Disclaimer:  I own nothing…all characters are property of Joss Whedon, etc.

Summary:  Willow and Spike deal with the repercussions of the kiss.  Xander takes drastic measures.

Author's Note:  I played around just a little with Angel and Spike's history.  It was the only way I could make it work with the story.

Chapter 6

            Willow bit her lip and glanced over at Spike who was stretched out on the sofa.  He was reading Catcher in the Rye and there was a pair of wire frame glasses perched on his nose.  It had been two long days since Angel had been in town.  Since that time he'd barely spoken to her, let alone touched her.  It was driving her crazy.  She had to get him to talk.

            "Spike?"

            He didn't look up from his book.  "Willow."

            "I want to talk to you."

            He sighed, knowing exactly what she wanted to talk to him about.  Ever since Angel had been in town he had avoided the topic, avoided her, as best he could considering he lived with her.  "I'm not going to discuss anything that happened with you Willow.  Leave it be."

            "Spike, I know that you don't want to talk about it but it might…"

            He threw down his book and took off his glasses.  "Just bloody well leave it alone.  I'm not going to talk to you about this!"

            "Oh yes you are!" she yelled back.  "You can't keep it bottled up forever!  I thought we weren't going to keep anything from each other!"

            "What do you want me to say, Willow?  That Angelus made me for him?  That I loved him so much I nearly died from grief when he abandoned us?  That when he kissed me the other night I was ready to beg him to come inside just so I could have one memory of him loving me to carry forever?  Would you like to hear about how when he lost his soul and became Angelus again he beat me, physically and emotionally?  Did you want to know that I didn't care because any attention from him was better than none at all, because I loved him!  He brutalized me and I still loved him!  I'll hate him until he turns to dust, but I'll always love him more!"  He was screaming and tears were running down his cheeks.  It was taking every ounce of courage in her not to run from the room at the look of anger on his face and the pain filled words spewing out of his mouth.

            "Spike, I'm…"

            "Don't say your sorry!  Don't you bloody say it!"

            She ignored him and kept going.  "I'm sorry that I said he could kiss you.  I'm sorry that it brought up all these old feelings for you.  I love you and I just want you to be happy.  I know I make you happy and I know you love me, but despite what you say I don't complete you.  Part of you will always belong to him."  She sighed when she saw that he was calming down.  Tears still fell from his eyes, but his anger was fading, and he sort of collapsed back onto the sofa.

            "You do complete me.  I don't need anyone else," he whispered, denying her words and the truth behind them.

             "Maybe not now.  But one day you will.  One day, you two will be all that's left of us and you'll find that you need each other more than either of you realize."

            He wiped at the tears that dripped down his cheeks, unable to believe that he'd been reduced to crying.  It hurt to think that she might be right, that he did need Angel.  Maybe not every day but there was some part of him, some base instinct that would always draw him to his sire.  That bond would always be there no matter what they did to each other.  But right at the moment it hurt even more to think that one day Willow would be gone from his life, taking all her beauty, fire, and passion with her.

            "Are you okay?" she asked, from where she still sat in the chair.

            "Yeah.  Can't believe I started bawlin' like a bleedin' baby."  He looked up at her and silently she rose, knowing that he wanted to hold her without him having to say a word.  She straddled his lap on her knees, wrapping her arms around his neck, cradling his head against her shoulder.

            "It's okay, you know," she said when he finally relaxed against her.  He stiffened and tried to pull away but she just held tight and soon he relaxed again.  "After you left, he said that he knew you loved me, probably more than you ever loved anyone, even him.  And I told him that you can't love one person more or less than someone else.  You can only love them differently.  I loved Oz but in a different way than I love you.  It's always different."

            "He knew?" he asked in a whisper that came out so sad she began to cry.

            "He knew.  He also said that his biggest regret was never letting you know that he felt the same way.  From the first time he saw you that was it for him."  She smiled softly.  "I know how he feels."

            Spike laughed, a hoarse tear-filled laugh.  "You must think I'm sick."

            "No.  I think you're a vampire that has lived for a hundred and twenty six years.  Anyone who lives that long is bound to rack up some interesting experiences…and loves."

            "I've loved exactly three people."

            "Can you really count Dru though?  I mean, she was a little nuts and you were like her nurse."

            "With Dru it was different.  After Angelus left I just wanted someone…anyone to love me.  For some reason I thought she could offer me that.  Somewhere in the back of my head, though, I knew she couldn't, I just didn't want to admit it to myself.  I did love her, but not like I love you.  With you it's real because you can love me back.  Dru doesn't understand love.  She can't."

            "So are we okay?" she asked hesitantly.

            He smiled and kissed her softly.  "We're good.  But don't go telling Peaches he can kiss me again."

            "Okay."  She paused uncertain if she should continue, finally deciding that it was best to get everything out in the open.  "I think should  know that I wouldn't object if you wanted to…re-establish…the claim."

            He stared at her, stunned.  "What does my little witch know about vampire claims?  And how in the bloody hell did you know Angelus and I claimed each other?"

            "Well, you told me that you and Angel used to be…intimate and I understood that.  But I wanted to know more about you and him so I looked in the Watcher Diaries and other books that are in Giles' locked cabinet." 

            Spike smirked.  She was so mischievous sometimes and curious as a cat.  "I was going to tell you when I thought you might be ready.  I want you to be sure before you agree to it.  Claiming is done for life.  You can have other lovers, but you'll always belong to the one you are mated to, and you would feel a bond with anyone that your mate may have been claimed by before you.  You would feel the bond with Angel, but it wouldn't be as strong because your bond to him would be through me."

            "Would it bind me to anyone besides you and him?"

            "No.  Neither Peaches or I ever made Dru our mate.  Dru was too crazy.  Darla never claimed Angelus either.  She never was big on rituals and the claiming ritual is intense.  It was just the two of us."

            Willow couldn't help but smile at that.  He was so certain that Angel hated him, yet Angelus never claimed anyone else.  She thought of the brooding vampire and how he would feel if she could restore his relationship with Spike.  But there was also Angel's soul and Buffy to consider.  Morrigan could make Angel's soul permanent.  It was something they'd been researching.  Would he choose Spike or go back to Buffy?  And if he chose Spike it would give her a small bond to him when Spike claimed her.  Despite the fact that she was moving on, Buffy might have trouble accepting that.  "I'm going to need time to think about it.  There's so many people to consider."

            "Take all the time you need."

            "As for how I knew about you and Angel, there were nearly three pages describing the claiming ritual between you.  How did the watchers find out something like that?" 

            "I'd like to know the answer to that as well, luv."

Willow sighed and rested against him.  "You know we have to go see Giles tomorrow?"

            "I know, luv.  I'm not looking forward to it, but if it helps keep you in your friends' good graces then I'll do it.  I'll ask him about the Diaries then."

            Willow just nodded, not really comprehending what he said.  "I love you, Spike," she whispered, her eyes beginning to drift shut.  Just before the blackness of slumber engulfed her she heard him whisper, "Love you too."

            "You're breaking up with me?!" Xander yelled.  They were in the training room at the Magic Box and had just finished inventory. 

            "Yes, Xander.  I'm breaking up with you."

            "Why?"

            "If you must know you haven't been around at all lately.  All you do is worry about Willow and wonder what you can do to get rid of Spike and get her back to normal.  Well here's some truth for you Xander.  She's not going to change back.  She likes who she is and she loves Spike.  The rest of us have accepted it.  Hell, we all like her better now.  But I don't want to be with someone who spends all his time looking to destroy his best friend's life, even if he's claiming to do it out of the best of intentions.  Plus, half the time I don't think you even really like me.  You cut me off when I talk.  You tell me to be quiet or constantly act embarrassed by me because I say the wrong thing.  Well I'm sorry, Xander, but I'd like to see you try to adapt to being human again after nearly eleven hundred years as a demon.  It's pretty damn hard to go from having immense power to being normal."

            "But An…"

            "No, Xander.  There's no discussing this.  I'm a human.  I have free will.  And I choose to exercise it by saying that we're through."

            Everything was going so wrong.  Angel didn't dust Spike like he said he would, Willow and Spike were acting even more lovey-dovey than ever, and now Anya was breaking up with him.  All the anger and frustration burst out of him, spewing forth in a torrent of hurtful words.  "You know what?  You're right.  I never really did like you.  You were just a fine piece of ass in the right place at the right time.  After Cordy dumped me you were just a convenient lay.  As for Spike, well, I'm taking care of that."

            "That was mean, Xander.  I didn't want to hurt you.  But you won't let me be me.  I need someone who will.  Please leave Willow and Spike alone.  They're happy and he's behaving.  Stop this before someone really gets hurt."

            "Sorry Anya.  You don't get to make requests like that anymore.  You just dumped me.  Remember?"  He turned and stormed out the back entrance, leaving Anya standing there shocked. 

            For a Tuesday night Willy's was pretty crowded.  Normally Xander never would have gone in without Buffy but tonight he didn't care.  The demons cleared a path for him, feeling the anger rolling off of him in huge waves. 

            He walked straight up to the bar and grabbed Willy by the front of his shirt.  "I need a name."

            Willy went wide-eyed, recognizing one of the Slayer's friends.  Only he looked out of control.  There was a look in his eyes that Willy's only seen a few times before.  Something pushed the kid over the edge and he wanted payback.  "Sure man.  Willy's always willing to help a friend of the Slayer's.  Just tell me what you want and I'll get it."

            "I need an assassin.  Not some amateur, but a good one.  Someone to take out a master vamp."

            Willy thought fast, knowing that he was on borrowed time with this kid who was like a bomb just waiting for the fuse to be lit.  "I got it!  I know a girl, she's the best there is.  Goes by the name Nemesis.  Has somethin' to do with Greek myth.  She uses a bow and arrow to kill her targets."

            "Perfect.  How do I find her?"

            "You don't.  She finds you.  I can give her a message.  She picks them up here every day."

            "You do that.  You tell her tomorrow, eight o'clock, Shady Rest Cemetary.  South gate."  He released his hold on Willy and walked out the door.

            "Man someone pissed that kid off.  I'd hate to be on his bad side right now," he muttered as he went back to serving drinks to demons.

            Spike sat inside the Watcher's office at the Magic Box waiting for the man to say something.  After several minutes he couldn't take it anymore.  "Sod it all, if you aren't going to say something I'm going to go."

            "Well, there's not really much I can say is there.  It's not like you would leave Willow alone if I asked you to."

            "I wouldn't do that for all the money in the world.  Certainly wouldn't do it for you."

            "So you see, I'm at a loss as to how to go about this.  Originally I was going to threaten you but then I realized that would be useless.  You're still a vampire without a soul."

            "Damn straight."

            "So I decided to call you here to tell you that I accept your relationship with Willow, though I would prefer never to hear intimate details…again."  He paused to wipe his glasses.  "I also want to say that I'm glad she finally came into her own.  She loves you."  His voice got dangerously low and traces of Ripper came to the fore.  "So by God if you ever hurt her in any way I will make sure that you suffer the most horrifying, unending torture I can devise.  I will make it last for years, bloodying you up until I either get tired or bored, whichever comes first.  Then I'll kill you."

            Spike just stared at the Watcher.  Then he smiled.  "Bloody hell that was a good show.  I never knew you had it in you watcher.  You've been holding out on us.  Where did you learn that?"

            Spike's excitement over his threat was contagious.  "Yes, well, people are not always what they appear."

            "I'll say.  That was great.  Even startled me.  If I'd been expectin' it though…"

            "Of course," Giles readily agreed, not wanting to strike a blow to Spike's ego.

            "By the way, Red mentioned something to me about some pages she read in the Watcher Diaries."

            "How did…" he began but stopped when realization struck.  "She went into my locked cabinet didn't she?"  Spike nodded, smirking.  "Well, what did she tell you?"

            "She read about the claiming ritual between Angelus and I.  I want to know how it ended up in there.  That was completely private.  For Christ's sake, we were in the middle of nowhere when we did it.  Besides, aren't those diaries supposed to be about the slayers?"

            "The diaries are about the slayers.  But they are also about the demons and vampires that each slayer faces.  Some vampires and demons are tracked more than others.  When did you perform the ritual?"

            "Not long before Peaches got all soul happy."

            "That explains it.  You're lives were being recorded because the slayer at the time was following you.  That gypsy girl that Angel killed was the slayer.  Of course he knew that.  He caught her at a moment when she was weak from fighting off a large group of vampires.  Nearly thirty according to the diaries.  Angel just walked right up behind her and drank."

            "He never told me he killed a slayer."

            "I don't imagine he would have.  He was cursed just hours later."

            "Do they know?"

            "No and I'd prefer to keep it that way.  It would destroy Buffy."  Giles took a deep breath before asking his next question, knowing very well it could anger Spike.  "Do you still love him?"

            Spike just tilted his head as if trying to get inside Giles' mind, his crystal blue eyes filled with a century of knowledge.  "I always have.  But in no way does that mean that I love Willow any less."  Giles nodded, satisfied with the knowledge that Spike was telling him the truth.  "Can I go?"

            "Yes."

            "You don't want to speak to both of us?"

            "I don't think that's necessary.  You passed."

            "I wasn't aware I was being tested."

            "I know," Giles said, smiling.

            Spike smirked at him and walked out the door.  'The Watcher is certainly more than he appears to be,' he thought as Willow placed her hand in his and they walked out of the store.

            Xander paced back and forth in front of the south gate of Shady Rest.  It was two minutes until eight and he couldn't see anyone coming from any direction.  He spun on his heel about to make another lap, only to come face to face with a young girl.

            She looked no more than seventeen but if anyone ever asked she could easily tell them she was over five hundred years old.  Her hair was thick and raven black.  It fell in soft, layered waves down to her waist.  She was tall, almost as tall as Angel, and had these mesmerizing golden eyes.  She was wearing a simple outfit consisting of black leather pants and a ribbed black turtleneck sweater.  A brown leather pouch was strapped to her back and he could see the ends of arrows protruding from it.  Her bow rested on her shoulder.  When she spoke it was with a low, husky voice that eerily reminded him of Faith.  "I was told you wish to see me."

            "Uh…yeah," Xander said, not sure how to respond to her.  Her presence was overpowering.  She carried this aura of power and self-control.  Like she could kill in a split second if she needed to.  "I want to hire you," he continued, refusing to let his fear get the best of him.

            "Can you afford me?"

            Xander pulled out a stack of bills.  There must have been at least two thousand dollars there.  "Two thousand to kill a master vampire."

            "Five thousand is my minimum price."

            "Three thousand," he said pulling another thousand out of his pocket.

            "Four."

            "Three thousand, five hundred.  And not a penny more."

            She held out her hand, and he shook it.  "Deal," they both said.

            "So who do you want dead?" she asked.

            "There's a vampire, a master.  He goes by the name Spike.  I want him turned to dust.  I don't care how and I don't care when as long as it's not too long.  He has bleach blond hair, speaks with a British accent, and wears black the majority of the time."

            "I am familiar with him.  William the Bloody has quite a history."

            He wasn't expecting that.  "Oh.  Okay." He pulled out half of the money and handed it to her.  "You'll get the other half when he's dust."

            "I'll be seeing you soon then." 

            "I hope so."  She turned and walked away, fading back into the dark shadows that she came from.

            Xander began to whistle a jaunty tune as he headed home, anticipating Spike's demise.