny the measure of truth in that statement, but this latest development seems to show at least some growth on her part.
It takes a full hour and a half for everything to be ready.
The most tedious part is waiting for the prepared hamburger steaks to be ready to cook, since they have to sit in the refrigerator for a half an hour once prepared.
While she waits for that, she thinks back on what pairs with it best, and settles on the more traditional rice and miso soup.
Hmm…
She sighs, looking over the stove where the pan she'd used to saute the onions still sits.
The problem is that the miso has to be served fresh, and there's still plenty of dashi stock left behind, as should be the case in any self-respecting kitchen where miso soup is a commonly prepared dish, so preparing the soup should take almost no time at all.
In fact, it should be done dead last, since I can just load the rice cooker…
Some time is spent preparing the remaining ingredients for the miso soup, cutting up the rest of the yellow onion, the other half of which was sauteed and mixed into the wagyu and pork, along with the spices, milk, egg and panko.
As she finishes cutting the turnip for the soup, there's still a sound ten minutes left on the timer she set for the meat to chill.
All she can do is bring out the silken tofu from the refrigerator and let it rise to room temperature so it doesn't chill the soup, and let the wakame soak to soften it up.
Now I just have to wait…
With nothing left to do, she lets slip another deep and worried sigh as she looks into the living room.
Preparing the meal has helped her avoid what's been troubling her, which comes to her mind as she stares into the living room.
Particularly, at her seated teacher, whose hand is currently running through the young girl's brown hair.
I don't know what to say to her… I'm not a stranger to loss, but I don't even know what she's dealing with. And she's so young…
Resigned, Sakura shuffles out in her pink apron, trying to draw no attention to herself as she sits opposite the two.
Unfortunately, it's a commercial break, and just her appearance serves as a distraction.
Shizuka looks across the table at her, and Sakura can only pretend not to notice for so long before she's forced to turn her head and acknowledge.
It's a long, awkward, silent exchange of stares before she finally settles on the most obvious thing she can think of to say.
"Um… Itchi-chan… I heard what happened…" Sakura forces an uncomfortable smile while her teacher stiffens with discomfort of equal measure. "I just wanted to say how sorry I was."
She gives a polite half-bow toward the girl, whose only response is a small head nod.
There's nothing in her eyes, or her unsmiling, unfrowning face to show the thoughts she's thinking, so Sakura goes on.
"And I know Fujimura-sensei can be… Well, you'll understand soon enough. But she's a good person. I'm sure she'll do a fine job looking after you."
With that, her smile relaxes into something more natural, and Shizuka turns her stare from Sakura toward the teacher behind her to see her also wearing a soft, natural smile.
Thankfully, the timer goes off, and Sakura has the perfect out to flee back to the kitchen, leaving the discomforting atmosphere behind her.
The rest of the meal preparation goes quickly, from cooking the steaks to preparing the reduced wine sauce, to getting the rice and soup ready, and soon the kitchen and living room is filled with the mixed smells of sweet, tart, and savory umami that her expertly hewn chef's skills bring from the meal's ingredients.
Everything is plated, bowled, and brought to the table, along with the reduced wine sauce for the hamburger steaks with a spoon for adding as much as is wanted to the dish.
As she sits down to her own plate, Sakura breathes out a hugely relieved sigh before doing just that, and adding a few spoonfuls of the sauce to her own dish, then digging in.
The only sounds heard as they partake are those of their chopsticks clicking against the dishes, and those which come from the TV.
After a few bites, Shizuka frowns down at her plate.
"It's… really good…" she mutters, her voice quivering. "Mom made this… a lot… But yours is better…"
Slowly, her eyes well as she stares down at the plate, her hands balled and shaking in her lap.
"It's not fair… She'll…" Glaring at the plate, she grinds her teeth as her tears run down her cheeks. "She won't… She'll never have a chance… to beat yours…"
Sakura stares wordlessly across the table at the girl, who looks at the plate like she wants to throw it across the room.
Fujimura slowly runs her hands through the girl's hair as she sniffles, her face wrinkling tightly before she finally breaks down, burying her face in the teacher's green dress, filling the room with the muffled sounds of her sobbing wails as she pours out an entire day's worth of grief-sodden tears.
