CHAPTER FOUR

Grisha Jaeger clutched the reins of his steed with a numbingly tight grip, his body tilted forward as he urged his horse to run faster.

His hands, drenched with the rain and pale from the cold, shook uncontrollably as the storm overhead increased in intensity. His eyes, bloodshot and wide, stared directly forward as the steed's muddy hooves pounded down the dirt road.

Not many people knew that Grisha was a strongly emotional and irrational person, and no one would have guessed that Eren Jaeger had inherited his recklessness from his father either. The truth was, despite portraying himself as a calm and logical person, Grisha was always a deeply troubled man.

He found himself frequently reliving his old memories before coming to the walls, the torture, the brutal living conditions of the internment zone, watching his beloved wife being gruesomely ripped away from him, Grisha was no stranger to overwhelming grief. Yet it all paled to the obscure and chilling prophecies shown to him through the power of the Attack Titan.

Even as his hands trembled tremendously, his heart beating at a rapid and irregular rate, deep down he knew this was bound to happen. It was shown to him, he'd already lived the future. And yet, why did it come as such a shock when he received the news?

Why did he feel so… empty?

He'd return to Trost to find that Eren had survived, but Carla had not. He'd pass on the Attack and the Founder, and Eren would carry the weight of Eldia's future on his shoulders. Grisha would need to die.

This was no surprise, Grisha had been planning this for years. Yet, some stubborn part of him still within his beating heart which he thought had rotted away long ago felt great remorse and sadness.

Sadness at not being able to watch his son grow old. Sadness that he would end up turning, or rather, forcing Eren into a m̶o̶n̶s̶t̶e̶r hero for Eldia. Sadness that he would never feel the warm and loving embrace of his wife again. Regret at how he raised his first son.

Grisha could not help but feel he had squandered his own life too many times to count, and he was rushing forward to squander it one final time.

As lights began to break out from the gaps in between the trees, Grisha snapped himself back to reality as he stared back towards the dirt path. There was no time for him to regret his past decisions, what was done, was done. He was too far in to turn back now.

The path ended as it converged with a properly paved cobblestone road, a turn of Grisha's head revealed that Trost's gate was just ahead. Multiple military carriages and servicemen gathered in tents near the gate, carefully letting the occasional merchant exit through with their goods. He supposed that the extra manpower was for security's sake, though he could only imagine the cramped conditions of the refugee centers within Trost.

Grisha did not need to wait long to pass through, as there was a very short line for those entering Trost. A quick show of his medical certificates easily got him past the checkpoint, and Grisha strode through the gates on his horse to enter Trost.

A long line of merchants and civilians alike stood in front of the gate, stretching out for as long as the road went until it disappeared behind a corner. Grisha supposed that having the titans so close to them made them feel apprehensive of another breach and would cause a flood of civilians to flood deeper into the walls.

…wasn't that funny? In the future…

Grisha shook out his thoughts before steering his horse away from the line of people, moving opposite to the frantic crowd that filled the too narrow street.

He'd seen this. He knew it was bound to happen. Grisha was certain of the future, and had planned for it for years. He'd prepared for Eren his journal, the cellar equipped with the information Eren would need to finish his mission. The memories showed him what would happen.

Yet… he still felt as if this were a dream, as if he rubbed his eyes hard enough he'd wake up and the crushing weight of his guilt on his chest would be lifted.

Eventually, his horse became irritated by the swathes of civilians that pushed and shoved in order to gain a further spot in line. He had no choice but to tie his horse at the nearest Inn, to spare himself and the poor creature any potential accidents.

Grisha was forced to tread on foot, gracelessly fighting against the tide of refugees and civilians alike. He let out a sharp wheeze as a random stranger's elbow slammed into his gut, causing him to curl over and clutch at a wall for support.

'No time! I must find Eren!' He mentally reprimanded himself, gritting his teeth before forcing himself to once again march through the throng of civilians. Grisha was not a large man by any means, but the determination to see his mission through to its end fueled him with irregular power, letting him push against the relentless tide of people.

Just when he thought his legs would give out from under him after another hard object bludgeoned his thigh, Grisha spotted a familiar face amongst the Crowd. Mustering up his strength, Grisha raised his arm and called out, his voice piercing through the commotion. "KEITH!"

The man in question snapped his head around, a haunted look on his face. There was no time to dwell on it, as Grisha renewed his efforts to close the distance between him and his old friend. Keith would surely know where the refugees were being kept.

【 LINE BREAK】

As Grisha passed through a second checkpoint with Keith to enter the refugee center, he began to steel his mind as he passed countless grief-stricken faces, walking through dank halls that he remembered though he had never walked through them before. His memories told him where he had to go, providing him with a dizzy sense of deja vu with every step he took.

And then he saw Eren, asleep in a pile of cloth with his two friends and Armin's grandfather. His heart felt like it was being crushed with his own two hands, as Grisha neared his son.

"Eren…" He spoke softly, his tone of voice conflicting against the livid expression of his face. Eren stirred but did not wake up. 'Eren, where is your mother?'

Grisha knew where Carla was. She was gone, Eren would say that she was eaten by a Titan. What would be the point of asking?

And yet, Grisha opened his mouth to wake Eren and ask, until he heard someone call his name. He didn't react until he felt a hand upon his shoulder.

"D-doctor Jaeger!"

Grisha turned to meet the eyes of a middle aged man striding towards him, his dark hair graying at the sides with the beginning of wrinkles on his face. Grisha pondered on whether he knew the man or not, before faintly recalling that he had at some point treated him for foot sores. The man continued, "Oh, it's really you! Doctor, you must come quickly!"

He turned, gripping Grisha by the arm. Grisha hardly resisted, in shock as he let himself get dragged away before planting his feet onto the ground. "What? W-where?" Keith startled behind him for a moment, before swiftly gaining behind the two.

"Your wife, Carla!"

Grisha's heart felt like it was but a bloody pulp at this point, as he ducked his head, ready to hear the news of Carla's passing. How strange. He was sure that he would be hearing it from Eren.

"You must see her, she was asking for you!"

What?

It was a blur, following after the man who'd introduced himself as Gideon. He rushed through the stinking stables that constituted a sanctuary for the refugees with Keith on his tail, his mind a blur as he felt his legs move on their own.

It was impossible. Grisha had lived through this countless times. He knew what would happen, the Attack Titan's ability was absolute.

Gideon was mistaken, it must've been another Carla in the district. This was a waste of time. Why was he still following this man?

Grisha was led into a military hospital, cramped with stressed clinical personnel and grieving families.

Each beat of his heart punched against his ribcage hard enough to make him lightheaded and nauseous. But it was overpowered by a foreign emotion that sparked within his chest, filling him with strength and urging him onward. Hope.

Gideon led Grisha into a hospital wing, two rows of beds lining both sides of the wide corridor. Scattered about were survivors of the breach, surrounded by family members that wept over missing limbs or fading heartbeats.

Grisha scanned through the rows, his heart pounding loud enough to block all other sounds. His vision began to gray at the sides, his breathing picking up as Gideon led him further into the room.

Then, he stopped in front of a bed. His world around him was colorless and quiet, and Grisha stood in front of his wife's hospital bed as pale as a ghost.

Her leg was elevated from the bed, wrapped tightly in a hard cast. Numerous bruises and cuts covered her face, and bandages were wrapped around all her limbs. But her chest rose, slowly and steadily.

Carla. His beautiful wife. She was alive.

As Gideon urged Keith and himself out of the room to grant them privacy, Grisha placed his hands on the bed, his breath caught in his throat. His hand snaked up the hard mattress, before softly pressing against Carla's relatively uninjured foot.

He saw Carla's eyes flutter open, brows creased in exhaustion as she locked her tired eyes with his. "...Grisha?" She murmured breathlessly.

Grisha began to wail.

~POV CHANGE~

I looked upward, watching a vast and infinite sky alight with countless stars. My hands played with the fine sand around me, as I continued to stare blankly at the scenery before me.

My jaw clenched as I hid my face behind my hands. "Ffffgghhhh…." I groaned, "Idiot, braindead, doofus!"

I rolled around in the sand, pounding my fists into the ground as I continued my childish tantrum. As testament to my foolishness, the pillar of light that constituted the paths was entirely changed, the previously neat and mesmerizingly intricate paths had been changed into countless more twisted tendrils, branching off from one another and reaching further into the sky than before.

What was I thinking?

Carla's death was arguably one of the most pivotal moments in Attack on Titan; it was meant to happen in order for the future to play out as it was meant to. I didn't intend on changing things so quickly. Even then, I never could've foretold that such a simple action could change the course of the future so much.

"Why! Are! You! So! Stupid!" I slammed my head into sand in frustration, tugging at my brown locks. If I'd only decided to think through my decision, I could've possibly found a way to save Carla without causing such a dramatic change to the future.

I didn't necessarily regret saving anyone. I did however regret basically outing myself on day three of being reborn and not thinking my actions through, thus throwing any kind of fore knowledge I had out of the window.

Sitting up, I tried to rationalize. Even before Carla's death, Eren was motivated to join the Survey Corps. Especially after his home being overrun by the titans, surely he'd still hold the same grudge against the enemies outside the walls, right?

But- Grisha Jaeger. He was an outlier. Would he still give Eren the Attack Titan, with Carla still alive? Would seeing his wife alive kill whatever motivation to complete the mission he has left? Would he seek me out? I had no information, any knowledge I had of what was bound to happen was now at question.

Not to mention I couldn't recruit Eren's help, or any of the 104th until five years into the future. What was I supposed to do for five years?!

Especially with the news of my existence, I'd likely have to live out these five years in hiding from the Survey Corps, as it was quite literally impossible to communicate ANYTHING to them.

"How? How do you fuck shit up this bad?" I asked myself, clawing at my face as I groaned in self loathing.

…Was it impossible to communicate with them?

I removed my hands from my face, staring at the mind breaking mess that was the paths, looming overhead. An extra dimensional connection to every Eldian alive and that has ever lived, surely that would provide some method of communication?

I certainly didn't want to do whatever Eren did and broadcast my thoughts to every Eldian, even if I could funnel that ability to a select few it would be much too hard to explain such a thing to people who don't even know that humanity lives outside the walls.

Wasn't that a thought. 'Should I fill them in on everything early?' No.

I'd already made enough of a mess of the plot already. Worst comes to worst, the warrior trio may not even enter the military if they catch news of my existence, knocking the whole timeline haywire.

I just had to hope hard that I didn't screw up badly enough that Eren and Co. don't join the military. Honestly, as far as I could tell, the most important thing I had to ensure happened was that one way or another, the Attack Titan was passed on to Eren.

Or… If I ate Grisha, would I be able to turn human?

I killed the thought immediately. First of all, I had no clue as to how to enter the walls in the first place- being thirteen or so meters tall. Second, there was no telling if eating Grisha would even do anything to me; how bad would it be if I ate Eren's father with nothing to show and no explanation? And third, I truly did not fancy the idea of chewing on a human, no matter how much the emptiness of my stomach bothered me.

I spared a glance down to my stomach, rubbing it as I mourned my ability to eat normal food. I'd be satiated with just a loaf of bread, anything really if just to feel full again. In this form, I didn't necessarily feel 'hungry', but there was a noticeable void in my stomach, preventing me from feeling comfortably full.

Away from the blood and violence, this void became even more noticeable.

"Wonder if I'll ever be human again." I spoke my thoughts out loud, stretching out my cheeks as if I'd be able to morph the flesh like play dough.

That's when I sat up, and realized something. I cupped my hand, grabbing a fistful of sand.

The grains of sand… were normal. I could see them, they weren't small to the point of insignificance.

Somehow- I had not noticed that while in The Paths, I returned to my ordinary human scale. Not my body though, as I looked down towards enough muscle to put any professional athlete to shame.

Was I human in the paths? I guessed not, evident by my lack of genitalia. Everytime I pondered on that, my heart made a violent twist in response.

I'd never fall in love, I'd never have a family, I'd never be human…

Smacking my hands against my cheeks, I forced myself to stop the deprecating thoughts. At the very least, I had an absolutely killer figure- and even more lethal right hook. It was then that I was suddenly graced with the remembrance that a significantly large number of people had seen me buck naked today.

Stone faced, I got to my feet, erasing the thoughts from my head immediately to prevent a mental breakdown.

Climbing over a steep sand dune, I supposed I should at least try to do something with my time here in The Paths, without getting sucked into the storm of memories like last time. I could still feel the faint pull towards the pillar of light, which would connect me with millions of minds both deceased and alive if I let it drag me in.

It wasn't strong enough to really bother me though.

I began to walk through the sands, relishing in the bizarre sensation of weightlessness and utter peace. There was no sound here, even the ground underfoot made no noise with each step. While it should've been disconcerting, it instead served to make the experience seem even more otherworldly and calm.

"Grisha!" I called out, broadcasting my voice by cupping my hands around my mouth. "Grisha! How do I connect to your head!?"

"Is it a contact thing? Do I need to find your personal ID first?"

"Or is it like Bluetooth? What's your device name, Grisha?"

"Pairing… The Bluetooth device has connected successfully."

I fell into silence, plopping down onto my butt. "I think I'm going insane." I muttered, scratching at my nose.

I supposed that whatever connection I shared with the paths wasn't vocally activated. I instead decided to direct my focus upon the faint, telepathic pull at the back of my mind that had been in my consciousness since my appearance here.

I sat still, focusing on the omnipresent link that ushered me toward the pillar of light. It felt almost tangible, as if I could reach out and grab it.

And so, I raised my hand- simultaneously reaching with my mind, and grabbed onto the mental bind. I felt what seemed like an electric shock at my nape and nearly let go, before I began to process the information running through my head.

I felt just as I had before, with almost infinite information laid in front of me, a library of memories that stretched beyond my imagination. But this time, instead of flooding my mind beyond my control, it remained just… there. Accessible, as long as I held onto what I now dubbed 'the brain link'.

Awe began to fill my body from the overwhelming amount of information just at arm's length. It filled me with an indescribable feeling, as if I'd found exactly what I was looking for all my life without knowing it, or as if I'd just opened my spiritual third eye and discovered the meaning behind life. I was able to see the paths up close now, a fantastic kaleidoscope of memories and people stretching out in front of me, individual streams of light- each their own person and time.

What did I want again? It was becoming hard to remember. Right, Grisha. Grisha Jaeger.

How was I supposed to single out one person out of a sea of memories? Each time I tentatively reached out towards the mental archive, I stopped just short out of an instinctual apprehension, as if I were about to touch a live wire.

Perhaps it was better not to meddle with the paths like this just yet, at least until I had some idea of what I was capable of.

But what good was this power for if I never used it?

"Grisha Jaeger." I spoke, bizarrely with my mouth shut, my voice echoing throughout the web of memories and individuals as an other-worldly resonance. I felt no response, my voice disappearing into the seemingly infinite void.

'O-kay, let's try something else.' I amplified whatever connection I shared with the brain link-nearly slipping into the whirlwind of the paths- as I began to differentiate between individual memories and personalities within the web.

My concentration waning by the second, I hastily threw together a vague image of Grisha from what I could remember from the show. Straight brown hair, a long face heavy with wisdom and regret, his eyeglasses, his past in Marley, anything I could put together about his character.

The result was a static that buzzed wildly in my mind, growing louder the further I pushed myself. I gritted my teeth, trying harder to image Grisha in my head but to no avail. In a lapse of my focus, I thought of Carla. Carla, who stared at me with fear and apprehension first; before looking up to me with admiration and gratefulness.

Carla, who despite being injured did all she could to help mobilize and comfort the survivors during the Fall. Carla, her soft and motherly aura, her gentle, kind eyes, her warm flowery scent. For a moment, I could imagine her encapsulating me within her pleasant and calming embrace.

Then suddenly, the web of paths split apart, and only one branch remained available to me. I almost fell over myself at the sudden vertigo as all the other paths suddenly went quiet.

A figment of light floated a few feet from my face, connected to a translucent flowy stream that surely led back to the paths. The light was shapeless, constantly morphing and changing as I grew mesmerized by its beauty.

A gentle warmth emanated from the phenomenon, and a flowery scent entered my nostrils. 'Carla…' I thought in wonder, basking in the comfort the orb provided.

Slowly, I reached out my hand to touch the manifestation of Carla's presence, childish wonder clouding my judgment. As my fingers made contact with it, a film passed over my eyes, taking me away from the infinite sandy landscape of the Paths.

There was a second in time of blended lights, sounds and smells, a twist in reality that felt nauseating and dizzying. But it ended as soon as it started, my vision began to unblur and my senses returned to full capacity.

As I came to, I found myself in front of a hospital bed. Frantic staff rushed all around me, the smell of blood and excrement pungent in the dank room. A noticeable pressure was present inside my head, but it was nothing of major regard.

Looking down at the bed, I saw Carla, awake and wrapped in countless bandages and with her leg in an elevated cast. At the other end of the bed, Grisha Jaeger himself kneeled while clutching the covers, sobbing.

The change of scenery startled me, and I whipped my head around as I expected someone to call me out for trespassing. To my surprise, no one around seemed to notice my presence at all. 'I'm.. spectating Carla?'

"Grisha.." Carla spoke quietly, her face softened as she gestured to the side of her bed. "Come here."

I blanked out for a moment, stunned to silence. I'd never heard nor spoken the Eldian language in my life, I had no idea about its alphabet and I couldn't speak it myself either. Yet just now, I was able to understand Carla's speech? Perhaps it had something to do with being tethered to Carla's perspective?

Grisha shakily obliged, stumbling to Carla's side- and passing through me- as he took her hands into his.

He visibly strained himself to choke out a few words, yet the poor man was unable to vocalize whatever it was he wanted to say. In the end, he resorted to simply resting his face against Carla's shoulder, clutching her hands.

The scene shook me. Was this really Grisha Jaeger? While I had no idea what meddling with the paths would do or in what way I'd 'connect' with others via them, I certainly wasn't expecting this. I'd meant to try communicating, even if one sidedly, with Grisha.

"Grisha," Carla breathed shakily, rubbing her thumbs on the back of Grisha's hands. "Grisha, where's Eren? Mikasa?"

For the first time since I stumbled upon this scene, Grisha responded to Carla albeit with a tired and broken voice, "He's fine… he and his friends are alive Carla… But y-you- Carla, I-I.." He was unable to finish his sentence, choking up into another series of hiccuping sobs.

Carla exhaled heavily out of relief, her lips trembling as she began to join her husband in his cries.

I simply stood there, dumbfounded. It felt so terribly awkward intruding on such a private moment, but I'd already come this far and I still needed some lead on how things would change from now on.

That said… could I just come back later? It seemed like the two would be like this for a while more. In fact, what were the boundaries of this spectral state? How far could I stay away from my 'tether', Carla, before being thrown back into the paths.

Was this the same method Zeke used to show Eren Grisha's memories? I'd never thought of it being used in this fashion, nor had I believed it possible.

The implications of being able to move around freely in space whilst being intangible was mind boggling.

That in mind, I began walking away from the hospital bed, flinching slightly everytime a panicked medic unknowingly ran straight through me. That was odd, humans passed through me yet the ground remained tangible enough to keep me up.

…could I interact with the physical world like this?

To experiment, I shuffled over to a medical tray that was shoved next to a bed. Tentatively, I gave it a push to see if I could move it.

My hands made contact with the metal, but there was no feeling other than solidness. The tray didn't budge, and neither did any of the surgical tools on top of it. 'Bummer.'

I turned away, deciding to embark on my previous question; how far could I be from my physical tether?

As I walked through the room, I immediately noticed my movements begin to grow heavy and slow. The pressure inside my head that had been increasing, ever so slowly, began to increase exponentially- causing me to wince as a legitimate migraine began to throb within my skull. The further I stepped away from Carla, the thicker the air became around me.

It seemed I was indeed limited by the awareness of whomever I chose to spectate. Though, surely there was a way to bypass this, right?

Another medic passed through me, at that moment I caught a faint whiff of his smell. I captured the image of his face, his fair skin and dark hair. What if I could swap tethers here?

I wasn't entirely sure, but I hypothesized that what connected me to Carla was my ability to vividly imagine her presence individually among the countless others within the brain link. Could I do the same here?

I looked around the corridor for someone stationary to 'switch' to. A nurse in a corner, vomiting into a bucket caught my eye.

I swiftly made my way to her, drinking in all the details of her face, body, scent and demeanor. She looked up from the bucket, red-faced and wiping her sleeve against her mouth. I felt bad for her. The poor girl was likely new to the job and had probably seen such terrible imagery today.

Reaching out, I hovered my hands on her shoulders, trying to reach deeper than just what I could see. I tried to read, memorize and understand the emotions and feelings radiating from this person, trying to capture the essence of what set them apart from others.

Suddenly, I felt a spark light in the back of my mind, and something clicked, as I now saw the orb of this girl's 'individuality' appear within her chest.

It glowed a sickly yellow, moving in an oddly nauseating fashion. Nervousness, disgust and fear emanated from it in waves, making me second guess myself. But, as I saw her beginning to get up and leave the room, I decided it was now or never.

I grabbed onto the orb of light. Immediately I felt an invisible string which bound me to Carla snap as I was suddenly tethered to the nurse.

My mouth gaped as I breathed heavily, the sensation of switching tethers similar to dousing myself under ice cold water. Yet, it worked. I no longer felt the resistance from moving far away from Carla. The pressure in my head remained though, still steadily increasing.

The young nurse had now begun to leave the room, carrying the bucket she vomited in. I hastily made my way out behind her, relief flooding me as the air outside the hospital wing was far cleaner and less putrid than within.

I followed her through the corridors of the hospital, realizing that this building had certainly not been a hospital until this day- it seemed more like a warehouse or storage unit that had been improvised into a hospital.

The reality behind the situation twisted my stomach and made me want to curl in on myself. This was the side of the Fall that the show didn't shed much light on.

The overpopulation of Wall Rose due to the refugees would be dealt with via a mass culling. What could I do about it?

I couldn't remember the exact number, but it was a few hundred thousand refugees that were sent out to 'reclaim' Wall Maria. How would I even go about protecting a fifth of them?

A noise brought me out of my thoughts, my attention turning in front where I saw the nurse had swung open two large metal doors, exposing a small balcony. She clutched the metal railing, beginning to hyperventilate.

I felt a pang in my heart as I watched the poor girl, barely an adult, break down in years against the railing. As useless as it was, I kneeled down to her level and wrapped my intangible arms around her.

As I made contact, I felt the onslaught of negative emotions rush into me. Fear, regret, trauma, this poor girl had been treating others since the beginning. Within the day she had watched countless others die under her hands, watched families grieve over their loved ones and was tasked with delivering the news to those waiting outside the emergency room.

The onslaught surprised me, but I kept my hold. Closing my eyes tightly, I thought of as much assurance as I possibly could. I didn't know if this transfer of emotion was mutual, but it was worth a try.

I pushed all other thoughts out of my mind and focused on envisioning relief, comfort and peace. After a few minutes of this, I began to think it was futile until I noticed the nurse's cries begin to die down.

As I looked at her, she wiped her face profusely in an effort to calm down. She seemed, and felt, considerably less panicked than before.

'Huh. So it worked.'

I took the moment of peace to look over the balcony myself to see Trost. Like Shiganshina, it was a maze of copper colored rooftops and beige buildings. Rain was pouring down heavily, blanketing the city within a depressing atmosphere.

It seemed to me that this wasn't really the time to check in on the aftermath of my actions. Everything was too raw, too fresh. It seemed that Grisha had not foreseen his wife's survival.

Did I manage to change the future? Has my interference with the timeline rendered the Attack Titan's ability null?

I'd ask Grisha himself personally soon enough. For now though, it seemed it was better to give him a few nights- hopefully he wouldn't decide to pass on the Attack and Founding titans so soon after reuniting with Carla. Plus, the migraine was now reaching levels of wanting to bash my head through a wall so I supposed it was time to return.

Giving the young nurse one last glance, I let go of my concentration over the invisible tether. I was violently ripped away from the physical world and thrown back into the realm of the paths, the vertigo great enough to send me off my feet. The absence of the brain link felt like an empty void in my head. Despite being on the ground, my arm remained outstretched, thrust out directly towards the pillar of light.

'That was… wow.'

The applications of this ability were basically endless. As long as I memorized an individual person's traits and demeanor fully, I'd be able to spectate them and their environment. Presumably, this was applicable with any and all Eldians.

This power… It was mine?

It was hard to believe. The power to access the paths freely was something no one else in this universe had, save the Founder. And with the Founder within Grisha's - soon Eren's - hands, I'd be the only one with this power until years into the future.

I had to tread carefully from here on, no more rash decisions. A plan was needed, to ensure the survival of Eldia without the need to genocide the foreign nations via The Rumbling. The beginnings of a course of action began to assemble within my mind, but once again I was stopped by one thing; a lack of information. What would Carla's survival change?

Truthfully, it may not have been as big a deal as I was making it out to be. What I should've been thinking of instead, was what to do upon waking up once more. I was sure to at least roll onto my back before passing out, but I still wasn't comfortable being completely defenseless out on an open field within viewing distance of the wall.

There was also the matter of survivors. There were bound to be those within Wall Maria who would not have escaped within the first twenty four hours, still waiting helplessly for military rescue that was never to come.

I'd already made my face known… As much as it could hurt me in the future, I could not abandon basic human morality and allow human life to be extinguished when I have the ability to make a difference.

I looked up towards the tangled mess of paths that loomed ever so menacing overhead. I set my brow, straightening my back in challenge.

Whatever setbacks that I'd made for myself during the Fall of Shiganshina would be overcome. There was no time to beat myself over things I couldn't change.

With that thought in mind, I began to force myself to regain consciousness of my physical body. It was not much different than waking from a dream, as I felt my existence within the paths begin to diminish and my senses return to me.

Reality struck me like a sledgehammer, as I threw my head upward to take a desperate heave of fresh hair. Dirt was flung yards away from my hair, which was now caked in drying mud and grass. I hacked and coughed up rainwater that had collected in my open maw throughout the night, some of it shooting out through my nose.

My lungs heaved out a shaky exhale as I rose up from my earthly bed. I spat out mud and grass, the taste of earth on my tongue. I tried wiping the dreariness from my eyes but only ended up smearing mud all over my face.

My entire body was covered in mud and wet with water, my hair slick with moisture and a small lake formed in the crater I'd made in my 'sleep'. I frowned, it seemed that I had not been spared the heavy downpour overnight.

I sat up completely, taking a moment to appreciate the dreamy colors painted all over the sky. The mountains and hills of Wall Maria framed the early dawn in almost divine fashion, a crown of warm light surrounding the bright dawn of the sun. A few sparse villages, farms and estates blended gracefully with the wooded landscape, making the scene look like some sort of fictional eden.

There was always a pleasant feeling in the air during the early morning. I'd make sure from now on to at least attempt to wake myself in time with the rising sun from now on.

The view as majestic as it was, was soured by the sight of multiple titans scattered about the land. Most were still prone or sat on the ground, still in their nightly hibernation state, while others moved around sluggishly and aimlessly. It scared me how quickly they spread to this end of Wall Maria.

At least none had come near me throughout the night. It was good to know that they carried no memory or grudges from the previous day. I shuddered as I thought of how vulnerable I let myself be for a full night. I'd need to find how to overcome my weakness as soon as possible.

Rising to my feet, I immediately began marching towards the water canal that connected Trost and Shiganshina. The muck that coated my entire body was extremely uncomfortable, especially in the way that it weighed down and clumped my already thick hair, so I desired a well deserved bath.

As I marched across the countryside, I spared a glance to the district of Trost on my left. It was far enough that I didn't have to worry about being shot by any cannons, as the walls from this distance were so small the trees around them appeared as insignificant as blades of grass.

Despite such, it still amazed me the stunning clarity of which I could see. Even from so far away, I could examine the texture of leaves and separate branches of the-almost-pinprick trees.

Taking my eyes off the walls, I looked back in front of me to see that I'd quickly arrived at the canal. I experimentally dipped my foot to test the temperature of the water, before realizing that no matter its temperature it was quickly warmed by my unnatural body heat.

And so, I placed my leg into the canal and was pleasantly surprised to see that the water was deeper than I'd expected. From the edge of the water, I could only touch the bottom if I fully extended my leg and toes.

Pleased with the depth, I slid into the canal, causing a swell of water to splash out from both sides as I jumped hip deep into the relieving basin.

I immediately fell to my knees, sighing in bliss as I began to work away at the dirt and filth stuck to my skin.

This would be my first proper bath since arriving in this world. It felt crazy to imagine that I'd become this dirty from only three days here, yet understandable considering I'd been living outside- in the wilderness, alone.

…I felt like a cave woman.

I sank my head into the water, raking out the accumulated mud and blood that had turned my hair into a disheveled mess. I thought of the countless animals or bugs that had found my scalp a good residence, and began to scrub harder.

Inside the water, I paid attention to my breasts which had begun to float. In my previous life my chest was considerably smaller, so the feeling was alien to me.

I'd always been told that having larger breasts meant more back pain and less mobility, so I'd been appreciative of my smaller chest as it meant they would not hinder any of my physical activities. Yet, thus far, I'd noticed no noticeable drawbacks.

They remained firm and compact despite their size to my relief, not getting in the way of my mobility, likely because of the developed musculature supporting them. That was the case for everything else on my body as well though.

In my previous life, I cared a fair bit for my appearance. I made an effort to remain hygienic, maintained proper skincare routines and kept my body in shape. I certainly wasn't at the level of the women in the perfume commercials, but I felt as if I was at least somewhat conventionally attractive.

This new form of mine however knocked everything out of the park. Perfect proportions from my chest, to my waist and hips. Long shapely legs, covered in rippling muscle to showcase their power. A stomach armored in perfectly symmetrical abdominal muscles, and arms that carried impressive -but not obscene- bulk. Smooth skin with no blemishes, even my face seemed to be considerably more attractive than it was before. It was still my face thankfully, but my cheekbones and jawline seemed more defined, my features sharper and more elegant. Not to mention my eyes, which glittered so beautifully that I could swear that they were glowing.

It was a form like something only possible in a 3d render, in fiction. In all respects, my body now was the body any fitness nut in my previous life would have dreamed of. A perfect physique, aesthetically and functionally.

Fixing my hair behind my head, I reclined against the riverbed in deep thought.

What good was it though? I could be the prettiest girl in the world, but I'd still be thirteen meters too tall to be anyone's lover, family, or even friend. The realization was rather… lonely.

It wasn't that I worried about impressing others with my body, no nothing like that, but it was the fact that for as long as I'd live here, I'd never find or feel any sort of meaningful connection with someone else.

I pondered on these depressing thoughts for a while more, before rising to my feet, water cascading off of my massive form like an ancient golem rising from its watery grave.

As relaxing as it was, sitting by myself in my natural bath, the sun would be coming up fully soon. That would mean titans would begin waking up, making my mission of rescuing as many survivors as possible much more difficult.

I climbed out of the basin, causing water to spill and splash from both sides of the canal. As I made it on land, I wrung out my hair and shook my body like a dog to rid myself of water.

Once somewhat dry, I began to carry myself into a jog, wondering where to look first. The expanse of Wall Maria was vast, and I had no idea how I'd be able to scour the whole thing- titan size or not.

It'd be a long few days for sure.

helo 👋

Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out, I've had basically 0 wifi through the entire summer - and couldnt find out how to upload this chapter on phone. Im back now though, and i'll try to upload more often! (as long as school doesnt kick my ass)

Not much happens in this chapter other than a delve into what the main character plans to do from here on- i wonder how Carla's survival will influence Grisha's decision?-, and a new ability related to the paths, mostly because I think my writing on mobile is too scuffed to write anything important or action packed, but heads up! Things begin to pick up next chapter, which I'll hopefully get out sooner than this one 🙏 no more slow chapters from here on I promise!

The last chapter got a lot of positive reviews which really surprised me, reading back on past chapters I realized my writing is littered with mistakes which I'm gonna have to fix in the future, but I'm really glad you guys like this story!

Hope everyone has been enjoyed their summer vacation, stay safe!