Fire cracked open scorching wood. The stillness of the night was suffocating. It was almost as if even the ruffles of wind had fallen asleep.

Sasuke's ragged, tired breaths were the only sounds filling such deafening silence. Sakura stood beside him, continuously dipping tatter into cold water. She gently placed the cloth on his feverish forehead, sighing.

It was painfully ironic. And it brought back too many memories.

Cold nights, hiding in The Forest of Death, sacrifice. She remembered her sloppily cut hair and many untruthful smiles–what they didn't know then to be the end of life as they knew it.

Standing before you, clad in uniforms and experience and power, your superiors, they try to warn you about this kind of life you're eagerly choosing.

They warn you it won't be easy. That most of the people you love will end up forgotten on reddened ground. You don't believe it at first, because everyone thinks they are the exception. But it makes sense after awhile.

As time passes by, you see it more and more clearly. You don't question it anymore, the possibility of loss. Hell, you've experienced it firsthand. You fight against it, but you know not all fights can be won.

They don't tell you, though, about the what if's. How unbelievable cruel they are. They represent a possibility of what could have been, but failed in the end. So here you are. Trying to keep it together has become a daily ritual. A mantra.

Sakura watched as Sasuke shuddered through gritted teeth in sickness. But she had to remain devoid of panic and worry and what if he doesn't ever wake up—if she hoped to have a decent shot at saving him.

Rose-colored glasses long renounced, she damned the cruelty of it all.

It happened too quickly. The fighting had almost completely ceased by that point and she was inwardly celebrating. She forgot that was all it took: one moment when your body turns to what makes you vulnerable for you to become just that. Sakura believed she had thoroughly immobilized all three of their enemies. She had seen them be pierced by lightning, felt their insides writhe beneath her fist.

She had miscalculated.

Overwhelmed by the implications of her first collaboration with Sasuke in an actual fight, she failed to notice one of them still moving. By the time she finally did, it was already too late.

Selfishly, she wanted to show off her progress. She wanted to show Sasuke just how much she improved. Because for her, it has always been Sasuke.

Even back then, as much as a thirteen-year-old could love someone, Sakura sincerely loved him. He had always pushed her, challenged her to reach past her limits. Growth is conditioned only by transcending your comfort zone. And she did. Sakura had wanted him to acknowledge her after all these years, because she deserved it.

The young kunoichi did everything right, trained non-stop, studied all the time. Sakura only ever wanted to be enough. Even so, if it weren't for Sasuke's keen instincts, she would have been the one poisoned, battling to survive.

Sakura wishes she was.

In the end, she wasn't strong enough when it actually mattered. She lost her composure.

Sakura had long dreamed about the moment she would lay her eyes upon him again. The set design was different every time, but the actors played it out all the same—her feet would be firm, fist at the ready and her heart unwavering, the way Naruto's had always been. And Sasuke would crack, eventually. But actually seeing him after so long... it tore away at her heart and that had led her to an amateur, regrettable mistake.

Sakura remembered how it felt when Sasuke left to train with Orochimaru. He denied her that night, when she cried and pleaded and broke into pieces before his tired eyes.

And while Sasuke might not have taken her with him, he took something of hers away, instead.

Now, with hot tears flowing down her cheeks, Sakura only wished to speak to him again. Maybe ask him once more, just for the sake of it. Or even scold him for leaving her in the cold, all alone at night. There were so many things that she wanted to say, so many things she never had the courage to face him about before. And now...

No. He just had to wake up.

Determined, she wiped her eyes and straightened her back. She would NOT let him die. To hell with dwelling on the unfairness of it all, to hell with everything.

The forest was the furthest thing from the comfortable, sterile labs she was used to back at home, but you don't get to be picky about the circumstances you're given. It was time she actually made Lady Tsunade proud. She quickly wrapped her hair with a makeshift elastic, tightened her ponytail once and disposed of her gloves.

Sasuke would not die tonight. So long as she breathed on this earth, none of them were allowed to ever die.


He suddenly felt life filling his veins.

His senses flared all the same, bringing him back to complete consciousness. His body recovered slower than his mind but thankfully, breathing wasn't as much of a challenge for his lungs anymore.

Many would agree that Sasuke Uchiha was unlike any other man. He was a shinobi, that was a given. But more than anything, he was an avenger. His driving force, his motivation drastically differed from other people. With his eyes open, he only saw the road ahead and when he closed them, the same image would burn in the depths of his mind. He was aware aspirations like his came at a great cost. Discipline had always intertwined with pain. Despite the ache of bones and limbs and anything really, survival was absolute.

He knew better than to remain still and vulnerable in an uncertain situation. Not much of a choice, not when it came to someone like him.

Since God doesn't watch over those who wish to kill their brothers, Sasuke had to watch out for himself. Not that it bothered him. But if such a being even existed, Sasuke knew God had forsaken him from the very beginning. Because Hell was not unknown to him.

So he slowly opened his eyes, tried the bend of his fingers and inhaled deeply. Despite a blurry vision and an incomplete recovery, Sasuke forced himself to get a grip. Foggy memories leading to his current predicament began forming in his mind. He was fighting. Sakura was there. She was uncharacteristically brave and her strikingly green eyes haven't changed at all.

The two of them apparently fought together.

He knew there would come a time when he would see them again. Still, he never expected it to be this soon. And Sakura being the first one he encountered complicated everything. It seemed too soon, almost.

That night all those months ago, Sakura stood before him, desperate and vulnerable and honest. She mercilessly tempted him with what he knew he could never have: a place among them. There was no place for darkness between sunlight and spring, there just wasn't.

And he would do it all over again, if he had to. Break her heart and break everything in his way. Kill Naruto if that's what it took to get away from the hope of it, once and for all. And damn himself, too, in the process. But surviving was absolute and no mistakes had been made but the space between his bones had never felt more hollow.

Sakura spoke words of love to him back then, poured her heart out, foolishly thinking he would change his mind. Sasuke hated her and hated himself and hated them because for a second, he could see it. He was quickly reminded of what his choice meant: a darkness that would shadow everything Sakura, Naruto, Kakashi, what they all stood for.

Only to see her again today, pastel hues and witchy green eyes full of something utterly foreign to him. Only to have his body move on its own to shield her like he always used to do, breaking down his treacherous resolve bit by bit.

He hated her for it.

The dizziness slowly faded away completely, bleeding into anger and confusion. He knew she was going to be there and greet him when he awakened. He could almost feel her worried feline eyes studying him carefully.

He knew Sakura Haruno. And unlike him, Sakura was not a deserter.

But in that moment, Sasuke wishes she was.

"Take it easy, will you! Your body's still healing."

Ah. The ever so loyal and kind. It was almost amusing how completely predictable she was. He was unsure whether he felt bitterness or relief towards those gently touched by Heaven. She spoke to him kindly, as if he never broke her, as if none of it ever fucking happened.

Sasuke glared at her and briefly wondered how someone could be so annoying.

"Why are you here."

"Be careful! I administered the antidote but it takes awhile to fully get rid of the poison. No more sudden moves, okay?"

Medical ninjutsu, huh. He had seen her growing reserves, steady and powerful, indeed. And the immaculate chakra control, too. Something like that had to very hard to maintain. He didn't know what to do with this newly found piece of information. Of course he didn't expect her to just mop around and cry for him, but still. This Sakura took him by surprise.

It fit her perfectly, though. Being a medical ninja. His touch brought about devastation and fear while her hands mended the broken and chased away the pain. It fit her like a glove. The realization made his blood boil.

"You got poisoned because of me and I'm really sorry about it. I guess I got carried away a bit too much towards the end there but uh, I fixed it now. You'll feel better in no time, I promise."

She always talked way too much, at least that hasn't changed, then.

"Uhm, there's water if you're thirsty and-"

"Sakura."

His voice startled her enough to refrain from saying any more. Good. Sasuke finally had the time to properly asses the person fidgeting before him. Was she actually nervous? He would never admit it out loud, but the skinny little frightened girl he once knew was no more.

Sakura had grown into a young woman. She had always been beautiful. Even someone as dumb as Naruto could see that, yes. It was just one of her qualities and that was that. Sasuke didn't dwell on it and didn't blatantly stare at her the way all the other guys would. Sasuke had only ever been focusing on his goal. He never wasted precious time on stupid, insignificant things.

But actually seeing her now, being so physically close to her, he couldn't help but notice.

Compelling emerald eyes were perfectly framed by the paleness of alabaster skin. Her red lips seemed fuller, the cheeks were plumper too. Her hair was the same shade of dusty pink he remembered, just longer. The vibrant contrast between her ridiculous colors and the monochrome backdrop of his icy world seemed almost offensive. Her body changed too, and for reasons he did not want to know, that made him furious. She was no longer so thin and scrawny, she became svelte and graceful instead.

Sakura wore the body of a woman now. She was so...beautiful.

"You could at least say something. I did save your life, you know."

Foolish, annoying, little girl. You should know better than that by now.

"I am your enemy." He stated coldly.

"No, you're not!"

She seemed so frustrated with him for allowing such words to leave his mouth. Maybe she was scared. Hn. As she should be.

As long as she understood that the bonds they spoke so highly of, the team they foolishly dreamed of, as long as she got it through her head that part of his life was over.

"No matter how much you push us away, we will always come back for you. We haven't given up on you."

How could he ever expect her to understand? Sasuke wasn't entirely sure if he even wanted her to. He wouldn't want anyone to truly understand what it was like. None of them deserved to know.

Sasuke quickly got up off the ground and without missing a beat, so did she. If there was any residue pain in his bones, he didn't feel it.

The only thing he felt was hot, familiar anger.

"Where are you going?" She asked, reluctantly raising her hand to grip his arm, but then quickly deciding against it.

"Look, you can't go yet."

Sakura began explaining about the flower. She told him about its properties and how the dangers of it existing in the shinobi world were far greater than she originally thought. How the poison it carried on the exterior shielded a hidden potential. Something like a secret weapon. She spoke about the possibility of it falling into wrong hands, so he immediately figured she had been aware of the reasons why he was searching for it. And for whom the flower was actually intended for.

After that, she prettily asked him to please use your fireball and burn the glade, Sasuke and the flowers along with it. To keep everything that happened over there a secret.

She would tell Tsunade she hadn't managed to find the miraculous flower and he would tell Orochimaru there was no real benefit to it beyond killing those who sought after it, which he came frighteningly close to (maybe he would leave that part out).

Sakura didn't ask him to come back, didn't fall on her knees, didn't stutter nor cried. She didn't do any of the things Sasuke expected of her. Instead, she came up with a rather smart proposition about how they should handle this situation.

Not as friends, not as enemies, but as shinobi. True shinobi fighting for the greater good. It angered him. She still had the nerve to think of him as a decent person, and no matter how much he tried to neglect it...Damn. Somewhere deep down he found it rather comforting.

However heartless and obsessed he had become over the years, there were still people who insisted. There was Sakura, who clung to a part of him that never did him any good. For a brief moment, he envisioned shadows dancing through the sunrise, thinking how he hadn't been completely devoid of hues. He thought about remnants of color running deep within his veins, familiar and strange all the same. It was then he realized the antidote Sakura cooked up might just have made him sicker.

Because life was mercilessly cruel. And he couldn't figure out what aggravated him most: being unable to blend in with them or refusing to even try.

He watched her exhale deeply, anxiously waiting for him to say something.But Sasuke never did. He just went ahead and summoned his signature jutsu, burning all the stupid flowers to nothingness, just like she wanted.

He didn't do it for her. No. He did it for himself. A weaker Orochimaru was easier to kill and the faster he got rid of him, the closer he was to finally killing Itachi.

"Thank you." She smiled.

"Hn."

He wanted to jump away, to retreat back to his darkness, back to his goal. Away from the green and the pink and away from her. He wasn't used to Sakura like this. She carried herself with so much dignity, so much beauty. He was almost envious that she went ahead and blossomed when he wasn't there to see it. Sasuke didn't want to feel proud, he didn't want to feel anything.

But he did and it was all her fault.

"Wait!"

Before he could make the jump, Sakura quickly cut in front of him.

"This—"

"—is payment for saving your life."

She kissed him. It was chaste and innocent. Full of feeling and so full of her. It felt strange, intoxicating in the best of ways, to be touched to intimately by the only person in the world who ever crossed that bridge when it came to him.

Sasuke didn't want to feel this.

He didn't want to feel her tenderness nor the warmth of her touch. Or the way her lips almost quivered when they met his. Or how her breath lingered on his neck before she completely pulled away. He just couldn't feel this.

"Be careful out there. We miss you...I miss you. But you already know that. Don't hate me too much for the kiss. That was my way of saying I still think about you. It was good to see you again, Sasuke."

Good to see me again, huh.

If Sasuke wasn't Sasuke, he would laugh. Not because it was funny, but because it was hilarious.

Ninjas aren't offered the luxury of belief, of faith, in anything beyond the kunai. Because the moment that you do, that you rely on something so far out of yourself, death grips you. Like the devil. It tempts you, drowns you in false security so palpable it's uncanny. And shinobi, they know what that actually is: Genjutsu.

Plainly, an illusion.

And Sasuke was faulty by design, because he couldn't even have that. But in that one moment when she inched closer than people had ever done before—and why didn't he flinch?—it felt just like that. Something too good to be true.

"I never hated you, Sakura."

Sasuke looked at her, his iconic smirk back on full display. She looked so hazy, was she shy? He could see it written all over her face. A mere touch of their lips had her all flustered and nervous and he couldn't help but wonder how she would react if he crossed that bridge again.

"But you're still annoying."

Before any more ridiculous thoughts threatened to strain his judgement, Sasuke chose to retreat back to the depths of the forest where he belonged. In a second, he was gone.

.

.

.

.

After a while, Sakura hesitantly touched her lips, wary as not to scare away that blissful feeling. She closed her eyes and tried to contain the glorious blush showing on her face. What did she just do?

.

.

The first time it happened, it was only a kiss.


Author's note:

hi guys. how'd i do? this chapter was a bitch to write. sasuke was a bitch to write, but i love writing him. lol. next chap is going to be more centered around sakura's pov.

this story is something i've thought about for a long time. as you can see, this is the first time they meet and it's somewhere a bit pre shippuden. i had this idea that they meet in secret throughout the series and yeah... i'm curious where this story will go.

please review! it keeps me going. i know i write for myself but seeing people commenting and liking my story really makes my day. thanks for reading! hope i did well.