You lucky people, you! It's 3:00, friday afternoon. I've just spent the
last fourty-five minutes going over the chapter, fixing all those
lovely problems my pre-reader found. And, since it's done before
nightfall, that means that the teaser isn't going to be used.
Yes, I was going to put up a teaser, instead of the next chapter,
considering neither my pre-reader nor I thought that it would be ready
for this week. But, halleluah! It's been finished. Aren't we a bunch of
happy readers? Happy readers that will send Li Xiang money, not for the
fic, but for Li Xiang's rather large anime addiction. So that those
fansubs awaiting Li Xiang's hands, can actually get there...
Sorry, I watched an episode and a half of Saiyuki, and now I want it.
In other news, I've done it again! For those of you who've known me for
awhile, know that I used to have a comic entitled "Oni". It didn't get
very far. This time, however, I _will_ update my new comic, "Legions".
Legions updates every monday with a new comic, at
http://www.geocities.com/airrydragon/ for those of you who want to
check it out.
Oh, and _Krypt_? Wrong Kunou. Think his dad.
False Identity
Chapter Thirteen: Nerima
Li Xiang
It was when they entered Reiji's limo-- Crawford and Ranma had been
"chosen" to be the "bodyguards" in the car with the two older men--
that it happened. Pauline had been quiet when Crawford was chosen,
although he was the one to suggest Ranma. Reiji had trusted his long
time friend's decision.
Ranma had expected it. How could he not? He'd spent two years in the
man's school, he knew the Kunou family was insane. Therefore, he caught
Pauline's wrist, and tapped a shiatsu point Doctor Tofuu had used on
him a few times in the past. The sheers fell to the floor of the limo.
Despite not knowing the boy's true motives for working with his
"bodyguards", Reiji had to smirk. The boy was good. He didn't even
flinch when Pauline lunged at him-- he'd seen trained military
officers, people who had been trained to be able to look down the
barrel of a fully loaded semi-automatic machine gun and smirk, flinch
when confronted by Pauline and his razor sharp sheers.
Their friendship had survived, mostly because Pauline had no desire to
take Reiji's job. Really, all he wanted from Reiji was money to fly to
Hawaii, and money to spend in Hawaii. Not to mention someone to
complain about Kodachi and Tatewaki to.
"My hair," came Ranma's sneer, "if off limits, Kunou. You should know
that by now."
The older man did something ever so mature. He stuck out his tongue.
Ranma blinked, not having to expected a full grown man to stick out his
tongue. While normally the ebon haired teenager would respond by
sticking out his tongue, it just seemed strange to see it from an
adult.
Even if it was a Kunou.
Crawford raised an eyebrow, and did not comment. Somehow, just somehow,
he couldn't understand _why_ Reiji would be friends with an inept moron
who acted like a child.
Pauline pulled his tongue in with a scowl in Ranma's direction, from
the lack of response, as well as the look he was getting from Crawford.
He had never personally met the man until that day, but Reiji had
spoken of Schwartz when he had first hired them. Crawford was just as
Reiji had described-- dignified and calculating. He may act like a
psychotic hair-obsessed idiot, but even he could see the cold gleam in
Crawford's eyes behind his glasses. At least in those rare moments of
ludicity; those happened almost once a year, now that he was taking his
medicines.
As he turned his gaze back to "his" student, Pauline felt a chill go
down his spine. Despite _looking_ normal, there was almost a feral
quality about him. Ranma's eyes glinted almost malevolently, even if
his face was blanked. Not even that infuriating smirk was on his face.
The moment passed, and Pauline lunged for the sheers, only to be
slammed into the left door of the limo. Ranma dropped his leg from the
kick. Again, the man snatched up his scissors, and charged at Ranma;
and considering that they were in a car at that moment, Ranma had
little room to maneuver. Another kick, with a punch thrown in, just for
fun, Pauline found himself making friends with the door, again.
Reiji scowled, "Don't fight in here."
Ranma's voice was monotone again, "Of course, Sir."
Pauline whimpered, crawling back into his seat, "But Reiji-kun..."[1]
"No," Reiji turned a piercing glare on his friend, and the Kunou
Patriarch wilted. He always had, ever since they were kids. Reiji could
be _Scary_ when he wanted to be. Pauline gave a puppy-like whine, then
settled into his seat with a pout. Already, ideas of how to relieve
Ranma of his pigtail raced around inside his head.
Ranma, Crawford and Reiji ignored Kunou's mad giggling, from long
practice-- Crawford form Farfello, Reiji from Pauline himself, and
Ranma from dealing with Kodachi.
The drive to Nerima and the Kunou mansion was boring, in Ranma's view.
After Reiji had forbidden Pauline and Ranma from fighting, they'd
settled into a staring contest, glowering at each other. Even when
Pauline was chatting with Reiji, he watched Ranma out of the corner of
his eye.
The limo, as well as the black car the rest of Schwartz was in, pulled
into the Kunou driveway, under the gaze of one Kunou Kodachi. The
gymnast sighed; it looked like her father was home. That thought
changed instantly, when some man she didn't know, came out of the car,
followed by her Ranma-sama.
"My love," Kodachi whispered to the window, "You have finally come for
me!"
Her state of bliss was abruptly shattered by a man she'd seen in
pictures-- Takatori Reiji-- and her father exited the limo. It came
back just as quickly, as she decided that Ranma must have endured her
father's madness to ask for her hand in marriage. She laughed.
"Ohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho!"
An involuntary shiver ran down Ranma's back, and his head snapped up at
the laugh, even as he tripped Pauline. The man-- and his sheers-- hit
the ground, "Oh great, the Psycho's home."
/The one who's broadcasting disgusting fantasies of you, Bishoujo?/
/That's the one/ "Jei-sama?" Ranma turned to his master, "Whatever
Kodachi says, don't believe it. She's out of her mind."
"Oh?" Schwartz and Ranma had fallen into step behind the two rich men.
Farfello's hand lay possessively on Ranma's shoulder.
"She's tried to force herself on me, before," the ebony haired boy
sounded vaguely disgusted, as they passed the threshold, and entered
the Kunou mansion.
Jei was just barely able to yank Ranma to him, as the larger form of
the principal of Furinkan high whirled, sheers in hand. The man skidded
to a stop, his target having moved, "Da big Kahuna refuses to 'llow
long-hair in his home. You be getting a hair-cut!"
Schuldich's hand went to his own, flame toned locks, and his eyes
narrowed into slits. Like hell he'd let this man touch his hair. Ranma
had similar thoughts as he shot forwards to relieve Pauline of the
sheers in his hand. The older man grinned madly, lunging at his "prey".
Farfello snarled as he watched, but he held back. If Ranma was really
serious, the Saotome Family honour blade would be out. Ranma was
playing a game of... "Cat and Mouse", with Pauline. Of course, someone
_else_ didn't see it that way.
"Ranma-sama!"
The ribbon cracked the air, and Kodachi pulled the sheers from her
father's hand. The Black Rose swept forwards, visions of her Ranma-sama
dropping to his knees before her beauty and proposing to her flooded
her mind.
Farfello's snarl turned into an outright bestial growl. Ranma heard the
growl, and turned his attention back to where, Farfello believed, it
belonged: on him.
"Jei-sama!" Kitty was by his master's side in a mere moment, "You
remember what I said, Jei-sama?"
"Jei...sama?!" Kodachi shrieked, dropping both ribbon and sheers--
Pauline lunged for them, and turned to face Schuldich. Kodachi grabbed
Ranma about the neck with a wail, "What is this about, Ranma-sama?!"
"Get off him," Farfello was growling again, single amber eye flashing
darkly. The Irishman forcefully pried the girl off _his_ property,
throwing her to the ground, and wrapping himself around Ranma. The boy
looked a mixture of confusion and relief. Confusion, due to not
understanding _exactly_ what was going on between Farfello and Kodachi,
and relief for having Kodachi knocked off of him.
"Are you done yet?" Nagi stood at the far end of the hall, "Reiji-sama
is getting annoyed Jiro."
Pauline blinked a few times. It had been a long time since anyone other
than Reiji had called him 'Jiro', considering that it was his birth
name. With a bit of a shrug, he dropped the sheers again. He kept
wondering where the sharp pain in his skull was coming from; they
always vanished once he let go of the sheers... and backed away from
Schuldich, "I guess you don't _have_ to get a hair cut, _right_ now..."
Schuldich smirked, and padded further into the mansion behind its
owner. Still standing in the front entrance, Jei _glared_ at Kodachi,
before leading his Kitty into the home with an almost gleeful grin.
Kodachi fumed where she sat, before bouncing to her feet. Whoever this
one-eyed peasant was, there was no _way_ she'd let _him_ steal _her_
Ranma-sama!
The thing was, Jei was thinking along those very same lines.
---
Ranma stood, much as he had over the past few hours, with a nervous
look on his face. Jei and Kodachi had been glaring at one another, or
staring at him, since they'd entered. Kodachi's craze, lusting gaze was
a familiar weight that Ranma could ignore easily. However, Farfello's
almost... predatory stare was new. Then again, Ranma had only been
around his Jei-sama for a few short days.
In addition, he was bored. Reiji and Pauline were drunk off their
asses; Nagi was using his power to make various sculptures dance in
circles; Schuldich was asleep; and Crawford had vanished somewhere a
good hour and a half earlier.
"If you're that bored," okay, so maybe Schuldich _wasn't_ asleep, "Do
that martial arts thing of yours."
Kodachi was nearly drooling at the though-- Ranma-sama, bare chested
and sweat drenched, working out in her home... The fantasy had begun to
twist into a seriously deranged sex fantasy when Schuldich intervened.
Any telepath in _Japan_ could have seen her fantasy; she was
broadcasting so strongly.
While he _love_ to test out some of the more... kinky situations, on a
certain nineteen-year-old brunette, others were too much, even for him.
The telepath ruthlessly gave her a glimpse of a full-blown migraine,
for a good minute and a half. Kodachi whimpered, and Schuldich dropped
out of her mind with a smirk.
She bounced to her feet, Ranma and Jei already moving out of the room.
A nasty little smirk crossed her features. She'd lead Ranma-sama to
their dojo-- he'd be grateful, banish the white-haired bodyguard, and
they'd make beautiful passionate love.
Giggling madly, the gymnast darted in front of her love, "Ranma-sama!
I'll show you to the dojo!"
Farfello growled, curling his fingers in the back of Ranma's shirt. The
younger man nodded, and the gymnast latched herself to Ranma's side.
Her hand came up, waving the Irishman off, "Begone, peasant!"
It was Ranma himself that grabbed her wrist, "You _ever_ call Jei-sama
a 'peasant' again, and I _won't_ hesitate to kill you. Is that
understood?"
"Ranma-sama..." Kodachi was divided on what to do. On one hand, this
peasant had obviously brainwashed her Ranma-sama into believing he was
less than the gaijin trash. On the other, her Ranma-sama had threatened
her. Her! His one true love!
She glared at the evil Jei again. He was at fault, as much as that
whore Tendou Akane, for keeping Ranma-sama away from her. The gaijin
looked down at her, his single eye radiating a sense of smugness, and
contempt, as they moved through the mansion, towards the training
room/dojo.
"Oh! Ranma-sama, Tatchi may be practicing inside..."
"Good," Ranma _purred_. Kodachi looked a bit surprised-- she'd never
heard Ranma _purr_ before-- and Jei was the picture of a hyperactive
six-year-old standing at the gates to Disney land. He was almost
_bouncing_ in place as Ranma continued, "I need to work off some
stress."
The door swung inwards when Kodachi touched it. Within stood Kunou
Tatewaki, in all his "glory". The bokoutou arced through the air, the
young kendo student running through his forms. The fading sunlight
spilled through the window, giving the room and almost daydream
quality.
"Abyssian's better."
One had to wonder if they practiced that. Ranma and Jei had spoken as
one, their voices ringing out through the training hall. Kunou froze.
He turned, slowly, to the door.
"Knave! How dare you enter these holy grounds, demon! Your mere
presence defiles my home, sorcerer! Begone!"
"Does he always talk like this, Kitty?"
Ranma snorted, "Sometimes, the moron is worse."
"You dare?!" Kunou roared, "You dare to speak ill of mineself? Have at
thee!" The kendoist lunged at Ranma, swinging the wooden blade,
screaming his "war cry"-- "RATATATATATATATATATATA!"
The martial artist dodged lazily, hands in his pockets. As Kunou
overextended, Ranma leaned back. His leg snapped up, cracking loudly
against Kunou's elbow. He screamed in pain, as the joint was forcibly
reversed, the bokoutou slipping from nerveless fingers.
"Asshole!!" Kodachi, Jei and Ranma blinked. With the way Kunou normally
talked, they hadn't expected this. Nor his next words, "You goddamned
_whore_!!! You broke my arm, you fuckin' LUNATIC!!"
Even more shocking was the fact that Kunou's eyes did not hold the
glaze of obsession that had been there so long, even _Pauline_ couldn't
remember a time when it wasn't there. Kunou had never had such a
serious injury, however, and apparently, it was enough pain, that it
loosed him from his insanity. At least, temporarily.
"Asshole," Kunou repeated, using his good arm to push himself to his
feet. His teeth were grit in pain, but a dark grin lit his lips,
"You're a fool," he sneered, "A fool bound to evil."
He stood tall, the glaze still gone from his eyes. In its place was
pain, but still a hell of arrogance, "You're a low-borne crass fool.
You'll never be anything more. Following your father like a dog on a
leash, unable to think for himself," a mad chuckle distorted by pain
worked itself from his lips, the veneer of insanity crawling across his
eyes again, "You are _nothing_ Saotome. You will _never_ be anything
more than nothing. A toy, made for his superiors-- such as I!"[2]
Kunou would have continued his rant, but he was interrupted-- he found
himself slammed through the wall, legs twitching. Jei stood where Kunou
had, panting and snarling. Ranma jumped forwards, catching Jei's
shoulder, just as Reiji and Pauline burst in to see what the ruckus was
about.
"...the hell?" that, was Reiji.
"Youse little punks! You put my Tatchi through the wall!! Get out!! OUT
OF MY HOUSE!" and that, would be Pauline. The Kunou Patriarch was a
little more than pissed off.
Mostly over the fact that he'd have to delay that next trip to Hawaii
to pay for the damages done to his house.
---
Ranma kicked a stray can into the air, scowling into the early night,
the sun having set only an hour and a half earlier, "_Now_ what do we
do?"
Jei shrugged, "We could hunt."
"No we can't," the martial artist grumbled, glaring at the ground,
"Damn near everyone in this district is a martial artist."
"Really?" Jei draped an arm over Kitty's shoulders, dragging the boy
close enough that he could play with the metal name tag at Ranma's
throat. His pet nodded, and Jei frowned, "If you can't hunt here...
what do you do?"
"I'm Xue Shi, Jei-sama. I usually went to Juuban and did a few
performances," the ebony haired boy made a face, "Akira threatened to
let all of Japan know about my curse if I ever tired to get out of it."
"So kill him."
Ranma snorted, "I've thought about it, before, but I like Akira. I
won't kill someone I like."
Once more, Farfello's creepy pout came forwards, "But those are the
deaths that hurt God the most!"
Ranma didn't really have an argument for that. All he knew was that he
didn't want to kill Akira. It might have something to do with the fact
that the man had made him rich. Akira had even stopped Nabiki--
indirectly, of course-- from marketing Ranma-onna's image, due to Ranko
"looking like a cheap knock-off of Xue Shi."
"I want to kill something," Farfello growled into Ranma's neck, "Rip
something into itty bitty bloody pieces. Make God's smile crack, and
his eyes pour. He'll never hurt me, if I hurt him first! To bath in the
blood of innocence, and listen to his heart shatter, and laugh, and
laugh, and laugh..."
Farfello had switched to English, speaking with a thick, Irish broque,
halfway through his ranting. The pale haired assassin nipped at his
pet's skin, then pulled back to stare into the night. Ranma had tensed
almost imperceptibly, before relaxing completely. He was ready for
anything.
Well, almost anything, except the purple and white cat that strode out
of the shadows in their direction. Despite his swiftly returning feline
instincts and thoughts, Ranma still wasn't quite rid of his
ailurophobia. He gave a wailing scream of terror, twisting out of
Farfello's grip, to cower behind him. His master would protect him, his
panicked mind whimpered, Jei-sama would keep the evil thing away.
Farfello looked at his Kitty in confusion, then looked back at the cat
who was terrifying his property, "...Can I kill it?"
The whimper from behind him was all the information he needed. His
knife slipped into his hand, a malicious smile crossing his face. The
cat stopped, and stared at the unknown man for several moments.
Farfello's grin broke, and he spoke, "Killing kittens hurts God."
He lunged at the cat, and it nimbly dodged out of his way. A low growl,
and a sadistic grin, was sent in the cat's direction. Cackling madly,
the Irishman lashed out with a sharp kick. The cat took the attack in
the ribs, flying back; it rolled when it hit the ground, bouncing to
it's feet, and hissing. Farfello started after it, but it ran off into
the night.
The pout returned, "No kill?"
"Z'it gone...?" the madman turned back to his pet, who was curling out
of the fetal position he'd assumed when Farfello went after the cat.
"Gone," Farfello agreed, "but not dead. I wanted to kill it!"
"Her," Ranma corrected, "That was Shampoo. She thinks she's my wife."
"What?" Jei had heard about Xian Phu when he'd first met up with Kitty,
again. He had, of course, assumed she was human.
"Jhusenkyou, Spring of drowned Cat," Ranma explained, "Normally, she's
human. With purple hair, and happens to have a great body."
Farfello growled angrily, pulling Ranma to him, "You're mine!"
From any of the Fiancée Front, such possessiveness would have had Ranma
freaking out, and desperately trying to get away without getting
killed. The fact that it was his Jei-sama, simply had him relaxing
against his master. He didn't even protest Farfello's talking as though
he was an object to possess.
"Of course."
---
"Great-grandmother! Great-grandmother!" Xian Phu darted from the
kitchen, naked as the day she was born. It didn't really matter-- there
was no one there to see her. Muu Tzu was off training to get rid of
Ranma, "once and for all", and since it was after dark, the Nekohanten
was closed.
"What is it, child?"
Xian Phu switched to mandarin, so that there would be no mistakes in
what she said, "Husband was with this man. I wanted to surprise him,
but I got splashed first," she shivered, just noticing that she was
naked. After a moment, she gathered herself, "I came out to greet him,
but he ducked behind the man."
"He didn't run?" Khu Lon interrupted.
Xian Phu shook her head, "He screamed, and even whimpered, but he
didn't run. The man... Goddess Above! Great-grandmother, he asked
Husband if he could _kill_ me, then he attacked me! He came at him with
a knife, but I dodged, and he _kicked_ me! If I hadn't gotten away,
there's no doubt. He would have killed me."
"This does not sound good. Son-in-law hasn't been the same since the
battle at Jusendou. We must watch him."
End
[1] Before anyone makes a comment, they've been friends forever,
remember?
[2] Temporarily Sane. See, he's already going back. If he'd stayed
sane, he wouldn't have said that, now would he? *smirk*
And yes, there is a purpose to the Amazon scene. Mwahahahahahaha...
last fourty-five minutes going over the chapter, fixing all those
lovely problems my pre-reader found. And, since it's done before
nightfall, that means that the teaser isn't going to be used.
Yes, I was going to put up a teaser, instead of the next chapter,
considering neither my pre-reader nor I thought that it would be ready
for this week. But, halleluah! It's been finished. Aren't we a bunch of
happy readers? Happy readers that will send Li Xiang money, not for the
fic, but for Li Xiang's rather large anime addiction. So that those
fansubs awaiting Li Xiang's hands, can actually get there...
Sorry, I watched an episode and a half of Saiyuki, and now I want it.
In other news, I've done it again! For those of you who've known me for
awhile, know that I used to have a comic entitled "Oni". It didn't get
very far. This time, however, I _will_ update my new comic, "Legions".
Legions updates every monday with a new comic, at
http://www.geocities.com/airrydragon/ for those of you who want to
check it out.
Oh, and _Krypt_? Wrong Kunou. Think his dad.
False Identity
Chapter Thirteen: Nerima
Li Xiang
It was when they entered Reiji's limo-- Crawford and Ranma had been
"chosen" to be the "bodyguards" in the car with the two older men--
that it happened. Pauline had been quiet when Crawford was chosen,
although he was the one to suggest Ranma. Reiji had trusted his long
time friend's decision.
Ranma had expected it. How could he not? He'd spent two years in the
man's school, he knew the Kunou family was insane. Therefore, he caught
Pauline's wrist, and tapped a shiatsu point Doctor Tofuu had used on
him a few times in the past. The sheers fell to the floor of the limo.
Despite not knowing the boy's true motives for working with his
"bodyguards", Reiji had to smirk. The boy was good. He didn't even
flinch when Pauline lunged at him-- he'd seen trained military
officers, people who had been trained to be able to look down the
barrel of a fully loaded semi-automatic machine gun and smirk, flinch
when confronted by Pauline and his razor sharp sheers.
Their friendship had survived, mostly because Pauline had no desire to
take Reiji's job. Really, all he wanted from Reiji was money to fly to
Hawaii, and money to spend in Hawaii. Not to mention someone to
complain about Kodachi and Tatewaki to.
"My hair," came Ranma's sneer, "if off limits, Kunou. You should know
that by now."
The older man did something ever so mature. He stuck out his tongue.
Ranma blinked, not having to expected a full grown man to stick out his
tongue. While normally the ebon haired teenager would respond by
sticking out his tongue, it just seemed strange to see it from an
adult.
Even if it was a Kunou.
Crawford raised an eyebrow, and did not comment. Somehow, just somehow,
he couldn't understand _why_ Reiji would be friends with an inept moron
who acted like a child.
Pauline pulled his tongue in with a scowl in Ranma's direction, from
the lack of response, as well as the look he was getting from Crawford.
He had never personally met the man until that day, but Reiji had
spoken of Schwartz when he had first hired them. Crawford was just as
Reiji had described-- dignified and calculating. He may act like a
psychotic hair-obsessed idiot, but even he could see the cold gleam in
Crawford's eyes behind his glasses. At least in those rare moments of
ludicity; those happened almost once a year, now that he was taking his
medicines.
As he turned his gaze back to "his" student, Pauline felt a chill go
down his spine. Despite _looking_ normal, there was almost a feral
quality about him. Ranma's eyes glinted almost malevolently, even if
his face was blanked. Not even that infuriating smirk was on his face.
The moment passed, and Pauline lunged for the sheers, only to be
slammed into the left door of the limo. Ranma dropped his leg from the
kick. Again, the man snatched up his scissors, and charged at Ranma;
and considering that they were in a car at that moment, Ranma had
little room to maneuver. Another kick, with a punch thrown in, just for
fun, Pauline found himself making friends with the door, again.
Reiji scowled, "Don't fight in here."
Ranma's voice was monotone again, "Of course, Sir."
Pauline whimpered, crawling back into his seat, "But Reiji-kun..."[1]
"No," Reiji turned a piercing glare on his friend, and the Kunou
Patriarch wilted. He always had, ever since they were kids. Reiji could
be _Scary_ when he wanted to be. Pauline gave a puppy-like whine, then
settled into his seat with a pout. Already, ideas of how to relieve
Ranma of his pigtail raced around inside his head.
Ranma, Crawford and Reiji ignored Kunou's mad giggling, from long
practice-- Crawford form Farfello, Reiji from Pauline himself, and
Ranma from dealing with Kodachi.
The drive to Nerima and the Kunou mansion was boring, in Ranma's view.
After Reiji had forbidden Pauline and Ranma from fighting, they'd
settled into a staring contest, glowering at each other. Even when
Pauline was chatting with Reiji, he watched Ranma out of the corner of
his eye.
The limo, as well as the black car the rest of Schwartz was in, pulled
into the Kunou driveway, under the gaze of one Kunou Kodachi. The
gymnast sighed; it looked like her father was home. That thought
changed instantly, when some man she didn't know, came out of the car,
followed by her Ranma-sama.
"My love," Kodachi whispered to the window, "You have finally come for
me!"
Her state of bliss was abruptly shattered by a man she'd seen in
pictures-- Takatori Reiji-- and her father exited the limo. It came
back just as quickly, as she decided that Ranma must have endured her
father's madness to ask for her hand in marriage. She laughed.
"Ohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho!"
An involuntary shiver ran down Ranma's back, and his head snapped up at
the laugh, even as he tripped Pauline. The man-- and his sheers-- hit
the ground, "Oh great, the Psycho's home."
/The one who's broadcasting disgusting fantasies of you, Bishoujo?/
/That's the one/ "Jei-sama?" Ranma turned to his master, "Whatever
Kodachi says, don't believe it. She's out of her mind."
"Oh?" Schwartz and Ranma had fallen into step behind the two rich men.
Farfello's hand lay possessively on Ranma's shoulder.
"She's tried to force herself on me, before," the ebony haired boy
sounded vaguely disgusted, as they passed the threshold, and entered
the Kunou mansion.
Jei was just barely able to yank Ranma to him, as the larger form of
the principal of Furinkan high whirled, sheers in hand. The man skidded
to a stop, his target having moved, "Da big Kahuna refuses to 'llow
long-hair in his home. You be getting a hair-cut!"
Schuldich's hand went to his own, flame toned locks, and his eyes
narrowed into slits. Like hell he'd let this man touch his hair. Ranma
had similar thoughts as he shot forwards to relieve Pauline of the
sheers in his hand. The older man grinned madly, lunging at his "prey".
Farfello snarled as he watched, but he held back. If Ranma was really
serious, the Saotome Family honour blade would be out. Ranma was
playing a game of... "Cat and Mouse", with Pauline. Of course, someone
_else_ didn't see it that way.
"Ranma-sama!"
The ribbon cracked the air, and Kodachi pulled the sheers from her
father's hand. The Black Rose swept forwards, visions of her Ranma-sama
dropping to his knees before her beauty and proposing to her flooded
her mind.
Farfello's snarl turned into an outright bestial growl. Ranma heard the
growl, and turned his attention back to where, Farfello believed, it
belonged: on him.
"Jei-sama!" Kitty was by his master's side in a mere moment, "You
remember what I said, Jei-sama?"
"Jei...sama?!" Kodachi shrieked, dropping both ribbon and sheers--
Pauline lunged for them, and turned to face Schuldich. Kodachi grabbed
Ranma about the neck with a wail, "What is this about, Ranma-sama?!"
"Get off him," Farfello was growling again, single amber eye flashing
darkly. The Irishman forcefully pried the girl off _his_ property,
throwing her to the ground, and wrapping himself around Ranma. The boy
looked a mixture of confusion and relief. Confusion, due to not
understanding _exactly_ what was going on between Farfello and Kodachi,
and relief for having Kodachi knocked off of him.
"Are you done yet?" Nagi stood at the far end of the hall, "Reiji-sama
is getting annoyed Jiro."
Pauline blinked a few times. It had been a long time since anyone other
than Reiji had called him 'Jiro', considering that it was his birth
name. With a bit of a shrug, he dropped the sheers again. He kept
wondering where the sharp pain in his skull was coming from; they
always vanished once he let go of the sheers... and backed away from
Schuldich, "I guess you don't _have_ to get a hair cut, _right_ now..."
Schuldich smirked, and padded further into the mansion behind its
owner. Still standing in the front entrance, Jei _glared_ at Kodachi,
before leading his Kitty into the home with an almost gleeful grin.
Kodachi fumed where she sat, before bouncing to her feet. Whoever this
one-eyed peasant was, there was no _way_ she'd let _him_ steal _her_
Ranma-sama!
The thing was, Jei was thinking along those very same lines.
---
Ranma stood, much as he had over the past few hours, with a nervous
look on his face. Jei and Kodachi had been glaring at one another, or
staring at him, since they'd entered. Kodachi's craze, lusting gaze was
a familiar weight that Ranma could ignore easily. However, Farfello's
almost... predatory stare was new. Then again, Ranma had only been
around his Jei-sama for a few short days.
In addition, he was bored. Reiji and Pauline were drunk off their
asses; Nagi was using his power to make various sculptures dance in
circles; Schuldich was asleep; and Crawford had vanished somewhere a
good hour and a half earlier.
"If you're that bored," okay, so maybe Schuldich _wasn't_ asleep, "Do
that martial arts thing of yours."
Kodachi was nearly drooling at the though-- Ranma-sama, bare chested
and sweat drenched, working out in her home... The fantasy had begun to
twist into a seriously deranged sex fantasy when Schuldich intervened.
Any telepath in _Japan_ could have seen her fantasy; she was
broadcasting so strongly.
While he _love_ to test out some of the more... kinky situations, on a
certain nineteen-year-old brunette, others were too much, even for him.
The telepath ruthlessly gave her a glimpse of a full-blown migraine,
for a good minute and a half. Kodachi whimpered, and Schuldich dropped
out of her mind with a smirk.
She bounced to her feet, Ranma and Jei already moving out of the room.
A nasty little smirk crossed her features. She'd lead Ranma-sama to
their dojo-- he'd be grateful, banish the white-haired bodyguard, and
they'd make beautiful passionate love.
Giggling madly, the gymnast darted in front of her love, "Ranma-sama!
I'll show you to the dojo!"
Farfello growled, curling his fingers in the back of Ranma's shirt. The
younger man nodded, and the gymnast latched herself to Ranma's side.
Her hand came up, waving the Irishman off, "Begone, peasant!"
It was Ranma himself that grabbed her wrist, "You _ever_ call Jei-sama
a 'peasant' again, and I _won't_ hesitate to kill you. Is that
understood?"
"Ranma-sama..." Kodachi was divided on what to do. On one hand, this
peasant had obviously brainwashed her Ranma-sama into believing he was
less than the gaijin trash. On the other, her Ranma-sama had threatened
her. Her! His one true love!
She glared at the evil Jei again. He was at fault, as much as that
whore Tendou Akane, for keeping Ranma-sama away from her. The gaijin
looked down at her, his single eye radiating a sense of smugness, and
contempt, as they moved through the mansion, towards the training
room/dojo.
"Oh! Ranma-sama, Tatchi may be practicing inside..."
"Good," Ranma _purred_. Kodachi looked a bit surprised-- she'd never
heard Ranma _purr_ before-- and Jei was the picture of a hyperactive
six-year-old standing at the gates to Disney land. He was almost
_bouncing_ in place as Ranma continued, "I need to work off some
stress."
The door swung inwards when Kodachi touched it. Within stood Kunou
Tatewaki, in all his "glory". The bokoutou arced through the air, the
young kendo student running through his forms. The fading sunlight
spilled through the window, giving the room and almost daydream
quality.
"Abyssian's better."
One had to wonder if they practiced that. Ranma and Jei had spoken as
one, their voices ringing out through the training hall. Kunou froze.
He turned, slowly, to the door.
"Knave! How dare you enter these holy grounds, demon! Your mere
presence defiles my home, sorcerer! Begone!"
"Does he always talk like this, Kitty?"
Ranma snorted, "Sometimes, the moron is worse."
"You dare?!" Kunou roared, "You dare to speak ill of mineself? Have at
thee!" The kendoist lunged at Ranma, swinging the wooden blade,
screaming his "war cry"-- "RATATATATATATATATATATA!"
The martial artist dodged lazily, hands in his pockets. As Kunou
overextended, Ranma leaned back. His leg snapped up, cracking loudly
against Kunou's elbow. He screamed in pain, as the joint was forcibly
reversed, the bokoutou slipping from nerveless fingers.
"Asshole!!" Kodachi, Jei and Ranma blinked. With the way Kunou normally
talked, they hadn't expected this. Nor his next words, "You goddamned
_whore_!!! You broke my arm, you fuckin' LUNATIC!!"
Even more shocking was the fact that Kunou's eyes did not hold the
glaze of obsession that had been there so long, even _Pauline_ couldn't
remember a time when it wasn't there. Kunou had never had such a
serious injury, however, and apparently, it was enough pain, that it
loosed him from his insanity. At least, temporarily.
"Asshole," Kunou repeated, using his good arm to push himself to his
feet. His teeth were grit in pain, but a dark grin lit his lips,
"You're a fool," he sneered, "A fool bound to evil."
He stood tall, the glaze still gone from his eyes. In its place was
pain, but still a hell of arrogance, "You're a low-borne crass fool.
You'll never be anything more. Following your father like a dog on a
leash, unable to think for himself," a mad chuckle distorted by pain
worked itself from his lips, the veneer of insanity crawling across his
eyes again, "You are _nothing_ Saotome. You will _never_ be anything
more than nothing. A toy, made for his superiors-- such as I!"[2]
Kunou would have continued his rant, but he was interrupted-- he found
himself slammed through the wall, legs twitching. Jei stood where Kunou
had, panting and snarling. Ranma jumped forwards, catching Jei's
shoulder, just as Reiji and Pauline burst in to see what the ruckus was
about.
"...the hell?" that, was Reiji.
"Youse little punks! You put my Tatchi through the wall!! Get out!! OUT
OF MY HOUSE!" and that, would be Pauline. The Kunou Patriarch was a
little more than pissed off.
Mostly over the fact that he'd have to delay that next trip to Hawaii
to pay for the damages done to his house.
---
Ranma kicked a stray can into the air, scowling into the early night,
the sun having set only an hour and a half earlier, "_Now_ what do we
do?"
Jei shrugged, "We could hunt."
"No we can't," the martial artist grumbled, glaring at the ground,
"Damn near everyone in this district is a martial artist."
"Really?" Jei draped an arm over Kitty's shoulders, dragging the boy
close enough that he could play with the metal name tag at Ranma's
throat. His pet nodded, and Jei frowned, "If you can't hunt here...
what do you do?"
"I'm Xue Shi, Jei-sama. I usually went to Juuban and did a few
performances," the ebony haired boy made a face, "Akira threatened to
let all of Japan know about my curse if I ever tired to get out of it."
"So kill him."
Ranma snorted, "I've thought about it, before, but I like Akira. I
won't kill someone I like."
Once more, Farfello's creepy pout came forwards, "But those are the
deaths that hurt God the most!"
Ranma didn't really have an argument for that. All he knew was that he
didn't want to kill Akira. It might have something to do with the fact
that the man had made him rich. Akira had even stopped Nabiki--
indirectly, of course-- from marketing Ranma-onna's image, due to Ranko
"looking like a cheap knock-off of Xue Shi."
"I want to kill something," Farfello growled into Ranma's neck, "Rip
something into itty bitty bloody pieces. Make God's smile crack, and
his eyes pour. He'll never hurt me, if I hurt him first! To bath in the
blood of innocence, and listen to his heart shatter, and laugh, and
laugh, and laugh..."
Farfello had switched to English, speaking with a thick, Irish broque,
halfway through his ranting. The pale haired assassin nipped at his
pet's skin, then pulled back to stare into the night. Ranma had tensed
almost imperceptibly, before relaxing completely. He was ready for
anything.
Well, almost anything, except the purple and white cat that strode out
of the shadows in their direction. Despite his swiftly returning feline
instincts and thoughts, Ranma still wasn't quite rid of his
ailurophobia. He gave a wailing scream of terror, twisting out of
Farfello's grip, to cower behind him. His master would protect him, his
panicked mind whimpered, Jei-sama would keep the evil thing away.
Farfello looked at his Kitty in confusion, then looked back at the cat
who was terrifying his property, "...Can I kill it?"
The whimper from behind him was all the information he needed. His
knife slipped into his hand, a malicious smile crossing his face. The
cat stopped, and stared at the unknown man for several moments.
Farfello's grin broke, and he spoke, "Killing kittens hurts God."
He lunged at the cat, and it nimbly dodged out of his way. A low growl,
and a sadistic grin, was sent in the cat's direction. Cackling madly,
the Irishman lashed out with a sharp kick. The cat took the attack in
the ribs, flying back; it rolled when it hit the ground, bouncing to
it's feet, and hissing. Farfello started after it, but it ran off into
the night.
The pout returned, "No kill?"
"Z'it gone...?" the madman turned back to his pet, who was curling out
of the fetal position he'd assumed when Farfello went after the cat.
"Gone," Farfello agreed, "but not dead. I wanted to kill it!"
"Her," Ranma corrected, "That was Shampoo. She thinks she's my wife."
"What?" Jei had heard about Xian Phu when he'd first met up with Kitty,
again. He had, of course, assumed she was human.
"Jhusenkyou, Spring of drowned Cat," Ranma explained, "Normally, she's
human. With purple hair, and happens to have a great body."
Farfello growled angrily, pulling Ranma to him, "You're mine!"
From any of the Fiancée Front, such possessiveness would have had Ranma
freaking out, and desperately trying to get away without getting
killed. The fact that it was his Jei-sama, simply had him relaxing
against his master. He didn't even protest Farfello's talking as though
he was an object to possess.
"Of course."
---
"Great-grandmother! Great-grandmother!" Xian Phu darted from the
kitchen, naked as the day she was born. It didn't really matter-- there
was no one there to see her. Muu Tzu was off training to get rid of
Ranma, "once and for all", and since it was after dark, the Nekohanten
was closed.
"What is it, child?"
Xian Phu switched to mandarin, so that there would be no mistakes in
what she said, "Husband was with this man. I wanted to surprise him,
but I got splashed first," she shivered, just noticing that she was
naked. After a moment, she gathered herself, "I came out to greet him,
but he ducked behind the man."
"He didn't run?" Khu Lon interrupted.
Xian Phu shook her head, "He screamed, and even whimpered, but he
didn't run. The man... Goddess Above! Great-grandmother, he asked
Husband if he could _kill_ me, then he attacked me! He came at him with
a knife, but I dodged, and he _kicked_ me! If I hadn't gotten away,
there's no doubt. He would have killed me."
"This does not sound good. Son-in-law hasn't been the same since the
battle at Jusendou. We must watch him."
End
[1] Before anyone makes a comment, they've been friends forever,
remember?
[2] Temporarily Sane. See, he's already going back. If he'd stayed
sane, he wouldn't have said that, now would he? *smirk*
And yes, there is a purpose to the Amazon scene. Mwahahahahahaha...