So I know this is a short chapter and it's not the best but I wanted to update now because I won't be able to start writing the next chapter until June. My work has to come first unfortunately but I hope this chapter will be okay enough!

Don't forget to leave a review or any suggestions for what you want to happen.

Thanks.

Parker.

'Oh Steve I don't even know where to start'

She handed him the plane ticket and watched his confusion as he inspected the name and destination of the small piece of card.

'This doesn't make sense Natasha, first of all how did you even have time to buy this, second of all Natalia Romanova isn't your name and last but not least, why would you want to go back to Russia after you nearly got killed their less than a week ago?'

As Nat was about to open her mouth and ring tone from an outdated Nokia phone went off and Steve frantically searched his pockets.

'Shit, it's Tony' he whispered.

God how difficult this is gonna be to explain. I should have just left when I had the chance.

Maybe Anna was right about me going soft, I shouldn't care yet i still do... is this a curse or a cure?

'Hello Tony'

'Steve... I've just walked in to Nats room and she's gone! Where the fuck is she?!'

'Firstly, erm language. And come to the cafe, hopefully things should start to make sense'

Before Tony could go on a rant about everything Steve hung up the phone and looked at Natasha in a way to tell her to get on with it.

'May aswell wait for Tony since we can all have a 'What the hell is going on with Nat' party!' Annoyance pinged of her voice as the more time she spent explaining the situation she was in the more danger people were left in.

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, admiring each others features. She could see his mind working over each little fact and figure which it could try to explain. Her heart ached for him, she knew how much he cared for her and the feeling was mutual. But Nat being Nat, she'd never perused anything to do with her heart.

'Emotions are your downfall and by showing them you risk your life. The pain and the anger you feel must replace the warmth in your heart.'

'Kill or be killed'

'When death follows you, you must embrace it. Let the anger in, let it take over'

Constantly, those words swam around her head infiltrating her thoughts. These were words she'd lived by since day one had no meaning to her now, she had love and friendship and learnt more about the world in the time she spent with the avengers than she ever did. However with these friendships came the burden of love and as she pondered over everything she didn't even notice Tony Stark come and sit right in front of her.

Shit he doesn't look happy

As he was about to open his mouth, Natasha interjected.

'Before you ramble on about how shit I'm being, just know I need to do this and whatever you say won't stop me.'

At that point Tony and Steve looked at each other in confusion.

'What is it you need to do Nat?' Steve asked, his voice practically coming out his mouth like silk.

'I've gotta go back.' She said quietly, looking at the table.

'Where?'

At this point Steve had grabbed onto her twitching hands, gently massaging her fingers together in an attempt to calm her down.

'The Red Room.'

At this point Tony and Steve were confused as hell, they didn't know much of this red room but they knew enough.

Frowning Tony said what needed to be said.

'Red, I beg of you. Start from the beginning. Just tell us what's going on and we can help you!'

Quick as a flash, Natasha replied with a burst of 'no'.

'No, no, no. I'm not loosing you guys, you cannot help. And I don't have enough time Tony. My flight leaves in 6 hours and I need to go.'

'Flight? What flight?'

Jesus we are going round in circles...

'Natasha please. Just tell me why you need to leave.'

How can I resist those puppy eyes? Oh god I can't tell you but...

Then it just poured out of her.

'I... i... my real name is Natalia Romanova. I'm a ex Russian spy who was trained and tested on since birth at a facility called the red room. After completing my training I killed everyone there and burn the place to the ground. Years later Clint finds me, I work for S.H.I.E.L.D and I end up an avenger. Happy?'

'No, not really?' Steve was riddled with confusion.

'Wait, so why are you going back?' Asked Tony.

'When we were on that mission, the person who attacked me was an ex- red room trainee. I thought I killed her but I guess not. She was pretty pissed that I was the best in class so yeah. She wants a final battle or else shit happens.' Nat decided to miss out the details on how practically everyone from the red room had survived and that they swore revenge on her and the avengers just for being affiliated with her.

'What type of shit?' Tony's voice was low, really low. She knew the low tone as 'oh crap this is bad'.

Too many questions and too little time, I need to go. Now. I can't let them die.

Natasha was getting agitated. Both Steve and Tony could see the blood seeping through her gown and the fact that she hadn't looked them in the eye since she started speaking wasn't at all a good sign too.

'Just bad shit which I can't allow to happen! Okay?!' She jumped up, a little too quickly for the matter, and grabbed her gym bag. The only thing she needed was the plane tickets, which seemed to be in the hands of Tony Stark. He noticed this and stood up himself, holding the tickets up in the air making sure they were unreachable. Something the action of a young child would do when not wanting to give back their favourite toy.

'Give me the tickets Tony' Her voice was cold and hard, Steve could see the conflicting emotions rise in her face. From his days in the 1940s he was always good at reading emotions on people's faces. He knew she was in pain, he saw that she was angry, a hint of regret maybe?

'No tickets until I get answers and if I'm honest no tickets at all. Nat you could die. Jeez you probably will die unless you talk to us. We are a team. A Team! Yano the ones with no I in? So stop dicking around Natasha or Natalia or whatever I'm meant to call you! Your one of my best friends and I refuse to loose you. Okay?' Natasha looked him dead in the eyes. Reading his face, admiring the well cut edges of his beard. She noticed that his eyes were going red, either he was having an allergic reaction to peanuts or he was crying. Damn how she hoped and prayed for the peanuts.

Through all this time Steve hadn't got up from his seat, he just sat there, hand on his head trying to process the information that was given to him. Every cell in his body ached with confusion and fear, fear for Nat's safety and fear that this would end up well for himself either.

Natasha had no other option but to tell them. Exhaustion taking a toll on her she sat in silence opposite Steve. She knew they wouldn't let her leave but she couldn't let them die. A part of her brain was screaming at her, telling her that they were the goddamn avengers and that they could look after themselves. Another part told her the facts, things such as the fact that she didn't know how many from the red room were alive, they could be listening, they could be literally anywhere, watching her every move and listening to her every word.

They could be listening to me right now. Think Natasha Think!

Then a lightbulb went off in her brain. Reaching into her bag she pulled out a pen and frantically scribbled words onto a napkin, then she scrunched it up seeming like she was finished with it.

'No Tony, I'm leaving whatever you say'

She went up to him and hugged him, not only enjoying the contact but whispering in his ears the exact words 'I'm gonna go get my stitches changed and when I get back down I need a taxi and a jet. Send it someone quiet. Ill explain the rest later.'

The instructions were clear she hoped but if not she slipped the napkin into his hands whilst initiating the hug.

Then she looked at Steve, his puppy dog eyes were so hard to look at, in fact his whole facial expression was difficult to look at. Not even caring about her reputation she kissed him. Though it was brief and not very passionate they both knew what it meant to each other.

'Im sorry' Her warm breath on his ear made him shudder. She left both Avengers looking dazed and confused praying to god that they both understood what they needed to do. Walking back to the lift thought swirled her brain, most of them mainly about Steve. She knew how confused he was and god knows how upset he must be, Nat just hoped that after all she puts him through, she will have a chance to repay him.

'Come on lover boy, we've got work to do'