[pic]Title: Oblivion Part 2/2
Author: Emily
Rating: PG 13, maybe a mild R.
Category: Spike/Dawn
Summary: Dawn wants oblivion.
Spoilers/Timeline: Set two years after season six. Spoilers not many, events from 'The Gift' and 'Bargaining' are the only ones specifically mentioned.
Distribution: Lil' Nibblin of course - anything of mine is Christine's , ffnet and Hot Pink if you want it. Anywhere else, just email and ask, I'm almost certain to say yes.
Disclaimer: Sadly I haven't purchased the characters in between writing part 1 and part 2 and I have not yet gained full control over the Buffyverse. World domination? Oh please, I just want the power Joss has, *g*.
Feedback: If you liked it then please drop me a line (or a review if you're reading at ffnet) and let me know pipergal33@yahoo.co.uk.
AN: This ended up a little fluffier than I'd planned but y'know, there's nothing wrong with fluff.
~**Oblivion**~
Part 2
" Spike?" Dawn said it again, staring after him, her heart throbbing hard in her chest. Her feet were finding it difficult to stay upright and Dawn vaguely realised that she must have lost more blood than the last time. Not too much though, she was still standing. And ten minutes ago too much would have been enough. She'd wanted it to have been enough. How things change, Dawn thought with the tiredness that comes from living.
Then she walked - tried to run but couldn't - out the stone door to the crypt to where Spike had gone. She stopped in her tracks because he was just standing outside the crypt. Smoking a cigarette with perfect features on perfect silhouette on the old stone.
" Spike" Dawn said his name again and he eventually turned to face her. Her gaze burned through her and Dawn felt suddenly ashamed. She didn't know of quite what but those burning eyes made her burn too. Then they lowered to look at her neck and Dawn remembered the wound there.
" Come here Nibblet" Spike said and she did, feeling a sudden surge of relief that he didn't hate her. He would still talk to her and clean whatever wounds she got inflicted on her and be tender with her. She didn't know what she would do if he didn't. Spike pushed the thick mass of dark soft hair away from her neck and examined the two neat holes in her neck, still tasting her. Spike's tongue moved in his mouth and her sweet taste was everywhere. Not just the blood but the soft brush of lips too. Hastily he looked down at the bite. It was deep and he felt a guilt for that even though she had asked for this. Deep, but it had stopped bleeding now. It'd be okay.
He reached in the pockets of his jacket and found a crumpled tissue. Spike smoothed it gently down the side of her neck. Dawn stood perfectly still and the elegant curve of her neck combined with the high intoxicating scent of her blood was almost too much for Spike. He angrily pushed the thoughts away, sure as hell hadn't counted on this happening. Spike ignored his blood lust - telling himself that it was only bloodlust even though he knew it wasn't. This was *Dawn*. Not some pointless random human to feed upon and leave for dead. This was Dawn and that was exactly why he knew it wasn't just bloodlust. He rubbed lightly at her neck with the tissue until her skin was clean of blood, two small puncture marks the only sign of what had just happened.
" Why did you kiss me?"
The words came from nowhere and then they seemed to hang there in the darkness.
Dawn said them softly, her face turned away from him and Spike turned away from her yet more. She looked at the back of his head and he walked the few quick steps back into the crypt. Dawn followed and she waited. The candlelight played flickering games across his face as she waited and then finally he looked at her.
" What does it matter" Spike said. "You want to die anyway" The words were harsh and angry and Dawn flinched at the feel of them. It matters, she thought. It matters. But dying -
" I.I don't know" Dawn spoke hesitantly.
" You don't know if you want to die?" Spike asked and all of a sudden his eyes were burning again. His eyes pure intensity burning through hers made Dawn flinch again but she didn't look away and then she nodded slowly.
There was a silence. A long and fateful silence and then he exploded.
" You don't know if you want to die. What the bloody hell have the last few months been about? You fucking begged me to kill you, you said you wanted it to end and now...now you don't know if you want to die." Spike let out a low laugh.
" What the fuck has changed, Dawn? Or was this just some idea that you got into your head and you didn't even want it? Why do you suddenly want to live?" He demanded and somehow his hands had gotten onto her shoulders and he was shaking her. Hard and angrily.
" Because you kissed me" She looked up at him with wide blue eyes that pushed back tears. He had kissed her and everything had changed. She hadn't been certain anymore.
Dawn was pale and vulnerable and so fragile there. This world was too harsh for her, Spike realised suddenly and he almost understood. Looking at her there and then Spike regretted his angry words. He regretted yelling at her and shaking her until she was trembling. That was something he noticed, Dawn was trembling. Fucking trembling. Slowly he released her.
She was an innocent, this small perfect girl woman. Such an innocent and so young to him in that moment. She must be seventeen, eighteen now he realised. They had stopped counting the days. 200 since Tara, 27 since Buffy. Numbers like that did no good and so they had stopped counting the days.
" I'm sorry, Dawn" He said. " I shouldn't have yelled at you or - "
Spike frowned and peered at her left shoulder in the half light and pushed the side of her top down and then the white strap of her bra. He saw red marks on her pale skin there from his fingers and felt the guilt all over again.
" I hurt you" Spike said softly.
Dawn shook her head. " No, it...it doesn't hurt so much"
And then he kissed her. Softly and gently and sweetly. Dawn was still trembling and so he kissed her until she stopped. Then Spike pulled away from her and she was still studying him with those clear blue eyes except the tears had gone now. Fallen away in that kiss or blinked back till they were nothing. Either way they were gone.
" You want to live?" Spike asked her and the words sounded so different than 'you want to die'. Different from 'you don't want to die' too. Dawn doesn't think she's ever heard such sweet words because she does want to live. How long she's wanted to die she doesn't know and it's been forever since she's truly wanted to live. Now she does though. Dawn nodded slowly without the fear and Spike's eyes burned without the anger.
Spike smiled then and repeated the words under his breath. Then Dawn smiled at him. Spike couldn't remember the last time Dawn had smiled.
Then he answered her question. " I love you" He said suddenly. "Why I kissed you...that's it"
Dawn was surprised and had to ask him why again. She wasn't quite clear on why he would love her after she had wanted him to kill her. Spent countless nights crying against him because she hated this place. But he does, Dawn thought and that was enough for her. After all, she had only wanted enough.
Dawn lifted her head up and kissed him. He had to wrap an arm around her waist to hold her there and he did. Dawn kissed him and in that kiss or the ones that followed she didn't long for the oblivion.
Fin.
Author: Emily
Rating: PG 13, maybe a mild R.
Category: Spike/Dawn
Summary: Dawn wants oblivion.
Spoilers/Timeline: Set two years after season six. Spoilers not many, events from 'The Gift' and 'Bargaining' are the only ones specifically mentioned.
Distribution: Lil' Nibblin of course - anything of mine is Christine's , ffnet and Hot Pink if you want it. Anywhere else, just email and ask, I'm almost certain to say yes.
Disclaimer: Sadly I haven't purchased the characters in between writing part 1 and part 2 and I have not yet gained full control over the Buffyverse. World domination? Oh please, I just want the power Joss has, *g*.
Feedback: If you liked it then please drop me a line (or a review if you're reading at ffnet) and let me know pipergal33@yahoo.co.uk.
AN: This ended up a little fluffier than I'd planned but y'know, there's nothing wrong with fluff.
~**Oblivion**~
Part 2
" Spike?" Dawn said it again, staring after him, her heart throbbing hard in her chest. Her feet were finding it difficult to stay upright and Dawn vaguely realised that she must have lost more blood than the last time. Not too much though, she was still standing. And ten minutes ago too much would have been enough. She'd wanted it to have been enough. How things change, Dawn thought with the tiredness that comes from living.
Then she walked - tried to run but couldn't - out the stone door to the crypt to where Spike had gone. She stopped in her tracks because he was just standing outside the crypt. Smoking a cigarette with perfect features on perfect silhouette on the old stone.
" Spike" Dawn said his name again and he eventually turned to face her. Her gaze burned through her and Dawn felt suddenly ashamed. She didn't know of quite what but those burning eyes made her burn too. Then they lowered to look at her neck and Dawn remembered the wound there.
" Come here Nibblet" Spike said and she did, feeling a sudden surge of relief that he didn't hate her. He would still talk to her and clean whatever wounds she got inflicted on her and be tender with her. She didn't know what she would do if he didn't. Spike pushed the thick mass of dark soft hair away from her neck and examined the two neat holes in her neck, still tasting her. Spike's tongue moved in his mouth and her sweet taste was everywhere. Not just the blood but the soft brush of lips too. Hastily he looked down at the bite. It was deep and he felt a guilt for that even though she had asked for this. Deep, but it had stopped bleeding now. It'd be okay.
He reached in the pockets of his jacket and found a crumpled tissue. Spike smoothed it gently down the side of her neck. Dawn stood perfectly still and the elegant curve of her neck combined with the high intoxicating scent of her blood was almost too much for Spike. He angrily pushed the thoughts away, sure as hell hadn't counted on this happening. Spike ignored his blood lust - telling himself that it was only bloodlust even though he knew it wasn't. This was *Dawn*. Not some pointless random human to feed upon and leave for dead. This was Dawn and that was exactly why he knew it wasn't just bloodlust. He rubbed lightly at her neck with the tissue until her skin was clean of blood, two small puncture marks the only sign of what had just happened.
" Why did you kiss me?"
The words came from nowhere and then they seemed to hang there in the darkness.
Dawn said them softly, her face turned away from him and Spike turned away from her yet more. She looked at the back of his head and he walked the few quick steps back into the crypt. Dawn followed and she waited. The candlelight played flickering games across his face as she waited and then finally he looked at her.
" What does it matter" Spike said. "You want to die anyway" The words were harsh and angry and Dawn flinched at the feel of them. It matters, she thought. It matters. But dying -
" I.I don't know" Dawn spoke hesitantly.
" You don't know if you want to die?" Spike asked and all of a sudden his eyes were burning again. His eyes pure intensity burning through hers made Dawn flinch again but she didn't look away and then she nodded slowly.
There was a silence. A long and fateful silence and then he exploded.
" You don't know if you want to die. What the bloody hell have the last few months been about? You fucking begged me to kill you, you said you wanted it to end and now...now you don't know if you want to die." Spike let out a low laugh.
" What the fuck has changed, Dawn? Or was this just some idea that you got into your head and you didn't even want it? Why do you suddenly want to live?" He demanded and somehow his hands had gotten onto her shoulders and he was shaking her. Hard and angrily.
" Because you kissed me" She looked up at him with wide blue eyes that pushed back tears. He had kissed her and everything had changed. She hadn't been certain anymore.
Dawn was pale and vulnerable and so fragile there. This world was too harsh for her, Spike realised suddenly and he almost understood. Looking at her there and then Spike regretted his angry words. He regretted yelling at her and shaking her until she was trembling. That was something he noticed, Dawn was trembling. Fucking trembling. Slowly he released her.
She was an innocent, this small perfect girl woman. Such an innocent and so young to him in that moment. She must be seventeen, eighteen now he realised. They had stopped counting the days. 200 since Tara, 27 since Buffy. Numbers like that did no good and so they had stopped counting the days.
" I'm sorry, Dawn" He said. " I shouldn't have yelled at you or - "
Spike frowned and peered at her left shoulder in the half light and pushed the side of her top down and then the white strap of her bra. He saw red marks on her pale skin there from his fingers and felt the guilt all over again.
" I hurt you" Spike said softly.
Dawn shook her head. " No, it...it doesn't hurt so much"
And then he kissed her. Softly and gently and sweetly. Dawn was still trembling and so he kissed her until she stopped. Then Spike pulled away from her and she was still studying him with those clear blue eyes except the tears had gone now. Fallen away in that kiss or blinked back till they were nothing. Either way they were gone.
" You want to live?" Spike asked her and the words sounded so different than 'you want to die'. Different from 'you don't want to die' too. Dawn doesn't think she's ever heard such sweet words because she does want to live. How long she's wanted to die she doesn't know and it's been forever since she's truly wanted to live. Now she does though. Dawn nodded slowly without the fear and Spike's eyes burned without the anger.
Spike smiled then and repeated the words under his breath. Then Dawn smiled at him. Spike couldn't remember the last time Dawn had smiled.
Then he answered her question. " I love you" He said suddenly. "Why I kissed you...that's it"
Dawn was surprised and had to ask him why again. She wasn't quite clear on why he would love her after she had wanted him to kill her. Spent countless nights crying against him because she hated this place. But he does, Dawn thought and that was enough for her. After all, she had only wanted enough.
Dawn lifted her head up and kissed him. He had to wrap an arm around her waist to hold her there and he did. Dawn kissed him and in that kiss or the ones that followed she didn't long for the oblivion.
Fin.