Major freak-out in 3...2...1...
"Oooh my God! Allison, what am I going to do?!" The test slips from my fingers and lands in the sink. My hands go up to my head and begin tugging and pulling at my hair. I pace the bathroom (which is only a single, so there isn't a lot of walkng space.) "I'm pregnant...I'm pregnant...I'M PREGNANT!"
"Whoa, whoa, hey; calm down." Allison replies, rushing over to me. She gently disentangles my hands from my hair. Her eyes are filled with worry as she looks into mine. "What do you mean you're pregnant?"
Our roles have switched-now she's the calm one while I am a panicked mess.
"Just that," my voice trembles. I point to the test, not wanting to touch the vile thing ever again. "I'm pregnant!" I walk away from Allison and sit down on the toilet. I begin to cry from fear, from anxiety, from everything. Shudders rack my body as I try to hide my tears, but it doesn't work, they come pouring down like a waterfall. I peek out from underneath my hands to look at Allison. She's staring at the test in shock.
"Pregnant," she mumbles. "You're pregnant..." Allison turns to look at me. "H-how Amy? Well I mean I know "how", but just-argh!"
Despite the situation, I laugh at Allison's rambling.
Allison, her visage static, kneels at the toilet seat in front of me. "Amy..." her words drizzle off, unable to form a proper sentence.
I smile at her, tears still leaking from my eyes. "Explanation. You want an explanation, right?"
She nods. "W-who is the father, Amy? Not that I'm saying you have sex with just anybody-I-I mean...it's just I thought you were going to wait for marriage...or something..."
"It's Jack's, of course." I gasp out, ignoring the rest of her comments. I can't help but feel guilty towards myself. I was going to wait for marriage to have sex. It's just some things happened...
Allison's face immediately brightens. "Oh, that's good, Amy. Jack, your boyfriend-perfect! It's not like you weren't planning on not having a future with him. And he's a good guy, Amy, he'll accept this baby." Then Allison's face darkens with realization. "Unless...you want to get an abortion..."
I sigh. "No, Allison. I'm not going to get an abortion." Unconsciously, I rest a hand against my stomach. "My baby is in here. My baby. I'm not going to get rid of it. I could care less for the challenges ahead. I have my parents-" I cringe at the thought of having to tell them "-I have my teachers-" my mind goes to one in particular "-and I have you." I look at Allison expectantly. "You will help me right? I don't think I could not use your help right now."
"Of course, Amy, I love you. We're practically sisters. And I don't abandon family." Allison gives me a reassuring smile. "But what about Jack? You didn't mention him at all in your list..."
I knew this day would come when I'd have to tell her the truth about our relationship. "Allison," I take her hand in mine, "Jack and I...well, we aren't doing so well."
Allison's face loses some of it's brightness. "What's gong on?"
I scoff, unable to hold it back. "That 'good guy' you mentioned, is anything but." Anger boils somewhere in my heart. "He may apear to be good and beautiful, but it's only a facade, Allison; a mask to keep his true ugliness away, to hide the mosnter deep inside."
"Is he abusing you?" Allison's voice has changed to a threatening tone.
I shake my head. "Not in the way you're thinking of."
In the corner of my eye, I see Allison's chest sink down, releasing a long breath. "Tell me, Amy. What has he done?"
My eyes start to glaze over from past memories. "In the beginning..." I start, "everything was so perfect...beautiful..."
Six months ago...
Calm down, Amy! I command myself. It's not like you haven't done this before!
No matter how provocative these words may be, they are not at all what they seem to be...
This is your second year in college, not your first. Get over these little Freshman gitterbugs! I shake my head in self-disapproval. No matter what year of school it is, whether it's fifth grade or seventh grade or tenth or eleventh, I manage to sweat myself crazy with nerves. At least I know what to expect this year.
Last year took me by surprise; I wasn't expecting the constant studying, or the strenuous essays, or the large, obnoxious parties. By the time I was in my second month of my freshman year in college..I was a zombie, practically dead. I swear I even saw flies buzzing around my head. I was wondering how I would survive. There is one word to answer that: Allison Luna.
Allison Luna-my roomate, my best friend, and the best eye-roller in the country: my savior. When I first met her Freshman year, I didn't think it would be possibe for us to get along; we were-are-complete opposites!
She is a blonde-haired goddess with a body Aphrodite would kill for: skinny, with subtle curves and small but perky breasts, and a perfect tan that matches the shade of her light brown eyes. Everything about her was perfection, her angelic visage, her hair, nails, feet...you name it. All was perfect. And with that perfection, she holds high confidence in herself and a perky, out-going, fun personality. Allison is entertaining, smart, and a Christian, but most importantly, she is kind hearted.
At first, I did not know that about her. I thought she was a-ahem-a bitch.
And most of my thinking and judgement (and I am not usually a judgemental person) came from instant jealousy. I felt like a complete fat and frumpy dork around her, and I hated it! So I did everything I could to not become friends with her. But nothing stopped her. She continuously pursued my friendship, and boy am I glad she never gave up.
The first doubt of my judgment towards her appeared when I saw her working at a day-care center. I was looking for a job at the time and I love kids, so I thought I'd take a look there. I wasn't too pleased when I saw her working there as well. But something melted my heart when I saw her tending this wounded little boy. His cheeks were tear-stained, his eyes red from crying. Allison placed him on top of a table, her face bent toward his knee where small droplets of blood were running down.
"Now, Jake," Allison soothes the boy, "can you now see why we have that 'no running' rule?"
Jake nods, sniffing a blubbery slurp. "Yes..."
"You aren't in trouble, nor are you going to be punished. This is a good lesson for you." Allison looks at the boy as she rips open a Spongebob band-aid. "Will you make me proud by following that rule? I don't like seeing you, or any one of my little peeps, get hurt."
The boy nods again and Allison puts on the band-aid. "There," she mumbles to herself, "all done." The boy examins his knee with interest, using his finger to outline the band-aid. "Jake, would you like a lollipop?" Allison holds out three different flavors: lime, cherry, and lemon.
The boy nods earnestly, his mouth hanging open.
"Which flavor?"
"Yellow."
Allison plucks the "yellow" flavored lollipp from her hand and gives it to Jake. This was the first time I saw Allison in a different light. I thought that maybe, deep down, she did have a good heart.
I didn't apply for the job though.
The time my heart changed about her completely was when I saw her rescue this boy at our school getting bullied. I just walked into the cafeteria when I realized that there was a huge crowd swarmed around in the middle. What's going on? I thought. I headed toward the crowd, pushing my way through to get myself to the front.
I couldn't believe my eyes. Who knew Aphrodite herself would have such morals, especiall in front of a crowd.
"You jerk! You bastard! Why don't you leave the poor guy alone?!" Allison is face-to-face with the brawniest boy I've ever seen. He looked like he was a weight lifter. My eyes widen in amusement and pure shock. On the ground I see a poor boy with glasses hanging from one ear, his face down, his eyes closed, his breathing harsh. Blood is pouring from his nose. The ground is covered with utensils, salad, and milk.
My observations are interrupted when a deep voice speaks up. "Yeah, and what's a tiny thing like you going to do about it?"
The intimidation technique... I think to myself. How trite.
"You just can't bully people," Allison starts up again, not backing down. "Do you know how damaging it is to a person's soul?"
I know now that Allison wants to be a psychiatrist. After this performance, I can see that she will be dedicated to her job.
"No and I don't care. He's a wimp and dork." The guy says.
He's starting to make me really pissed off.
"The boy could dig his own grave for all I care!" He looked like he was going to pummel Allison if she didn't move soon.
That's it. I hate it when things go by without justice. I may not have the confidence Allison has, or the beauty, but I'm not going to just stay here and do nothing!
Gathering up my courage and all the confidence I can gather, I walk out next to Allison. "Why don't you dig your own!" The cafeteria is dead silent.
Allison looks at me with curiosity and surprise. I look at her and smile. Why don't we make this a truce between us? Though I said this message to her with my eyes, I know she understood because she smiled back at me with equal warmth. The two of us faced this big bully together and we won.
We were also taken to the Principle's office for "fighting." I couldn't believe it. I've never been taken to the principle's office before.
At least I am there for a good reason.
After that, Allison and I got along perfectly, we became best buds-sisters! We are-
Present day...
"Amy, I know this already!" Allison lightly shouts at me, interrupting my story. "You're telling me stuff that I participated in!"
I glare at her. "Shush!"
Allison rolls her eyes, but follows my command.
"I'll skip some of it, alright?"
"Go to the part where you start a relationship with Jack," she demands.
I nod. "Okay. Well, you know how we met. It was in drama class, and no one wanted to partner up with me, right?" Allison nods her head. "He did and I thought he was gorgeous..and he still is!" Jack Crowe is the most beautiful man I'd ever layed eyes on: blond hair, blue eyes, a deep tan, muscles...I drooled when I first saw him. Literally. It was embarrassing. "Well, we immediately developed a connection toward one another; we became very close. And we eventually became a couple..."
Six months ago...
I was staring at the amazing angel in front of me. How could I be this lucky to find a guy as caring and generous as him? And what's even more amazing is that Allison, my best friend, my sister, liked him, too. And so do my parents. Now that was a miracle.
We were celebrating my birthday at this restaurant just down the road from our college. It was Italian and it was delicious. But not as delicious as you... I thought as I continued to stare deamily at him.
Jack was ordering food for me and him-I told him what I wanted a few minutes ago and he remembered exactly what I wanted.
The waitress leaves and Jack turns back to look at me. "Hey, birthday girl." He smiles at me and I smile at him. I scoot closer to him. We are sitting in a booth, so all I do is slide next to him. I cuddle against him and he wraps an arm around me. I sigh against his shoulder. Even with his big muscles he is still soft and warm.
I also get cold easily, so it's nice to have a personal heater.
I hear Jack swallow hard. "Amy, there's a question that's been burning on my tongue for a while."
I look up at him. "What is it?"
He's uncomfortable. I can tell because of the small twitch that began disturbing his right eye. It's a quirk I discovered quickly, and I find it adorable.
"Well..." Jack looks me in the eyes. "We've known each other for how long now?"
I think back. "Four weeks..."
He nods. "We became great friends quickly, and I trust you like I've never trusted anyone before." His words warmed my heart. "I think we both know that we have...feelings for each other."
I nod, a blush spreading along my cheeks. "Yes..."
"I-I want to continue being with you...forever, Amy."
My eyes widen.
"I want you to be my girlfriend and I'd be honored if you would accept me to be your boyfriend." Jack looks at me in the eyes, his are filled with earnest, exposed feelings and slight worry of rejection. He, however, had nothing to fear.
I feel tears come into my eyes. "Oh, Jack. Of course!" I jump at him, squeezing him with my arms. Jack gives a startled laugh that soon becomes heart-felt.
"Amy..." I hear him whisper. We both pull back. I look at him, my eyes are, no doubt, filled with little hearts. Then he did something that made my breath stop.
My first kiss happened right there. Tingles crept from my lips and made a path down my body. Our kiss, which was suppose to be small and simple, became heated much too quickly. I pull away from him fast, my chest heaving from elation.
Jack looks at me concerned. "Is everything okay?"
I nod, feeling embarrassed at myself for almost giving the whole restaurant a show. "I'm fine, it's just...Jack." I take a breath. "I'm the kind of person who-what I mean to say is-" Jack looks at me expectantly. I open my mouth, then close it again, unsure how to form my words.
You need to tell him, I tell myself. He needs to know. It's only fair.
"Go ahead and say it, Amy. We are together now and we need to talk about how we feel." Jack assures me.
I look away from him and bite my lip. "Jack, I-I'm not..." I sigh and try again. "Jack, I'm a virgin." My cheeks flame. Oh joy.
"Okay." That's the only thing he says. I'm guessing that's his way of saying 'go on.'
"And I still plan to be one, that is, until after my wedding day." I say this slowly and as lightly as possible. I hope this won't end our relationship or threaten it. I know Jack is not a virgin. He has had plenty of girls in his past; I'm probably the first who would deny him sex before maritals.
Jack looks at me silently for a very long time. My fingers start to pick at my nails. "Amy...Amy look at me."
I do.
"I'm not going to force myself on you." He takes hold of my hand. "I find it admirable that you want to wait; I will honor your wishes."
I smile at him.
"As long as if you are by my side and you grant me kisses and hugs and cuddles," he laughs when I give him a sheepish look, "then I'll be alright."
I nod to him. "Thank you."
There began our relationship. I felt like the luckiest woman in the world. I had a handsome, kind, considerate, smart boyfriend. That day we celebrated two things: the day of my birth and the birth of our relationship. Everything was so perfect...the key word being "was".
Present Day...
Allison is silent as she listens to my story. "And this is the same man who's been.. "abusing" you?" she asks skeptically. I can see why she's as confused as I was. I thought Jack was kind and considerate-how far from the truth!
"Trust me, Allison, no one could masquerade their monstrous appearance as well as he can."
