A/N: I'm so glad to finally get this chapter done, it's been WIP for a whole year :cries in writer:. Massive thanks to shyesplease for suggestions that helped unblock me this week and also thanks to Batty for encouragement. I think this chapter might end up being the most difficult one to write in the first half of the fic, because it turns out managing 7 characters in 1 highly emotional and tense scene with good balance is tricky! Anyhow, I really hope stuff will flow easier after this.
Extra warning on top of the general story ones, Cisco does insult Savitar in this chapter near the end in a way I'd say is kinda ableist (related to his scars), although not in quite the same vein as the show's insults I wanted to avoid replicating. I'm not fond of it but I think it is in character for Cisco to be quite petty and mean when angry and he thinks it's deserved for a villain. Expect things to be quite antagonistic between Cisco & Savitar for some time, though I hope to avoid any other insults of this vein in future chapters. Overall, Savitar is being a dramatic so-and-so this chapter, reveling in stirring things up, but things will start to warm up slowly.
Chapter 3: it's just what they do
Song for Chapter 3 - "This Night" by Black Lab
Some of the chapter 3 content actually got shifted to chapter 4, because this chapter ended up so long on the setup conversations with Barry and the team, so technically there's a hint in this chapter's song as to a plot point that's now in chapter 4.
Barry isn't sure what to expect when he returns to the cold, derelict shell of a warehouse. There's a fleeting thought there, is this home to a man like Savitar? Or just a convenient kidnap location. The latter reflection should answer what type of man Savitar is. Same as all his other acts.
But that simple knowledge he'd clung to before - the pure evilness Barry was so assured of when it came to Savitar - is complicated by this new information. Knowing Savitar was once him. If what Caitlin said is true. He doesn't doubt her , but he wonders if it could be a ruse somehow. Could he really fall that far, to be capable of choosing himself over everyone else? To finally fail at being a hero. But was it still failing at being a hero if you no longer tried? Was that why Savitar preferred to play the villain?
A part of him wants to believe this is all an elaborate ploy, and yet a larger part of him doesn't think it is, because how could Caitlin be so convinced otherwise? Wouldn't she know, better than anyone else, who she was looking at? She knew him inside and out; she knew all the places all the scars would be if his speed healing hadn't removed any trace of them, every spot that still ached on bad days.
She knew who she'd seen and that was what brought her to tears in the Cortex. Looking up at the face of her abductor and being so sure. And despite being so fragile, shaking, she'd thought of everyone else, pushed past her discomfort to explain best she could. The reason she hadn't wanted to tell them was because she knew it would shock them. That it would hit him square in the chest and knock the metaphorical wind out of them the same as it had of him.
He still isn't over the revelation, barely enough time to process it, but he has a purpose that drives him here. Caitlin had presented a way to negate the damage done and prevent the future that has hung over them as inevitable these past few months. She'd given them hope and Barry's hope reaches that bit further, that Savitar means it because he knows he does, and surely that's in Savitar too if he's really him. Doubt flashes up as well as he waits in the frigid air of the dingy warehouse, could it all be a game to him? A cruel torture, perhaps. One more mind game to throw them off track, always second-guessing their actions when he's ten steps ahead of them. But Barry wants to believe this could be over. He also really hopes returning here was the right call and not a belated trap. If Savitar wants to be found...
Speaking of the man, Barry feels his hair raise with static and sees a figure shifting in the far doorway to some corridor. Uncertainty floods him then, faced with his enemy - possibly former enemy now - and no fight immediately in sight. Should he walk over? How do you greet your twisted time remnant from the future? He's embarrassed to be grateful when Savitar starts walking over towards him. Though it's a slow pace, deceptively casual, his unease grows at it. The gait is subtly wrong for him, and he seems a strange mix of languid and rigid, but enough of the stance, the way he walks, flags up as familiar of a sort. That gets Barry believing because things like that are hard to fake. It's his gut instinct watching Savitar move that tells him Savitar is indeed another version of him, and this time, unlike so many other times, he won't ignore his gut feeling and first impression.
When Savitar finally gets within his sight, Barry's surprised to see how different he looks. The scars he hadn't been prepared for, but it's also the lines around his eyes, however faint they are with how little he seems to age now, and the wary, weary expression on his face. It's like looking into a mirror at a person he could have been if his life had gone down another path. He's seen an echo of that look on his face in actual mirrors in his brief darker moments; when his anger got the better of him and he felt like his life was following a path to punish him, one he couldn't get off of. When Bivolo had whammied his father had been killed in front of him. In the aftermath of having to ask Thawne to kill his mother all over again to reset Flashpoint. It's the look of being faced with difficult situations, and difficult choices, which is fitting, all things considered.
That recognition welling inside him the longer he stands before Savitar is why he believes Caitlin and knows it's another him he's standing in front of – this anger is an anger he knows intimately. And he hates being shown it, an inescapable worst version of himself. He swallows down the sickness he feels and focuses on the task at hand. Ensuring Iris lives. Barry doesn't want to examine right now the promise that this version of him gets to live too, gets to share in his life despite what he's done. That idea is an inconsequential detail compared to saving those he loves. That they all get a life, a future, is something he would pay almost any price to ensure.
"Caitlin says she made a deal with you. We save you, everyone lives.ˮ
"What's the matter, Barr ,ˮ Savitar says, voice low and not hiding the mocking way he says the nickname. "Not so certain you want the deal now you're here? A little too much of a deal with the devil for your liking?ˮ
Barry swallows down his annoyance, stick to the basics . "How do I know we can trust you?ˮ
"You don't,ˮ Savitar says smugly, nonchalantly gesturing to him with one arm. Barry doesn't miss how the other hand is almost balled up by his side. He appears practically jolly as he replies, taking a perverse pleasure in reminding Barry of that fact, how at the mercy of him Barry is even as Barry comes to offer him help. "But I could say the exact same thing. How do I know you won't just pretend to help me, only to let me get erased from existence like you all truly want.ˮ
"Point taken. But I don't want that,ˮ he says, tilting his head, trying to catch Savitar's eye so he can see how genuinely he means that, but Savitar rolls his eyes and gives Barry another scathing once over like he's weighing him up and finding him lacking. Barry continues anyway, desperate for this to work but trying not to let that, or his own frustration and anger, show in his tone or how he holds himself. "I don't want anyone to get erased from existence, and we have weeks, months before...ˮ
"Before Iris is going to die.ˮ Savitar finishes bluntly what Barry can't bring himself to voice. At first that correction, so matter of fact and accepting of it, makes him want to lash out against the man he faces. But he holds his temper because it doesn't have to be like that, not anymore. That's what he's here for. Please let this be the end of the nightmare.
Savitar smirks and rolls his eyes again at Barry's discomfort, at his careful silence and the deep breath he takes to find the required patience to deal with Savitar.
"I'll do whatever it takes-ˮ Barry starts to say, but Savitar isn't exactly patient with him in return.
"To save Iris? Yeah, I got that memo, too. Lucky for you,ˮ Savitar says with a tilt of his hips, shifting his weight to lean against a nearby concrete pillar. " You get that dream made true. No more living nightmare for the real Barry Allen.ˮ Savitar points toward Barry making the 'you' more of an accusation, which sets off Barry's mental alarms even more than before. He's faking a loose laid-back vibe but is no doubt still ready to spring into action at anything regarded as a danger to him. The whole time they've been talking Barry's felt on edge, because Savitar is subtly faster in everything he does, as if he's on a slightly different frequency, always on alert himself.
"I didn't say you weren't real,ˮ Barry says, confused about where that idea has come from. He wishes he knew more about what happened, though it's apparent now that most of what Savitar says is to spite Barry being 'the lucky one' on this side of their timeline. "Look, I know something bad went down in our fu-ˮ
Savitar laughs, forced and ringing out loud and hard, echoing in the empty space around them. Unusually, he takes his eyes off Barry for a moment, dropping his guard. There's something almost manic looking in his eyes from this angle, but it's hard to read him properly when he looks to the dark skies above through the skylight, avoidant then of Barry's gaze.
" Something bad? Understatement of my decade there. Try something s . Try everything ,ˮ he says with his hands thrown wide, pushing off from the lazy appearing position he'd held before. His stare is intense and back on Barry, fueled by a fury that isn't so well restrained now. Barry doesn't know if he's exaggerating, if it just felt like everything to Savitar, or if he should be believed. Probably the latter considering what it drove him to. How else could he turn out so bad?
"Imagine the worst timeline possible. No friends. No family,ˮ Savitar says venomously, stepping closer. "Try not feeling like a hero anymore,ˮ he says with a little less venom, almost proud though Barry can't tell why he would be. He gets closer to Barry with each clarification. With each pointed reality. "Or even, like a person.ˮ
Maybe Barry should feel threatened with Savitar so close now, maybe he should back off, but all Barry can see is the pain in those eyes that meet his again. Watery despite Savitar's best efforts to channel that emotion into anger and only anger. The last statement feels more like an admission.
"I'm sorry, I can't change your past. But please, let us help you.ˮ
There's a pause and then Savitar appears to have a thought. He changes tack then, aflush with anger again. On the defensive.
"Why do you think you can ?ˮ Savitar asks, swiftly backpedaling away before he turns on Barry, at a distance once more. He's practically roaring at the audacity. "You come in here with your pathetic offer to make things better, to make things right , but what are you going to do ? What can you do that I can't , did you think of that? I have infinitely more knowledge of the Speedforce, literal years on you.ˮ
"I don't know,ˮ Barry says, unable to stop the hopelessness infecting him too then, worrying this is a fool's errand he jumped to, "But we have some of the best and brightest in the multiverse at S.T.A.R. Labs, or just a call away, if anyone can we c-ˮ
"Save me the pep talk and the vague promises. I didn't get where I am with wishy-washy,ˮ Savitar says, punctuating his point with a dismissive wave of his hand. "I planned meticulously, I fought to stay alive. But somehow you think you can do better than me. I'm just another person Barry Allen couldn't save. Or maybe, I'm meant to be one more feather in your cap, plucked from a doomed timeline to make you feel better, to soothe that good ol' savior complex of yours. Two for one this time; save me, save Iris. ˮ
"I mean it. I don't want this for any of us. What can I do to convince you?ˮ
"I'm you, right? That's what you think anyway, so what does it say that you can't convince yourself, hmm?ˮ he says, not hiding his schadenfreude. Savitar's mouth splits into yet another wry grin that is half hidden by the shadows, leaving only his scarred side exposed, his difference and his bitterness highlighted.
He realizes then that Savitar's enjoying this, eating up the opportunity to dig into his failings. Even at his own expense. And it would be so easy to rise to the bait but that won't help anyone. There's more distance between them now physically than there was at any other point other than when he arrived and Barry worries it's a sign he's lost him and lost all hope of a solution with him. Barry tries in vain to come up with an answer and finds nothing reassuring coming to mind.
Savitar looks away and shakes his head as if disgusted with such a lackluster showing from another him. Barry wonders then, not for the first time, why did Savitar consider this at all? Is this just amusement for him? Another mind game. With how painful this is, Barry doesn't think so. A chance to air his grievances perhaps, but there's still that vein of hope running through Barry, that Savitar has a heart, however broken it is. He let Caitlin go. He wanted to believe her too.
He thinks then about what he would be without everyone he loves and he can imagine an outline of the dark path Savitar had taken. It wouldn't destroy him right away – he'd keep fighting like he always has. But hope erodes day by day; he knows it because he's felt that recently the closer they get to May 23rd. He imagines that magnified tenfold, not just Iris's death forcing a retreat to the Time Vault, years of depression, but a gaping void ready and waiting to consume him the moment he falters. No one being by his side, no one believing in him. It could have killed him, but Savitar chose anger and survival instead. How do you get out of that pit of darkness once it's taken over?
"I can't give you everything you've lost, but there's no limit on love. My friends were your friends, once upon a time, maybe you can rekindle that, and in a weird way, you're family too now. You can't have your old life back but it's not either/or, we can both exist. I don't know who told you otherwise-ˮ Savitar inexplicably laughs at that. "-but they were wrong. You said before you didn't want to kill Iris. Here's your chance to avoid that. It would be hard,ˮ Barry says with a half-shrug, dearly hoping he is getting through with this, "but there has to be a way forward, nothing is impossible if we work together.ˮ
All Savitar says to his heartfelt monologue is, "I wouldn't go that far. We're,ˮ he says with a quick dismissive motion from him to Barry, " not working together.ˮ
There's an awkward pause before Savitar continues, sounding exasperated but resigned to Barry's intent, which feels rather like he's finally giving in to Barry. "Try if you feel you must. We'll see how the dice fall. Maybe you'll succeed, maybe you won't. I'm not the one who's desperate for change here, because, unlike you, I have a plan.ˮ
Barry dips his head thoughtfully because it's something, progress. Savitar won't admit he wants it, but if he'll just let them try for better that means there is a chance to change everyone's fate.
"Exactly, what have you got to lose? Will you come with me, come home?ˮ
Savitar scoffs at that word. "I suppose you want me to think about it, decide with my heart.ˮ It's said with so much scorn Barry finds it hard to see the similarities they have.
"I...I don't have any answers for you, but we'll try. We'll fight to keep everyone alive. And when we deliver on that promise, you'll have a second chance. What you do with that is up to you.ˮ
Savitar says nothing to this, abruptly turned away and unreadable to Barry. Maybe this is where it's gone wrong, impossible to come back from, but Barry can't give up just yet. He has to try as hard as is in him to sell this to Savitar, to save Iris and to honor the promise Caitlin made to him.
"If you don't believe me, if you think it's so hopeless, why are you here? Why are you talking to me? Somewhere in there under that bitterness and the scars is what's left of Barry Allen and I know you want more, than thisˮ Barry says firmly, indicating to the bleak surroundings that are so far from anywhere Barry could ever consider home. Of course, he thinks about how he'd want more but that isn't the only reason can think of for Savitar. He thinks of how they got to where they are... "You didn't want to be alone, that's why you took Caitlin. You wanted someone to fight for you. Well, she did, and here we are offering you a way out. Take it or leave. I'm going home, to the people I love. Where you go is up to you.ˮ
Savitar turns to stare at him, no longer mocking, serious instead, but he still doesn't answer. Barry flashes out of there, finding it hard to relax at leaving their best hope behind. But when he appears at the other end there's footsteps behind him and he sees Savitar, arms crossed, trailing in his wake sulkily. He's unnerved by having his time remnant, his former enemy, so close behind him. There's a weight to each step he enters The Cortex, of what he now needs to live up to.
Seeing everyone react to Savitar is bizarre, especially the strange way everyone but Caitlin flicks between the two of them, taking in all the ways they are the same as much as the differences. Caitlin still stares wide-eyed, like she can't quite believe it. Looking like she's holding her breath at this development, at Savitar delivered to their promised rescue attempt.
Joe gapes. Wally backs up a little at the sight of a nightmare before them all. Cisco recovers quickest, but he has a faraway look in his eyes, staring through Savitar - something that Barry hopes is a sign of his genius gears turning inside his mind but he equally fears it in case Cisco has other ideas.
Iris rushes toward Barry initially, glad he's back safe, but falters upon seeing him . Barry turns to see Savitar tense, and he remains like that as Iris walks determinedly past Barry toward him.
"Iris! What are you doing?" Wally asks with a note of panic, though he stays unnaturally still for a speedster. He's not moving any further back in fear of Savitar, but neither is he moving forward to react to the perceived threat like he normally would. Joe has his gun unholstered already by the time Iris turns back around to reassure Wally. Barry also sees Cisco's fingers flex and tense by his side like he's readying himself to channel his vibrational energy.
"It's okay. If he wanted to hurt me he already had his chance and he didn't take it," she says before fearlessly stepping even closer to Savitar.
It seems like it takes restraint for Savitar to not move away, or to not move closer to her, it's hard to tell which. Iris' hand hovers near his cheek for a moment, almost touching his scars. The first words out of her mouth to him are practical though "What do we call you?ˮ
Savitar shifts away from her then, pivots to avoid her near touch and the gaze of everyone upon his spectacle.
"Anything but Barry.ˮ
"You'll need a new identity,ˮ Joe finally speaks as he lowers his gun to his side in a show of trust; his other go-to not that dissimilar to Iris's, to figure out what is required to make this work. Joe tries to catch Savitar's eye as he speaks and Barry wonders if Joe's trying to find some familiarity in this somewhat foreign face, to see what's left of Barry in Savitar. But, like with everything else, Savitar avoids giving any ground there, barely acknowledging Joe as the one who spoke and choosing to reply more generally against the idea.
"What do you suggest, long-lost twin?ˮ Savitar says, trotting out the scornfulness. Barry winces, worried that this is hardly the first impression he needs to make to get everyone on his side. "Bit 'Days of Our Lives' but I don't see why I'd have to give up the family name and I kinda like the name Bart, what do you think?ˮ
Savitar is repressing a grin now, with an amused glint in his eyes as he glances back to Barry, knowing full well Barry hates the name. Barry grits his teeth and tries to play nice even though he isn't feeling it one bit right now. "We could make you my cousin.ˮ
"We don't have any cousins. Or aunts. Or uncles,ˮ Savitar says sounding like he's enjoying poking holes where he can.
"Long-lost aunt, long-lost cousin,ˮ Iris supplies, still optimistic. "Anything we need, Felicity can make it happen.ˮ
"Well that's only ID, my name is Savitar.ˮ
Barry can't stop himself from scoffing this time, "You want us to keep calling you a name of a god?ˮ
Savitar cocks his head and stares back at Barry's challenge. And Barry recognizes it as a strange test of their resolve.
"Fine, whatever. I don't care,ˮ Barry says, keen to brush off the question of his time remnant's name. Because, out of all the things they need to resolve, that triviality definitely isn't the hill he wants to die on.
"Savitar it is then, simple,ˮ Iris states, though her voice is a bit brittle after his rebuffing them and her olive branch refused. Savitar clearly isn't going to play nice with any of them.
Iris retreats to within Barry's reach and he automatically reaches out to her to comfort her, but that makes Savitar roll his eyes at the tenderness displayed. He looks away and makes out as if he's examining the place, as if it's unfamiliar when it must be so like home how could he possibly forget it. Just how long has it been since Savitar was at S.T.A.R. Labs? He's at a sizable distance from everyone; they stand grouped together in a semicircle on the other side of the main desk and Savitar puts that furniture between them, another barrier they could do without considering what they aim to do, a reconciliation that still feels so far away. Right now, everyone is tense, an awful start to this truce, and Barry doesn't know how to fix it.
The atmosphere is broken by HR, who stumbles into the room with a fumbled drum stick toss that clangs on the floor and a tray of coffees suddenly deposited on the desk next to Savitar.
"Oh. I see we have a, ah, a very delicate kind of situation here. Wow, so quiet! You could hear a pin, or dare I say, a drumstick, drop!ˮ HR says animatedly with his hands now they are freed. "So tense, all the arms crossed,ˮ he says, faux crossing his own for a long second to illustrate the observation. "Anyhoo, I think introductions are in order. Break the ice, if you'll excuse the pun, dear Caitlin Snow who is, in truth, anything but cold like her name. Except occasionally literally, but we don't hold that against her. HR Wells of Earth-19, pleased to make yet another Earth-1 acquaintance.ˮ
HR holds out a hand of friendship with a smile that reaches his eyes, an action just about unimpeded by the past as it could be, and Savitar dismisses it. Says nothing, turning his gaze to apparently more important people. People who Barry worries are seen as a threat still. HR waves off the slight, like it's nothing and even sets one coffee aside on the desk for Savitar – Barry's willing to bet that's HR's own coffee – and starts moving to distribute the rest to the team. The hint, however, is taken because HR scampers off after. Barry's not sure what Savitar has against HR but it's not something to dwell on now when they have bigger fish to fry.
The tension from before HR arrived is hardly dissipated but the coffees help a little. Caitlin keeps taking quick sips of hers like it's a nervous habit, in between biting her lip. Iris had tried to back off from Barry when she collected her coffee from HR but Savitar's gaze flicks back over to them every few seconds or so. Whatever damage was done by their closeness isn't going to be fixed by that one attempt to make things less awkward for him. Just being here must remind Savitar of what he lost.
But Barry knows Savitar must still want his life as he would. He hopes being here will get through to him, show him what he can have again – not a replica of his old life, but something new, new for all of them. Following him here shows he's willing to give it a go but there's still the threat they'll revert to enemies. Enemies might well be easier than this because Savitar is not about to make Barry comfortable. He wants to make it hard even though he probably also kind of wants it to succeed. His behavior is going against the grain of his actions, but his actions, his willingness to be there, is speaking louder than his bitterness. Mind you, the bitterness is still hard for Barry to stomach.
A meta alert breaks the silence. No one dares move.
"I could get that. If that's okay?" Wally says quietly, looking to Joe first briefly and then across to Barry and Iris.
In return, Iris glances to Savitar, trying to gauge his reaction when he catches her gaze on him as an unspoken forward of the question.
"By all means, go," Savitar says, throwing one arm out in a wide motion to emphasize his last word. "Don't let me stop you playing hero," he continues snidely, though he barely looks at Wally as he replies. He's acting with what seems like a feigned disinterest in Wally that Barry files away for later consideration.
Wally gives another glance back to Iris who smiles a little grimly but nods in the affirmative to reassure him.
"That would be great. Thanks, Wally," Barry adds, drumming up some forced cheerfulness to match his genuine gratitude that he doesn't have to leave when there's still so much to discuss. Wally nods gravely to him in return and speeds away, the only one of them done with this awkward conversation.
"So what's the plan? Let's say you save me. What then? How's it going to work? What about a job? Where do I live? Do I get the loft? Do I get Team Flash karaoke nights? Do I get an invite to the wedding and would I sit bride-side or groom? Or do I get a concrete room in the basement of S.T.A.R. Labs and a pat on the back for smiling and looking halfway happy while my life is yours .ˮ
Savitar is trying his patience again and Barry resists the urge to pull answers out of a hat. Because Savitar will simply push further and further. Iris, unusually quiet, looks at him and he shakes his head to indicate she shouldn't answer this because it won't be any better coming from her. All he can do is address the immediate.
"You stay here for the time being. The overnight cots aren't great but they'll do until we can figure out a more permanent solution. I already have more money from the Wells Estate than I know what to do with, half of that is yours.ˮ
It's not a bad answer, even if Barry says so himself, but after that, Savitar has the audacity to dismiss it which riles him up, probably exactly as intended. "I don't care about the specifics right now, not when my biggest concern is a looming paradox, but it's certainly not inspiring confidence to hear you've not really thought this through.ˮ
"We...we...ˮ Barry looks to Iris again, to Caitlin, to Joe, to Cisco. Stalling as he racks his brain for a solid idea of a fix, wishing he or someone had a good answer. Iris and Caitlin are both hard to read, some measure of torn and anguished. Cisco's silently brimming with something. Joe just watches, hand never far from his holster. "We don't know how to fix it yet. And I don't know what kind of life we can give you, but step one is we save you. Stop the paradox, buy us all time.ˮ
"And meantime I, what, live here in some souped-up guest quarters like I'm some outsider from another Earth, while you watch me night and day in case I do something evil again. And I wait, trusting you to save me.ˮ
"Pretty much, and you should be grateful we're even considering this!" Cisco demands, a sudden surge of protectiveness spurring him into saying something after all. "You might look like Barry, or half of him anyway, but you're not even half the man he is. The Barry I know would never, never do what you did. Not in a million years-ˮ
"Hey, hey,ˮ Barry says trying to pacify things, getting in between Cisco and Savitar. There's a desk in the way too but it doesn't seem enough to leave it at that. "You're not helping, man,ˮ he murmurs to Cisco as he gently pushes him back. "Think of Iris,ˮ he pleads under his breath with his friend. Cisco simmers down at that, but there's no hiding how appalled he is at Savitar's lack of gratitude.
When Barry glances back to Savitar he's calm, too calm. There's a dark brooding look and he's taking slow deep breaths that Barry's concerned may belie a barely controlled anger. Savitar somehow keeps his cool and for a moment Barry finds that hard to trust, to trust him to reign in his darker impulses. But then he remembers the pride he had in how meticulous he was, a master of the long game, and all it comes down to is whether Savitar is willing to bet on them helping him, like it seems by his coming here.
"The things I've done, you can't forget them anymore than I can. You'll always see me as that person, the deficient version unworthy of your...time.ˮ For a split second Barry was sure Savitar was going to say something else, but what he does say so neatly segues into his spiraling doubt and makes Barry scared they've gone backward. "So you should see why I don't believe you when you say you're committed to spending god knows how long looking for a solution to save murderous old me.ˮ
There's something about Savitar's self-deprecating statement that makes Barry feel like he's only saying it before they can, so he won't be surprised if they do. Barry fixes Cisco with a look that stops his reply short, but the frustration is nevertheless shown all over his face and in his tense body language.
"If you say you want to change, we accept that.ˮ Iris pipes up with confidently. Cisco looks like he wants to disagree, opening his mouth and getting out a huff before any words escape, but a quick look from Iris shushes him and he keeps mum. "You'd hardly be the first villain we'd know who we believed in and who turned over a new leaf. ˮ
"Didn't exactly turn out so well for your friend Len.ˮ
Barry feels a flush of anger at that, riled up at the unpleasant reminder he was in some way responsible for Leonard Snart's untimely death, but he won't let Savitar get under his skin like that. He steps forward too, but has to resist the urge to take Iris's hand as he does.
"We'll try to save you, and in return, you'll try to do better.ˮ Barry looks solemnly at him, eyebrows furrowed in seriousness, and nods toward Savitar, "It's better than the alternative of more death. We've both seen too much of that, enough to last a lifetime.ˮ
"Or several,ˮ Savitar corrects, not meeting his eyes again, fiddling with something on the desk that has Cisco twitching. Barry isn't sure if that's Savitar looking for a distraction or an intentional wind-up of Cisco, but he can't let them get sidetracked when they're so close to agreeing.
"Whoever you are now, we'll accept you, if you accept us, as we are now. Not who we were in your future,ˮ Barry states, still trying to get Savitar to meet his gaze.
Caitlin steps forward too, to back him and Iris up in front of Cisco. "I made a promise and I intend to keep it. I'll do everything in my power to save you.ˮ
Barry looks over to Joe, who takes a moment himself to look at each of them, and when he sees something on Iris' face her confirmation seems enough for him. "Sounds fair if he sticks to it, but we will be watching you."
"Me too, discount Two-Face,ˮ Cisco chimes in, miming his fingers to his eyes and then to Savitar. "I wouldn't step out of line, unless you want to see the real power of a Breacher.ˮ
Barry's heart skips a beat at Cisco practically threatening Savitar. He's always known two of the very few people who were a serious threat to The Flash happened to both be his best friends, but he doesn't want to see that play out here, even if it is, from Cisco's perspective, with the evil version of him.
The last few months haven't been easy on any of them. They've had to ask a lot of Cisco – he's seen the awful specter of Killer Frost fighting him, forever worried Caitlin will go to the dark side, and he's had to vibe Iris' death over and over in the name of changing her fate. Was this asking one thing too much of him, to help the man responsible for almost all his recent suffering?
There's a crackle in the air that isn't coming from him and he seriously worries Cisco and Savitar will come to blows over this. Savitar is faster than him, there's no avoiding that, so Barry can't stop him and Wally's gone already. Suddenly he fears what they are getting themselves into if Cisco can't play nice either.
"Cisco, come on. Not now!ˮ Barry pleads with him.
"Oh, so there's an appropriate time for your friend to threaten me?ˮ Savitar snarks, hardly looking threatened. He seems more irked and mildly amused, but that's the purely superficial layer of it. What Barry fears is something well hidden; those acceptable emotions acting as a cover for old wounds that Cisco might still be dangerously picking at.
"I'm sorry, we really do mea-ˮ Barry starts.
"What?! You're sorry?" Cisco interrupts, finding plenty more words for the frustration he isn't holding back any longer . "He's the bad guy! You don't apologize to him .ˮ
"What do you want from me?" Savitar asks dryly and not at all like he cares for the answer. "No one's dying today. No one's dying at all if Barry's to be believed," Savitar points out, motioning to him. "Do I need to wave a white handkerchief or are you going to throw down a glove no matter what I do, Cisquito?ˮ
Cisco bristles at the nickname, one that only Hartley, and more to the point - to the very sensitive point - Dante ever used for him. Barry holds him back from doing anything foolish in the moment and leads a slightly cooled-down Cisco to the furthest corner of The Cortex where Iris joins them to talk it over more in semi-privacy. That leaves Caitlin and Joe thankfully carefully watching Savitar which makes Barry feel somewhat reassured about taking his own attention off of their new guest to placate Cisco.
From the other side of the Cortex, Caitlin can't hear the whole discussion. There's something about 'majority rules' mentioned, which sounds like Barry attempting to put his foot down on the matter, before she turns her attention fully to Savitar because someone needs to be watching him. Right now that's only her and Joe and Joe isn't making any move toward him.
Caitlin observes Savitar take another deep breath and pinch the bridge of his nose as Barry has a hushed argument with Cisco. It's decided, for all intents and purposes, that they are going to help Savitar but Cisco isn't exactly onboard just yet. She's not sure it's helping the tenuous situation to have all his doubts aired in front of the man in question. The tension had ramped back up with Cisco's threat and yet it wasn't the same tension as before, something had shifted. When she looks at him, standing alone there on the other side of the console, he seems to be not so much angry as tired and out of place. Like someone who doesn't know where he belongs and is stuck there defending his position because where else is there to go.
Caitlin is the first to approach him since he arrived, other than Iris. She carefully corners the desk but stands at what she hopes is a respectful, and safe, distance.
"So, you decided to accept our help.ˮ
"Looks that way,ˮ is his bored drawl as he shifts focus back to the now three-way discussion between Iris, Barry, and Cisco. It sounds like Barry is trying earnestly to redirect it back to more of the theoretical science, tempting Cisco's brilliant mind with something to distract him from whatever warning sirens are going off in his head about them daring to trust Savitar.
"I'm glad,ˮ she says genuinely, though it sounds weak to her ears. Helping people has hardly ever been so controversial as it is today. She can't help the afterthought about whether they will remain glad. But she hopes so. Her stomach jumps up into her throat at the thought of it crumbling down, going back to the destiny none of them want.
Iris' voice growing irate with Cisco bleeds through the previous hush suddenly "Look, if he's willing to change, I forgive him, so you should be able to too.ˮ That's when Caitlin sees how Savitar looks at Iris still, despite what he claimed he would do to her. Only allowed now in small snatches of feeling. She can believe then his intended actions were about survival and nothing more, but how does that factor into this new life, where everyone lives, where both he and Iris live?
"How about we get you a check-up, a full physical? Establish a baseline so I can monitor you for any paradox-related changes when the time comes.ˮ
"Great idea,ˮ Barry exclaims loudly, throwing her a grateful look from across the room. Cisco's a little less agitated now but they're still in the danger zone of this all falling apart if they can't get Cisco to start work on a solution soonish. Literal space between him and Savitar might be what's needed for everyone to cool down from this encounter. However, Savitar doesn't seem impressed at her suggestion, looking her up and down as if he finds her lacking now she's not the Frosty version he'd sought out. Despite that, he agrees, probably eager to get away from the drama, and Caitlin tries to damp down the small slither of hurt at being judged lacking, by him of all people.
"Anywhere but here would be an improvement,ˮ he says, fingers lightly touching his temple as if he's trying not to rub there. She suspects he has a headache but is loath to admit it, which means doctoring him is going to be tricky. Possibly trickier than Cisco, who is famously resistant to her dealing with his migraines or nosebleeds. Being a good doctor is where her talents, and confidence, lay; she doesn't care who he is, villainy or not won't change her medical advice.
She thinks she catches a small smile on his face from the corner of her eye as she cautiously walks him over to the medbay and doesn't know why he's so reluctant to let people know he cares that they care.
As she ushers Savitar inside the medbay – with him hesitant to turn his back on either her or the rest of them - Joe pulls her to one side. "I'll be right outside if you need me,ˮ he tells her with a meaningful look. Caitlin doubts that Joe would be a match for Savitar but it's nice to know he still cares, especially after she hid a piece of the stone and played a part in Wally's imprisonment in the Speedforce.
"Thank you, but I think we'll be fine. Like Iris said, if he wanted to hurt any of us he could have already and he hasn't.ˮShe wished that left her feeling better about being alone with him. Their last encounter chilled her, in more than one way, but she wills herself to put that aside. She has a patient to attend to, someone who needs her, as Dr. Caitlin Snow. And right now, that's exactly what she needs to take her mind off everything else. This role she knows well and she just hopes Savitar will let her help him like he has begrudgingly let them more generally.
A teaser for chapter 4... - this will be familiar for anyone who follows my tumblr as I posted it for a Six Sentence Sunday about two weeks ago. I still need to write most of chapter 4 (lots of notes that need extrapolating) but I might post more teasers on my tumblr once it's written more though. Also the good news is that chapter 4 is mostly Savitar & Caitlin interaction coming. :)
"If I'm going to be your doctor, if you're going to be my patient-" again she doesn't voice, "-then I need to know what I'm working with. What your body has been through that Barry's hasn't, what you're capable of."
Instead of the serious answer she was hoping for, Savitar bites back instantly with the weirdly self-deprecating, and somehow simultaneously bragging, snark of "I think you've all got a good idea what I'm capable of."
