Chapter 5

As much as Laguna wished for his family to remain perfect and happy forever, he knew it couldn't last. There would be times when things would go south, but he still held onto the hope that things would work out in the end.

Because of that, he always had the most optimistic attitude towards everything. He knew he had to continue being the best father he could for his kids, protecting and loving them at every moment.

So when Squall started to have nightmares more frequently, Laguna stayed with him throughout the night to comfort him. Laying by his son's side, he would rub his back, hoping it brought enough comfort to calm him down in sleep.

Eventually came a night when things seemed really bad, Squall was muttering nonsense in his sleep. Laguna sat down beside him as usual, placing a hand on his back, ready to comfort.

"Hey buddy, it's okay. You're safe here," he whispered.

Squall whimpered softly, clutching his sheets tightly. Whatever it was, it seemed to be quite a nightmare this time. But that was going to deter Laguna from helping. This was his son after all. He wasn't going to stop.

"Squall, I'm right here for you."

Suddenly Squall's eyes opened and sat up gasping, clutching the sheets ever tighter. He breathed in and out deeply, staring off at the wall before him. With another gentle hand on his back, Laguna leaned closer.

"It's okay. You're awake now. Everything's okay."

Squall didn't answer, instead he brought his knees up to rest his head on. He sighed, still not responding to his father yet. His breaths started to slow from his rapid pace from before.

"Squall, I'm right here."

Squall leaned forward, letting the hand brush away from him.

"Squall?"

"Don't wanna talk about it."

"But Squall, if it's bothering you, you should tell me."

"I don't wanna talk about it!" he hissed. "Leave me alone!"

Laguna shook his head. "No, I am not going to leave you alone, not when you need me."

Squall huffed and laid back down, turning onto his side. He faced away from Laguna and pulled the sheets over his head. "I said I don't want to talk about it."

With a sigh Laguna looked down at his son. He breathed out slowly before closing his eyes. "Okay bud. If you need your space, I'll let you have it. But don't forget you can come and talk to me anytime. Remember that okay?"

Squall hummed softly, but didn't bother looking. With a sigh, Laguna stood up and headed out of the room. He waited for a moment, looking back to see if Squall would call out for him, but there was still nothing. As much as he wanted to keep staying by his son, he knew pushing Squall too much wouldn't get any answers from him.

He would just wait until tomorrow to talk to Squall about it.

But when tomorrow came, Squall was oddly quiet, more so than he normally was. It almost felt like he was trying not to interact or even talk with Laguna. It hurt him a little to see his son so withdrawn. Whatever the nightmare was, it must have been bad to shake him so much.

At least Squall was talking to Ellone, but there was still that new distance between him and Laguna. It was what Laguna was having trouble racking his brain around. Why was it that Squall was acting this way? What could that nightmare have done that made him not want to talk to his own father?

That night, Laguna headed back into Squall's room. He found him sitting up on his bed, with his arms wrapped around his legs. He was staring down at the floor, not even noticing that his father had walked in.

"Squall? Ready to talk?"

"No."

"Come on, you can't let this sink you down."

"Weigh you down," Squall corrected.

"Whatever. Sink. Weigh. Same difference. Now, come on already, tell me what's bothering you," Laguna said as he sat down on the bed. "You know I am still here to listen."

"And what if I don't want to talk to you?"

Laguna looked a little surprised. "Squall! Don't use that type of tone with me. Whatever is bothering you, you gotta tell me, please? Just tell me what's wrong."

With an angry huff Squall looked up at his dad, glaring harshly even with the eyes of an eight-year-old. "I remember the last life!"

Laguna gasped, taken back slightly. "You… remember?"

"I remember the life before this! I remember my life before this one!"

"I… I thought," Laguna started to say, trying not to stammer over his words. "I didn't think you'd remember, well not until you were older."

Squall glared even harder. "You knew!? You knew about it and you didn't say anything?"

"Squall, I wasn't about to tell my little boy that we all lived past life that was filled with so much more pain, magic, and destruction. I didn't want to be the cause of you remembering or instead just confuse you," Laguna replied.

"Well I remember now! Now I remember what it was like before and how much I hated everything. You weren't there for me! You never were!" Squall screamed.

For a moment, Laguna was thankful that Ellone was away at a friend's house. The last thing he wanted was to worry her, or even worse have her remember as well. Seeing Squall struggling with his past life's memories was already hard enough. He had thought about it plenty of times, but he had never found a solution how he would ever talk to him about it.

Slowly Laguna tried to reach out towards his son. "Squall… you gotta know, that life is long in the past. A whole other life long said and done. We have each other now, isn't that what matters? I'm here for you this time."

"But I remember now! It's all fresh in my head. You weren't there for me. Ellone left and I forgot her. No one was ever there for me!" Squall's eyes were full of frustration and anger, but behind that there were tears.

"I know I wasn't there for you at that time. I regretted it every day since Ellone had told me about you. If you remember, I tried to connect with you when everything was done. I tried to make a difference," Laguna said as he tried to place a hand on Squall's shoulder.

Squall immediately knocked his hand away. "But I was alone! No one ever was there for me. You didn't try hard enough to look for Elle! If you found her, you could have found me!"

Laguna felt his heart ache slightly. Squall looked so tormented, no doubt struggling with now remembering a whole other life. "Squall-"

"No! Just leave me alone. I don't wanna see you right now!"

With another ache of his heart, Laguna decided to comply. He walked back towards the door, stopping when he was halfway through. "I know it's probably hard, Squall. Dealing with all those memories and emotions. I know how it feels. But you aren't alone this time. I made sure in this life to be here and care for you as much as I am able. I've given you the best of everything I could. Don't disregard everything in this life for the mistakes of the past life."

After that, Laguna left the room, hoping that by leaving Squall with those thoughts, he could come around in time. But all he could do was wait, and hope for the best.