(Sometime in the last full week of the school year)

Thicket Valley wasn't supposed to be a town where things like this happened.

Other than a school, some houses, and a bucolic main street that on a good day teemed with all the action of a stagnant puddle, Thicket Valley was as dull a place as one could imagine; the very definition of flyover country. So naturally, when the students of RS 59 saw a fleet of state police cruisers speeding down the road with their sirens blaring, the day came to a halt…

…when the cruisers stopped outside the building, their lives changed forever.

"George Gordon Canker, you're under arrest for racketeering, embezzlement and corruption…"

Whatever semblance of order the day began with found itself tanked as each class of children beheld the spectacle of Principal Canker being frog-marched out of the school on that fateful day in early June. Some couldn't help letting out a whoop as the autocratic administrator continued his emasculated shuffle through the hallways which he once imperviously ruled over with an iron fist. With a final rueful glance at the school, he sighs defeatedly as the arresting officer escorted him to the back of the car and drive him away for good.

Unbeknownst to the RS 59 populace, their principal's undoing began with a series of scores from that year's Scholastic Conative Retention & Oratory Test of Upper Montana. The test belonging to Brandon Matthews raised some flags as RS 59 students always managed to be a model for mediocrity; with student scores always coming back as passable but undistinguished thus putting the school as a whole in a painfully average percentile. But now with that percentile drastically lowered, those in charge of analyzing the grades found it fishy how RS 59 always managed to coast by for all this time…and decided to get to the bottom of it. What they found was a decade long cheating scandal involving fudged grades, phony tutoring programs to keep the smarter kids busy, and countless other underhanded tactics too numerous to list here.

Yet before any actual justice could be served, Principal Canker somehow managed to escape from custody and flee for parts unknown. Some said he settled in Springfield while others claimed he took up residency in a town called Peach Creek where he was alleged to have familial connections. But whatever the case, RS 59 was in need of a new Principal for the upcoming school year.


(Later that day)

"…I guess it's Karma after all Lulu." Shanna mused as she and Lulu lounged about by the playground once school let out. "But still, who would've guessed that sus grades would be the old fossil's end?"

"Pfft. Right? That said, detention won't be all that fun anymore with him gone."

"'Front and center Missy so I can keep my eyes on you.'" Shanna said mockingly with a lustful grin for emphasis.

"'Why Principal Canker.'" Lulu cooed with facetious innocence before both girls cackled coldly.

"It was oh so obvious why he wanted me at the front of the classroom."

"My favorite was that look on that damned creep's face that one time you dropped a pencil…" Shanna said with a smirk as she slapped he hands together. "I SWEAR he was gonna explode right on the spot with that walk you did going back to your seat."

"What can I say? I'm a flirt." The redhead replied with a sly grin and batting of her eyes before recreating the aforementioned stroll.

Shanna couldn't help but return an equally sly grin to her friend with the crimson coiffure. After Niccolo and Sigmund, Lulu was the one person at RS 59 who didn't fill her with the uncontrollable urge to set the school on fire and cook a pallet of smores. In fact, on the right kind of day Shanna could say that Lulu made her feel the kind of rush one feels after doling out her first swirlie or pulling the fire alarm...

"YO SHANNA!"

The two girl's heads turn to see Sigmund and Niccolo bounding toward their spot on the field. Lulu scooted away from them, hoping to avoid whatever they may or may not have had in store.

"So…" Niccolo began. "A little birdy told me that you managed to make good on our bargain."

"Yep. Corkscrew's feeling pretty traumatized having to fend off Rhoda's advances every waking minute. And as a bonus, she finds a new way to abandon her dignity in her romantic displays; each more pathetically thirsty than the last."

"Well, never let it be said that Niccolo and I ain't men of our words." Sigmund interjected. "From this moment, you're one of us now.

"Really?" Shanna said beaming.

"Yep. Ya done good, Buddy boy." Niccolo confirmed holding out his hand.

The look of joy vanished on Shanna's face. Replaced now with a smug grin. With a snort of pride, she looked both men in the eyes and shook Niccolo's arm with vigor.

"You better bet your ass I did good."