A/N: Your response to what I said in the previous chapter about what happened to me was quite overwhelming! Thank you so much for the PMs and reviews it really made me feel better and I always love talking to you so feel free to pop by, say hello.

I want you to know that I have talked to a few people that I trust, I won't be pressing charges because well... I was drunk there were other people there and despite having said no, slow down and I don't like that, I eventually let him because there was not much I could do. He was way taller than me (I am only 5'3) and heavier. My back already feels better, my lips are still quite torn and purple and swollen but healing, and the bruises are still present but I hope by the end of the month they'll be gone.

Flashbacks are just making me cringe, I feel disgusted and I had trouble sleeping only the day it happened.

Anyway I just wanted to let you know that I am okay, I am processing it and hoping for the best.

Now on to the chapter, enjoy!

"Yes, you do."

She wrapped one arm around her shoulders so they would both be covered by the umbrella. The blonde with shaky hands reached out and grabbed her belongings, no questions asked, not yet. She felt safe under the other woman's touch. She felt safe anywhere that wasn't a bench, in a dark street, while the skies were open and her entire body was on fire from all the pain.

"Ugh, fuck." She groaned after they had taken a few steps. Walking seemed to be quite a hard task for the petite blonde, with her ribs were giving her a hard time once again.

"I am so sorry honey, I know you must be in a lot of pain. My place is a couple of blocks from here, do you think you can make it or should I call for a cub?" The concern in her voice made Amanda feel bad, the last thing she wanted was to be a burden.

"No, it's okay, I can walk." She sniffled and attempted a small smile. No, she couldn't walk. She could barely stand but she was too proud to let the other woman know her pain.

But Olivia knew it already, she didn't need Amanda to put a voice to it. The hurt was written all over her face, her posture, the way she was walking, even in the way she was talking, not that she had done much of that whatsoever.

She sighed and carefully led them towards her building, praying to God that the other woman wouldn't bolt last minute, have a change of heart or that she, herself, would do anything that would make her feel the slightest bit uncomfortable.

"It's not very big but I live alone so it does the job." She said as she closed the door behind her.

The blonde was looking around, mesmerized by the beautiful decoration. The woman clearly had a great taste.

"It's lovely." She murmured shyly.

The warmth the apartment emanated lurked its way inside her soul and she felt better almost instantly. Though she was feeling uncomfortable. Not because she was inside a stranger's home but because her clothes were soaking wet and were clinging on her body. If she hadn't caught a cold or worse pneumonia, she would consider herself a lucky ass woman.

"You want to change, maybe have a shower?"

"If you don't mind. I am so wet." She chuckled but stopped half way through it. That had come out way dirtier than she had intended it to. "I... that was... I didn't mean-"

"Amanda, relax." It was Olivia's turn to laugh softly. "I know what you meant. Of course you can have a shower. Let me just give you towels and some clothes. Not that they will fit you but..."

"I have everything I need in the duffel bag, I'll just check if there is anything dry in there and let you know." She nodded with a smile and the other woman turned around and started pacing towards what Amanda guessed was the bedroom.

Thank God, most of her clothes were intact. She grabbed a pair of sweats a tank top and a cardigan, a pair of underwear and slowly, with a little help from the wall in front of her, managed to stand up.

"Okay, so here you go." Olivia handed her the fluffy white material. "Bathroom is at the end of the hall to your right, yell if you need anything."

"Thank you, Sergeant Benson." She let her gaze drop to the floor and started walking towards the bathroom.

"You can call me Olivia, you know." She heard the other woman saying from behind her. She turned to look at her and nodded.

"Thank you for everything, Olivia." She said and disappeared into the darkness of the hallway.

"Hey, I made some chamomile tea. Usually helps after long days." She put two mugs on the coffee table and sat down next to a dry Amanda, except for the hair that were wet but at least not from the rain.

"Yeah, I do it too sometimes. Thanks, you didn't need to go through all that trouble." She took the mug in her hands to warm them up a bit.

"Always a pleasure to help a lady in distress." Olivia snickered and was more than satisfied when she heard Amanda's laugh. An actual laugh. Not a chuckle or a fake smile. A laugh.

Progress.

"That makes me sound old."

"How old exactly?"

"Is this your way of asking about my age?"

"Maybe."

"Well, I am relatively young." Olivia's eyebrows shot up, clearly wanting, needing, the blonde to be more specific. "Gee, I am twenty eight." She almost spit out the tea in her mouth.

Twenty eight was young. Too young. Way younger than her.

"What about you? You don't have to say if you don't feel comfortable of course."

She was always comfortable about her age, her weight, herself in general not like many other women. Her figure might not be as it was a few years back, during her first years at special victims, but she didn't mind. She still liked her body even if many people considered it 'flawed'. To her it was just her, growing older. Is there anything more normal and beautiful than that?

"I... I am forty six."

"No. Shit."

Wasn't that a shock? She had been staring at this face that held such gorgeous features, that body, she had literally checked her out and she was willing to bet her life that the brunette wasn't more than thirty eight years old. Yeah sure the age gap would still be pretty big but eighteen years difference? She didn't stand a chance.

Not that she wanted to, of course. Or that's what she kept telling herself. She wasn't very convincing but there was no shame in trying.

"Sorry, didn't mean to say that, you just... you look a decade younger." She chuckled nervously and took a sip from the warm liquid.

"Well, thank you, I will gladly take the compliment."

Silence fell upon the room after that. Olivia knew that Amanda was deflecting, avoiding the subject of how she had ended up in the streets, in the middle of the night, on why she had ended up there. She wouldn't be able to avoid it for much longer, though, and that, she knew.

It's now or never.

"I went home and I immediately started packing my things." She started her gaze fixed on the liquid inside her mug. "There wasn't much to take, the apartment was already furnished, so I gathered my clothes, books, jewelry, a couple of pictures and was ready to leave. I threw away a few stuff I no longer needed like food, alcohol, a few mugs."

She took another sip and played with the object in hand a little. Olivia put her hand on the other woman's shoulder and squeezed lightly. It was her way of telling her you're safe, take all the time you need, I am here, I am listening, I am not going anywhere.

"Took me close to five hours to do that. Broken ribs n'all. Anyway, I sat down for a few minutes and attempted to call Jacob yet again, tell him that I would be crashing at his place tonight. When one of us wasn't feeling good that's what we'd do; find a way to make each other feel better." She shrugged and then took another sip.

Olivia recalled Amanda saying that she and Jacob weren't involved in a romantic way but she chose not to address it right now. If the blonde were interrupted she might never be able to start again. She would keep her question for later.

"Anyway, I kept calling and calling and it kept going straight to voicemail. I eventually decided to go by the lounge. It was the last place I wanted to be but it felt like I didn't really have a choice." Another sip, another deep breath that send waves of pain of her ribs.

You got this, Amanda. Just keep going. Just keep breathing.

That was her mantra.

Just keep breathing.

"He was there, at the bar, laughing with Gina."

"Gina?"

"The girl I technically replaced last year. She was the nicest view on Manhattan before me. Anyway, I decided to call him again and I saw him picking up his phone checking the caller ID and ignoring it." Her eyes welled up with tears but she blinked them away.

Just keep breathing.

"I walked over to them, I asked him what the fuck was going on, I made a scene. I didn't mean to, I hadn't gone there with the intention of causing trouble for either of us. Before he could answer me Teressa came at the bar. Jacob kept apologizing, telling me that he didn't have a choice that this job was all he had. I don't blame him. Red Burlesque pays real good money. I have savings to last me at least three months.

"To make a long story short they couldn't afford another scandal. The lounge needed their customers, their very rich customers and after what happened with Ramsey they couldn't keep me there. Gina would come back, she would take my place and everyone is banned from even looking at me. Teri said I should go grab my stuff from the dressing room. I told her to shove it up where the sun don't shine and left." She wiped away a tear that managed to escape her eyelids very quickly and hoped that the other woman hadn't noticed.

Of course she had, but she let it slide for the sake of the blonde.

"How long where you sitting on that bench in the rain honey?" Her hand was still on Amanda's shoulder, her thumb running soothing circles on the area.

"I walked back home took all my stuff and then started walking until I was in too much pain to do even the simple task of breathing. So, when you found me it might have been... two hours? Three? Somewhere in between that."

"God, Amanda, I am so sorry that this happened to you. Do you have any family here? Someone I could call for you?"

"Nope, not a soul. There was Jacob who kept saying that I am like his little sister and that if I was ever in trouble or in need, I would always have my big brother to come to the rescue. Big brother my ass, he bolted out the minute it came to choosing between me and something else."

"Again, I am so sorry. Nobody deserves to be treated like that." Without thinking what she was doing she pulled the blonde closer for a hug, wrapping both her arms around her petite frame.

Amanda's first I instinct was to push her away and get the hell out of there. Because her first instinct was always that people's only intention was to hurt her. But then a minute passed and then two and then three and the only thing Olivia did was whisper kind words in her ear and kiss a nearby temple here and there.

No inappropriate touching, no trying to drug her, push her pants down. Nothing like that. Just a bear hug and one that she actually felt safe in.

That's new. No one had ever done that before. She liked it. But she couldn't afford getting used to it.

"Thanks for listening, I really appreciated it." She mumbled and slowly, so she wouldn't alarm the other woman, pulled away from the embrace. She wiped away the moisture under her eyes with the sleeve of her cardigan and kept sipping her now lukewarm tea.

"Can we change the subject please?" She asked eventually.

"When did you realize you had such an incredible voice?" Okay, she definitely didn't see that one coming.

"I was twelve, I was working at my school's library, kinda needed good grades. The library's manager had to go run an errand and had me organize a few books. I started singing, thinking that I was alone. Next thing I know, I turn around and the music teacher is there. She tells me after I finish there to go find her at the gym and boom, I was discovered."

"Not at all what I had imagined." Olivia chuckled and put her mug down on the table. She rested her head in her hand and tucked her feet under her thighs on the couch.

"Oh really? And how had you imagined it?" If she was being honest she didn't really care about that but about the fact that the brunette was imagining about her. She knew it was probably meaningless but the distraction was more than welcome.

"Well, I kinda thought that you'd just sing as a five year old and your parents would take videos of you. You'd sing at plays during elementary school and then college scholarships and all." She had a dreamy look on her face and Amanda felt quite bad that she would have to ruin the pink cloud the other woman was currently floating on.

"Do you really think that if all that had happened, I would have ended up a performer at the lounge? Had that all happened the way you described them, I'd be on broadway as we speak and we probably would have never met." She scoffed.

And as twisted and bad as it may sound she was glad that she had met Olivia. She just wished it had happened under different circumstances.

"I guess not..." She yawned and put her hand in front of her mouth. She picked up her phone to check what time it was only to find out that it was a little after midnight.

"Oh my God, I must have exhausted you with all my babbling and my drama. You were probably already tired from work and I-"

"Hey, hey Amanda." She put a hand in each shoulder and carefully turned the other woman so they would be face to face. "It's fine. Plus I am not working tomorrow I have the weekend off, unless an emergency occurs. I am happy that you opened up to me. That you felt comfortable enough to share a part of your story with me." She smiled softly and raised on hand to caress a pale cheek.

"How about I go get the bedroom ready for you? You stay he-"

"Couch is fine." Amanda interrupted her.

The other woman was kind enough to let her stay at her place, she wasn't going to take her bed, too.

"Amanda, don't be ridiculous. You have four broken ribs, your wrist is still healing and there's also vaginal trauma. You are taking the bed."

"It's either the couch or I am outta here, serge. Your choice." She wasn't messing around. If the sergeant was stubborn Amanda was ten times that.

"Anyone ever told you that you are too stubborn for your own good?" Olivia let out an exasperated sigh and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yup. Too many people." She smiled innocently at the other woman, those adorable dimples making their appearance and all Olivia did was shake her head, let out a small laugh and walk towards the bedroom to get he blonde a blanket and a pillow.

"Are you sure you don't want the bed? It's queen sized, the mattress is soft. I really don't mind." She tried one last time while gently laying Amanda on the couch, always keeping in mind her injured body.

"Good night, Olivia. Thank you for everything. Promise to be out of your hair by tomorrow." She groaned as she tried to find a comfortable position.

"You are not taking the bed, okay. But you are staying here during the weekend." She saw the protest ready to fly out of the other woman's mouth and she held up her hand. "Not a negotiation. I am not leaving you alone at this state."

"Ugh fine, whatever. Can I sleep now?"

"Yes you can." She kneeled down in front of her and kissed her forehead. "Night, beautiful." She whispered.

"Good night." She said and closed her eyes and as Olivia stood up she let a smile form across her face as she heard the younger woman mumble something else, too.

"Beautiful."

A/N: I am sweating you all!!!!! I can't with this weather. Plus all the fires. Plus all the rapes, femicides and homicides that take place in my country. My heart is out to everyone who is currently struggling. If you need to talk, PM me. I am here. Have a nice day or night and take care of yourselves!