Title: Volva a Scelus
Author: Katu Backwards
Author email: katubish@hotmail.com
Rating: R (ish)
Summary: When a new boy begins school at Hogwarts, everything goes splodey. Sex, Voldemort, arguments, secrets, heroism, blood, and fluffy kittens named Foofkins.
Disclaimer: Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, and so on, do not belong to me. As you might have guessed. Chaos Aberidge is mine, Jupiter is mine, so on and so forth. Use 'em if you want, just link me. By link me I mean give me the link.
The normal rule goes, if you want to know when I update, leave your e-mail in a review and tell me so. I can think of nothing to disprove this.
Constructive criticism welcome and encouraged.
Various mild ideas including but not limited to; humour style, beginning-of-chapter information, ending-of-chapter summary, and some random information (ie - Draco's middle name being Thomas, etc), borrowed from the oh-so-talented, charmingly bohemian, tragically impoverish writer Cassandra Claire.
And now we return you to your regularly scheduled fic.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Headnotes:
* Commonly known as a Grin. © Lacci De Vrij/Emma Matson
---------------------
It was a a dark morning in August, and Jupiter had just awoken. She'd had the dream again, the nightmare that had haunted her since she was tiny. Only now it had her vision from the Hall of Shadow in it. She sat up in bed, holding her sheets to her heaving chest, and slowly waited for the fear to subside and her heartbeat to slow. Her breathing returned to normal, and she tried to ignore the burning depression that set in. She thought of him again, and how she missed him.
Severus had been gone for two months now, spying again for Dumbledore. Jupiter was naturally concerned about him, and very upset that she didn't get to see him anymore. Occasionally she would see him, walking through the hallways, looking like a man who had hang-glided over hell. She would shout to him, and sometimes he would hear, sometimes he wouldn't. If he did hear, he'd send her a glance over his shoulder. It would be sorrowful and lonely, but it was something. She found herself scanning the hallways for him each and every day, hoping she would see him. She rarely did.
As she got dressed, she switched to more happy thoughts, such as the fact that classes start today, and how she still had filing to do. She looked over at the clock on her nightstand, its red numbers proclaimed that it was only 5am. It was probably best, she had a lot of work to do.
It was raining outside, and through the darkness, cold rain was spattering against her windows. She sighed longingly and walked to one of them, forgetting her obligations as she unlatched the window with a lazy finger and opened it. The cold, wet air rushed into her room, and Jupiter breathed it deeply. She loved the rain, and as the tiny droplets of water drenched her face and torso, she settled into a sort of warm, cozy depression.
Her black hair stuck to her cheeks doggedly as she stared out into the gloom, humming to herself.
"You'll catch your death of cold that way, my dear." came an amused voice from Jupiter's doorway. She smiled into the storm, not opening her eyes.
"Good morning, Draco," she said, "What brings you up here?"
Draco shrugged, though Jupiter couldn't see. "Felt like it. Didn't sleep last night."
Jupiter laughed a little. "I'd scold you if I cared."
"Yeah, just felt like coming up and saying hi. I was rather hoping I could wake you up in an annoying manner, though."
"Mhmm..." he could tell Jupiter was too focused on the falling rain.
"Hey, shut that window and pay attention to me," Draco said, coming up and putting a hand on Jupiter's shoulder. Draco hadn't come up to visit his friend just to be ignored.
She shut the window and turned around. "Yes, Draco?"
Jupiter was soaked, at least from her shoulders up. Her long black hair was matted to her face, and her white cotton nightdress clung to her in a way that Draco might have found sexy, had he not been totally impervious to Jupiter's charms. Not that she used them on him anyway.
"Just wanted to talk to you about something..." He said. He obviously, Juptier thought, had something on his mind. He was usually much more snotty than this.
"What's that?" She asked. She walked over to her dresser and pulled out a baggy white button-up dress shirt (probably expensive), and a long black skirt. She undressed, much to Draco's annoyance, and then donned her drier clothes.
"Geez, Jupiter, it's hard to be serious with you when you're naked," He said, petulantly.
"Don't see why not," Jupiter said, and sat crosslegged at the head of her bed. "And besides, I'm not naked now. Have a seat."
Draco sighed and sat on Jupiter's green comforter. It had silver lining. "Jupiter, I'm having problems. Seriously. My father, he's been on the rampage recently."
Jupiter nodded, and began wringing out her wet hair over the side of the bed. "How so?"
"Just...Trying to get me to join the Dark Side and whatnot."
Jupiter looked surprised, and sat up. "I thought you wanted that," she said, with little emotion in her voice.
"I used to think I did, I was all for it in my second year, but...I don't know...I've grown since then. I think I've grown past it." Jupiter's face didn't move. Draco couldn't tell what she was thinking, but he wasn't worried about it. He continued speaking, blindly. "I really don't know how to deal with it. Lately, well, you see...I've made friends with a few people I know my father won't approve of, and-"
"Sod your father, Draco." Jupiter said simply. Draco goggled, he had expected her to have some words of comfort, or at least some good advice. Of course, that could have been her good advice...Either case, Draco didn't feel like pursuing it.
"There's another thing..." he said quietly. Jupiter cocked her head to one side inquisitively. "You remember Champagne?"
"Champagne..." Jupiter echoed, "The Wronski girl?"
"The same."
"Yes, I remember her. Long blonde hair, blue eyes, entirely too skinny."
Draco smiled a little. "Yeah."
"What about her?"
"Well, she's been owling me." Draco began rubbing his satin pajamas nervously.
"She couldn't be! Not owling you! The nerve!"
"Well, you haven't read what she's been writing to me..." Draco said quietly. Jupiter's mock look of horror suddenly morphed into a wide, perverted grin.
"Tell me, Draco. Tell me what she wrote you."
Draco shook his head. "I couldn't have said that to you, even when we were dating."
Jupiter's eyebrows shot up and she paused in the braiding of her long hair for a moment, her mouth curled into a highly amused smile. "Well then, thinking of asking her out?"
Draco shook his head. "See, that's the thing. I don't know if I want to, yet. I'm not really sure how to react to these letters."
Jupiter looked sincere. "I would honestly suggest," and the side of her mouth twitched, "That you write back."
Draco laughed. "Why did I think you would help me?"
"Because you're such a trusting soul, Draco," Jupiter said, and the both of them laughed.
"So, why are you up so early?" Draco asked, and Jupiter's smile faded only slightly.
"Had a nightmare. The usual, Voldemort and Severus. And I have work to do. I have a lot of student profiles I was supposed to submit a week ago. Dumbledore's pretty lenient, but I need them in his office in four hours."
Draco still couldn't understand how Jupiter got to be so forward in all her classes, got to be a Prefect, and Head of Student Relations, with her lazy attitude and sarcastic tongue. He sighed. "Want some help?"
"Oughtn't you go to bed, young man?" Jupiter smiled mockingly.
"Why bother?"
"Sure, have a seat." Jupiter finished braiding her hair and tied it off with a pastel blue ribbon. She lifted her wand off her nightstand and aimed it at a trunk at the opposite side of the room. "Wingardium Leviosa!" The trunk lifted effortlessly, and flew up to Jupiter's bed, landing lightly beside it. She prodded a place on the side of it, and it popped open. Inside were piles and piles of papers, neatly organised and rather intimidating.
"You're a bloody nutter, Jupiter."
"Yep. I love this job."
They began filing throug applicants, marking down allergies and schedules on separate sheets of papers, and laughing at irregularities in the students, not an uncommon occurence at Hogwarts.
Jupiter chuckled, "Look at this one! It's a pirate!" There was a picture of a boy with grey-white hair, and an eye patch. "Height, 6'6"? Holy Bludger! It's a monster pirate! And his name is Chaos? Oh, no, his name is Jason. Likes to be called Chaos. Captain Chaos!"
"Let me see," Draco said, and took the paper from her. "He's 18, and a pure blood. Only he's an orphan, now, if that term applies to 18 year olds. Lives with aunt in London...boring boring boring...la la la..." Draco continued to mumble as he looked it over. "Sounds like a real head case."
"Well, they do mention that his previous school was a mental institution."
They marked his information down and continued filing through papers until eight. Jupiter pressed a small button by her window, and soon, Fawkes came swooping down. They'd worked that out last year, as Fawkes was more able to carry all the packets of information up than a normal owl. When the phoenix flew out the window, Jupiter turned to Draco.
"Escort me to breakfast?" she asked, smiling. Draco nodded, and Jupiter grabbed her school robes, donned them, and the two walked down to The Great Hall, arm in arm.
***
When she and Draco arrived at the Slytherin table, which was on the far end of the Great Hall, Jupiter pointed at a familiar silver-blond head. "Look, it's him, it's Chaos."
"Well then," said Draco, "You'd better go talk to him. I have to attend to Pansy."
Draco wandered over to Pansy, who began to fawn all over him the moment he sat down. Jupiter laughed internally, some girls were so weird. She sat down by the new boy and looked at him.
"Good morning, Chaos," she said, and smiled at him. She delighted in knowing everyone's name before having met them. But the boy's pale face was devoid of any of the usual shock. Instead, spread across it was the most crooked, disturbing smile* Jupiter had ever seen. It was her turn to be nonplussed. She let her disconcertion show for only a second before replacing it with an automatic, and totally plastic, smile.
"Good morning, Lady," he said, and his voice was...indescribable. But the effort will be made. It was not deep, nor was it high. It was a little raspy, yet had a tendency to slide over words. Imagine taking a smooth piece of glass, covering it in honey, and rubbing it against a piece of coarse sandpaper, and that is almost how his voice sounded. Jupiter hadn't, in her entire life, heard a voice like it.
Jupiter didn't know what else to say, this boy wasn't reacting the way normal students would. It was awfully disconcerting. His profile information came rushing back to her. What was he institutionalized for? Criminal insanity? Borderline personality disorder? Kleptomania? Whatever the charges, Jupiter suddenly decided she no longer wanted to be next to the boy.
She looked away and skewered a bit of toast with her fork. She became aware of a distinct sniffing noise. She turned back to Chaos, he was smelling her! She gave him an askance look and turned back to her toast, putting some fried tomato and melted cheese on the top. She was doing her best to ignore the boy.
"You smell of mint, Lady," he said quietly, and Jupiter looked back at him. She nodded. He Grinned again at her and then turned away, back to his food. Jupiter shook her head, this boy was nuts. She stood and wandered away from the table, suddenly ceasing to be hungry. It was too important to put distance between her and the boy.
***
Later, Jupiter discovered that she had a few classes with the new boy, one of which was Potions, which was second period. She walked into the room, and looked at the walls. Her stomach gave a sick lurch of longing as her eyes scanned the walls of jars and the empty desk. She wondered who would be teaching. She moved to her usual seat, next to Deviancy Muggle. Deviancy was a tall, scrawny, and intelligent Slytherin girl with an unfortunate last name.
Moments later, Chaos walked in and saw Jupiter. He gave her the disgruntling smile again and sat in the seat directly behind her. Deviancy leaned over and said, "What a strange looking boy, is he new?"
Jupiter nodded. "He gives me the creeps. He SMELLED me earlier!"
"It's hard not to. You wear a lot of perfume."
"It's not perfume," Jupiter began defensively, "it's an oil, a lotion. And I don't wear lots of it. It's just very strong. I'm not even wearing any today!"
"Suit yourself. It smells like you're wearing it."
"Any case, I meant he leaned over and sniffed me. It was weird."
"Well," Deviancy said, "We Slytherins aren't always know for our sanity. After all-"
Jupiter had stopped paying attention. She wondered who'd be filling in for Severus today, since he was off spying. She bent down to look through her bag for her schedule, so she could check and see if it said. The classroom door opened and shut, and Jupiter was just pulling her schedule out of a side pocket when she heard a strict clearing of the throat. She snapped up in her seat and looked straight ahead, hardly daring to believe what her eyes told her. It was Snape! She resisted the urge to squeal in delight and instead, sat raptly at attention. He looked gaunt and tired, more so than usual, but no one else seemed to notice, much less care.
"Welcome to Potions class," he said, though he didn't sound at all welcoming, "I would like to say that it will be a competant year, but I doubt it. All I can honestly hope for is that some of you will leave this class marginally more intelligent than you were previously," he said in a low monotone, his eyes flicking distastefully over the Gryffindor side of the classroom. Jupiter noticed that Draco (who had been upped to the next level of Potions, and subsequently put in Jupiter's class), wasn't there.
Jupiter turned her thoughts back to Severus, who was checking that everyone had their textbooks. A Gryffindor, typically, didn't have his, and lost Gryffindor five points. The Gryffindors groaned and lost another two for complaining about a fair punishment. Most of the Slytherins sniggered smugly, which Snape ignored. Things seemed to be normal.
Snape gave them a written assignment about potion ingredients, and things pretty much progressed as usual, except that Jupiter had a lot more questions than were really warranted. She knew all the answers, but why should she pass up a great opportunity? It was a perfect excuse to have Severus hovering over her, and pointing out various principles and rules of potion-making, all of which she'd known since her first year. She could smell him, she could feel his body heat against her back as he leaned over her.
Severus seemed to note her sudden stupidity, too, because when she raised her hand for the umpteenth time he said, with a touch of cruel amusement, "Since, Miss Vrij, you seem to have left your brains in your common room, why don't you see me after class."
It was not a question, and it was not phrased nicely. The Gryffindors gasped at Snape making a mean comment to one of his precious Slytherins, but Jupiter was ecstatic.
Jupiter failed to pay attention all through the rest of the class, which Snape turned a blind eye to. When class was finally over, Jupiter waved good-bye to a few of her friends, who winked devilishly at her, and she laughed. Then the classroom was empty, except for the two. Snape shut the door and walked over to where Jupiter was standing. He didn't speak, or do anything except stare at Jupiter. Jupiter looked at the floor and broke the silence.
"I-I've missed you a lot, Severus," Jupiter said. Snape said nothing, so Jupiter spoke to fill the space, "It's been hard without you not owling all summer. I've kept asking Dumbledore about you, and even he's not always sure if you're all right. It's been hell without you! How have things been with you? Is everything well? Voldemort hasn't tried to hurt you, has he?" There was a long silence, and Severus's head was hanging tiredly. "...Severus? Severus, are you all right?"
Snape lifted his head with some difficulty. "For Christ's sake, no, Jupiter! I've spent the last two months running around, doing errands for the Dark Lord! Just being in his presence takes everything out of me. He suspects me of being unfaithful, and being around even the dumber Death Eaters reduces me to a nervous, paranoid wreck. I don't know how long I can keep doing this. Now shut up and just let me have a moment of peace with you. Please," he added harshly, his black eyes losing a bit of their anger.
Jupiter nodded apologetically and Severus wrapped her up in his arms. She hugged him back, and they stood that way for what seemed an hour, before Severus pulled away, breathing heavily. Jupiter suspected it wasn't being in such close proximity to him that was causing his breath to come quickly.
"Severus, are you all right?" Jupiter asked, approaching him and placing a thin hand on his black-clad chest. He said nothing, but Jupiter could feel his heart pounding. "Severus-"
Jupiter had no time to finish her sentence before Snape stepped forward angrily, snapped Jupiter up in his arms, and kissed her viciously on the lips. It was full of tension and passion and frustration and heartache, and it ended all too soon. He pulled away and Jupiter gave a disappointed noise, and fell into Severus's chest. She tilted her face up to his and whispered, "Do it again."
Snape sighed heavily, released Jupiter and stalked away across the room.
"Go to your class," he growled, and fell into his chair, digging his fingers into his hair. Jupiter felt as if she would cry, he was not usually this harsh with her. Of course, she reminded herself, it's been more of a hell for him these past two months that it's been for me. I should be more understanding.
She stood for a pensive moment, and watched as Snape rifled mercilessly through papers on his desk. She knew he wasn't reading them, but he knew that Jupiter would leave if he looked busy. She decided to oblige him, and headed to her next class.
***
The rest of her day flew by uneventfully, with Jupiter paying most of her attention to the class (if only to avoid the pain that struck through her when she thought of Severus), except for the classes she had with the new boy. He didn't talk to anyone, indeed, everyone seemed afraid of him. Jupiter didn't blame them. He seemed to have taken a liking to her specifically, because he always sat by her. In fact, he managed to sit next to her in her last period, which was Advanced Divination. Since they had assigned seats (or, rather, assigned poufs), Jupiter couldn't get out of it, and spent most of her time figeting uncomfortably.
This happened for the next few days, and by the end of the third day, Jupiter was getting really annoyed.
She went outside after last period, breathing heavily. Why was he following her? Why couldn't he stop staring at her? It was so hard to concentrate on anything with that great green eye ogling her every move. She walked past the lake, kicking pebbles angrily in front of her.
Why hadn't she just ignored him? Why did she have to be cocky and approach him in the first place? "Damn me," she thought viciously, "Damn me and my stupid ideas."
Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. She spun around, with a good idea of who it was. She was right. Chaos stood behind her, with his evil-looking, crooked smile stretched across his face.
"Lady," he began, "You smell of mint."
"I'm sure we've been through this before!" Jupiter cried, her short temper flaring. She wasn't one to be annoyed by someone all day and just keep it inside. "And for pity's sake, my name is Jupiter!"
"Thank you, Lady," he whispered, and strode off in an odd sort of fashion. Jupiter was terrified and she didn't know why. Something about that boy made her very nervous. She turned and ran inside, and didn't stop running until she was in the Slytherin common room, curled up next to Draco.
"Draco, you remember that Chaos guy?"
"The nutter?"
"Yeah, him. He's frightening," she was saying, curled up underneath his arm, "He follows me around, and keeps telling me I smell of mint."
"Well, you do, you know. Rather strongly, I-"
"Draco! This is not about the way I smell! Would everyone leave the way I smell alone? This is about a weird boy who keeps sitting next to me and calling me 'Lady'!"
"God forbid!" Draco said, with mock offense, "Not that!"
"Shut up, Draco. I mean it."
"Well, what do you want me to do about it? Beat him up for you?"
"You'd do that for me?" she asked.
"No, not really," he answered truthfully. He may not be nice, Jupiter thought, but at least he's honest.
"Besides," Jupiter added, after a while, "You couldn't beat him up. He's twice your size."
Draco was about to say something indignant, when the door swung open and Chaos walked in. He had leaves in his hair and grass stains on his robes. He offered everyone in the common room a crooked Grin and headed into the dorms.
Jupiter looked at Draco, who smiled evilly.
"He has such a charming smile, don't you think?"
Jupiter hit him with a cushion.
***
"Hello, Jupiter!" called a boy from a little ways away. She looked over to where the call had come from. There were two boys there. One was tall, lanky, and red-haired. He was standing next to a shorter, black-haired boy. She made her way over to them.
"How are you?" the short one asked her.
"I'm fine..." she said slowly, "Who are you?"
"My name is Ron Weasley, and this is my friend, Harry Potter," the tall one said, and Jupiter laughed.
"I know who Harry Potter is, thanks. I was referring to you. I've seen you around and heard of you, though it's normally said 'Harry Potter and his red-headed friend,' not vice versa." Ron glared, but Jupiter kept talking. "So what do you want, my brave little Gryffindors?"
"We just wanted to say hi!" Harry said, and smiled at her. Jupiter's jovial air cooled a little and she looked at Harry, trying to see any sign of mischief, any hint of smugness.
"Well. Hi then. But if you'll excuse me, I have some Hufflepuffs to hang. I'll see you around," Jupiter said, a cold edge in her voice. She turned away.
"Wait! I mean, don't go!" Harry cried out. Jupiter turned again and looked at him.
"You know, Potter, you'd make a lousy Slytherin. Now tell me what it is you want so I can continue being mean to the first-years. So many wedgies to give."
"Where's Draco?" Harry turned a little red and added meekly, "I mean Malfoy." Jupiter looked at him oddly.
"As a matter of fact, I don't know. But if you'd like to leave your name, number, and a short message, he'll get back to you," Jupiter said, and smiled. Ron looked about ready to slug her, but Harry forced a laugh.
"Well, do YOU want to hang out?" Harry asked. Ron looked at him incredulously, but Harry ignored it. Jupiter's face echoed Ron's.
"What? 'Hang out'? Potter, are you nuts? Bludger hit you in the head a couple too many times? I'm a Slytherin, remember? I worship the Dark Lord and eat babies?"
It took all of Harry's willpower to maintain his smile. They can't all be like this, Draco's a decent enough guy... "Well, if you see him, will you tell him we want to talk to him?"
"What is it, 'Take a Slytherin Under Your Noble Wing' day? Since when do Gryffindors go looking for Slytherins? Are you going to 'hang out' with him, too?" Jupiter asked, quirking an eyebrow and frowning slightly.
"Geez, I just wanted to know! I'd forgotten how annoying you Slytherins are!" Harry snapped, and walked off. Ron followed him, shouting I-told-you-so's the whole way.
"You dumb Gryffindorks can't even take jokes." Jupiter snapped, and Harry stopped in his tracks.
Slowly, to Jupiter's amazement, he walked back. He seemed resigned, and sighed. "Will you tell Draco we want him?"
"Well," began Jupiter, the side of her mouth twitching up, "I really don't think he's into threesomes, but sure, I'll tell him."
"Harry! Harry!" three boys were rushing up to the group of people, smiling and waving something in the air. "Look at this!" It was a newspaper clipping.
"What is it?" asked Harry. Jupiter couldn't help but be intrigued.
"So," she thought to herself, "This is what Gryffindors do."
"I'll read it to you," said one boy, who Jupiter vaguely recognized as Colin Creevey. "It says:
Recently in Mortein City, home to the Elemental Castles, there was a reported break-in at The Museum of Knicked Knick-Knacks, the popular museum of previously stolen artifacts. Sources say, though, that nothing was stolen. In other news, the Castle of Shadow, long-time tourist attraction and filming place of 'The Muggle', has been shut down for undisclosed reasons.
-Do you suppose that might mean something?" Colin finished, hope gleaming in his eyes. Jupiter laughed hard.
"Don't you suppose it's a bit early in the year to be seeing Dark Lords everywhere?"
Colin blushed a bright red, and Harry glared at Jupiter. Jupiter smiled sweetly, and then turned her attention to the other boy. He was chubby-cheeked and had ear-length sandy brown hair.
"I almost remember you...What's your name again? Nero Longstocking?" she asked, looking under a floppy bang, as if that would help.
"Neville Longbottom," he corrected reproachfully. Jupiter smiled.
"I know. I'm only teasing. It's what we Slytherins do."
"I was under the impression that one thing Slytherins did NOT do, is hang out with Gryffindors." Jupiter looked at the source of the voice. It was Hermione Granger, know-it-all extraordinaire.
"Ah, yes," Jupiter smiled, straightening up, "More Gryffindors. I'll be the envy of all my friends."
Hermione gave Jupiter a scrutinizing look, and Jupiter merely looked coldly amused. "Does it give you any pleasure to stare at me like that?"
Hermione ignored her, and then turned to Harry and began talking animatedly about something Jupiter couldn't care less about. So she began surveying the rest of the group.
She noticed one boy - wasn't his name Sean O'Malley? Something Irish. Finnigan, that's right. Seamus Finnigan. He had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes. Jupiter grinned at him and burst into song:
"There was a sex fiend named Seamus Finnigan, he pulled out but then thrust in again, then his girlfriend hit his chin-iggan, poor old Seamus Finnigan, begin again! There was a big dork called Seamus Finnigan, he wants to be Slytherin-iggan, but he just would not fit in-iggan, dumb old Seamus Finnigan, begin again!"
Seamus glared at her, but it soon morphed into a big, triumphant smile. Then he pulled out Jupiter's wand from behind his back and grinned, showing all his teeth. In a second, he was sprinting off across the courtyard. Jupiter took off after him.
"If this is your idea of flirting, Finnigan, I'll tell you now that I only like older men!" she cried, but Seamus appeared not to hear her. "You lousy Gryffindor, give me...back...my wand..."
Jupiter slowed to a stop and fell to the ground. She was clutching her chest and throat with her thin hands, and was desperately trying to breathe. Within moments, all the Gryffindors had crowded around her, blocking out the red twilight that was shining in her eyes.
"Are you all right?" Harry asked, leaning over her.
"I have (gasp) asthma, and it's (wheeze) horrid," Jupiter lapsed into a coughing fit, "And if I ever get my (deep breath) hands on him, (yawn) Finnigan's dead," she said, between wheezing breaths.
Hermione looked snooty. "Well, you DID start it."
Harry snatched Jupiter's wand from Seamus's hand and handed it to Jupiter, who ignored its presence on her lap. If she'd looked up, she would have seen Seamus looking acutely embarrassed, and she probably would have been surprised. That, however, was lost on her.
"What's going on?" came a boy's voice from outside the circle.
"Hello," Jupiter wheezed again, "Draco."
"Jupiter, what the hell are you doing surrounded by Gryffindors?"
"They're my Gryffindor Sixth Years collection. I've nearly got the whole set!" she said. "Not Colin, of course."
Draco pointed his wand at her chest and said "Respiro."
Soon, Jupiter's breathing returned to normal. She stood up and looked at Finnigan. "You," she said, "Are an idiot!" And she stormed off, singing the Seamus Finnigan song. Seamus looked angry, but the rest of the group shushed him, and they walked off.
And so it was that Jupiter left the courtyard, and went to the Slytherin girls' dorm. She went to the end of the dormitory and opened the door to her room, profoundly glad that prefects get their own quarters. She shut the door and walked over to her bed. With no more ado, she lay down, and fell asleep.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Coming up: Will Chaos kill Jupiter? Will Snape kill her first? What's up with Harry and Ron? Why did Draco walk away with them? Why is there a Harry Potter trading card stuck to my foot? All these questions answered and more, in the following episode of Volva a Scelus, which sounds really obscene.
Author: Katu Backwards
Author email: katubish@hotmail.com
Rating: R (ish)
Summary: When a new boy begins school at Hogwarts, everything goes splodey. Sex, Voldemort, arguments, secrets, heroism, blood, and fluffy kittens named Foofkins.
Disclaimer: Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, and so on, do not belong to me. As you might have guessed. Chaos Aberidge is mine, Jupiter is mine, so on and so forth. Use 'em if you want, just link me. By link me I mean give me the link.
The normal rule goes, if you want to know when I update, leave your e-mail in a review and tell me so. I can think of nothing to disprove this.
Constructive criticism welcome and encouraged.
Various mild ideas including but not limited to; humour style, beginning-of-chapter information, ending-of-chapter summary, and some random information (ie - Draco's middle name being Thomas, etc), borrowed from the oh-so-talented, charmingly bohemian, tragically impoverish writer Cassandra Claire.
And now we return you to your regularly scheduled fic.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Headnotes:
* Commonly known as a Grin. © Lacci De Vrij/Emma Matson
---------------------
It was a a dark morning in August, and Jupiter had just awoken. She'd had the dream again, the nightmare that had haunted her since she was tiny. Only now it had her vision from the Hall of Shadow in it. She sat up in bed, holding her sheets to her heaving chest, and slowly waited for the fear to subside and her heartbeat to slow. Her breathing returned to normal, and she tried to ignore the burning depression that set in. She thought of him again, and how she missed him.
Severus had been gone for two months now, spying again for Dumbledore. Jupiter was naturally concerned about him, and very upset that she didn't get to see him anymore. Occasionally she would see him, walking through the hallways, looking like a man who had hang-glided over hell. She would shout to him, and sometimes he would hear, sometimes he wouldn't. If he did hear, he'd send her a glance over his shoulder. It would be sorrowful and lonely, but it was something. She found herself scanning the hallways for him each and every day, hoping she would see him. She rarely did.
As she got dressed, she switched to more happy thoughts, such as the fact that classes start today, and how she still had filing to do. She looked over at the clock on her nightstand, its red numbers proclaimed that it was only 5am. It was probably best, she had a lot of work to do.
It was raining outside, and through the darkness, cold rain was spattering against her windows. She sighed longingly and walked to one of them, forgetting her obligations as she unlatched the window with a lazy finger and opened it. The cold, wet air rushed into her room, and Jupiter breathed it deeply. She loved the rain, and as the tiny droplets of water drenched her face and torso, she settled into a sort of warm, cozy depression.
Her black hair stuck to her cheeks doggedly as she stared out into the gloom, humming to herself.
"You'll catch your death of cold that way, my dear." came an amused voice from Jupiter's doorway. She smiled into the storm, not opening her eyes.
"Good morning, Draco," she said, "What brings you up here?"
Draco shrugged, though Jupiter couldn't see. "Felt like it. Didn't sleep last night."
Jupiter laughed a little. "I'd scold you if I cared."
"Yeah, just felt like coming up and saying hi. I was rather hoping I could wake you up in an annoying manner, though."
"Mhmm..." he could tell Jupiter was too focused on the falling rain.
"Hey, shut that window and pay attention to me," Draco said, coming up and putting a hand on Jupiter's shoulder. Draco hadn't come up to visit his friend just to be ignored.
She shut the window and turned around. "Yes, Draco?"
Jupiter was soaked, at least from her shoulders up. Her long black hair was matted to her face, and her white cotton nightdress clung to her in a way that Draco might have found sexy, had he not been totally impervious to Jupiter's charms. Not that she used them on him anyway.
"Just wanted to talk to you about something..." He said. He obviously, Juptier thought, had something on his mind. He was usually much more snotty than this.
"What's that?" She asked. She walked over to her dresser and pulled out a baggy white button-up dress shirt (probably expensive), and a long black skirt. She undressed, much to Draco's annoyance, and then donned her drier clothes.
"Geez, Jupiter, it's hard to be serious with you when you're naked," He said, petulantly.
"Don't see why not," Jupiter said, and sat crosslegged at the head of her bed. "And besides, I'm not naked now. Have a seat."
Draco sighed and sat on Jupiter's green comforter. It had silver lining. "Jupiter, I'm having problems. Seriously. My father, he's been on the rampage recently."
Jupiter nodded, and began wringing out her wet hair over the side of the bed. "How so?"
"Just...Trying to get me to join the Dark Side and whatnot."
Jupiter looked surprised, and sat up. "I thought you wanted that," she said, with little emotion in her voice.
"I used to think I did, I was all for it in my second year, but...I don't know...I've grown since then. I think I've grown past it." Jupiter's face didn't move. Draco couldn't tell what she was thinking, but he wasn't worried about it. He continued speaking, blindly. "I really don't know how to deal with it. Lately, well, you see...I've made friends with a few people I know my father won't approve of, and-"
"Sod your father, Draco." Jupiter said simply. Draco goggled, he had expected her to have some words of comfort, or at least some good advice. Of course, that could have been her good advice...Either case, Draco didn't feel like pursuing it.
"There's another thing..." he said quietly. Jupiter cocked her head to one side inquisitively. "You remember Champagne?"
"Champagne..." Jupiter echoed, "The Wronski girl?"
"The same."
"Yes, I remember her. Long blonde hair, blue eyes, entirely too skinny."
Draco smiled a little. "Yeah."
"What about her?"
"Well, she's been owling me." Draco began rubbing his satin pajamas nervously.
"She couldn't be! Not owling you! The nerve!"
"Well, you haven't read what she's been writing to me..." Draco said quietly. Jupiter's mock look of horror suddenly morphed into a wide, perverted grin.
"Tell me, Draco. Tell me what she wrote you."
Draco shook his head. "I couldn't have said that to you, even when we were dating."
Jupiter's eyebrows shot up and she paused in the braiding of her long hair for a moment, her mouth curled into a highly amused smile. "Well then, thinking of asking her out?"
Draco shook his head. "See, that's the thing. I don't know if I want to, yet. I'm not really sure how to react to these letters."
Jupiter looked sincere. "I would honestly suggest," and the side of her mouth twitched, "That you write back."
Draco laughed. "Why did I think you would help me?"
"Because you're such a trusting soul, Draco," Jupiter said, and the both of them laughed.
"So, why are you up so early?" Draco asked, and Jupiter's smile faded only slightly.
"Had a nightmare. The usual, Voldemort and Severus. And I have work to do. I have a lot of student profiles I was supposed to submit a week ago. Dumbledore's pretty lenient, but I need them in his office in four hours."
Draco still couldn't understand how Jupiter got to be so forward in all her classes, got to be a Prefect, and Head of Student Relations, with her lazy attitude and sarcastic tongue. He sighed. "Want some help?"
"Oughtn't you go to bed, young man?" Jupiter smiled mockingly.
"Why bother?"
"Sure, have a seat." Jupiter finished braiding her hair and tied it off with a pastel blue ribbon. She lifted her wand off her nightstand and aimed it at a trunk at the opposite side of the room. "Wingardium Leviosa!" The trunk lifted effortlessly, and flew up to Jupiter's bed, landing lightly beside it. She prodded a place on the side of it, and it popped open. Inside were piles and piles of papers, neatly organised and rather intimidating.
"You're a bloody nutter, Jupiter."
"Yep. I love this job."
They began filing throug applicants, marking down allergies and schedules on separate sheets of papers, and laughing at irregularities in the students, not an uncommon occurence at Hogwarts.
Jupiter chuckled, "Look at this one! It's a pirate!" There was a picture of a boy with grey-white hair, and an eye patch. "Height, 6'6"? Holy Bludger! It's a monster pirate! And his name is Chaos? Oh, no, his name is Jason. Likes to be called Chaos. Captain Chaos!"
"Let me see," Draco said, and took the paper from her. "He's 18, and a pure blood. Only he's an orphan, now, if that term applies to 18 year olds. Lives with aunt in London...boring boring boring...la la la..." Draco continued to mumble as he looked it over. "Sounds like a real head case."
"Well, they do mention that his previous school was a mental institution."
They marked his information down and continued filing through papers until eight. Jupiter pressed a small button by her window, and soon, Fawkes came swooping down. They'd worked that out last year, as Fawkes was more able to carry all the packets of information up than a normal owl. When the phoenix flew out the window, Jupiter turned to Draco.
"Escort me to breakfast?" she asked, smiling. Draco nodded, and Jupiter grabbed her school robes, donned them, and the two walked down to The Great Hall, arm in arm.
***
When she and Draco arrived at the Slytherin table, which was on the far end of the Great Hall, Jupiter pointed at a familiar silver-blond head. "Look, it's him, it's Chaos."
"Well then," said Draco, "You'd better go talk to him. I have to attend to Pansy."
Draco wandered over to Pansy, who began to fawn all over him the moment he sat down. Jupiter laughed internally, some girls were so weird. She sat down by the new boy and looked at him.
"Good morning, Chaos," she said, and smiled at him. She delighted in knowing everyone's name before having met them. But the boy's pale face was devoid of any of the usual shock. Instead, spread across it was the most crooked, disturbing smile* Jupiter had ever seen. It was her turn to be nonplussed. She let her disconcertion show for only a second before replacing it with an automatic, and totally plastic, smile.
"Good morning, Lady," he said, and his voice was...indescribable. But the effort will be made. It was not deep, nor was it high. It was a little raspy, yet had a tendency to slide over words. Imagine taking a smooth piece of glass, covering it in honey, and rubbing it against a piece of coarse sandpaper, and that is almost how his voice sounded. Jupiter hadn't, in her entire life, heard a voice like it.
Jupiter didn't know what else to say, this boy wasn't reacting the way normal students would. It was awfully disconcerting. His profile information came rushing back to her. What was he institutionalized for? Criminal insanity? Borderline personality disorder? Kleptomania? Whatever the charges, Jupiter suddenly decided she no longer wanted to be next to the boy.
She looked away and skewered a bit of toast with her fork. She became aware of a distinct sniffing noise. She turned back to Chaos, he was smelling her! She gave him an askance look and turned back to her toast, putting some fried tomato and melted cheese on the top. She was doing her best to ignore the boy.
"You smell of mint, Lady," he said quietly, and Jupiter looked back at him. She nodded. He Grinned again at her and then turned away, back to his food. Jupiter shook her head, this boy was nuts. She stood and wandered away from the table, suddenly ceasing to be hungry. It was too important to put distance between her and the boy.
***
Later, Jupiter discovered that she had a few classes with the new boy, one of which was Potions, which was second period. She walked into the room, and looked at the walls. Her stomach gave a sick lurch of longing as her eyes scanned the walls of jars and the empty desk. She wondered who would be teaching. She moved to her usual seat, next to Deviancy Muggle. Deviancy was a tall, scrawny, and intelligent Slytherin girl with an unfortunate last name.
Moments later, Chaos walked in and saw Jupiter. He gave her the disgruntling smile again and sat in the seat directly behind her. Deviancy leaned over and said, "What a strange looking boy, is he new?"
Jupiter nodded. "He gives me the creeps. He SMELLED me earlier!"
"It's hard not to. You wear a lot of perfume."
"It's not perfume," Jupiter began defensively, "it's an oil, a lotion. And I don't wear lots of it. It's just very strong. I'm not even wearing any today!"
"Suit yourself. It smells like you're wearing it."
"Any case, I meant he leaned over and sniffed me. It was weird."
"Well," Deviancy said, "We Slytherins aren't always know for our sanity. After all-"
Jupiter had stopped paying attention. She wondered who'd be filling in for Severus today, since he was off spying. She bent down to look through her bag for her schedule, so she could check and see if it said. The classroom door opened and shut, and Jupiter was just pulling her schedule out of a side pocket when she heard a strict clearing of the throat. She snapped up in her seat and looked straight ahead, hardly daring to believe what her eyes told her. It was Snape! She resisted the urge to squeal in delight and instead, sat raptly at attention. He looked gaunt and tired, more so than usual, but no one else seemed to notice, much less care.
"Welcome to Potions class," he said, though he didn't sound at all welcoming, "I would like to say that it will be a competant year, but I doubt it. All I can honestly hope for is that some of you will leave this class marginally more intelligent than you were previously," he said in a low monotone, his eyes flicking distastefully over the Gryffindor side of the classroom. Jupiter noticed that Draco (who had been upped to the next level of Potions, and subsequently put in Jupiter's class), wasn't there.
Jupiter turned her thoughts back to Severus, who was checking that everyone had their textbooks. A Gryffindor, typically, didn't have his, and lost Gryffindor five points. The Gryffindors groaned and lost another two for complaining about a fair punishment. Most of the Slytherins sniggered smugly, which Snape ignored. Things seemed to be normal.
Snape gave them a written assignment about potion ingredients, and things pretty much progressed as usual, except that Jupiter had a lot more questions than were really warranted. She knew all the answers, but why should she pass up a great opportunity? It was a perfect excuse to have Severus hovering over her, and pointing out various principles and rules of potion-making, all of which she'd known since her first year. She could smell him, she could feel his body heat against her back as he leaned over her.
Severus seemed to note her sudden stupidity, too, because when she raised her hand for the umpteenth time he said, with a touch of cruel amusement, "Since, Miss Vrij, you seem to have left your brains in your common room, why don't you see me after class."
It was not a question, and it was not phrased nicely. The Gryffindors gasped at Snape making a mean comment to one of his precious Slytherins, but Jupiter was ecstatic.
Jupiter failed to pay attention all through the rest of the class, which Snape turned a blind eye to. When class was finally over, Jupiter waved good-bye to a few of her friends, who winked devilishly at her, and she laughed. Then the classroom was empty, except for the two. Snape shut the door and walked over to where Jupiter was standing. He didn't speak, or do anything except stare at Jupiter. Jupiter looked at the floor and broke the silence.
"I-I've missed you a lot, Severus," Jupiter said. Snape said nothing, so Jupiter spoke to fill the space, "It's been hard without you not owling all summer. I've kept asking Dumbledore about you, and even he's not always sure if you're all right. It's been hell without you! How have things been with you? Is everything well? Voldemort hasn't tried to hurt you, has he?" There was a long silence, and Severus's head was hanging tiredly. "...Severus? Severus, are you all right?"
Snape lifted his head with some difficulty. "For Christ's sake, no, Jupiter! I've spent the last two months running around, doing errands for the Dark Lord! Just being in his presence takes everything out of me. He suspects me of being unfaithful, and being around even the dumber Death Eaters reduces me to a nervous, paranoid wreck. I don't know how long I can keep doing this. Now shut up and just let me have a moment of peace with you. Please," he added harshly, his black eyes losing a bit of their anger.
Jupiter nodded apologetically and Severus wrapped her up in his arms. She hugged him back, and they stood that way for what seemed an hour, before Severus pulled away, breathing heavily. Jupiter suspected it wasn't being in such close proximity to him that was causing his breath to come quickly.
"Severus, are you all right?" Jupiter asked, approaching him and placing a thin hand on his black-clad chest. He said nothing, but Jupiter could feel his heart pounding. "Severus-"
Jupiter had no time to finish her sentence before Snape stepped forward angrily, snapped Jupiter up in his arms, and kissed her viciously on the lips. It was full of tension and passion and frustration and heartache, and it ended all too soon. He pulled away and Jupiter gave a disappointed noise, and fell into Severus's chest. She tilted her face up to his and whispered, "Do it again."
Snape sighed heavily, released Jupiter and stalked away across the room.
"Go to your class," he growled, and fell into his chair, digging his fingers into his hair. Jupiter felt as if she would cry, he was not usually this harsh with her. Of course, she reminded herself, it's been more of a hell for him these past two months that it's been for me. I should be more understanding.
She stood for a pensive moment, and watched as Snape rifled mercilessly through papers on his desk. She knew he wasn't reading them, but he knew that Jupiter would leave if he looked busy. She decided to oblige him, and headed to her next class.
***
The rest of her day flew by uneventfully, with Jupiter paying most of her attention to the class (if only to avoid the pain that struck through her when she thought of Severus), except for the classes she had with the new boy. He didn't talk to anyone, indeed, everyone seemed afraid of him. Jupiter didn't blame them. He seemed to have taken a liking to her specifically, because he always sat by her. In fact, he managed to sit next to her in her last period, which was Advanced Divination. Since they had assigned seats (or, rather, assigned poufs), Jupiter couldn't get out of it, and spent most of her time figeting uncomfortably.
This happened for the next few days, and by the end of the third day, Jupiter was getting really annoyed.
She went outside after last period, breathing heavily. Why was he following her? Why couldn't he stop staring at her? It was so hard to concentrate on anything with that great green eye ogling her every move. She walked past the lake, kicking pebbles angrily in front of her.
Why hadn't she just ignored him? Why did she have to be cocky and approach him in the first place? "Damn me," she thought viciously, "Damn me and my stupid ideas."
Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. She spun around, with a good idea of who it was. She was right. Chaos stood behind her, with his evil-looking, crooked smile stretched across his face.
"Lady," he began, "You smell of mint."
"I'm sure we've been through this before!" Jupiter cried, her short temper flaring. She wasn't one to be annoyed by someone all day and just keep it inside. "And for pity's sake, my name is Jupiter!"
"Thank you, Lady," he whispered, and strode off in an odd sort of fashion. Jupiter was terrified and she didn't know why. Something about that boy made her very nervous. She turned and ran inside, and didn't stop running until she was in the Slytherin common room, curled up next to Draco.
"Draco, you remember that Chaos guy?"
"The nutter?"
"Yeah, him. He's frightening," she was saying, curled up underneath his arm, "He follows me around, and keeps telling me I smell of mint."
"Well, you do, you know. Rather strongly, I-"
"Draco! This is not about the way I smell! Would everyone leave the way I smell alone? This is about a weird boy who keeps sitting next to me and calling me 'Lady'!"
"God forbid!" Draco said, with mock offense, "Not that!"
"Shut up, Draco. I mean it."
"Well, what do you want me to do about it? Beat him up for you?"
"You'd do that for me?" she asked.
"No, not really," he answered truthfully. He may not be nice, Jupiter thought, but at least he's honest.
"Besides," Jupiter added, after a while, "You couldn't beat him up. He's twice your size."
Draco was about to say something indignant, when the door swung open and Chaos walked in. He had leaves in his hair and grass stains on his robes. He offered everyone in the common room a crooked Grin and headed into the dorms.
Jupiter looked at Draco, who smiled evilly.
"He has such a charming smile, don't you think?"
Jupiter hit him with a cushion.
***
"Hello, Jupiter!" called a boy from a little ways away. She looked over to where the call had come from. There were two boys there. One was tall, lanky, and red-haired. He was standing next to a shorter, black-haired boy. She made her way over to them.
"How are you?" the short one asked her.
"I'm fine..." she said slowly, "Who are you?"
"My name is Ron Weasley, and this is my friend, Harry Potter," the tall one said, and Jupiter laughed.
"I know who Harry Potter is, thanks. I was referring to you. I've seen you around and heard of you, though it's normally said 'Harry Potter and his red-headed friend,' not vice versa." Ron glared, but Jupiter kept talking. "So what do you want, my brave little Gryffindors?"
"We just wanted to say hi!" Harry said, and smiled at her. Jupiter's jovial air cooled a little and she looked at Harry, trying to see any sign of mischief, any hint of smugness.
"Well. Hi then. But if you'll excuse me, I have some Hufflepuffs to hang. I'll see you around," Jupiter said, a cold edge in her voice. She turned away.
"Wait! I mean, don't go!" Harry cried out. Jupiter turned again and looked at him.
"You know, Potter, you'd make a lousy Slytherin. Now tell me what it is you want so I can continue being mean to the first-years. So many wedgies to give."
"Where's Draco?" Harry turned a little red and added meekly, "I mean Malfoy." Jupiter looked at him oddly.
"As a matter of fact, I don't know. But if you'd like to leave your name, number, and a short message, he'll get back to you," Jupiter said, and smiled. Ron looked about ready to slug her, but Harry forced a laugh.
"Well, do YOU want to hang out?" Harry asked. Ron looked at him incredulously, but Harry ignored it. Jupiter's face echoed Ron's.
"What? 'Hang out'? Potter, are you nuts? Bludger hit you in the head a couple too many times? I'm a Slytherin, remember? I worship the Dark Lord and eat babies?"
It took all of Harry's willpower to maintain his smile. They can't all be like this, Draco's a decent enough guy... "Well, if you see him, will you tell him we want to talk to him?"
"What is it, 'Take a Slytherin Under Your Noble Wing' day? Since when do Gryffindors go looking for Slytherins? Are you going to 'hang out' with him, too?" Jupiter asked, quirking an eyebrow and frowning slightly.
"Geez, I just wanted to know! I'd forgotten how annoying you Slytherins are!" Harry snapped, and walked off. Ron followed him, shouting I-told-you-so's the whole way.
"You dumb Gryffindorks can't even take jokes." Jupiter snapped, and Harry stopped in his tracks.
Slowly, to Jupiter's amazement, he walked back. He seemed resigned, and sighed. "Will you tell Draco we want him?"
"Well," began Jupiter, the side of her mouth twitching up, "I really don't think he's into threesomes, but sure, I'll tell him."
"Harry! Harry!" three boys were rushing up to the group of people, smiling and waving something in the air. "Look at this!" It was a newspaper clipping.
"What is it?" asked Harry. Jupiter couldn't help but be intrigued.
"So," she thought to herself, "This is what Gryffindors do."
"I'll read it to you," said one boy, who Jupiter vaguely recognized as Colin Creevey. "It says:
Recently in Mortein City, home to the Elemental Castles, there was a reported break-in at The Museum of Knicked Knick-Knacks, the popular museum of previously stolen artifacts. Sources say, though, that nothing was stolen. In other news, the Castle of Shadow, long-time tourist attraction and filming place of 'The Muggle', has been shut down for undisclosed reasons.
-Do you suppose that might mean something?" Colin finished, hope gleaming in his eyes. Jupiter laughed hard.
"Don't you suppose it's a bit early in the year to be seeing Dark Lords everywhere?"
Colin blushed a bright red, and Harry glared at Jupiter. Jupiter smiled sweetly, and then turned her attention to the other boy. He was chubby-cheeked and had ear-length sandy brown hair.
"I almost remember you...What's your name again? Nero Longstocking?" she asked, looking under a floppy bang, as if that would help.
"Neville Longbottom," he corrected reproachfully. Jupiter smiled.
"I know. I'm only teasing. It's what we Slytherins do."
"I was under the impression that one thing Slytherins did NOT do, is hang out with Gryffindors." Jupiter looked at the source of the voice. It was Hermione Granger, know-it-all extraordinaire.
"Ah, yes," Jupiter smiled, straightening up, "More Gryffindors. I'll be the envy of all my friends."
Hermione gave Jupiter a scrutinizing look, and Jupiter merely looked coldly amused. "Does it give you any pleasure to stare at me like that?"
Hermione ignored her, and then turned to Harry and began talking animatedly about something Jupiter couldn't care less about. So she began surveying the rest of the group.
She noticed one boy - wasn't his name Sean O'Malley? Something Irish. Finnigan, that's right. Seamus Finnigan. He had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes. Jupiter grinned at him and burst into song:
"There was a sex fiend named Seamus Finnigan, he pulled out but then thrust in again, then his girlfriend hit his chin-iggan, poor old Seamus Finnigan, begin again! There was a big dork called Seamus Finnigan, he wants to be Slytherin-iggan, but he just would not fit in-iggan, dumb old Seamus Finnigan, begin again!"
Seamus glared at her, but it soon morphed into a big, triumphant smile. Then he pulled out Jupiter's wand from behind his back and grinned, showing all his teeth. In a second, he was sprinting off across the courtyard. Jupiter took off after him.
"If this is your idea of flirting, Finnigan, I'll tell you now that I only like older men!" she cried, but Seamus appeared not to hear her. "You lousy Gryffindor, give me...back...my wand..."
Jupiter slowed to a stop and fell to the ground. She was clutching her chest and throat with her thin hands, and was desperately trying to breathe. Within moments, all the Gryffindors had crowded around her, blocking out the red twilight that was shining in her eyes.
"Are you all right?" Harry asked, leaning over her.
"I have (gasp) asthma, and it's (wheeze) horrid," Jupiter lapsed into a coughing fit, "And if I ever get my (deep breath) hands on him, (yawn) Finnigan's dead," she said, between wheezing breaths.
Hermione looked snooty. "Well, you DID start it."
Harry snatched Jupiter's wand from Seamus's hand and handed it to Jupiter, who ignored its presence on her lap. If she'd looked up, she would have seen Seamus looking acutely embarrassed, and she probably would have been surprised. That, however, was lost on her.
"What's going on?" came a boy's voice from outside the circle.
"Hello," Jupiter wheezed again, "Draco."
"Jupiter, what the hell are you doing surrounded by Gryffindors?"
"They're my Gryffindor Sixth Years collection. I've nearly got the whole set!" she said. "Not Colin, of course."
Draco pointed his wand at her chest and said "Respiro."
Soon, Jupiter's breathing returned to normal. She stood up and looked at Finnigan. "You," she said, "Are an idiot!" And she stormed off, singing the Seamus Finnigan song. Seamus looked angry, but the rest of the group shushed him, and they walked off.
And so it was that Jupiter left the courtyard, and went to the Slytherin girls' dorm. She went to the end of the dormitory and opened the door to her room, profoundly glad that prefects get their own quarters. She shut the door and walked over to her bed. With no more ado, she lay down, and fell asleep.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Coming up: Will Chaos kill Jupiter? Will Snape kill her first? What's up with Harry and Ron? Why did Draco walk away with them? Why is there a Harry Potter trading card stuck to my foot? All these questions answered and more, in the following episode of Volva a Scelus, which sounds really obscene.