Title : Family

Author : Aset

They had quickly cleaned up some rooms, and their friends had settled down before the evening fell. Cordelia hadn't really talked to one of the Scoobies since they arrived. Only a quick 'Hi, how are you ?' with Xander, but he'd been really quiet. Probably some trouble with Anya, she'd talk to him later on. Willow spent most of the time with Buffy, and the Slayer avoided her and Angel. In a way she felt sorry for Buffy, but she'd always treated her like dirt back in Sunnydale. Okay, she'd been Queen C, bitch first-class, but she'd looked upon the Scoobies as her friends, and they'd mocked her, Buffy most of all.

Dawn had been nice, they had had a little talk. School went well, she even had had a boyfriend. She was doing just fine.

She moved on through the hall and stopped in front of Willow's room. She knocked.

'Willow, it's me, Cordy. Can I come in ?'

Willow opened the door, already dressed in her pyjama's

'Sure' a smile. They went to sit down on the bed.

'So…How are you ?' Cordy asked with that radiant smile, so typically hers.

'I'm…I'm okay.' A sigh, 'Tara and I broke up…'

'Oh, Willow ! I'm so sorry' she gently touched her hand.

'She thought I was using too much magic.'

'Oh, Willow' Again that voice. She really did feel sorry.

'It's okay, Cordelia. It' s better this way…So you and Angel, huh ?'

'Yeah'

'I'm happy for you guys. You make a great couple !'

'I guess Buffy isn't too happy about it.'

'She is…She just needs some time to adjust to the thought'

Silence. Willow looked at Cordelia. She really had changed. Not only the haircut, but her attitude, less bichy, more compassion. 'She's got someone now though, well not anymore but…'

'Who ?'

'Spike'

'Spike as in Vampire Spike ?'

'Yeah'

Cordelia fought back a chuckle. 'She does have a thing for vampires' she thought, 'But she should keep her hand of my man !'

'Well good for her !' she said with a smile

'Cordelia ?' Willow shifted a bit uncomfortably on the bed, 'Are…euh…have you…you know…you and Angel..that thing.. ?'

Cordy started to laugh, good old Willow ! 'Yes'

'But you are aware of the curse-thing, right ?'

'Duh ! The moment-of-true-happiness-thing blahblahblah, Angelus, yaddayaddayadda, yeah, sure !' But with Connor gone he'll never reach that.'

'Fred mailed us for help'

Cordelia forced a weak smile. 'I don't know if any one really can help. I haven't got any visions on Connor or Holtz, and then there's the baby…' 'Ohoh ! Said to much' she thought

'Baby ? You're …pregnant ?'

A blush on her cheeks, 'Yes'

'But how…Cordelia ?'

'I don't really know with the whole vampire-thing, but I guess the PTB…'

'The what ?' Willow asked, placing her hand on Cordy's. Cordelia had started to cry, much to the surprise of Willow. She really loved Angel's baby.

'PTB…The Powers That Be..the things who send me the visions…I'm scared, Willow…I'm scared they're granting us this baby to ease the loss of Connor.'

'Oh, Cordelia !' Willow put an arm around her, trying to comfort her. Angel's lost a child, but Cordelia too ; even though she wasn't Connor's biological mother. Love goes beyond the blood.

'Please don't tell them' Cordy said as she pulled back and started drying her tears.

'I..I won't.' Cordelia stoop up and headed for the door

'Thanks Willow'

'Cordelia ?…We'll help you find Connor, I promise'

Cordelia smiled ; 'Thanks', then left the room, leaving Willow alone with her thoughts.

***

'It's big…really big' Buffy thought as she wandered 'round the Hyperion. 'So different form the Mansion…Well, as long as he's happy…happy with Cordelia' She still had trouble accepting that, it hurt. She remembered how back in Sunnydale, Cordelia used to hit on Angel, over and over again, even though she was with Xander then. Angel didn't notice it, and even 'if' he did, he didn't react, just ignored her. Once he lover her, Buffy, the vampire slayer. She remembered their love, and the curse… Later on, him leaving to La, comforting her when her mother had died,… He still occupied a special place in her heart, even though she was with Spike now, well not right now, but well…it wouldn't be long..they always got back together. But is wasn't really love. Spike can't really love someone, for him it's mainly about sex. 'At least with him there isn't a curse' she thought, walking on, exploring Angel's new lair. It was a pretty hotel.

'Whoa !' she yelled as she bumped up to something…cold. It was dark in the hall, but she could she a human shape, 'Angel !'

'Hey'

'You scared me !'

He chuckled. Buffy scared ? 'Exploration round ?'

'Yeah… nice place you've got here'

'Thanks..'

'Wanna talk ?'

'Euh..'

'Come on, Buffy ! It's been a while, and I know you've got questions'

Silence. She nodded. How could he always do this to her ? Breaking through her defence without really much trouble ? They entered the kitchen ; they were alone. He put a kettle on the cooking-plate, and placed a cup in front of her. 'I'll make some tea'

She smiled. It was true, she had so many questions, but didn't know where to start ; she was actually afraid of hurting him. When she'd read the e- mails, she didn't know what to expect. But what she found in LA was beyond her imagination. Angel had a son and he didn't even bothered to tell her. And now his son was gone. She'd never seen him like this, so..sad.

'How are things in Sunnydale ?' He asked, ripping her out of her thoughts, back into reality.

'Oh..good ; calm but good.'

'Glad to hear that…'

He looked at her. She looked good, very good. He could hear her heartbeat, a bit faster then usual, like she was nervous. He knew. 'She's scared to ask me' he thought. He took the kettle of the fire and served her some tea. His eye fell upon a babybottle in the closet. Connor's. He felt Buffy's eyes staring at him, and at the bottle. He heard her standing up. She placed a hand on his shoulder.

'Don't blame yourself, Angel' she said, 'It's not your fault'

'It is so, Buffy' a sigh. He went to sit down, 'I shouldn't have trusted Wesley… I should've known..' A tear welled up in his dark eyes.

'You couldn't have known' she felt sorry for him, and it hurted her deeply seeing him like this, 'We'll get him back.'

A weak smile on his face. 'If that's possible'

'Angel ! Don't give up so soon !'

'That's what Cordy said to me'

'Cordy ? Since when … Oh yeah, the couple thing…' she added for herself.

'I never thought I'd say this, but she's right !'

'She did love him too' he said.

Silence. Cordy was Connor's mother. She wasn't only Angel's new love, she was also a mother to his son. Something she'd dreamt of ; she and Angel…and a child.

The silence became uncomfortable. Buffy lifted her cup and nipped of her tea. 'Jummie ! Angel's tea still tastes good !' God, she missed that, she missed him !

Angel had dried his tears. He'd wasted enough tears lately. 'Think more positive, Angel. You've got Cordy. Loving her…And a baby on the way' he told himself, trying to make him feel better. But the baby just made him think of Connor again.

'So…how are things between you and Cordelia ?'

'What ?..oh, euh..Good, we're good'

'Angel !'

'What ?

'Good ?'

'What ? You want to hear me say that I love her ? You want to hear me say I can't go on without her ? That I love her and the baby ?'

'Baby ?…oh, you mean Connor'

'No…Cordy's pregnant'

'What ?' tears welled up in her eyes. She tried to be brave, but couldn't take it anymore. It had hurt to find out he'd had a baby, that he was together with Cordelia, Sunnydale slut. It also hurt to hear his outburst of only a couple of moments ago. But now she was pregnant ? !

'We're gonna…'

'I got that, but what ? ! You've slept with her ?' tears ran down her cheeks. No, this can't be happening. Angel looked at her and nodded.

'But you..and the curse…Angelus ?'

'Ow that ? ' he said, extremely calm.

 'Yes, that ! You're … you still have your soul, so you don't love her ? !'

'Buffy, I love her !'

'The curse ?'

'Still here'

'But you two…'

'I know, but with Connor gone…' he sighed. 'I can't reach perfect happiness.'

She swallowed. Ok, let's resume ; he loves Cordy, made love to her, didn't turn into Angelus, and now she's pregnant…Swallow again. Oh, boy ! Don't cry, Buffy, don't cry ! You're the slayer ; you're strong. She forced a weak smile ; not knowing what to say. She felt bad, hurt…and jealous. She never thought she'd ver be jealous of Cordelia Chase. Okay, Cordelia was beautiful, and back in High School the most popular girl at school, could have had any guy she wanted, and she was rich, very rich. On the other hand, her parents didn't really cared about her…she had had her mother. Her mom…God, she missed her !

'Buffy ?' Angel asked, 'Are you okay ?' He'd seen her think, and the tears who had dried ; her eyes who started to turn all puffy and red.

'Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired…I think I'm going to bed…Good night, Angel'

She left, leaving her cup on the table, still half-full.