AN: Thank you so much for all the reviews, I'm so glad everyone is enjoying the story. I hope you like the new chapter. It's only two scenes but they are quite lengthy and I felt the scenes stand well enough on their own. It's a nice calm chapter, almost like the calm before the storm.
I mean what? No storm. There's no storm coming here. Nope, none at all. 0:D
Darkness surrounded her. Voices hovered nearby, faraway, and indistinct. Elsa strained to make out who was speaking. One voice sounded familiar, perhaps Markkus, but she couldn't tell who he was talking to or what they were saying.
She tried to sit up but was stopped by a band of pressure across her chest. An attempt to move her hands revealed that they too were pinned by something, lying heavy and immobile at her sides. Panic flooded Elsa's mind, sending her ears buzzing, her breath quickening. She couldn't move anything. She was trapped, pinned down by some unseen thing that was restricting her movements.
She struggled in vain to free herself when hot fingers pressed against either side of her head. The pressure of the fingertips against her head increased, then pain. An explosion of sharp, vicious pain in her skull, like someone was forcing a jagged knife through her temples, into her eyes. The pain took over her entire being. Elsa couldn't pull away, couldn't move at all, could hardly even breathe.
A hand pressed down on her arm and another gripped her shoulder, cold and insistent. A fresh voice reached her ears, but she couldn't tell what they were saying, what they wanted. The only thing she knew was they were holding her down. She tried to dislodge the hands but was helpless to do even that.
The voice called to her again, this time clearer, calling her name. Elsa snapped awake, her eyes blowing wide as she dug her left hand into the mattress and shoved herself upright, scooting back until she impacted the headboard. Her chest heaved as she tried to focus on her surroundings. The room felt too small, and far too hot. She couldn't think, couldn't breathe.
"Elsa!"
She turned toward the voice, but it took her a moment before her eyes focused and she recognized the frightened face of her younger sister. At the same time, pain crashed against her from all sides, from the sudden sharp movement upon waking. Elsa curled forward over her tented legs, blowing out sharp, shallow breaths.
A cool hand on her shoulder startled her and she flinched away from the contact.
"Elsa?" Anna's hand hovered in the empty air between them.
It was Anna who had touched her, who Elsa had recoiled away from. After all this time, all this work on their relationship, a wave a guilt washed over her as she stared into the hurt in her sister's eyes. Elsa wanted to apologize, to tell Anna it wasn't her fault, but she was having a hard time just thinking. Her heart was hammering against her chest like a battering ram and the feeling of being trapped, the panic that came with it, had dug its claws in too deeply.
"I'm getting, Malthe." Anna said, standing up from the bed.
Elsa reached out and grabbed her sister's sleeve between trembling fingers. Anna stilled, her eyes wide and full of fear. She looked toward the door and back to Elsa before finally returning to her perch on the bed, wrapping her fingers around Elsa's.
Elsa dropped her chin to her chest, her eyes slipping shut, and gave her sister's hand a weak squeeze. She gripped Anna's fingers as tightly as she could manage, relishing the feel of her sister's presence, using the contact to ground her.
They sat that way for a long time, Anna's thumb gently brushing back and forth across the back of Elsa's hand. It felt like forever before the flush of pain receded beneath the ever-present layer of cotton. Elsa's stomach still felt twisted into knots, and a sense of panic lingered at the edges of her thoughts, but she at least felt like she could breathe again.
As though she could sense it, Anna shifted closer. "Elsa?"
Elsa fought the urge to pull away, not wanting to hurt her sister, but she couldn't help but feel crowded, closed in, like the room was too small for them both. "I'm fine," she said, her voice breathy and weak.
"You're not. It looked like you were having a pretty awful nightmare." Anna chewed on her bottom lip, looking unsure. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Elsa looked at her sister, then dropped her gaze to her knees, a frown twisting her face. "I don't—"
"I understand," Anna quickly said, holding up a hand. "Really. If you don't want to, it's okay. But I'm here if you do."
Elsa shook her head. Sometimes she thought she really didn't deserve Anna as her sister. "It's not—I just don't remember. Only—voices, and feeling like something trapped me." Her brow scrunched as she tried to recall what had happened in the dream, what had brought about such feelings. "There was pain," she said finally. "A lot of pain." She shook her head and pressed the fingers of her splinted hand against her forehead, suddenly feeling exhausted and wanting to shove the thoughts away. "I don't remember anything else."
Through tired, blurry eyes she saw Anna reach toward her only to stop short and draw her hand back. Elsa felt a twinge of regret all over again. An awkwardness hung between them, like when they were first reunited after her storm, unsure of each other. She'd flinch at any contact, and Anna was scared to push her too hard or too fast. Elsa only hoped her sister would be as patient with her now as she had been then.
She felt dizzy and lightheaded and wanted to lie back down, but was afraid if she moved too much the pain would come screaming back. Her distress must have been written plainly on her face, because Anna quickly got up from the bed and started fussing with the covers. "Let's get you more comfortable."
Elsa nodded mutely.
"Do you want to sit up for a bit or lie back down?"
Heat rose in her cheeks. Elsa hated she needed help with a task as simple as sitting up or laying down. "I feel like such a mess." She hadn't meant to say such a thing out loud, but the words spilled past her lips before she could stop them.
"Well," Anna said carefully, "you kinda are."
Elsa's brows arched high, and she opened her mouth to retort but couldn't think of anything to say.
Anna winced and smiled apologetically. "Not like that. But, Elsa, you've been through a lot. You're allowed to be a bit of a mess right now. Believe me, no one is going to hold it against you."
Elsa wrinkled her nose. She wasn't supposed to be weak or show vulnerabilities. She was the Queen, and everyone looked to her for guidance. She was meant to be strong, to have all the answers, but right now, she couldn't feel further from that. She sighed, resigning to the fact she needed the help, at least for the moment. "Sit up for a bit," she finally answered. She really wanted to lay back down but knew such a transition would be more painful than just leaning back against pillows.
One step at a time.
"Okay." Anna moved to the head of the bed and got to work carefully arranging the pillows, then gently helped Elsa shift until she was laying back against the mountain of pillows.
Elsa squeezed her eyes shut tightly, doing her best not to wince at every slight movement, but it was hard. Her sides throbbed and the muscles across her abdomen pulled painfully. She held still, waiting for everything to settle back into a manageable level. Once it had, she opened her eyes and turned to find her sister watching her carefully. "Anna—"
"If you say your fine, I'm going to hide your favorite book when we get home."
Elsa snapped her mouth shut, those exact words dying on her lips. "Sorry," she said instead. "Habit, I guess."
Anna frowned deeply. A look crossed her face, too quick for Elsa's tired mind to properly pick up. She wondered what her sister was thinking, but before she could voice her question, Anna launched into a question of her own.
"How are you doing?" her sister asked. "Like, really doing? Is your stomach still bothering you?"
Elsa took her time answering, not wanting to worry her sister but knowing that hiding what she was feeling was only going to worry Anna more. "Off and on," she admitted quietly. "It's not too bad though, thanks to the painkillers."
"Anything else?"
"I just feel hot and shaky," she said honestly. "Otherwise, I feel okay. Nowhere near what I felt . . . last time." Elsa winced.
Anna reached toward her, once more hesitating, but placed her cool hand against Elsa's forehead. "You still feel pretty hot," she said. She tilted her head and brushed the sweaty bangs from Elsa's forehead before drawing her hand back into her lap. "You're sure there's nothing else?"
Elsa shook her head. She knew Anna was asking because she had a habit of hiding what she was feeling, but she had never seen the point in worrying someone when they there was nothing they could do. Honestly, she was surprised that the worst of her symptoms were currently rather mild, but she was eternally grateful for it. She wasn't sure she could handle what she felt last time with her current injuries. The restlessness and not being able to move would make her a very unpleasant person to be around, that she already knew. She held onto a fervent hope that things wouldn't get much worse than what she was already experiencing, but Malthe had said her symptoms would peak after about two weeks, so there was still time.
Elsa banished the thought, refusing to make herself anymore anxious than she already was. Besides, if her symptoms were going to worsen, then there wasn't much she could about it. She turned her attention back to her sister. "How are you holding up?"
"I'm okay," Anna said, but she shifted where she sat, a sure sign that she was under more stress than she wanted to admit. "Worried about you, about what Malthe said. Promise me if things start to get bad, you'll tell us. At least tell Malthe. I can't lose you and I don't want to see you suffer just because you think you have to be strong. Please?"
Elsa felt her heart twist painfully for her sister, and she wrapped her hand around Anna's. "I promise."
Anna fixed her with a hard stare and nodded. "Okay. Good." She squeezed Elsa's hand tightly and took a deep breath. "On another note, Rayna has been asking to see you. Captain Jogeir isn't really on board with the idea, but she's been helping Malthe out a lot and I told her I'd ask you. If you're feeling up to it."
Elsa would be lying if she said she hadn't wondered how Ray was doing, if the young girl was okay. They had invaded her home, the man that was supposed to be her leader gone, and her entire world turned inside out. She could only imagine how stressful it all must be for her. "I would love to see her."
Anna perked up. "Great. I'll let her know. If you are feeling up to it, maybe the three of us can have lunch together."
The look in her eyes was so hopeful, Elsa couldn't help the chuckle that bubbled up from her aching chest.
"That sounds perfect."
Settled in a plush chair at Elsa's bedside, Anna watched the steady rise and fall of her sister's chest. She felt restless, at a loss over what to do with herself, if there was anything she could do for Elsa. She wondered briefly if the nightmare she had witnessed was the first one her sister had since they arrived, but knew better. Elsa had been through so much in such a short time, it would be a miracle if she ever truly slept again. Despite her assurances that she was okay, it had taken quite a bit of time for Elsa to actually relax and Malthe's arriving with a fresh dose of pain medication before she would lay down again. She was, thankfully, quick to fall asleep, and Anna had remained by her side until she could be sure her sister was resting as peacefully as could be expected.
She rose from her seat and stretched her arms and stiff back, then paced the room. She had qualms about leaving Elsa alone, but felt confined in the small space, so Anna eventually she made her way into the hall, staying close but stretching her legs and getting fresh air, relatively speaking. She stopped by the kitchen to grab a quick bite of breakfast, then returned to continue her pacing.
At that moment, a report was being drawn up about the events that had transpired over the past few weeks. Once the document was finished Anna would read it to make sure everything was in order, it would be signed by herself, Admiral Naismith, Captain Jogeir, and Malthe. Then it would be handed over to the Captain of the Gambit, who would set sail back home and deliver it to the council.
Only after the Gambit had set sail would Anna give Elsa a copy of the report. Her older sister hated the thought of others putting themselves at risk for her sake, even if that risk was nominal. Anna wasn't sure what her sister's reaction was going to be to the report, especially now, when she could so easily see that Elsa was trying to appear unbothered by her uncertain future while bedbound and sleeping most of the day. Anna could see the fear in her sister's eyes, the worry, and, even worse, resignation to what she was convinced would happen once they returned home.
You can fool all of the people some of time; you can fool some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time.
The Gambit was slated to depart with the completed report later today, and the Snow Squall tomorrow. They would set sail the day after tomorrow. Finally, they would be going home.
Anna wrapped her arms around herself, pausing at a wide window that overlooked the sea. Kristoff was currently helping to get things packed for the trip home, and Alarik had been tied up assisting in locating the Vindarr council and working with them to select their representative, a task which should be completed as of that morning. That meant that until the report was done and ready for her review, Anna had nothing to do. At least, not until lunch.
She chewed her lip, gazing down the hall toward the room where the girl, Rayna, had been put up. Anna had mixed feelings about Rayna. Elsa had vouched for her, verified her story, and the fact that she trusted the young girl spoke volumes. Her sister wasn't one to trust easily, or at all. They had decided it early on that it would be beneficial to keep the girl close, just in case there was more to her than a slight, freckled girl with a wide friendly smile.
They had been right; it was beneficial, but not for the reasons that had originally been assumed. Rayna had proven herself to be far more knowledgeable about the apothecary and his medicines than anyone had expected, and of invaluable help to Malthe. Not only had she helped him to get the herbs he needed for Elsa, but also with the soldiers who had been wounded in the fighting, lending a hand in preparing them to sail back home on the Gambit.
It was a good sign that Elsa felt well enough to entertain someone other than herself or the doctor, but there was no denying the twinge of jealously Anna felt. Rayna had been here with her sister when Anna hadn't, when she hadn't even known what was going on with her. Rayna had cared for Elsa, had brought her meals and fresh clothing, and gained her trust. She wasn't ready to share her sister just yet. Anna made a fist, digging her fingernails into her palm and snapping herself out of it. Elsa had had someone by her side. That was what mattered.
Closer to lunch, Anna checked in on her sister, making sure Elsa was awake and still feeling up to a visit from the young girl, then made her way down the hall to collect her.
Outside Rayna's door, Anna drew in a deep breath, then nodded to the posted guard to open the door. She had only spoken with the girl once, a brief conversation just the day before. Alarik had told Anna that she was the spitting image of herself when she was younger, and even with Kristoff backing the claim, but she didn't really see the resemblance. Knowing what she now knew about Markkus, Anna couldn't help but wonder if he had chosen Rayna to look after her sister because of her looks. If he had used that vaguely familiar face to encourage Elsa to drop her guard.
When Anna had asked Rayna yesterday, why Markkus chose her for the task, the young girl had only shrugged and said she'd been in the right place at the right time with the right skill set. Anna doubted it was that simple, but it was clear Rayna didn't have any further information to offer on the matter. Whatever the reason for their meeting, they seemed to have developed a genuine bond throughout Elsa's time here.
As the door opened, Rayna looked up with wide eyes from the bed that she was sitting on, but remained silent as Anna entered the room, watching her curiously.
"Would you like to have lunch with Elsa and I?" Anna asked, sounding brisker than she'd intended.
Rayna didn't even seem to notice. Her eyes lit up, and she jumped off the bed before visibly reining herself in. "I can see her?"
Anna nodded, stepping back from the doorway to allow the girl to walk into the hall. The walk to Elsa's room was filled with awkward silence, but was blissfully short. Anna paused at the threshold long enough to ask the guard to have someone bring lunch for the three of them, then opened the door.
Like they had freed her from a cage, Rayna hurried into the room, rushing right up to Elsa's bedside. Elsa was sitting up, reclined against a stack of pillows. The girl quickly took in her sister's state, noting the dark bruising on Elsa's face and neck and the extensive bandaging that disappeared under her loose-fitting shirt.
"You look awful," she blurted.
Anna's mouth fell open, and she stepped forward, ready to interject, but her sister chuckled lightly.
"I'll have to take your word for it," Elsa said. "No one has let me see a mirror yet." Her voice was thick and still a bit hoarse, but full of humor. The smile slipped from her face as she peered at the girl. "Are you okay?"
Rayna shrugged, then slid gingerly onto the foot of the bed, taking care not to jostle the mattress. "I'm okay. It's weird having all these soldiers in the Keep, and I'm not allowed out of my room without an escort." She paused, picking at a loose thread on her shirt. "I guess I know how you felt now, though I'm not sure how you did it for almost an entire month. I'm going crazy even with something to do, and it's only been a few days."
"I had plenty of practice."
Anna frowned at her sister's comment as she moved to sit in the well-worn chair next to the bed. She watched the two interact, partly fascinated with the familiarity the girl treated her sister with.
"Anna told me you've been helping Malthe with the wounded and getting them ready to sail back home."
Rayna nodded. "It's not too hard. Sort of the same stuff I did for you and the other soldiers in training, though there are a lot more serious injuries. But I enjoy being able to help."
Elsa nodded, then rolled her lips into a thin line. There was a long moment of silence before she asked, "you know Markkus has disappeared?"
"I heard."
"Will you be able to stay in the Keep once we return home?"
Rayna chewed on her lower lip as she considered the question. "I'm not sure, I'm not a very good seamstress, and to be honest it's kind of a boring job. I spent more time taking care of the soldiers who were training with magic and then helping you. But now that all the spirits have been released, I don't think there will be much need for that."
Elsa's mouth lifted in a warm smile. "Why don't you come with us? Back to Arendelle? Our physician has some rather stubborn patients, and I'm sure he'd love to have an assistant."
The girl's eyes grew as large as dinner plates. "Really?"
"Really?" Anna echoed, leaning forward in her seat. Her sister's offer didn't surprise her as much as the suddenness of it did. Elsa had a big heart that ached to help as many people as she could, but she didn't act brashly, didn't make decisions without thinking them through carefully. So, either her sister had suddenly taken up the role of the impulsive one, or she had been thinking about this offer for the last couple days, saying nothing to anyone else, even Anna.
Elsa nodded. "Only if you want to, though."
Rayna quieted and stilled, gazing at the space between her and Elsa. "Would I live with you?" she asked, suddenly looking every bit like the young child she was.
"Of course," Elsa answered. "There are plenty of rooms in the castle. I'm sure Gerda can find you one that is more than suitable."
"And I'd be able to visit you?"
Elsa paused, a look flitting across her features. "Whenever you want," she said, smiling softly, but Anna could see it didn't quite reach her eyes.
It immediately reminded her of their previous conversation, of her sister's worry over her future on the throne. It was okay though; Anna would fix it. This time she would be the one to protect Elsa.
Rayna once more tugged at the loose string on her sleeve. "I think I'd like that. I always wanted to travel. Even if it's not really that far. And medicine is way more interesting that sewing."
"Good. It's settled then."
Anna couldn't help the smile that tugged at her lips. Captain Jogeir would be less than amused at the thought of not only bringing a Vindarr citizen back home with them, but setting her up in the castle to live with them. Rayna seemed friendly enough, and her enthusiasm was contagious. Anna was excited at the prospect of getting to know the girl that had so easily won over her guarded sister. The captain would be less enthused, but he also was in favor of Elsa never leaving the castle again. Anna wasn't entirely against that idea either, though she understood it was a fruitless hope.
The arrival of their lunch, a simple meal consisting of a creamy soup with mushrooms and meat, interrupted them. For Anna and Rayna, anyway. Anna smiled apologetically at Elsa as they gave her a small bowl of the same grey mush she'd been getting since she first woke.
Rayna leaned forward on the bed and looked into Elsa's bowl. She wrinkled her nose. "That stuff looks disgusting."
"That's because it is," Elsa returned.
"Why are you eating it?"
Elsa released a long sigh, shifting her spoon around the bowl without lifting it. "That's a good question. I assume it's some sort of revenge for all the grey hair I've caused the good doctor."
Rayna snorted, then dug into her meal. Anna followed suit, and they ate in companionable silence, though Elsa shifted her food around more than she actually ate. Anna refrained from commenting. At least for now. If that mushy offering tasted anything like it looked, then she couldn't blame her sister for simply picking at it. Her appetite was already poor, enough, so that there had been a shift from bringing meals to her at normal times of the day to just trying to get her to eat a few spoonfuls anytime she was awake, always encouraging her to eat a little more as they drew close to her next dose of pain meds. So far, it seemed to be working. Anna wasn't too worried; she knew Malthe was keeping a close eye on exactly how much Elsa was and was not eating each day.
Rayna swallowed a large bite of food, then broke the comfortable silence. "You know, some of the soldiers think you're a spirit of vengeance. But, like, in human form."
Elsa looked up from her barely touched meal. "I'm sorry, what?"
"The soldiers," Rayna said. "Well, Vindarr at least. The Sirma think you're a spirit as well, but less scary and vengeancy."
"Oh yeah," Anna said thoughtfully, tapping her spoon against her chin. "I forgot to tell you that."
Elsa looked between them. "I'm sorry, I'm confused. Why . . ."
"Because you freed the spirits trapped in the crystals," Rayna told her, digging her spoon into her meal.
Elsa blinked. "I did what?"
Anna frowned, resting her own spoon against the rim of her bowl. She hadn't gotten the chance to ask her sister before about what had happened during that final standoff with Tyr, nor confirm it was her sister who had shattered the crystals. But she knew it had been Elsa. Anna knew the ice that had covered the crystal only seconds before it shattered had belonged to her sister in the same way a person could recognize an artist from their painting.
"You shattered all the Vindarr's crystals?" Anna prompted. "The ones containing the Landvættir?"
Elsa shook her head. "I don't . . ." Her brow wrinkled tightly as she looked down at her lap, searching her memory.
"It would have happened after your fight with Tyr," Anna offered softly, trying to stoke her sister's strained mind.
"I . . . I remember the fight," Elsa said distantly. "I remember Rune was there, then Tyr . . ."
Anna could see the muscles along her sister's jaw jump. She recalled the horrible sight of the frozen statue of the man with a shiver. "Elsa?" She reached out, placing her hand on her sister's warm arm.
Elsa flinched, her gaze jumping up to meet Anna's before tearing away again. "The last thing I remember is Rune and feeling really tired . . . then nothing." She let out a slow breath. "If it was me, I don't remember doing it."
