Buffy's POV
"Faith?" She looks up at me but doesn't say anything. "I... I'm sorry..." I trail off because I'm not exactly sure what I'm sorry for, and I know I need to figure it out before saying more.
She doesn't say anything, just goes back to staring at her hands clasped in her lap.
I am such a selfish asshole. Somehow I thought she would jump right into this. Just because she realized she has feelings for me doesn't mean she wants to do anything about them.
"Whatever happens next - is up to you."
Her brow furrows, but she stays silent.
"After what happened last night - I decided to stop questioning how I feel. I..." I close my eyes for a second and take a calming breath. "You are the most important person in my life, Faith."
That gets her to look up at me, but I can't read her expression.
"I have feelings for you. Big ones. Ones that I realized are not at all new." I expect her to have some kind of reaction, but she's just staring at me. "I would very much like to explore those feelings with you, but I understand if you aren't ready for that or don't even want it."
I think she's finally going to say something, but she still doesn't. I'm doing my best not to spiral out, but it's getting harder the longer she doesn't respond.
"And... no matter what you decide - I don't want to lose you as a friend. I can't lose you." I say, and she finally smiles a little.
"You won't ever lose me, B." I can see she's trying to hold back tears. I'm not managing that quite as well as she is. "Let's go for a ride."
She's up the stairs and into her room before I can register what that means. I quickly follow and throw on some jeans and a t-shirt.
Digging around in my closet, I find a pair of boots that will be perfect. I have no idea where they came from. I certainly never would have bought anything like them.
In just a few minutes, I'm ready and open my door to find Faith standing there. She's clad in tight jeans and an even tighter tank top.
"Gulp," I say as I look her up and down.
"Did you just say gulp out loud?" She laughs, and oh my god, do I love the sound of her laugh.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
She grins at me and does her own look-over of me. When her eyes land on the boots, all her happiness vanishes, and she sighs before turning down the hallway.
"Shit." I hiss as I remember where the boots came from.
Three years ago - my birthday
"What is this?" I say with complete derision as I hold up a heavy leather boot with just two fingers.
"Motorcycle boots." Faith says. She's standing by the door with her hands tucked into her pockets. I can tell how nervous she is, and I grimace.
I have no idea why Faith got me a present or why she's even here. I've told her countless times that I hate her living with us. I've considered calling the police on her a few times, but even I'm not that mean.
OK, maybe I am that mean, but I don't think Dawn would ever forgive me.
"You know - in case you ever want to go for a ride." She sounds nervous but hopeful. I can't resist digging at her.
"A ride!" I chuckle cruelly. "As if I'd ever ride a motorcycle with you." I put as much venom into my voice as possible - making sure she knows it's her that is the problem and not the motorcycle.
"Why do you have to be such a bitch all the time?" Dawn asks, and I scoff at her. I was so focussed on Faith that I forgot Dawn was still in the room.
"Me? I'm the bitch? She shouldn't even be here!" I'm more than a little annoyed that Dawn is sticking up for Faith. I died for her. You'd think she'd be on my side once in a while. "Has everyone forgotten that she's a murderer who should be in jail?"
"No one has forgotten anything, B." Faith says and walks out the front door.
I grin with satisfaction that I was able to get her to leave.
Present Day
"Faith!" I run down the stairs as soon as I hear the door shut. She was standing on the front porch with her arms folded over her chest.
I'm surprised she didn't just leave without me.
"I'm so sorry - I forgot..."
"Don't sweat it, B." She drops her arms and heads toward the bike without looking back. I'm not sure if I should follow. "Well?"
She's not looking at me, but she does seem to be waiting for me to climb on. I want to say something else, but I have no idea what I can say.
I already apologized, but it doesn't seem like nearly enough. How many more times is this going to happen? I was mean to her almost every time we interacted these past few years. Even before that - it's not like I was great to her. I never gave her any kind of a chance.
How can I ever make that up to her?
Maybe this is stupid - I should just leave her alone. She should go to Cleveland and get to escape me and all our awful memories.
I almost tell her that, but I change my mind. It's not my choice to make. She stayed all this time for a reason. I'm the one that made all the decisions in our relationship before - now it's her turn.
I've told her how I feel. Now she has to decide what she wants to do with that.
I'll be devastated if she decides to leave, but I'll find a way to understand. She deserves to be happy.
Faith's POV
Fuck. I sit on the bike and pretend to look over the instrument panel while she decides what she will do, and I try to remember how to breathe.
Of course, she forgot about the boots - why the hell wouldn't she? I'm still not even sure what I was thinking when I got them for her.
I have no idea how this is going to work. How can we be friends after everything we've done to each other? Maybe I really should just take off.
It's not doing either of us any good to keep remembering how shitty we've been to each other. I'm probably delusional to think we can just move forward.
I think I at least understand why things were so hard for me when I first met her. I was so desperate for B's attention that I lost my mind.
I'm jolted out of my thoughts when B climbs on the back. She's not holding on to me like she did last night, which is probably a good thing.
Deciding I'm just gonna enjoy this new bike and save worrying about B for later, I shift into gear and head out onto the street.
This bike is incredible, and I am going maybe a little too fast as I put it through its paces. I never imagined I'd get a chance to ride something like this. I might have to apologize to Red for being so harsh last night.
The road has straightened out, and it's now that I notice B is clinging to me, and even with the vibrations of the bike, I can feel how hard she's shaking.
I carefully bring the bike to a stop and turn it off.
"You OK?" I ask, but she doesn't respond. I can't even get off the bike with the way she's wrapped around me. "I'm really sorry about that - I didn't do it on purpose."
Her arms drop from around my waist, and I slide off. Now her arms are wrapped around her midsection, and she's just staring at the ground. It doesn't seem like she's moving any time soon, so I pick her up and carry her to the edge of the woods.
We sit next to each other in silence for a few minutes while I try to figure out what to say, hoping that she'll say something first.
"I didn't mean to do that." I'm sure it sounds like total bullshit, but I honestly wasn't trying to mess with her.
"I know. It's OK." She sounds kinda broken, and I have to figure out how to fix it. I can't let my carelessness ruin everything we've been building.
I force her to look at me. "I mean it, B. I wasn't trying to scare you. I've just never ridden a bike that powerful, and I let it get away from me."
I wipe off a tear trailing down her cheek and smile in relief when she leans into my hand. She's still not saying anything, but she does seem to be relaxing.
"I promise you that I will never intentionally try to hurt you." I seriously hope she believes me. "We've both done so many things to hurt the other. If there's any chance..." I pause here because I'm not ready to consider where our relationship might be going. "We just have to trust that we're done hurting each other."
She smiles more at that and places her hand over mine. "OK."
"OK," I agree and sit next to her. She didn't let go of my hand when I shifted, and our joined hands are resting on the ground between us.
It's actually really nice sitting here with her. It reminds me of how things were when we first met. It seemed like we were always touching in one way or another - until I fucked everything all up.
My stomach thankfully starts making noises before I can fall too deeply into the nightmare of my memories. We left before I could eat anything this morning.
I'm surprised when she giggles at me and stands up, pulling me to my feet. We're not that far from home. It'll probably only take fifteen minutes to get back if I convince her to run.
"Are you sure?" I ask when she leads me to the bike and motions for me to get on.
"I'm sure. I trust you." She says, and my heart pounds in my chest. This time she wraps her arms around me and leans her body into mine. "I'll be holding on tight this time."
"Gulp," I say like she did early, and she laughs. It feels incredible to have her body pressed into mine like this. I hope I didn't ruin everything and I'll be able to convince her to ride with me again.
We're almost back to the house when she completely tenses behind me. It happened so fast that I almost started to lose control of the bike. I think I corrected fast enough that she didn't notice.
I spot a figure on our porch, and now I understand why she's freaking out. I stop a few houses down and wait for her to climb off.
"I'll see what he wants." Nodding, she sits down on the sidewalk and wraps her arms around her knees. I cannot believe he has the nerve to just show up at our house like this.
I hate that he still has this effect on her.
"Faith." He says when I pull the bike into the driveway and shut it off.
"What are you doing here?" My fists are clenched at my side, and I can barely force myself to talk to him. I am trying to be nice because I want to get this over with as fast as possible.
"We should talk inside." He motions to the door, and I shake my head.
"We can talk here." There is no way in hell I'm letting him in our house.
"It might not be safe." He looks around nervously.
"It's definitely not safe for you," I say, and I think he didn't even notice till now how pissed off I am.
"Yes, well." He adjusts his glasses and shifts from side to side.
"Say what you came here to say, now."
"I heard what you said to Willow. I do not think that was at all appropriate or fair to attack her like that."
"GO!" I shout and take a step towards him. "Right fucking now."
B is by my side and holding me back. I don't know for sure, but I think she just saved his life.
Buffy's POV
"Faith, it's OK. Come on." I push her to the garage's side door and sit her down at the workbench.
"It's not OK, B. None of them care at all…"
"Shhh." I press my finger to her lips, and she freezes. "Believe me - I love that you are defending my honor. But I think we need to know why he came here."
"Fine." She scowls and crosses her arms over her chest.
"I'll be right back." I'm tempted to kiss her so that she knows I'm on her side. I'm not sure that we're there yet, or if we'll ever be.
Giles is still on the porch, but his back is to me, and he's on the phone. I decided to eavesdrop, hoping to learn more about why he's here without actually talking to him.
"I don't know." He sighs. "I may have said I didn't think she treated you fairly, and she ran off."
I chuckle as I can hear Willow yelling at him from here.
"Yes, well. It may not have been the best way to start the conversation." He says, and I can't help the visceral reaction to hear him admit fault. Even though that wasn't much of an apology - it was more than he ever gave me.
I've run out of patience, and I clear my throat. He looks startled to see me standing there and almost drops his phone.
"Buffy is here. I will let you know when there is an update." He slides his phone into his pocket and stares at me.
"Buffy… how are you?"
I chuckle. "Please don't. Just tell me why you are here."
"Faith needs to hear this as well."
"She can hear you fine."
He looks like he wants to argue but thankfully opts not to. "I came to bring Faith to Cleveland." He says this so casually as if there isn't any kind of doubt that Faith would go with him.
"What? Why?"
"Because we figured out what Angel was up to, and it's not safe for her here." He's looking at me hard as if he's blaming me for the lack of safety.
I can't help but wonder if he's right. I shake that thought away. I might not be in peak fighting form, but I know no one will defend Faith the way I can.
"Angel is gone. Why isn't she safe here?" I force myself to wait for more information before taking any action.
"We believe he was working with others who still intend to capture Faith and use her to unmake all the new slayers."
"How could anyone possibly do that?" He's squirming in front of me, and I just know he's about to tell me something I really don't want to hear.
"Several items were stolen from the Slayer compound in recent weeks. Based on what we found in that warehouse and the missing items, it's the only thing that makes sense."
"What missing items?" I asked through clenched teeth. When we split off after destroying Sunnydale, there was something they convinced me belonged with them. Letting them take it was a struggle, and now I deeply regret it.
"Books mostly, a few other sundry items." He's standing here telling me items he is responsible for were stolen and somehow still sounding completely arrogant.
I'm moving before I can even think about it, shocked when I realize Faith is holding me back. I don't try to fight her, but I let her keep her arms around me - it's the only thing preventing me from wailing on him.
"They took the Scythe." He says in a small voice filled with shame.
"Do you think she's safer with you when you can't even hold on to the most important slayer weapon?" I say this through clenched teeth with my fists balled at my side. Faith's presence kept me calm, but it's not working anymore.
He opens and closes his mouth a few times, and I at least have the satisfaction of shutting him up.
"You've delivered your message - now leave." Faith says, still standing between us.
"It's better if you come with me now. We would have sent a team, but we don't know who is involved." He says and glances at me as if somehow I could be part of whatever this is.
Before I realized what's happened - Faith was no longer between us, and she's stalking toward Giles.
"Leave." Faith grabbed Giles by his suit coat and dragged him towards his car.
I think he finally gets the point now. He scrambles into his car and quickly drives away. Faith is staring down the road as if she thinks he's going to turn around at any moment.
I walk carefully toward her, not wanting any of her rage to spill over onto me. "Let's get inside."
She softens as soon as she realizes I'm standing next to her and takes my hand.
We move into the house and enter the kitchen. She still hasn't eaten. I heat up some leftover pizza for her, and she eats it without any awareness or comment.
"Faith?"
She looks up at me but doesn't say anything.
"You have to go to Cleveland." It completely breaks my heart that she has to leave. I don't know where things were going between us, but none of it is worth her being in danger. I'll make sure she knows that I'll still be here once the threat has passed.
"Yeah." She frowns and pushes her plate away. "You have to come with me."
"What? No. I can't." I back away from her as she stands and walks toward me.
"Yes, you can. You have to." She looks so confident, and I want to give in, but I'm too terrified.
"No." I shake my head and retreat as far as I can. I don't even know how to explain this to her. After the way I treated everyone, how can I possibly go back there? I was willing to work on my relationship with Willow from a distance, but this is just way too much to ask of me.
"B." She smiles and moves closer, pinning me to the counter. "We don't even know for sure that it's me that they want. What if this is just a trick to separate us?"
She makes a good point. My mind races for any kind of argument, but I can barely think with her so close to me.
"Besides." She sweeps her hand through my hair. "If you think for a second that I'm leaving you now - you really have lost your mind."
That gets me to chuckle.
Her hand is resting on my cheek, and she's staring into my eyes. I'm not sure which of us moves first, but our lips meet in a perfect, tender kiss.
The kiss only lasts a few seconds before we both pull back. It's not the time to explore our physical relationship.
"So you're coming?" She asks nervously as if it's her I'd be rejecting.
I bite my lip and lean in again. This kiss is more intense and lasts for far longer than it probably should. "Yes. I'll go anywhere with you, even if we have to ride your bike."
She chuckles and leans her forehead against mine. "I have a plan for that. As much as I love the bike - I'm not sure my ass could take riding all the way to Cleveland on it."
Without my consent, my body rocks against hers at the mention of her ass, and we practically jump apart. We both burst out laughing - each embarrassed in our own way.
I really cannot wait until whatever this danger is over.
"When should we go?" I hope she'll say a few days, but I'm pretty sure waiting will not be an option.
"I guess as soon as possible." She says with a sigh. "It might take me a couple of hours to set up the transportation."
"That will give us time to pack and take care of whatever food we have."
"I'll make some calls and pack." She heads upstairs, and I stay in the kitchen to take stock of what food we have left. There's no way to know how long we'll be gone.
There's not too much in the fridge - just leftover pizza and various lunch meats. As I place the pizza on the counter, I realize I'm avoiding going upstairs.
Once I go up there and start packing - that makes this all real. I feel my heart begin to race as I think about it.
"B?"
I let out a girly scream as I spin to face her.
"Are you OK?" She moves closer and wraps her arms around my waist.
"Not at all."
"Look - I know this is going to be hard. But we'll get through it together." She leans back and sweeps her fingers through my hair before kissing me.
"Together. Right." I say and lean into her touch. Taking a deep breath, I step back from her. "I should go pack."
"Our ride should be here in about an hour." She says, and I get another idea of how to delay packing.
"Can I borrow your phone?"
"Of course." She smiles and hands it over. I'm not sure if I can do this, but I think I have to. If things are ever going to get better, I have to start somewhere.
I make it up to my room and plop down on the bed. It takes me several minutes to drum up the courage to make this call. I tap the contact name and hold my breath. After the second ring, I'm starting to feel hopeful that she won't answer.
"Faith?"
"It's Buffy," I say and brace myself for the attack I know is coming.
"Buffy!" Dawn is clearly excited to hear from me and not at all upset. "Wait - is everything OK? Is Faith OK?"
"Faith is OK. But there is something major going on. I just want to make sure you're safe until it's over." That wasn't what I meant to say. I really just wanted to talk to her and let her know things were going better for Faith and for me.
There's silence for a moment, and I wonder if the call dropped. "How are things going between you?"
"Good, we've been talking a lot more," I say, and she laughs.
"Just good?" I can imagine the smarmy grin she has. "So you haven't figured out that you love each other yet?"
I gasp and almost drop the phone. My first instinct is to deny anything like that is happening, but what would be the point? "We're still working things out." I can't even a little deal with thinking about love right now.
"Well, I'm glad you're finally talking to each other."
"Me too." A part of me wants to explain further. I want someone else to know how amazing I think she is and how much I appreciate having her in my life. It doesn't quite seem like the time for that, though.
Once this is over, we will definitely have some sister bonding time. I have no idea what has been going on in her life, and that needs to be fixed.
"Did you want to talk to Xander?"
"No. Not yet." I say a little too quickly, and I hear her sigh of disappointment. "Maybe once we get settled at the compound. I do need to get going."
"You're going up to the slayer compound?" She sounds totally shocked, and I get why.
"Yeah, it doesn't seem like we have a choice." I'm still hoping that we'll come up with an excuse not to go.
"My classes are over soon - maybe I should..."
"No," I cut her off. "Not until this is all over. They think it's some kind of inside job." I whisper the last part. It makes me sick to think a slayer is part of some evil plot.
"OK, I get it. Look, I gotta go. Tell Faith I said Hi."
"I will - thank you, Dawn."
I hang up the phone and take a deep breath. That was not at all how I expected that conversation to go. I know it won't be this easy with everyone else, but at least someone is giving me a chance.
The phone rings in my hand before I can head downstairs.
The caller ID says it's Willow, and I hesitate for a moment before answering. I wasn't planning to talk to her today, but maybe it's better to just get it over with. Plus, maybe she can tell me more about what's going on with the evil plot.
"Hey, Will."
"Buffy?" She sounds startled, and I know this conversation isn't going to go as well as it did with Dawn.
"Yeah, it's me. What's up?" I try not to sound nervous. I don't want to make things worse by panicking before we even get started.
"Can I talk to Faith?"
"She's busy at the moment - is there something you wanted?" I'm not sure why but something seems off, and I don't want her to talk to Faith.
"Giles says she's refusing to come back with him to Cleveland. I was hoping to convince her to change her mind." I know it's been a few years, but she sounds smarmier than I remembered.
"We're still discussing Faith's plans." I don't want to mention that I'm coming with her until I understand why she really called.
Willow scoffs. "What is there to discuss? Giles has plane tickets for her. There is no other option. She needs to be here as quickly as possible. She's not safe there with you."
Before I can point out that they're the ones that lost the Scythe - she practically starts screaming at me.
"This is all your fault - if you didn't make her feel so guilty, she'd already be with us."
"I never forced her to stay with me." I'm not sure why I'm trying to defend Faith's decisions right now.
"Yeah, right. You've controlled her from the beginning. You tried to force her to be like you, and you ruined her life! She should be here with us - not trapped in the middle of nowhere babysitting your pathetic ass!"
OK - what the fuck is going on here? I know things are still not great between us - but I can't imagine Willow saying this to me.
I am so dumb.
"What advice did I give you that first night at the Bronze?"
"What?" She sputters a bit, and I'm not sure if it's because of the topic change or if she doesn't know the answer.
"C'mon - you must remember." I find it very hard to believe she forgot the advice that ended up with her first encounter with a vampire. I know I'll never get over the guilt of almost getting her killed and then dragging her into the world of demons and magic.
"That was like ten years ago, and you expect me to remember some stupid advice you gave me?" She's sounded frantic and cornered, but I'm still not sure if it's not just because she hates me.
"OK - how about this - what did you tell Xander to tell me just before I had to kill a soulless Angel?" There's no way she forgot about that.
"I have no idea!" She's shouting, and now I'm sure it's not really Willow.
I consider trying to play along a little longer, but whoever this is must realize that I'm on to her. It's time to let Faith know what's going on and figure out what to do next.