Alys' Mysterious Cabinet
Setting: Alys' house
ALYS: Hey, now wait a minute! WHY do you THINK it's called mysterious?
HAHN: But everyone wants to know what's in it!
CHAZ: Don't you remember Chaz saying "This cabinet contains Alys' most personal belongings"? That's what's in there!
KYRA: We know that, but WHAT are the personal belongings?
ALYS: Yeesh! Like I'm telling you.
RUNE: Well I will.
ALYS: You know what Rune? You're so dead. That's it! No more cheesecake for you! I'll tell the Nara Cake Shop or whatever it's called to stop serving you!
RUNE: Well, you know how to twist a guy's arm.......but that still won't stop me.
ALYS: Ahhhghhh!!!!!
GRYZ: Yeah, yeah so what's in it?
(Alys then leaves the room, shouting and covering her ears.)
RUNE: Well for one thing, pictures of me.
RIKA: Why would she have pictures of you? Oh yeah.....what's you're relationship with her anyway?
ALYS: THAT WILL NOT BE DISCLOSED!!!!!!
RUNE: When did you get back?
RAJA: What's the big deal anyway?
ALYS: Look old fart, it's a big deal 'cause it's nobody's business!
CHAZ: Oooooh....scandalous!
ALYS: Chaz....DIDN'T I SAY PRACTICE YOUR SWING?????!!!!!!!
CHAZ: But Alys, we want to know.......!
ALYS: You still have to practice. Anyway, whatever Rune says isn't true.
DEMI: Demi, Wren! Don't you guys want to know?
WREN: Frankly, no.
DEMI: It's none of our business.
KYRA: So tell us Rune....don't keep us in the dark.
RUNE: Did you know that Alys always had a crush on me?
ALYS: WhatEVER!!!! You could only wish. You're just saying that because people used to mistaken you for a girl! So, you're EGO got in the way and I don't like you. Why do you think I avoid you?!
RUNE: Oh, please Alys. You claim to avoid me because of some cologne that I happen to wear.
RIKA: But you don't wear cologne.
RUNE: Exactly.
ALYS: You need to.
RUNE: Hey! I know, it's just your love for me that's talking.
KYRA: How....interesting Alys! What are you avoiding?
ALYS: I thought we were talking about my cabinet.
HAHN: She's not telling anything. So what else is in there?
RUNE: Orthopedic shoes, cookbooks, love letters to herself.....
ALYS: I never wrote love letters to myself! Those were YOUR love letters. Rune always liked ME. I turned him down because he looks too feminine.
RIKA: Really? This story gets harder and harder to believe.
ALYS: That's why it's MYSTERIOUS. Now say it with me....Mis-tee-ree-us. Good.
GRYZ: Orthopedic shoes?
ALYS: NO! I DON'T HAVE ANY!!!!
RUNE: Ha! Calm down. You do have cookbooks though.
CHAZ: You said cooking was natural talent!
ALYS: It IS. Those were Rune's cookbooks. He can't even boil water.
DEMIl It seems that a lot of stuff in there is Rune's.
WREN: I thought you weren't getting in this Demi.
DEMI: I'm not. Just wondering.
RUNE: Did you ever hear Alys' first poems?
CHAZ: How do they go?
RUNE: Gets hot in summer
Let's go to the beach
Gee, what a bummer....
Hey! Look at the leach!
KYRA: A leach?
RIKA: At the beach?
CHAZ: And that's a bummer?
ALYS: Awww, I was like six when I wrote that. I have better poetry now scumbag!
The petal falls to the floor
It signifies who's at the door
I look and turn around
And look, it's Rune on the ground
DEAD.
RAJA: Huh? That's better?
ALYS: It isn't when you're name is RUNE.
GRYZ: Something tells me this isn't good.
RUNE: Thanks for noticing the obvious. Alys you couldn't kill me.....*sweet talk*
ALYS: That's not going to work today Rune.
KYRA: It worked other times?
ALYS: Tch, NO!
CHAZ: Boy, I guess we'll never know what exactly is in Alys' cabinet.
ALYS: Nope.
RUNE: Oh, you'll know....I made keys for everyone!
CHAZ: All right!
ALYS: Gee, that would be clever if you made the correct key for the correct cabinet. Those are keys to my cabinet in my room...which has nothing in it.
RUNE: Who says it doesn't?
RIKA: What's in there?
RUNE: Orthopedic underwear.
ALYS: Don't listen to him!
RUNE: Believe me, it's something that you don't want to see!
GRYZ: Damn, that's bad.
RUNE: Exactly.
ALYS: Ooooh…..
KYRA: Wait! You actually saw them?
RUNE: Yeah. Scariest thing ever.
(Alys begins to bash Rune upon the head repeatedly with Chaz' ugly sandworm statue)
RUNE: Ow! Help me! Ow!
DEMI: Alys' condition has taken a turn for the worse!
WREN: Let's just leave them alone.
CHAZ: Yeah! So they can bond!
KYRA: You call that bonding?
Hmm…Maybe I'll write more sometime…Who knows?