Title: Every Day Sucks

Summary: Kokoro continues her studies with Ao and her training with Masumi. She runs into a troubling girl and a troubling situation.

"The Nidaime Mizukage, Gengetsu Hozuki, carried on the Shodai Mizukage's principles. He was very similar to the Shodai Mizukage in the way he led the village," Ao said as he leaned against the wall. "The most prominent difference between the two is that the Nidaime was open to praising and talking to others no matter their village affiliation. He is most known for his infinite explosion ninjutsu and his giant clam summons. Moving on to the Sandaime Mizukage-"

"Wait," Kokoro interrupted as she startled and raised her hand. Sheepishly, she looked at Ao and waited for him to stop glaring at her and allow her to speak. She wasn't supposed to speak out of turn or without raising her hand and being called on first, but she was surprised at how fast Ao went over the Nidaime Mizukage. She thought he would have gone more in-depth considering it was a Mizukage he was talking about. In Konoha, they spent months talking about the Hokage's and everything they helped achieve in and for the village. Ao waved her on, so she continued, "That's all you're going to say about him?"

"Do you have a problem with that?" Ao asked.

"No," she said quickly. Then, she hesitated before she backpedaled and said, "Well, yes. I don't understand how you can just skim over the details of the Nidaime Mizukage when you took seven days to go over the Shodai Mizukage and all the rules, regulations, protocols, and other basic policies he put in place. Weren't you the one who told me knowledge is power, or something like that?"

Ao observed her critically for a moment before a small smile broke out across his face and he nodded his head. "Good," he said. "You're learning. I was still skeptical of training you to become a diplomat for our village, but I see that you have potential. If you didn't ask, I would have started teaching you about the Sandaime Mizukage. However, you understand that the more you know, the more you will know. Still, I advise you to wait until after I call on you to open your mouth."

Kokoro threw her hands into the air and said, "I'm the only student in this room. Why do I need to raise my hand? What if you move onto a different topic and you wait until after you're finished with the new topic to call on me? Then, I'll be stuck on the previous topic the entire time you ramble about the new topic, and I won't retain any of the information you gave me."

"Are you done?"

"Yes," she huffed out.

"Then I will continue," Ao said. "The Nidaime was a forgetful person and often forgot important things. It was due to his forgetfulness that Kirigakure implemented the Mizukage advisor position and began training the smartest shinobi in the village to become diplomats for the village. The Nidaime forgot too many important details, deals he made with other villages and daimyos. It's a wonder Kirigakure survived so long under his reign." Ao shook his head. "He was the strongest in the village, but many people considered him a bonehead. On top of his forgetfulness and strength, he was a bit two-faced and was often underhanded in his words. Still, he knew strength and skill when he saw it. His openness to talking to other foreign shinobi allowed other Kage to be comfortable around Kirigakure shinobi. Our relationship with other villages was strained, but the friendly aura he used around strangers helped ease some of that tension. Because the other Kage were able to put out a friendly front so as not to instigate war between the still newly-formed villages, the Nidaime was able to conceal his short temper.

However, once someone insulted him, he lost control. The Nidaime Tsuchikage made that mistake and ever since that mistake, the Nidaime Mizukage made it a point to be hostile towards him. Any time they crossed paths, they made it a mission to fight. It caused tension between Kirigakure and Iwagakure. Their hostility quickly trickled down to their subordinates, creating an inevitable war between the two nations. It was a bloody and terrible war that caused many casualties within our ranks and caused the death of the Nidaime and the Nidaime Tsuchikage."

"What happened right after their deaths?" Kokoro questioned. "Did Iwa back down immediately, or were there tensions due to their deaths?"

"The tension was a given as two important leaders had died in battle. Naturally, when a leader dies fighting an enemy, the hatred that leader held trickles down to their subordinates. Though inevitable, the fight of two people should not carry onto others and burden them. Unfortunately, the Sandaime had to bear their dispute. But, we will discuss that next week."

Kokoro groaned as she was ready to hear more about what happened.

"Now, as previously stated, the Nidaime's policies were built off of the Shodai's existing policies . . ."


"Are we going to start with katas again?" Kokoro asked in disinterest. Honestly, she was tired of doing them. She felt she had mastered them to the point where she didn't need to spend an entire training session on them. Could she use some more work with them? Absolutely. The time she spent with Masumi so far taught her that there was always room for improvement. Mastering a skill was a high achievement, but it wasn't the only thing that mattered. Execution of the skill was important, too, and that was something Kokoro struggled with. She didn't have the battle experience that allowed expert shinobi to use a skill on the fly.

"No, there is something else I want to focus on today. I think you've gotten marginally better since our first session with your katas." Kokoro cheered, causing Masumi to frown. "Don't think this means we won't revisit them. You can't not do something and expect to remember how to perform it perfectly after time has passed. That is why shinobi are constantly training even after their graduation and grasp of high rank."

"So, what are we focusing on today, then?" she asked as she swayed her feet back and forth. She was sitting on a tree branch comfortably. She liked the high advantage and the feeling of free movement it gave her. During her limited free time, she often found herself sitting in a tree, thinking about things that she usually avoided. It was peaceful sitting in a tree, alone. It felt like she had no expectations, no responsibilities. She could just exist. Of course, those times were short-lived. She'd get interrupted by people walking by and whispering about her or shouting at her to evacuate the area if she wasn't training or using the land. She still hadn't made any friends, and she knew she wouldn't make any for a while. People in Kirigakure were more closed-off than people in Konoha. They were very wary towards outsiders, and it was hard to enter a circle of friends when they didn't want you there in the first place.

Instead of spending time with people, she spent time with nature. She even got herself a couple of plants to tend to in the evening. It was actually therapeutic, in a way, and she wondered if that was why Gaara was so interested in plants and gardening. It would certainly help to calm even the most volatile person. She'd have to get access to a camera and take a few pictures to show him the next time she saw him.

"Today," Masumi started, "we are going to focus on your aim and your taijutsu. Before we do that, I want to introduce you to the possibility of training with weapons. It is a well-known fact that shinobi in Kirigakure utilize weapons, especially swords."

"Will I be practicing with a sword, then?"

"Do you want to learn how to handle a sword?" Masumi asked with a raised eyebrow. "If you do not wish to, then you don't have to. I'd rather you specialize in a weapon you like."

"So no matter what, I need to pick a weapon to specialize in?"

"Yes," Masumi said concretely. "Chakra is one of the most important tools we utilize as shinobi, but we have a limited supply of it. Some of us are lucky to have a large supply of it, but most are not. Most weapons don't require the usage of chakra. They can be a huge advantage on the battlefield."

"My grandfather wielded a tanto, and my dad is skilled in using one, too," Kokoro stated aloud. She wondered if she should just follow in their footsteps just this once. It wouldn't be too bad, and she could impress her dad the next time she saw him.

"Is that what you want?" Masumi asked seriously.

"I don't know," Kokoro answered honestly. "I want to be my own person, but on the other hand, I want to impress my dad and live up to-"

"Stop," Masumi interrupted sharply. "Don't do things to please others."

"But I just want the whispers to stop," Kokoro said as she sagged. She was tired of everyone whispering about her and her dad and her grandfather. She was tired of feeling the piercing stares on her back after coming back to the village from a mission. It was like they expected some dastardly news. It was especially worse since her dad was her team's captain. Double the trouble, double the disaster, double the failure. And it wasn't just the civilians either. There were jounin and chunin and even genin that believed the rumors stating her dad was a friend killer. Of course, that wasn't true, but they didn't know that and they assumed the worst. Those that didn't interact with her or her dad always steered clear of them. It was just as humiliating as it was painful.

"How will becoming just like your father make the whispers stop?" Masumi demanded. "Do you think the people in Konohagakure will celebrate once they find out there are two Kakashi Hatakes in the world? Do you think they'll finally give you some reprieve and celebrate your copied strength?"

"No," Kokoro said in a small voice.

"No, they won't," Masumi said over her. "They don't like you now, so what makes you think they'll like you any more five years from now?"

"But if I get stronger, then they'll have to see that I'm not a failure," Kokoro protested. "If I put in the hard work now, they'll all see how great I am, even my dad!"

"They will see what they want to see," Masumi said calmly. "You cannot dictate what other people do or think about you. The same goes for your father."

"Then what do I do?" Kokoro asked defeatedly. "I know I should try to create my own legacy - that's one of the reasons I agreed to come here - but I don't know if I'm strong enough to do it or even how to do it. I feel like I'm trying too hard to be different."

"You don't need to create an entire new identity. You will always be a Hatake, and you will always carry that name. But that doesn't mean you have to carry the first names that come with it, too. You don't need to carry the Kakashi name or the Sakumo name; you only need to carry the Kokoro name. You are Kokoro Hatake. Be a Hatake but also be a Kokoro. Do you understand?" Masumi asked.

Kokoro thought it over. It would take a while to change her thinking completely into one that only depended on what she wanted and her needs, but she could see the appeal in Masumi's words. And that's all she's ever wanted to be: just Kokoro Hatake. Kokoro looked up at Masumi and truly wondered what they went through to grasp an understanding such as the one they had. She mulled over the way they interacted with the Mizukage and the way they were so familiar with each other. She asked, "Are you by chance related to the Mizukage?"

"I am," Masumi said. "Mei is my cousin."

"Oh," Kokoro said lamely. "Is that why you know so much about this kind of stuff?"

Masumi hummed and said, "Indeed. Mei and I were stellar shinobi growing up. Both of us had great potential. However, Mei inherited the family's kekkei genkai and I didn't. She was praised by our family and other shinobi just for harboring such power. Eventually, I was put on the back burner. It hurt, I admit, and I still don't forgive my family for being such power-hungry vermin, but I got over it and realized I had my own strengths and potential. I didn't need to measure up to anyone else, especially someone I was so close to. I decided to find my true self and promised myself I would never go against it. I left the shadows they put me in and stepped into my own light. So, do you want to follow in the shadows of your family, or do you want to step into your own light, Kokoro?"

"I want to use a bokken."

"Interesting choice. Care to explain why?"

Kokoro shrugged before she said, "I want my main focus to be my ninjutsu. I want to learn how to wield a weapon, but it isn't my priority. I still have to work on improving my ninjutsu and my hand-to-hand skills, plus I have to work on coordinating with my ninken -"

"You have ninken? Why didn't you tell me?" Masumi demanded.

"I was waiting until we got past the basics. You wouldn't have let me train with them anyway."

"Do you always assume things about others?" Masumi asked with a raised eyebrow. Kokoro smiled sheepishly and apologized. "We could have trained them beside you, Kokoro. Ninken also require basic training, and they need to get used to their new environment."

"Do you want me to introduce you to them?" Kokoro asked excitedly. "I haven't gotten a chance to see them since before I left Konoha and they are so cute."

"I hope they are more than cute."

"They are well-trained, too!" she insisted. "We trained a little together before I left, and they have a good grasp of the basics. Promise!"

"Then it seems I need to meet them. We'll save the meeting for tomorrow, though. Today, I want to focus on your weapon of choice."

"Oh, right," Kokoro said as she focused again. "Well, I was thinking I could use the weapon as a backup in case I don't have enough chakra left or in case my opponent has a blade. I thought I could use it to stun more than kill, although with the right aim I could land a fatal blow. "

"So you want to use it as support rather than your main source of attack?"

"Yes! Exactly!"

Masumi hummed and thought about it before they nodded their head and accepted her response. "Okay, we can work with that. I will see what I can conjure up. Would you prefer a traditional bokken or are you okay with something with a bit of modifications?"

"I've never thought about it," Kokoro said truthfully. It would make sense that they'd have modified swords in Kirigakure. "I think I would like to start off with a traditional one before I get crazy with modified ones, just so I can get the hang of wielding it."

"That's fine. I will find one fit for you. Now, I want to see how good your taijutsu is."

"How will you be doing. . . that?" Kokoro asked as she eyed Masumi getting into a fighting stance. She sighed and said, "I have to fight you, don't I?"

"Correct."


Kokoro winced as her body protested against her movements. She knew fighting against Masumi would be hard, but she didn't think it would be that hard. She'd barely got a hit in, and when she did, Masumi recovered quickly and retaliated by throwing a rough blow back. She had bruises littering her body, and even though she stretched after her fight, her muscles were tight and in pain. But she had to get home. She still wasn't comfortable walking the streets of Kirigakure by herself. It was easier with Masumi next to her or Ao, but it was harder when she didn't have anyone to hide behind. She felt eyes linger on her as she walked and she couldn't help but to close in on herself.

"Look who it is," a childish voice said from behind her. Kokoro turned around and saw the little girl she had run into on her first day of training. She pursed her lips and crossed her arms over her chest. A few people lingered as they watched the interaction go down between the two. No one intervened or said anything; they just watched, waiting.

"What do you want this time?" Kokoro asked impatiently. She was too vulnerable out in the open and she really didn't want to deal with a bratty kid when she was ready to fall asleep.

"Nothing, just wanted to bother you," the girl said snootily.

"Well, I'm not in the mood. Why don't you go play or something," Kokoro grumbled out as she started to walk away.

"You think I have time for that?" the girl shouted. "You think I have enough security to do that?"

"What are you talking about? No one has security around here," Kokoro said in frustration. "You know what? Nevermind. I don't care about your words right now. All I want to do is get home and enjoy some peace away from prying eyes."

"You have the privilege for that, huh?"

"Look, I get that you all don't like outsiders very much, but I've been here for a while now. All of you should be used to me by now, even a snot-nosed brat like you."

"No, you look!" the girl yelled as she invaded Kokoro's space. "You don't know anything about what it's like to live here, so don't try to act like it!"

"Sure," Kokoro said as she dismissed the blue-haired girl. " All I'm saying is you could benefit from trusting others." With an angry screech, the girl lunged forward and gripped Kokoro's arm. She pulled the gray-haired genin toward her and started shaking her.

"You don't belong here, Konoha! You should have never come. After disrespecting my brother during the Chunin Exams, a Kirigakure shinobi, you have a lot of audacity to step foot in our village!"

Whispers surrounded them as the civilians and a few shinobi lingering about heard what she said.

"You Konoha shinobi are dirt beneath our shoes, you hear me?! I hope you never pass your classes and the Mizukage finally sees how useless you and your stupid kekkei genkai is!"

Kokoro grew nervous and threw the girl off of her. The milky-eyed girl fell to the ground in a heap and looked at Kokoro with disbelief riddling her eyes. The girl looked around at the lingering people and smirked before biting her lip. Her eyes began to water as she yelled, "She pushed me! Why would you push me?"

"What?" Kokoro asked in a confused manner. She looked around her as the whispers grew louder and people began to yell at her. "No, no, I wouldn't-!"

"You don't belong here!" a woman yelled as she went to help the girl up.

"Get out of here!" another person yelled.

"How dare you put your hands on our future!"

"Please, I didn't mean to," Kokoro pleaded as everyone shouted around her. She looked to the nearest shinobi and begged them to calm the crowd down, but they ignored her and left with a shake of their head.

"No one wants your Konoha politics here!"

"Save your friend killing ways for Konoha!"

She stumbled backwards as something solid nailed her in the forehead. She touched her head and looked down. At her feet was a rock and on her hands was blood. Another rock flew in her direction. Thankfully, she dodged this one, but she wasn't lucky enough to dodge the next one. Knowing it was time for her to get out of there, she fled the scene with tears in her eyes.


Gaara,

I don't know how long I can take it here. I thought it would be best for me and my future, but nothing is going right. No one likes me here. I don't have any friends. No one wants to talk to me. All they do is whisper when I'm around and avoid me like the plague. How am I supposed to serve a village that doesn't like me? How am I supposed to make friends? I should just leave. Maybe the Mizukage will let me go back to Konoha if I ask nicely.

I wish I could talk to you face-to-face. Your presence is calming, and you don't judge me for being me. You don't hold me accountable for things out of my hands, and you understand me more than anyone else. How are things going with you? I haven't heard much news outside of Kirigakure. My diplomatic sensei, Ao, doesn't think I'm ready to tackle modern politics right now. He refuses to let me know what's going on. He says I need to understand the history first before I can understand the now. It's frustrating. The whole point of me coming here was to be a diplomat and I can't even learn how to do that yet.

Training has gone quite well, but it's going so slow. How am I supposed to be ready for the next Chunin Exams if my sensei won't pick up the pace? We just got past katas and are just now starting taijutsu practice. And on top of still having to train my ninjutsu, my ninken, and my taijutsu, they want to teach me how to wield a weapon. There's no way I'll be ready! I've been working so diligently to be up to their standards, but it's all so much. I'm just so frustrated and angry and lonely. I hope you are doing better than I am.

Kokoro

I'm finally back! I will be updating this story regularly from now on. I'm thinking every week or every two weeks depending on the chapter and how busy I get. I am determined to finish this story by summer!