radoddish- definitely a weird AU situation! i think in another life it would work :)

guest- dun dun dunNN

read94- nope, it wasn't just you! had a weird glitch when i uploaded three, i couldn't even see the chapter for a few days when i first uploaded it! hopefully everyone can see it now :)

TheMushroomGuild- same, i'm definitely in the camp that it's a halloween movie! christmas movies should make you cozy, and this one doesn't lol

guest- aw thanks so much! i plan to keep writing :)

all about hope- love bonus reviews! i have about two more hectic weeks left and then i'll be free for about a month and a half to update much more freely, so expect more frequent updates soon! also gotta find my copy of TOA lol

ericareyes'sgirlfriend- wow, thank you so much! i appreciate it!

LovelyAstorxia- i totally feel your comment- things have been so crazy lately. i'm glad you feel stable rn tho! and omg i'm so glad you picked up on the jake/rosie thing in FF! that was planting groundwork for this haha. and thank you :))

first leo chapter!


Leo decided that you learn a lot when you spend everyday with a metallic dragon.

One: the satisfaction of never being interrupted wore off quickly. In the three months he had been at sea, on what he believed to be the road trip from hell, he was positive he had lost all of his socialization skills. He had even made a fake face for his tool belt, Bert, ala Wilson from Castaway. What had started as an ironic joke was turning into him considering Ernie to be an actual friend, which was….concerning.

Two: the ocean was boring. Like, mind-boggling boring. It was impossible to play I Spy if the ocean was the only thing as far as the eye could see.

Three: despite everyone telling him he couldn't grow a beard, he currently was, so take that. Okay, so maybe it was more wispy stubble...still counted in his opinion.

Four: he could only eat so much Fonzie's.

Leo sighed, flipping up the access panel on Festus. Day by day, he was tracking magic islands, which sounded much cooler than it actually was. Who knew there were so many freaking uninhabited magic islands?

When he was younger, Leo had gone through a Hardy Boys phase, making his mom read the books over and over to him constantly. He had solved the first grade mystery of who stole his juice box (Spoiler alert: it was that jerk Derek Gates). Mysteries were like machines; they just needed a fix. The "fix" he was searching for currently was: Where was Max Reiger?

He had leads. There was a kid's shoe on the island of Keros. He found a pile of sand toys on an island off the coast of Mozambique. Little things that just told him Max had to have been there.

He was getting closer. Leo had to believe that.

His eyes drooped in the poor lighting, and he wondered when he had last gotten sleep. If he had to guess, it had been awhile. He didn't like to shut his eyes, not even for a second. Leo was constantly looking over his shoulder, waiting for the next sign of danger. He already had his fair share of run-ins with monsters. He kept expecting a huge lightning bolt (courtesy of Zeus) to shoot him out of the sky.

"Alright, Festus," Leo muttered, the sleep winning. "Autopilot mode."

Festus creaked, his eyes glowing bright red, beacons shining before them in the darkness of the night. A radio he had installed within Festus started playing engine noise- it was the only way he could sleep, he hated the eerie silence of the open sea.

He pulled out a thin sheet of paper out of his tool belt. Unfolding it carefully, he ran his thumb over the drawing.

"Goodnight, Freckles," he muttered.

The smell of strawberries was overwhelming. There was only one place he associated with that smell: Camp Half-Blood. He could see satyrs having a volleyball game, campers cheering them on the sidelines.

And there were his friends.

Beauty Queen was laughing at something Jason was saying, giving him a good-natured shove. Percy and Annabeth were there, looking to be in a heated debate about something. Even Frank and Hazel were there, handing out grilled cheeses to everyone.

And there was Rosie.

She was sitting slightly off to the side, her face creased in concentration. She looked like she had an idea on the cusp of her tongue.

Leo wanted to join them. But everytime he took a step forward, he went nowhere. It was like walking on a treadmill, getting distance but never going anywhere.

"Guys?" he called out. No one even looked in his direction. "Guys!"

No one could hear him. It was like he didn't even exist. He was standing right there, and no one could hear him.

Leo woke up with a start, sweat pooling on his forehead. It was always the same dream, short-lived but scary everytime.

He sent several holographic scrolls to camp the week he had woken up. You know, the usual, "SIKE, I'M NOT DEAD!" scrolls. Leo couldn't just spell it out in plain words, though...as far as the gods were concerned, he was dead.

So he put it in code. Morse code, to be specific. One of the last things he had said to Rosie was, "Everyone knows a lighthouse is how you get home". He coded that onto one of his holographic scrolls, sending it camp's way. It was inconspicuous enough that only Rosie would understand it.

He started becoming worried when September rolled around and there was no kind of response. He thought search parties would go out blazing. He thought his friends would come and help him. But it was like he didn't exist.

Something was off- he couldn't put his finger on it, but….there had to be a reason he couldn't get in touch with anyone.

Otherwise...well, Leo didn't want to think of the other reason. That, perhaps, everyone had moved on- maybe no one cared anymore.

Time was hard to keep track of; the days bled into one another. It felt like he had been gone a hundred years.

But, if his calculations were right, it was only November 1st.

Day of the Dead.

The souls are awake today, his mom would say.

His radar blinked, green dots coming from the edge.

"We've got company, Buddy," he muttered to Festus. "Dim your lights."

Festus' eyes went dim, as his engine noises stopped. Hopefully, they were virtually invisible now.

He could hear something coming closer, the sound of flapping wings. Along with the flapping wings came the sound of his heartbeat, thumping fearfully through his shirt.

Ba-boom. Ba-boom.

Pull it together, he told himself. It's probably nothing.

But, as the demigod world would have it, "probably nothing" usually meant "something ready to destroy Leo".

The screeches came into view, and once Leo's eyes adjusted, he groaned.

"Oh, not you handbags, again!" he grumbled, sounding like an eldery man shaking his fist at the rowdy neighborhood kids.

Furies descended down upon him, the three, leathery old things that had been stalking him for weeks. Even though he had gone to extreme lengths to make sure none of the gods knew he was alive…..turns out Hades knew he cheated the system. And boy, was that creepy psycho mad.

The furies had whips this time, and Leo couldn't help but feel slightly jealous- out of all the gadgets he did have in his belt, a whip wasn't one of them.

One of the furies bared their fangs at him, cracking the whip down viciously. An embarrassingly high-pitched scream came out of Leo's mouth, as he steered Festus into a sharp left. Festus roared, a stream of fire sent towards the old hags' ways.

"Hell yeah, buddy!" Leo whooped, as Festus' eyes glinted.

Another fury hissed, snapping her whip again, a stream of fire coming towards Leo and Festus.

He loudly cursed, veering Festus out of the way.

Of course they had fire. He should've known his one talent would also be possessed by an evil fury.

He balled up his fist, flames dancing up and down his arm. With all his force, he threw the fire towards the furies, scattering the three of them into three opposite directions.

Festus suddenly plunged down, Leo yelping as he grabbed onto his neck. Leo quickly flipped open the control panel, flipping several switches. Some people looked at his complex gadgets, and were overwhelmed. Leo, however, knew them like the back of his hand. He knew what every switch in Festus did- even as they were currently plunging towards the ocean, he felt pride at his creation.

Festus' stabilizers kicked in, and suddenly his dragon roared, heading up towards the sky.

The furies reacted to this quickly, swooping down upon Leo. He felt a talon grip his hair, as he angrily conjured a ball of fire, throwing it upward. The fury wailed in anger, definitely taking out a good chunk of Leo's hair as it let him go.

Suddenly, he heard a rumbling sound, one that was growing exponentially louder. For a second, he thought of the only person he knew who could conjure earthquakes. For a brief second, he had hope, flickering like a flame.

However, that flame quickly sputtered out as a blur of color whizzed past his head, as Leo heard cheerful whooping.

The figure gleefully cackled, colliding with one of the furies. The fury wailed, and its friends quickly descended down on the two of them, surrounding them.

Leo took this as his chance, quickly steering Festus away from the commotion.

"Not so fast!"

BOOM.

The entire sky shook, as Leo was nearly thrown off Festus. Liquid spattered onto the two of them. Monster goop- gross.

"Leo Valdez! Just the man I was looking for!"

He recognized that tone. It was the tone of every teacher right before they were about to scold him. It was the tone that made every instinct in his body scream run.

Leo quickly lit his arm, giving himself a light source.

"Yoo-hoo!" The figure approached, and Leo gulped nervously, taking in the sight of the middle-aged man wearing a jogging suit and winged shoes.

Hermes- the god of travelers, thieves, and trade.

"Hermes! Mi amigo!" Leo said, laughing nonchalantly, hoping he was coming off as breezy. "How you been?"

Hermes waggled a finger at him. "Now don't talk to me like that, son. You know why I'm here."

"You wanted to compare methods of transportation? Because, no offense, I totally win."

Hermes frowned. "These are the newest model," he said, peering down at his shoes.

"Huh- maybe you should get your money back."

"Maybe I should- hey, wait a minute, I know what you're doing!" Hermes said, pointing his finger accusingly. "Stop distracting me! You, Leo Valdez, are supposed to be dead."

He feigned confusion. "Now that doesn't sound right."

"Did you, or did you not, blow up in defeating Mother Earth?"

Leo winced. "Now, see, blowing up is a graphic description..."

"You're acting pretty pompous for someone who just got saved by me." Hermes' eyes were getting darker, and Leo knew he was pushing his luck.

"I mean, to be fair, you only saved me to get me into more trouble."

"You cheated death, kiddo! I don't deal with cheaters of death! I'm the one who takes you to the Underworld, and guess what?! If I don't bring you there, Hades whines non-stop! So, you are coming with me."

He thought of the Hermes kids from camp...hell, he liked the Hermes kids from camp. They were always down for pranking….and tricks.

"Listen, Hermes," Leo said in a serious tone. "You're right. I cheated death. Totally breaks all the rules...but isn't that the best part? Don't you love tricking people?"

Hermes paused, his eyes widening. "Huh. I do love tricks….and boy, this is definitely one of the better ones of the year…"

"Can you really blame me, then? How about we let this slide?" Leo said, trying to pull off his best "I'm innocent" look.

"Well...I guess we could." Hermes frowned. "Hey, wait, no, we can't! Stop distracting me! You're supposed to be dead!"

Okay, time for a new approach.

"Well," Leo started. "I am...doing this for love. Some would say it's romantic…" He shot a hopeful smile at Hermes.

Hermes made a disgusted face. "Bah, who cares? Listen, if you come easily, your belongings can be on my priority shelf!" A box suddenly appeared out of thin air, as Hermes started rummaging through it. "I've collected so much from past souls. Let's see, we got a magic mirror, magic toothbrush, magic pair of dentures- not too sure about that one-magic phone-"

"Hold on." Leo perked up. "Magic phone?" He liked the sound of that.

"Oh, sure." Hermes produced the phone- it was a red, bulky receiver. "It can reach anyone in the world, at any time. No numbers needed- just think….and boom."

Leo almost felt himself combust. A phone- that's what he needed, he was sure of it. Whatever was going on, a magic phone could help him. He could reach Rosie. Hell, maybe he could even reach Max, wherever he was.

Hermes smiled, continuing to rummage through the box. "I really do love my collection. It's the best part of traveling- everything I've accumulated."

Leo had one last Hail Mary under his belt. It probably wasn't going to work...but he was known to try anything and everything under the sun.

Hermes loved collecting. Hermes loved trades.

"Listen up," Leo told him. "I have a proposition for you."