"Well I must say, I love this new outfit." Said Kaylan, turning to look into the gold plated mirror.
"Yes, I knew you would." Replied a smug Yzma-Kitty sitting on a silk cushion.
"But aren't the feathers a bit much?"
"Oh, no no no darling." Replied Yzma. "The key to being the emperors advisor is... is... extravagance."
"But I don't really see how it gets the job done."
"Yeah, I know. You have to look the part though."
"Oh allright." Said Kaylan, pulling her hair into a ponytail."
"No no no, girl!" Yzma-Kitty yowled. "Leave your hair down! It will look much better that way."
"But it will get in the way." Replied Kaylan. "I don't think I can work in this."
"Who said anything about work? Miaow! The Advisors Job is to DELEGATE work, honey, not do it yourself."
"But... Kuzco gave me the work to do whish would probably mean..."
"That he wanted you to take care of it by getting it done, by you, or someone else."
"So what do it do then?"
"Call a worker, and sit by and look pretty."
"But..."
"But nothing. Now call."
"Uhh, okay." Kaylan finally folded. "Umm... You there, servant, come here."
Bowing and scraping, the servant hurried over. "Yes, your grace, what can I do for you, your grace."
"Do you know the accounts well?"
"I do, your grace. I learn the mathermatics from my father who was..."
"Then get them in order." Cut in Kaylan. "Uhh... please?"
"Yes, your grace. Right away, your grace." The servant hurriedly picked up the papers and took them over to a near-by desk to analyze.
"Oh... I feel so mean." Whispered Kaylan to Yzma-Kitty.
"Well don't. The accounts are getting done, aren't they?"
"Well yes, but I..."
"That's brilliant!" Said Yzma-Kitty. "Now let's see what I can do about your nails."
"Oh, Alright." Said Kaylan, following Uzma-Kitty as she trotted out of the room and down the hall.
"So what do you want done, anyway?" Called Yzma from around the corner.
"Uhh... Nothing?"
"Nonsense, dear. I think I have some polish that will do nicely. It's in my lab, shall it take you?"
"Ooookay." Said Kaylan. "But where's your lab?"
"Oh my goodness, someone doesn't know where my secret lab is? Well well well deary, here's the entrace."
"Where?"
"The face on the wall dear, you'll have to pull the lever for me. The height and lack of opposable fifth digits you know."
Kaylan pulled the lever and a hole opened up in the floor, so Yzma-Kitty dropped into the depths below, wailing as she fell. "Wrong leverrrrrrrrr..!"
Moments later a very wet, very annoyed looking Yzma-Kitty stalked in from the opposite side of the room, dragging a crocodile behind her. "They still haven't gotten rid of that lever?" She said, knocking the crocodile away.
"The other lever now deary." Said Yzma-Kitty and Kaylan pulled the right lever which started a rollercoaster ride that, by the end of it, was nauseating for Kaylan.
Slightly green, Kaylan asked Yzma-Kitty where the nail-polish was.
"Over there in that owl shaped basket." She replied. "I always keep spares in there."
Kaylan lifted Yzma-Kitty up the the basket where Yzma-Kitty picked out a glass cylinder of a shiny, pink liqui.
"See how it sparkles?" Said Yzma-Kitty. "It will look lovely on your nails but you'll have to open it for me. Opposable thumbs again."
Yzma-Kitty handed Kaylan the phial before jumping out of her arms. "Then give it back to me. I can paint it on for you."
"Oh... Okay..." Said Kaylan, but suddenly she had a sharp pain in the side of her head and a feeling of suspicion aroused in her. Quickly, she inspected the bottle. Yes! There was a picture of a human on it. "Yzma-Kitty... good Yzma-Kitty... HOWTHEHELLCOULDYOU?!?"
Yelled Kaylan, corking the phial and shoving it roughly back into the basket. She was cut short from her ranting by a familiar voice from the other side of the lab.
"Kaylan? Is that you in there?" Called Kuzco, strolling into view. "Oh, and look at that, you have Yzma with you as well and, well gew whiz golly, look at that you're standing next to a basket of potions."
Kaylan was speechless.
"I thought I could trust you Kaylan." Kuzco muttered, shaking his head. "But I guess you'll just have to spend a lifetime in the dungeons."
"But... Kuzco I can explain..." Kaylan spluttered. "Really, I can..."
"No need, no need. Really, what a shame. I did think I could trust you." Said Kuzco, still shaking his head. "And you're even dressed like Yzma."
"But Yzma-Kitty, she..."
"I saw the servant doing your work as well." Continued Kuzco.
"Dammit!" Kaylan yelled. "Let me explain, won't you!"
Kuzco was shocked by this sudden outburst. "Okay, just don't try to poison me."
"Right." Said Kaylan, her voice aflame with anger towards Yzma-Kitty. "Yzma-Kitty tricked me. She told me she would help me cope with the workload of Emperor's Advisor. She lied. She manipulated me, telling me I could delegate the work and spend my time looking... ugh, pretty. So she dressed me up like he used to look and then lure me down here with a story about nail-polish. When you stormed in I had just realized what she did, and I was going no further. I promise you."
"Ooookay, that does sound rational, and I do want to trust you." Said Kuzco, pausing. "One more chance then, eh?"
He turned to go but then added, "Oh, and Yzma-Kitty? I have this place monitored 24 hours now. Don't try it again." before leaving.
******
Kaylan gripped Yzma-Kitty by the tail and stormed to the palace kitchens, fuming. "Friggin hell, you lied to me Yzma-Kitty dammit! You lied! Kuzco will probably never trust me again and it's all your fault."
"So what are you going to do about it, harem girl?" Yzma-Kitty hissed, whipping around trying to scratch Kaylan. "What can a farmers daughter do?"
"This." Kaylan's voice had a menace in it that instilled fear even into the hear of Yzma-Kitty. She smilled at Yzma-Kitty, presenting her with a litre-jug of vinegar and a box of baking soda. "Warning, I get irrational and dangerously creative when I'm severely pissed."
Kaylan tied Yzma-Kitty's legs together with a piece of string and forced her mouth open. "Now swallow nicely, deary." She growled, shoving the baking soda down Yzma-Kitty's throat. "This should be very yummy."
Kaylan poured as much of the vinegar as she could down Yzma-Kitty's throat before tying her mouth shut as well. Yzma-Kitty's looked around frantically, but could not call for help as she felt the foam build up. It sure sas strong string. Kaylan took a few steps back so she wouldn't get too much foam on her nice dress... and Yzma-Kitty exploded, sending guts and foam everywhere.
"Sorry about the mess!" Kaylan called, skipping out of the kitchens and back to her job, which by all means she was now going to try and handle on her own.
"Yes, I knew you would." Replied a smug Yzma-Kitty sitting on a silk cushion.
"But aren't the feathers a bit much?"
"Oh, no no no darling." Replied Yzma. "The key to being the emperors advisor is... is... extravagance."
"But I don't really see how it gets the job done."
"Yeah, I know. You have to look the part though."
"Oh allright." Said Kaylan, pulling her hair into a ponytail."
"No no no, girl!" Yzma-Kitty yowled. "Leave your hair down! It will look much better that way."
"But it will get in the way." Replied Kaylan. "I don't think I can work in this."
"Who said anything about work? Miaow! The Advisors Job is to DELEGATE work, honey, not do it yourself."
"But... Kuzco gave me the work to do whish would probably mean..."
"That he wanted you to take care of it by getting it done, by you, or someone else."
"So what do it do then?"
"Call a worker, and sit by and look pretty."
"But..."
"But nothing. Now call."
"Uhh, okay." Kaylan finally folded. "Umm... You there, servant, come here."
Bowing and scraping, the servant hurried over. "Yes, your grace, what can I do for you, your grace."
"Do you know the accounts well?"
"I do, your grace. I learn the mathermatics from my father who was..."
"Then get them in order." Cut in Kaylan. "Uhh... please?"
"Yes, your grace. Right away, your grace." The servant hurriedly picked up the papers and took them over to a near-by desk to analyze.
"Oh... I feel so mean." Whispered Kaylan to Yzma-Kitty.
"Well don't. The accounts are getting done, aren't they?"
"Well yes, but I..."
"That's brilliant!" Said Yzma-Kitty. "Now let's see what I can do about your nails."
"Oh, Alright." Said Kaylan, following Uzma-Kitty as she trotted out of the room and down the hall.
"So what do you want done, anyway?" Called Yzma from around the corner.
"Uhh... Nothing?"
"Nonsense, dear. I think I have some polish that will do nicely. It's in my lab, shall it take you?"
"Ooookay." Said Kaylan. "But where's your lab?"
"Oh my goodness, someone doesn't know where my secret lab is? Well well well deary, here's the entrace."
"Where?"
"The face on the wall dear, you'll have to pull the lever for me. The height and lack of opposable fifth digits you know."
Kaylan pulled the lever and a hole opened up in the floor, so Yzma-Kitty dropped into the depths below, wailing as she fell. "Wrong leverrrrrrrrr..!"
Moments later a very wet, very annoyed looking Yzma-Kitty stalked in from the opposite side of the room, dragging a crocodile behind her. "They still haven't gotten rid of that lever?" She said, knocking the crocodile away.
"The other lever now deary." Said Yzma-Kitty and Kaylan pulled the right lever which started a rollercoaster ride that, by the end of it, was nauseating for Kaylan.
Slightly green, Kaylan asked Yzma-Kitty where the nail-polish was.
"Over there in that owl shaped basket." She replied. "I always keep spares in there."
Kaylan lifted Yzma-Kitty up the the basket where Yzma-Kitty picked out a glass cylinder of a shiny, pink liqui.
"See how it sparkles?" Said Yzma-Kitty. "It will look lovely on your nails but you'll have to open it for me. Opposable thumbs again."
Yzma-Kitty handed Kaylan the phial before jumping out of her arms. "Then give it back to me. I can paint it on for you."
"Oh... Okay..." Said Kaylan, but suddenly she had a sharp pain in the side of her head and a feeling of suspicion aroused in her. Quickly, she inspected the bottle. Yes! There was a picture of a human on it. "Yzma-Kitty... good Yzma-Kitty... HOWTHEHELLCOULDYOU?!?"
Yelled Kaylan, corking the phial and shoving it roughly back into the basket. She was cut short from her ranting by a familiar voice from the other side of the lab.
"Kaylan? Is that you in there?" Called Kuzco, strolling into view. "Oh, and look at that, you have Yzma with you as well and, well gew whiz golly, look at that you're standing next to a basket of potions."
Kaylan was speechless.
"I thought I could trust you Kaylan." Kuzco muttered, shaking his head. "But I guess you'll just have to spend a lifetime in the dungeons."
"But... Kuzco I can explain..." Kaylan spluttered. "Really, I can..."
"No need, no need. Really, what a shame. I did think I could trust you." Said Kuzco, still shaking his head. "And you're even dressed like Yzma."
"But Yzma-Kitty, she..."
"I saw the servant doing your work as well." Continued Kuzco.
"Dammit!" Kaylan yelled. "Let me explain, won't you!"
Kuzco was shocked by this sudden outburst. "Okay, just don't try to poison me."
"Right." Said Kaylan, her voice aflame with anger towards Yzma-Kitty. "Yzma-Kitty tricked me. She told me she would help me cope with the workload of Emperor's Advisor. She lied. She manipulated me, telling me I could delegate the work and spend my time looking... ugh, pretty. So she dressed me up like he used to look and then lure me down here with a story about nail-polish. When you stormed in I had just realized what she did, and I was going no further. I promise you."
"Ooookay, that does sound rational, and I do want to trust you." Said Kuzco, pausing. "One more chance then, eh?"
He turned to go but then added, "Oh, and Yzma-Kitty? I have this place monitored 24 hours now. Don't try it again." before leaving.
******
Kaylan gripped Yzma-Kitty by the tail and stormed to the palace kitchens, fuming. "Friggin hell, you lied to me Yzma-Kitty dammit! You lied! Kuzco will probably never trust me again and it's all your fault."
"So what are you going to do about it, harem girl?" Yzma-Kitty hissed, whipping around trying to scratch Kaylan. "What can a farmers daughter do?"
"This." Kaylan's voice had a menace in it that instilled fear even into the hear of Yzma-Kitty. She smilled at Yzma-Kitty, presenting her with a litre-jug of vinegar and a box of baking soda. "Warning, I get irrational and dangerously creative when I'm severely pissed."
Kaylan tied Yzma-Kitty's legs together with a piece of string and forced her mouth open. "Now swallow nicely, deary." She growled, shoving the baking soda down Yzma-Kitty's throat. "This should be very yummy."
Kaylan poured as much of the vinegar as she could down Yzma-Kitty's throat before tying her mouth shut as well. Yzma-Kitty's looked around frantically, but could not call for help as she felt the foam build up. It sure sas strong string. Kaylan took a few steps back so she wouldn't get too much foam on her nice dress... and Yzma-Kitty exploded, sending guts and foam everywhere.
"Sorry about the mess!" Kaylan called, skipping out of the kitchens and back to her job, which by all means she was now going to try and handle on her own.