The Misadventures of the Yuy Family a.k.a. 'When are we going to Disneyland'?
by-Ahem, -shinigami-, and Hatake
Disclaimer: None of us own anything. So poo on you.
Genre: Humor/Stupidity/Parody of The Sopranos...sort of.
Warnings: Violence (kinda), swearing, dysfunctional families, and general silliness.
Dedication: Invader Zim (as always). And...um...anime. Yeah, that's a good one.
Last time on this pathetic excuse for an RPG-turned-fanfiction, there had been more arguments, but mostly utterances of the word 'doom'. Well, now the argument turns to the 5xR pairing and how Heero liked it and Ahem didn't...
Heero: Wufei can hug Relena all he wants. O_o;
Ahem: No, he can't.
Heero: Yes he can.
Ahem: No he can't.
Heero: Yes he can.
Ahem: No he can't! *is distracted by music* Gackt has a sexy voice...
Cryz: *nods* Sexy, sexy...
Heero: ...women...
Wufei: *nods*
Ahem: Ah, don't misunderstand, koi. Aishiteru. *kisses Wufei*
Heero: AHEM KONTON YUY!
Ahem: Oh, fudge off.
Heero: Don't speak to me that way.
Cryz: Oo;;
Wufei: *snickers* Ahem Konton Yuy...
Cryz: Soon-to-be-Chang.
Heero: Not if I have anything to say about it.
Cryz: It will be Chang. She's not a little girl, get over it.
Ahem: Hai!
Heero: Shut up.
Ahem: Well, I'm not.
Heero: I WILL NOT LET AHEM MARRY CHANG!
Ahem: Yes-huh!
Heero: No-huh!
Wufei: *watches Invader Zim and tries to stay out of the argument*
Heero: CHANG!
Wufei: *winces* Yes?
Ahem: Well, why CAN'T I marry Wufei, Dad?
Heero: Because I said so.
Ahem: That's not a reason!!
Heero: Chang, you may leave now.
Wufei: I would, Yuy, but the doors are locked. Remember?
Heero: *unlocks doors* Be my guest.
Wufei: *leaves*
Ahem: TAASAN!
Heero: *plugs ears* You sound like your mother.
Cryz: *winces*
Ahem: *deathglare* Give me a real reason I can't marry Fei-koi!
Heero: I told you NO Ahem. now go to your room young lady and read lemons or whatever you do up there.
Ahem: Lemon? ^.^ Okay! *hops upstairs*
Heero: Gra...
Ahem: YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE, DAD!
Heero: YOU! GO READ YOUR LEMONS!
Hatake (hey! she's awake!): *leans over banister* Shut up, we're trying to sleep!
Ahem: Asshole.
Heero: You can't speak to me like that, young lady.
Duo (he's awake, too): She just did.
Cryz: Oi vay *skitters into the kitchen* Duo...it would be wise to let them be.
Hatake: *hugs Duo* Hai, koi.
Ahem: I HATE YOU, TAASAN!
Heero: GO READ YOUR LEMONS, GIRL! *man, I wish my parents were really like that...*
Ahem: YOU SHUT UP!
Duo & Hatake: *join Cryz in kitchen*
Duo: *half asleep* She hates Tarzan?
Cryz: *pokes Duo* Wake up.
Ahem: SHINIGAMI! You're a lousy parent!
Duo: Huh?
Cryz: She wasn't talking to you.
Ahem: *starts firing a gun at Heero*
Cryz: *sniff* She's just like her father, isn't she?
Duo: *stares at fight* Um...yep.
Heero: *fires back at Ahem*
Wufei: *walks in* I'm back with chow mein if anyone cares to eat...koibito?! Yuy?! What the...
Ahem: *waves at Wufei* Hi, koi! *continues firing at Heero* I HATE YOU!
Wufei: *waves weakly and scurries into the kitchen*
Cryz: Hello, Wufei.
Wufei: *nods* Yuy's koi.
Hatake: *sips tea* They are going to rip the shit out of the house like that.
Duo: I still don't understand the bit about Tarzan...
Cryz: Taasan. It means 'father'.
Duo: Oh.
Cryz: Baka Duo. *whaps him upside the head*
Hatake: *whacks Duo*
Duo: Itai...
Heero: GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Ahem: MAKE ME!
Cryz: It could make a nice sitcom-like the Sopranos.
Hatake: Yes.
Wufei: Huh?
Cryz: The Sopranos. It's about the mafia and so on.
Wufei: Oh.
Heero: SHUT UP, GUYS IN THE KITCHEN! AHEM KONTON YUY, GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Ahem: Not until you give me one good, solid reason that I can't marry my koi!
Wufei: ...
Heero: YOU'RE TOO YOUNG, AHEM!
Ahem: WHAT ABOUT YOU AND CRYZ?!
Heero: ER...SHE'S DIFFERENT!
Wufei: And here we go with the kois again...
Ahem: AND WUFEI FIRST GOT MARRIED WHEN HE WAS FOURTEEN, SO THERE!
Heero: THAT'S HIS FAMILY'S CHOICE!
Wufei: How did she know about-
Hatake: Episode Zero.
Wufei: Ah.
Ahem: AND CRYZ ISN'T DIFFERENT! SHE'S YOUNGER THAN I AM!
Heero: SO?!
Ahem: AND LOOK AT HATAKE AND DUO! YOU ENCOURAGED THEM! *this is also from before the story started. It was Heero's idea for Hatake to screw Duo because Duo was whining about being sex-deprived.*
Heero: THAT'S MY BEST FRIEND AND YOU'RE CRAZY COUSIN!
Ahem: SHE'S YOUR NEICE!
Heero: YEAH WELL OKAY THEN, MY BEST FRIEND AND YOUR CRAZY COUSIN/MY NEICE.
Ahem: SO WHY CAN'T _I_ MARRY THE GUY I LOVE?!
Heero: BECAUSE YOUR FATHER IS HEERO YUY AND HEERO YUY SAYS NO.
Hatake: Hey, the shooting stopped.
Duo: Out of bullets.
Hatake: Oh.
Cryz: It's verbal now.
Ahem: I DON'T GIVE A RAT'S ASS IF YOU'RE THE KING OF CHINA!
Wufei: ...hey!
Heero: HA YOU JUST INSULTED HIM!
Ahem: Oops. Gomen nasai, koi. I HATE YOU, TAASAN!
Heero: I HATE YOU TOO!
Duo: *delerious from lack of sleep* Tarzan...
Ahem; FINE, THEN WE BOTH HATE EACH OTHER!
Heero: YOU'RE AS ANNOYING AS YOUR MOTHER
Ahem: THEN I'LL GO LIVE WITH MY MOTHER! *stomps out of the house*
Heero: FINE! GO LIVE WITH THAT QUEEN OF THE BITCHES!
Hatake: ...ne, Uncle Heero, what did you just do?
Duo: giggling* Tarzan: Queen of Bitches...
Cryz: Grr...baka. *hits Duo* er..Hatake, take your koibito into a room and er...make him normal..as in normal for duo
Hatake: K. C'mon, koi.
Duo: Okie. walks off, giggling* Heero is Tarzan, Queen of Bitches.
Cryz: *laughs*
Wufei: *snorts*
Heero: Er...
Wufei: It's quiet...
Heero: *stares at the open door* what the HELL did i just do?
Wufei: ...well, Yuy, you just drove your only daughter to live with her mother, who is probably going to change the girl-I mean woman-into a peace-bitch.
Heero: gee you make me feel a lot better Chang. Hatake, go get your doggone crazy cousin back in this house.
Hatake: You do it. I'm busy with Duo
Duo: *giggle* Burritos
Heero: arg..Cryz?
Duo: bacon...do it all for the bacon...
Cryz: I'm eating.
Heero: ...Chang?
Wufei: *pretends to sleep*
Heero: grr...fine. *Grabs his coat and runs out the door* goddamn it, its really hot why did i bring my coat damnit...
Ahem: *at bus stop*
Heero: AHEM KONTON YUY Stop right there!
Ahem: *gives him the finger* Go away
Heero: Okay. *goes back to the house*
Cryz: ...well?
Heero: She told me to go away.
Cryz: mission failed then
Wufei: *opens one eye* Now you've done it, onna.
Cryz: what do you mean?
Heero: Mission...failed...?
Cryz: you failed to bring her back Yuy
Heero: Mission failed=self-destruct *walks off to self-destruct*
Cryz: Oo;
Wufei: *closes eye* Told you so
Cryz: *kicks wufei* and YOURE going over there to make sure the self destruction fails too
Wufei: Why me? He'll live, y'know
Cryz: because youre a gundam pilot o yes, be the bridegroom in bandages and a cast. NO. you go over there
Duo: Hi, guys! I just had the WEIRDEST dream! Woah, there're holes in the walls!
Cryz: ...Duo go make sure Heero does not self destruct.
Duo: Okay. *walks off to do so*
Hatake: My koi is such a baka...
Cryz: Hey! That's my brother you're talking about!
Hatake: Yes, but it's true.
Cryz: ...yeah.
Duo: Hey, Heero! Put down the detonator. Do it sloooowwwwllllllyyyy. Oh screw that, just put the damn thing down!
Heero: Hn.
Cryz: LOL slooooowwwwwlllyy...how american can you get?
Wufei: americans...*shakes his head*
Duo: WAH! Don't point that gun at me! I'm only doing what they told me t-AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! *runs*
Cryz: NO! DUO BAKA! You wussy!
Wufei: *sighs* Okay, fine. I'll do it. *walks over* Yuy, put the detonator down.
Heero: No.
Wufei: *sighs again* I do NOT want to have to say this...
Cryz: *giggles* Say it, Wufei, say it!
Wufei: *groans* Yuy, put it down or I'll rape your daughter.
Heero: ...
Cryz: Oo;
Hatake: *laughing* ooooo...you're gonna GET IT!
Heero: *eye starts twitching* You-you-what?!
Cryz: I can't believe he really said that, ne, Hatake?
Hatake: yeah
Cryz: *covers eyes* I can't look...
-Ahem-
NEXT TIME!!! More chaos, amnesia, fighting, and more!
by-Ahem, -shinigami-, and Hatake
Disclaimer: None of us own anything. So poo on you.
Genre: Humor/Stupidity/Parody of The Sopranos...sort of.
Warnings: Violence (kinda), swearing, dysfunctional families, and general silliness.
Dedication: Invader Zim (as always). And...um...anime. Yeah, that's a good one.
Last time on this pathetic excuse for an RPG-turned-fanfiction, there had been more arguments, but mostly utterances of the word 'doom'. Well, now the argument turns to the 5xR pairing and how Heero liked it and Ahem didn't...
Heero: Wufei can hug Relena all he wants. O_o;
Ahem: No, he can't.
Heero: Yes he can.
Ahem: No he can't.
Heero: Yes he can.
Ahem: No he can't! *is distracted by music* Gackt has a sexy voice...
Cryz: *nods* Sexy, sexy...
Heero: ...women...
Wufei: *nods*
Ahem: Ah, don't misunderstand, koi. Aishiteru. *kisses Wufei*
Heero: AHEM KONTON YUY!
Ahem: Oh, fudge off.
Heero: Don't speak to me that way.
Cryz: Oo;;
Wufei: *snickers* Ahem Konton Yuy...
Cryz: Soon-to-be-Chang.
Heero: Not if I have anything to say about it.
Cryz: It will be Chang. She's not a little girl, get over it.
Ahem: Hai!
Heero: Shut up.
Ahem: Well, I'm not.
Heero: I WILL NOT LET AHEM MARRY CHANG!
Ahem: Yes-huh!
Heero: No-huh!
Wufei: *watches Invader Zim and tries to stay out of the argument*
Heero: CHANG!
Wufei: *winces* Yes?
Ahem: Well, why CAN'T I marry Wufei, Dad?
Heero: Because I said so.
Ahem: That's not a reason!!
Heero: Chang, you may leave now.
Wufei: I would, Yuy, but the doors are locked. Remember?
Heero: *unlocks doors* Be my guest.
Wufei: *leaves*
Ahem: TAASAN!
Heero: *plugs ears* You sound like your mother.
Cryz: *winces*
Ahem: *deathglare* Give me a real reason I can't marry Fei-koi!
Heero: I told you NO Ahem. now go to your room young lady and read lemons or whatever you do up there.
Ahem: Lemon? ^.^ Okay! *hops upstairs*
Heero: Gra...
Ahem: YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE, DAD!
Heero: YOU! GO READ YOUR LEMONS!
Hatake (hey! she's awake!): *leans over banister* Shut up, we're trying to sleep!
Ahem: Asshole.
Heero: You can't speak to me like that, young lady.
Duo (he's awake, too): She just did.
Cryz: Oi vay *skitters into the kitchen* Duo...it would be wise to let them be.
Hatake: *hugs Duo* Hai, koi.
Ahem: I HATE YOU, TAASAN!
Heero: GO READ YOUR LEMONS, GIRL! *man, I wish my parents were really like that...*
Ahem: YOU SHUT UP!
Duo & Hatake: *join Cryz in kitchen*
Duo: *half asleep* She hates Tarzan?
Cryz: *pokes Duo* Wake up.
Ahem: SHINIGAMI! You're a lousy parent!
Duo: Huh?
Cryz: She wasn't talking to you.
Ahem: *starts firing a gun at Heero*
Cryz: *sniff* She's just like her father, isn't she?
Duo: *stares at fight* Um...yep.
Heero: *fires back at Ahem*
Wufei: *walks in* I'm back with chow mein if anyone cares to eat...koibito?! Yuy?! What the...
Ahem: *waves at Wufei* Hi, koi! *continues firing at Heero* I HATE YOU!
Wufei: *waves weakly and scurries into the kitchen*
Cryz: Hello, Wufei.
Wufei: *nods* Yuy's koi.
Hatake: *sips tea* They are going to rip the shit out of the house like that.
Duo: I still don't understand the bit about Tarzan...
Cryz: Taasan. It means 'father'.
Duo: Oh.
Cryz: Baka Duo. *whaps him upside the head*
Hatake: *whacks Duo*
Duo: Itai...
Heero: GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Ahem: MAKE ME!
Cryz: It could make a nice sitcom-like the Sopranos.
Hatake: Yes.
Wufei: Huh?
Cryz: The Sopranos. It's about the mafia and so on.
Wufei: Oh.
Heero: SHUT UP, GUYS IN THE KITCHEN! AHEM KONTON YUY, GO TO YOUR ROOM!
Ahem: Not until you give me one good, solid reason that I can't marry my koi!
Wufei: ...
Heero: YOU'RE TOO YOUNG, AHEM!
Ahem: WHAT ABOUT YOU AND CRYZ?!
Heero: ER...SHE'S DIFFERENT!
Wufei: And here we go with the kois again...
Ahem: AND WUFEI FIRST GOT MARRIED WHEN HE WAS FOURTEEN, SO THERE!
Heero: THAT'S HIS FAMILY'S CHOICE!
Wufei: How did she know about-
Hatake: Episode Zero.
Wufei: Ah.
Ahem: AND CRYZ ISN'T DIFFERENT! SHE'S YOUNGER THAN I AM!
Heero: SO?!
Ahem: AND LOOK AT HATAKE AND DUO! YOU ENCOURAGED THEM! *this is also from before the story started. It was Heero's idea for Hatake to screw Duo because Duo was whining about being sex-deprived.*
Heero: THAT'S MY BEST FRIEND AND YOU'RE CRAZY COUSIN!
Ahem: SHE'S YOUR NEICE!
Heero: YEAH WELL OKAY THEN, MY BEST FRIEND AND YOUR CRAZY COUSIN/MY NEICE.
Ahem: SO WHY CAN'T _I_ MARRY THE GUY I LOVE?!
Heero: BECAUSE YOUR FATHER IS HEERO YUY AND HEERO YUY SAYS NO.
Hatake: Hey, the shooting stopped.
Duo: Out of bullets.
Hatake: Oh.
Cryz: It's verbal now.
Ahem: I DON'T GIVE A RAT'S ASS IF YOU'RE THE KING OF CHINA!
Wufei: ...hey!
Heero: HA YOU JUST INSULTED HIM!
Ahem: Oops. Gomen nasai, koi. I HATE YOU, TAASAN!
Heero: I HATE YOU TOO!
Duo: *delerious from lack of sleep* Tarzan...
Ahem; FINE, THEN WE BOTH HATE EACH OTHER!
Heero: YOU'RE AS ANNOYING AS YOUR MOTHER
Ahem: THEN I'LL GO LIVE WITH MY MOTHER! *stomps out of the house*
Heero: FINE! GO LIVE WITH THAT QUEEN OF THE BITCHES!
Hatake: ...ne, Uncle Heero, what did you just do?
Duo: giggling* Tarzan: Queen of Bitches...
Cryz: Grr...baka. *hits Duo* er..Hatake, take your koibito into a room and er...make him normal..as in normal for duo
Hatake: K. C'mon, koi.
Duo: Okie. walks off, giggling* Heero is Tarzan, Queen of Bitches.
Cryz: *laughs*
Wufei: *snorts*
Heero: Er...
Wufei: It's quiet...
Heero: *stares at the open door* what the HELL did i just do?
Wufei: ...well, Yuy, you just drove your only daughter to live with her mother, who is probably going to change the girl-I mean woman-into a peace-bitch.
Heero: gee you make me feel a lot better Chang. Hatake, go get your doggone crazy cousin back in this house.
Hatake: You do it. I'm busy with Duo
Duo: *giggle* Burritos
Heero: arg..Cryz?
Duo: bacon...do it all for the bacon...
Cryz: I'm eating.
Heero: ...Chang?
Wufei: *pretends to sleep*
Heero: grr...fine. *Grabs his coat and runs out the door* goddamn it, its really hot why did i bring my coat damnit...
Ahem: *at bus stop*
Heero: AHEM KONTON YUY Stop right there!
Ahem: *gives him the finger* Go away
Heero: Okay. *goes back to the house*
Cryz: ...well?
Heero: She told me to go away.
Cryz: mission failed then
Wufei: *opens one eye* Now you've done it, onna.
Cryz: what do you mean?
Heero: Mission...failed...?
Cryz: you failed to bring her back Yuy
Heero: Mission failed=self-destruct *walks off to self-destruct*
Cryz: Oo;
Wufei: *closes eye* Told you so
Cryz: *kicks wufei* and YOURE going over there to make sure the self destruction fails too
Wufei: Why me? He'll live, y'know
Cryz: because youre a gundam pilot o yes, be the bridegroom in bandages and a cast. NO. you go over there
Duo: Hi, guys! I just had the WEIRDEST dream! Woah, there're holes in the walls!
Cryz: ...Duo go make sure Heero does not self destruct.
Duo: Okay. *walks off to do so*
Hatake: My koi is such a baka...
Cryz: Hey! That's my brother you're talking about!
Hatake: Yes, but it's true.
Cryz: ...yeah.
Duo: Hey, Heero! Put down the detonator. Do it sloooowwwwllllllyyyy. Oh screw that, just put the damn thing down!
Heero: Hn.
Cryz: LOL slooooowwwwwlllyy...how american can you get?
Wufei: americans...*shakes his head*
Duo: WAH! Don't point that gun at me! I'm only doing what they told me t-AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! *runs*
Cryz: NO! DUO BAKA! You wussy!
Wufei: *sighs* Okay, fine. I'll do it. *walks over* Yuy, put the detonator down.
Heero: No.
Wufei: *sighs again* I do NOT want to have to say this...
Cryz: *giggles* Say it, Wufei, say it!
Wufei: *groans* Yuy, put it down or I'll rape your daughter.
Heero: ...
Cryz: Oo;
Hatake: *laughing* ooooo...you're gonna GET IT!
Heero: *eye starts twitching* You-you-what?!
Cryz: I can't believe he really said that, ne, Hatake?
Hatake: yeah
Cryz: *covers eyes* I can't look...
-Ahem-
NEXT TIME!!! More chaos, amnesia, fighting, and more!