The First Supper
Lily was tapping her foot nervously at a quarter to six when she heard a noise in the back garden. Throughout the past approximately 30 hours or so she had been building this dreaded dinner up in her head, desperately hoping there would be no bitter confrontations or outbursts from her, or anyone else. Fearing the stray cat had come to feast on her budgies again, Lily pushed out of the door into the garden to check. Instead she found a ruffled James Potter, sheepishly rearranging his glasses on his face as she stared incredulously at him.
"Evans," he said, nervously anticipating her reaction to him, and beginning to fidget with his hair, "I've… er… been sent to fetch you."
Lily, equally as uncomfortable with the situation as she thought he was, and furious at Marlene for sending James instead of herself, said diplomatically "Well we better, um, get going then."
Wondering why she hadn't seen it immediately, Lily spied a single broomstick which lay at James' feet. Horrified, she said "Is that how we're getting there?" failing to keep the nerves out of her voice. She had never flown before, past the few lessons in first year, and as she was never very good at it, she didn't have any interest in pursuing it further. No, better to focus on things she was actually good at, she thought.
"Sorry, er, I couldn't really think of any other way to, er, get us there. Neither of us can apparate yet and the Knight Bus is always crowded at this time of night, so I thought we could just fly? Sorry…" He trailed off, but was still anticipating the numerous insults that usually came with a conversation between them.
Appreciative of James' apologetic demeanour and pleased at his clear discomfort, Lily agreed, silently hoping he wouldn't do anything stupid like try to make conversation whilst they flew.
Clinging on to James' waist from behind, Lily tried not to seem too alarmed as they glided back to Potter Manor. Mercifully, Lily observed that James seemed content to just fly smoothly and not make awkward conversation, which she thought was the first wise decision he'd made in a long time, considering the state of their non-existent friendship. To be fair to what Marlene had claimed yesterday, Lily thought she may have possibly noticed the way his eyes seemed to have lost a little of their sparkle and his cheeks seemed a little bit more hollow since she had last seen him, and by the way he arms rested on his torso he had obviously become more lean and muscular. She almost felt sorry for him though, as he was clearly not himself, but she was perfectly happy to continue flying along in silence.
James, however, was having trouble concentrating with Lily's arms around his waist. He knew better than to try and broach the topic of the elephant in the room whilst they were hundreds of feet above the ground, and wanted to give her a little more time and space until she might potentially accept his apology, which he so desperately needed to give her. But her warmth spread from his back through his body and his heart began to flutter every time they hit a gust of wind and she held on a teensy bit tighter.
Once they had reached the grounds surrounding Potter Manor, James gave Lily a reassuring "Nearly there," having sensed that she may not enjoy flying all that much. Lily silently marvelled at the vast beauty of what she assumed was James' large estate and thought how lucky he was to live there.
Once they had reached the ground. Lily jumped off the broom with a curt "Thanks" and began to make her way inside. She was greeted with a bone-crushing hug from Marlene, and which she returned with a whispered "Traitor" in her ear, ensuring she knew the tongue lashing that was coming for her, for sending James instead of coming herself. Marlene had been expecting this reaction from Lily, and returned her glare with a grin and exclaimed "I'm so glad you're here! I wasn't sure you'd come", before linking her arm through Lily's and leading her to the house.
Sirius emerged from inside as they were coming through to the door, greeting Lily with a cheerful "Evans. Glad you could make it. Wasn't sure you would with this idiot controlling the broom.". Lily replied with a curt greeting of "Black." before continuing on inside the house with Marlene.
Sirius, like Marlene, was unsurprised at Lily's reaction to him, and continued outside to where James was packing away his broom in the shed. As was typical of their brotherly relationship, Sirius accosted James, gleefully asking if anything had happened on the ride over there.
"We didn't really talk. She just got on the broom and didn't say anything. I'm glad she didn't yell at me though, I was sure I was in for it." was all James would tell him, despite Sirius insisting there must have been some sort of conversation or apology that occurred. James simply assured him that "I'll apologise properly later tonight, I just want to make sure she's okay to receive it. I don't want to push her.". Sirius, unable to get anything more out of his best friend, traipsed back inside, James following along behind him.
Lily had never seen anything more ornately decorated nor beautifully designed than the architecture of Potter Manor. As with most old English houses, the high ceilings and enormous windows emphasised the grandeur of the house, and as Marlene dragged Lily through to the dining room, Lily was sure every single room they passed beheld the most expansive and decorative fireplaces she had ever seen.
The dining room was presented with equal splendour, and Marlene took Lily to sit beside her at the end of the table, just as Mr and Mrs Potter breezed into the grand room.
"You must be Lily, my dear! It's wonderful to finally meet you at last. I'm Euphemia." James' mother said, her warm smile and kind eyes causing Lily to instantly warm to her. She rose in greeting of this, and smiled cautiously back, "Yes, pleased to meet you."
James' father was similarly warm and splendid, greeting Lily with a cheerful "It's a pleasure to meet you, welcome to our home." and Lily decided they were the sort of parents that every child should have; supportive and loving, always believing in their children as if they were the most beautiful and precious thing on earth. Not that her own parents were in any way lacking, they just were so often unsure of how to deal with her and Petunia, and so left them to their own devices. Lily couldn't imagine Fleamont and Euphemia doing anything of the sort to James, and however much he exasperated her at school, it certainly seemed as though he was very loved.
"Ah, here are our two boys, late, as usual" Fleamont said by way of greeting the two boys who came to take their seats opposite Lily and Marlene. They each muttered hurried apologies, and then silently took their seats, taking care not to look at the red head opposite.
Lily threw a questioning glance towards Marlene at Mr Potter's referral to Sirius, who whispered "Sirius has been living with the Potters over the summer. James' parents treat him like their own and they certainly act like brothers.". Lily was surprised by this admission, knowing Sirius and James' families' opposing reputations as blood supremacists and opposers respectively, but tried not to show it on her face.
Fleamont sat at the head of the table closest to Lily, and once James and Sirius had taken their seats, the table folded itself into a third of its original length and Euphemia sat at the other head opposite her husband. Lily silently marvelled at the convenience of a magical home.
As if in response to her wonder, dinner simply appeared on the table. Various meats, vegetables and sauces now adorned the table, all of which smelled simply divine, and Lily joined the others who had already begun to tuck in.
"So, Lily, we hear you have a sister?" Euphemia asked gently as she served herself potatoes.
"Yes, she's two years older than me. But she's a muggle." Lily said, keeping her eyes on her plate and looking to keep her answers as brief as possible. She didn't want to delve too deep into her personal life, regardless of how kindly James' parents were. She didn't want to make the same mistake twice.
"And how have you been spending your summer holidays so far?" Euphemia continued, keen to find out even a little bit more about the girl she had heard so much about.
"Reading, mostly." Lily replied.
"And what do you like to read?" Fleamont joined in. "Fiction, non-fiction, biographies, poetry? You're welcome to read any books you wish from our family library any time you like." His kind eyes meeting Lily's, showing he was genuine with the offer.
"That's very kind of you. I prefer to read fiction, but I've also been getting ahead with reading for school this year." Lily said, opting to keep her response to James' father's offer noncommittal and scant.
Sirius snorted into his spoonful of peas at Lily's admission that she was getting ahead on schoolwork, which earned him a glare from Lily and a warning glance from the remainder of the others around the table, accompanied by a swift kick under the table from Marlene.
"Well, these rascals could take a leaf out of your book, Lily. Not an ounce of initiative between them. James' been in his room or on the quidditch pitch every day, and the other two have pretty much idled about, doing as they please. We've barely seen hide nor hair of them these last six weeks!" Fleamont said brightly, choosing to gloss over Sirius' brief indiscretion.
Lily simply smiled politely, and the rest of the meal continued much the same way, with polite but simple questions from Mr and Mrs Potter towards Lily, with the occasional input from Marlene or Sirius. James stayed quiet, mentally preparing for his apology to Lily later, and desperately hoping she would accept it.
At the end of the meal, all of the plates and dishes vanished as seamlessly as they had appeared, and Lily began to thank her hosts for such a wonderful meal, and reiterating her genuine pleasure in meeting them.
Leaving the 'crazy kids' to themselves, Fleamont and Euphemia departed the dining room arm in arm, pleased with the outcome of the meal and hoping they would see 'that delightful girl' again soon.
As Lily began to follow Marlene out the way they came, James softly caught her arm, momentarily stopping her but not with enough force to prevent her walking away if she so chose. Sirius and Marlene wisely slunk out of the room, sensing what he was preparing to do, and for once in their lives appearing not to be the busybodies he knew they were.
They were, in fact, listening just outside the door.
"Evans, I wanted to, no, needed to, apologise for what happened last term." He began quickly before he lost his nerve.
"No, Potter, I-" Lily tried to start but James stopped her.
"No, please hear this, I need to tell you." James continued, affirmed by a single nod from Lily, and by the fact that she made no move to leave. "I have treated you and Snape and many others awfully during my time so far at Hogwarts. And I am truthfully very sorry for that. And I'm sorry for egging Snape on that day, I knew it was wrong, but I was too much of a show-off to stop. And I'm sorry for teasing you and constantly being a nuisance and not respecting you when you told me to stop. I'm so sorry that my behaviour caused Snape to treat you like that, and I know if I'd acted in a better way he wouldn't have called you that awful, despicable name and I will be eternally sorry that he did. You were right that I was an arrogant toerag and an arse and egotist and a peacock, and I am ashamed of the way that I behaved for five years straight. Now, you don't have to forgive me, Merlin knows I don't deserve it, but I just needed to say all this to you Evans because I've been reflecting and trying to change and be better and treat people better, and I just hope that I can do better this year. And I know that words can't change what happened or earn your trust or anything, but I needed to at least tell you." He finished, exhausted after finally letting out everything that had plagued him over the holidays, gnawing away at his self-confidence over what had been the longest six weeks of his life, simply wishing he could express all this to her.
Lily saw it in his eyes that he was truly remorseful, and it was as if she witnessed some of the sparkle return to his eyes when she said quietly, almost in a whisper, "It's alright James, it wasn't your fault.". She wondered if his self-reflection was the cause of the isolation his parents had inadvertently spoken of at dinner, and the devastation Marlene had spoken of when she came to visit her yesterday. As much as she was loath to admit it, the old Potter wouldn't have sat through an entire dinner with Lily Evans sat opposite him, in polite silence without trying to interject with some joke or anecdote designed to make everyone laugh (and turn the attention of the table towards himself). Perhaps this was evidence of a new leaf he was beginning to turn over, but only time would tell.
After giving him a small, miniscule, tiny smile as a goodbye, Lily walked out the way she had seen Marlene go, only to find her and Sirius with their ears pressed against the hard Oakwood door.
Pretending as if Lily hadn't caught them eavesdropping, the two stepped back, and were instantly enthralled by two very interesting spots on the floor. Lily decided not to comment, simply raising her eyebrows, and strolling towards the door.
"Evans!" Sirius called out to her, unsure if she would even turn around. "I'm sorry as well…" he said gently, looking directly into her eyes, hoping she could read his sincerity in the brief statement.
Despite Sirius' reluctance to forge a friendship with Lily Evans, he was indeed apologetic about his part in the way everything had culminated, and wished that he could have prevented it from getting that far. His aloof demeanour all summer holidays had been hiding a niggling feeling that he should have, could have, done something differently so the situation didn't proceed as far as it had on that fateful day. Sirius' deepest wish was to prove he was different than the prejudices and hatred spread by his family – that was why he had left home and moved in with the Potters this summer, and he would be forever grateful that they had welcomed him with open arms and open hearts. Fleamont and Euphemia had treated him exactly as they did James, and he was emboldened by their faith and trust in him when his own family had always treated him in an opposite manner. His role in the 'Snape incident', as he had begun to call it, wasn't exactly evidence of his lack of hatred or antagonism towards those different to himself, and Sirius had already decided it was his mission this year to prove himself to be worthy of James' friendship, and the Potters' love.
A soft "Thanks," and a small smile was all Lily offered in return to his admission, but it was better than nothing, Sirius thought, having fully expected her to not accept his apology. Marlene gave him a reassuring look over her shoulder as she followed Lily out the door, offering to take her red-headed friend home herself, even if it was on the broom again.
Lily went to bed that night lighter and more content that she had in a long time, finally feeling as though she was ready and able to return to school in two weeks' time. Having finally put 'the incident' to rest, Lily slept better than she had in months, and dreamt of all of the adventures she and her friends would have when they returned to face their sixth year at Hogwarts.
