Demon_master: FINALLY!!!! The second chapter's up!!!! Wooo~~~~hooooo!!!!!!!!! Do the boogie with me, baby!!!! *does the boogie dance, maniac style*
Both muses: T____________________T################## ……………….
Demon_master: *innocently* What???
Kirei: *trying his utmost best to suppress irrepressible rage* DM, It's been practically a MONTH since you worked on the second chapter.
Fuyuki: *same condition as Kirei* Your beta readers have been COMPLAINING to me how W.O.L.S (spell it backwards) you've been!!!! OH, SWEET MOTHER OF JUPITER, WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO LATELY????!!!!!!
Demon_master: //_____________bbbbb Oi, oi oi!!!!! As if I have a choice about such circumstances!!! I have been revising for 6 tests for week one, suffering from viral infection caused by that ~!@#$%^&*()_+{}|":? flu bug, preparing 5 compositions for my art homework, studying for another THREE maths and chemistry tests for the next week and other things that I don't even want to think about at the present moment!!!!!!!
Both muses: -_______________-|||||||||||||||bbbbbbb …………….
Demon_master: *still brawling at the top of her voice like a strangled chicken* CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW UTTERLY IMMORALE SCHOOLS CAN BE NOWADAYS??????!!!!! 6 TESTS!!!!! 3 tutorial tests and 3 lecture tests, 2 of which are physics, 2 of which are Chinese AO, one of which is Maths C and the last is GP!!!! AND I GOT SICK BECAUSE OF THAT *beep x 10* flu bug!!!! For the past few days, my nose was runny, my face was flushed, I had a splitting headache, my lower jaw felt like lead, and I thought I was GOING TO DIE!!!!! OH THE TEMPORA!!!! OH THE MORALE!!!!!
Both muses: ………………………
Kirei: -____________-||||||||||||||||bbbbbb …….great. Now I feel like the bad guy.
Fuyuki: …….er……….well……..at least chapter 2's up, ne? And it's longer than the first chapter, too! Compensation, I guess.
*DM is still announcing to the entire universe about how school systems nowadays are the heights of injustice*
Fuyuki: Er……..oh yes, we've gotten rid of those infuriating bracket thingies. Hope everyone will have an easier time reading AND reviewing. *glances at the pile of brackets behind her*
Kirei: The HxH characters don't belong to us, but the story does, so you can't sue us. DM's not trying to make money out of her fics, so you can't sue her as well. And she STILL doesn't own the computer she's using for this fic. *glances at DM* And I wish she'll stop being so shakespearish!! She's not even a literature student, for crying out loud!!!! Btw, Hisoka will be making slight appearances in this chapter, so all you Hisoka fans out there, start drooling!!!!
Fuyuki: Read and review, readers!!! And without further adieu, on with the story!!!! n_________n
*Meanwhile, DM's still being very shakespearish and is still yelling halfway across the world. *
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2
~*~ Inside XXXX Senior High School compounds, level 1, the class of 1A2~*~
"Class, this will be your new classmate, Killua Zoldick. He will be joining our class for the rest of the semester, so I do hope all of you will get along with one another," our form teacher, Mrs Vaboom purred.
I have come up with five VERY natural things that a typical female would do once a hunk comes in contact with the 'Hunk Detecting Laser View', otherwise shall be known as HDLV, implanted in every single female straight from birth; Killua is the guinea pig this time. Let's take a look at my raw logic of females :-
(1) Her eyes transform into the size of teacup saucers. Translation: O, wow, what a cutie pie.
(2) She starts to blush as if the weather had been tuned to 'bone-dry sizzle'. Translation: Oh my GOD!!! He's looking at me DIRECTLY with those beautiful, sparkling eyes of his!!!
(3) She starts drooling as if her mouth had sprung a leak. Translation: I wonder how it feels like to have his arms around me…….hehehehehehehe…….*drooling turns into a waterfall *
(4) She begins to have the "cooties" all over "her man" and tries to get closer to him. Translation: CUPID'S JUST GOT TO EXIST IN THE 21ST CENTURY!!!!!!!
(5) She engages herself in catfights over "her man" with females of other species. Translation: HE'S MY PROPERTY, YOU HEAR ME????!!!!!!! NOBODY, AND I MEAN NOBODY, HAS THE LIBERTY TO LOOK AT OR TOUCH HIM EXCEPT ME!!!!!
…………Well, try to imagine the turbulent female population in my class now with the above five listed predictions. If it isn't one, it's the other. Pretty nasty picture, don't you readers out there think so?
The male population, well, let's say they just continue to sulk even more this time. And as expected, the ONLY normal ones are Leolio, Kurapika and I.
Currently, I am frantically trying my utmost best to make my handwriting as gigantic as possible in order to fill up the entire page AND above all, TRYING MY BEST to put the finishing touches to my……erm…….really crumpled piece of essay. I think my essay piece is actually crying. No, wait, I think it just winked at me.
Speaking of homework, until now, I still can't figure out just why Mrs Vaboom wanted an at least 2-paged long essay. Kurapika managed to produce a composition of 4 pages, and his handwriting is PUNY. Speaking of Kurapika, he seems to be playing 'Detective' on the new student. Again. He always does that whenever he comes face to face with a stranger. Sometimes when he does that, it felt as if he had a backstage pass to your mind. Honestly, when we first met in first grade, I wasn't even the least bit angst – ridden about those haunting ocean-green eyes. Me, scared? Na. Never!………although my hands have cold sweat on them………and there were butterflies in my stomach. As for Leolio, he has been turning various shades of never-seen-before greens while having the Kenshin spirally eyes TM for eyes ever since he had first-hand experience kissing a wall. Apparently, he's still at a very unstable and very delicate stage.
And the boys just continued sulking even more than usual, and the girls are still following my derived raw logic, one happening after the other simultaneously.
Killua…..correction, I mean NEKO Killua, just kept yawning and having sweeping glimpses at everything and then he yawned some more and then he began stroking his messy locks and he yawned some more and then he started scratching his left arm and then he yawned even more and then……he dozed off. Standing. Kurapika and I just sweatdropped and |||||||||||, and Leolio is still having spirals for eyes. Judging by the lethargic attitude he is displaying, the only logical reason I can think of for his extreme boredom is because his attention span probably does not last for a mere nanosecond (10^ - 9). Can one actually die from extreme boredom? I heard that it is particularly fatal in old people.
………..And the boys just continued sulking even more than usual, and the girls are still following my derived logic, one happening after the other simultaneously.
"You will be in sitting in that empty seat next to Gon Freeces, Mr. Zoldick." Mrs Vaboom purred. Surprisingly, the particularly chaotic position of our class doesn't seem to bother her the least. Experience, I think.
"……………….betsuni," [1]drawled a sluggish neko Killua as he hauled his feet towards the empty seat near me and plonked down gruffly onto the inoffensive chair. Thirteen pairs of eyes (Kurapika and the female population's) stare at Killua intensely before Mrs Vaboom coughed for attention, or should I say, hissed for attention.
"Class, please hand up your essays to Kurapika and open your textbooks to chapter 15, The Rise of Complex Terrorism "
After fifteen minutes of mind-boggling facts about the complexity of our minds and other things related to computer viruses and so on and so forth, a sudden searing heat flashed down my spine. Boy, was that ever creepy! I shook it off and tried to tune back into Mrs Vaboom's discussion.
…………………………….
There! I felt it again. Something like a red-hot knife drew a line down my backbone. It could just be my over-active imagination, but my instincts told me otherwise. My eyeballs did a 90degree rotation to the right and I found myself face to face with a pair of searing blue orbs. Surprise surprise, it's Killua, who apparently had been bored rigid and began ogling at me to pass the time.
………………………….
Uh oh. This is definitely NOT on the menu of my 'a-bright-and-sunny-perfect-day' recipe. No, I don't mean Killua's intensified stare, I mean the nutty girls in my class. THEY are the ones worth considering twice about your actions when you are around them. Once you get on their bad side, the coffin services are always of great help, because from what I know through experience, one Martian, plus two Venetians, equals to three missing front teeth. Translation: Anybody - in this case, poor me - who gets WAY too close to Prince Charming is a victim who is in the precarious position of being stuck between a rock and a hard place, be it a boy or a girl.
As predicted, the girls were glaring daggers at me, especially a certain redhead …er, pinkhead girl in my class who goes by the name Neon, and not to be rude or anything, but her name best suited her when she began behaving like a young bronco bull. Her face was redder, or pinker, than her hair, and it wasn't because she was all whoopsy-doopsy about Killua (or Kurapika). She would have killed me if she could. But since she couldn't, she just looked death at me before turning her attention back on Mrs Vaboom.
In case you readers out there are wondering about Neon, she was a REAL pain in the pyjamas. Last summer when another striking transfer kid, Hisoka, got transferred to another class and not ours, she threw a tantrum that would definitely bring the entire school six feet underground. You'd think she would've just forgot about the whole thing and concentrate on other things, but that wasn't where the entire thing ended. To make matters worse, Hisoka just HAD to latch onto me like a hungry leech of some sort for no apparent reason and boy, Neon was doing everything in her power to make my life miserable so that Hisoka would turn his attention on her, not that I enjoyed his attention or anything. She'd hide my textbooks and stationery, throw my uniform in the shower after PE, turn off the hot water while I was in there, scribble all over my homework when she had the chance – anything she could think of to get her hands on Hisoka once and for all. She tripped me a couple of times, and shoved me in the pool in my uniform once, but Hisoka yelled at her and helped me out of the pool, so she was more careful after that.
I wanted to punch her out, whether she's a girl or not, but I knew I'd get in trouble if I did, maybe even suspended for who-knows-how-long, so I let her play her stupid tricks, and tried to put my stuff where she couldn't get at it, and kept my distance from her so she couldn't trip me. But then, I was mad and getting madder by the second. I didn't like walking about in the school compounds alone because I knew Neon would pull something, so I usually get Kurapika and Leolio to come along with me. Whatever it is, the cold war between us definitely isn't over yet, and Killua's case is one she wasn't going to take lying down, not when she had a million and one opportunities to woo him. That is, if she hasn't given up on a certain blondie in class or a certain bluehead somewhere out there.
"How old are you?"
I was startled back upon the jagged edge of reality when Killua's monotonous voice infiltrated my thoughts. Seriously, when his voice just came ringing out of the blue, I am most certain that my goose pimples spouted goose pimples. Killua was looking at me as if I had just emerged from under the teacher's table.
"Sixteen."
"…………….Are you sure?"
I glanced at Kurapika. He just shrugged, and I started to think maybe the new kid had some kind of mental problem. He'd seemed all right when Mrs Vaboom introduced him to the class. He was quite tall and tough looking, with azure blue eyes that stared right through you and made you think he could see everything in your head, but he wasn't all that bad, just like any other regular kid like me, so I thought he was okay, and now he was looking at me as if I'd lied to him, although I had a very strong suspicion why he asked.
"Yeah, I'm sure," I replied. "Why?"
"……………..Well………….you don't look your age."
THAT confirmed my suspicions. I knew I didn't look my age. In fact, I looked more like a twelve-year-old kid instead of a proper sixteen teenager. Genetic problems, I suppose, but it still disturbs me whenever someone brought up the subject of height differences. Being short had its setbacks, not to mention having the tendency to draw bullies to you just because you look beatable. I remembered at the end of last summer right after track-and-field tryouts, when I came out of the shower, there were two guys waiting for me. One of them hung back, and I knew I could ignore him, but the other one shoved his face in mine. He was WAY taller than me, with short moss-green hair [2] and freckles, and his eyes were light grey, almost colourless. I tried to go around him, but he stepped in my way.
"Nobody wants you on this track-and-field team, Faeces," he drawled.
Real original. This guy wasn't worth getting mad at, so I just shrugged. "Well, the coach does."
He still wouldn't let me by. "You think you're so special, don't you shortie?"
"No." I grinned at him. "Just better than you." And that's the truth. During tryouts, I had taken thirty-nine seconds off his best time in the hundred, and from what I know about the guys on the team who decided they didn't like the new guy, they LOATHED being second best, especially this guy who believes that pride-cracking is an unrepentable (a/n: does such a word exist?) sin.
He would've punched me then, but Hisoka came into the locker room and he had to back off, because by then everybody knows that Hisoka's bad side is not to be trifled with, and for once, I was glad about Hisoka's jack-in-a-box timing. Before he went, he muttered, "I'll get you for this, you Faeces shortie." Like I said, real original. This jerk watched WAY too much television.
"MAN!! This is ssssssoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tiresome! How could you stand all of this? Er…your name's Gon, right?
I looked at Killua. He's sure one kid with a major attitude problem. "Well, I don't deny the fact that I don't like certain subjects, but I still try to find the interesting parts in that subject to make it more fascinating. You should try it too, Killua!" (The truth) I smiled at him.
"Sheesh, you're sure one weird kid! I could never be this perspective looking." He glanced at the timetable pinned up on the wall and face-faulted. "…………And History's next."
"History's not half as bad as you think, Killua-kun. It's just a way of how you look at things."
"…………….."
"…………….nani?"
"……..never mind." And with that the attitude problemo kid decided that staring at walls is the absolute perfect hobby to adopt.
Now it's my turn to, "…………………."
~*~*~*~*~
~*~ After bell ring, in the history classroom ~*~
"~`!@#$%^'",./? …………why me…….?" Growled a remarkably pissed off neko Killua as he plonked himself next to me. Apparently, he was having a race against time with unknown Venetians and managed to soar into class at the last minute as a black blur, leaving a string of dust clouds behind him. Knowing that this is not the right time to say something or anything, I just kept my mouth shut and let him do the talking.
"BEEP!!!! Why the BEEP! do those BEEP!ing BEEP! onnas just leave MUA alone and go BEEP!ing bishonen-hunting someplace else?!" [3] Killua was noticeably cantankerous at the present moment, and as if on cue, Kurapika and Leolio (a/n: Seriously, I don't think Leolio count as a bishonen.) decided to appear beside us. Kurapika looked at Killua with a gracious but indescribable air/aura. Killua was returning Kurapika's look, and Leolio just stood there dumbly, without a clue of what is happening. Sensing the increasingly tensing, not to mention stifling atmosphere about me, I decided to step in. Rather awkwardly.
"Konnichiwa! Klappy-kun, Leo-kun! Killua-kun, these are my two best buddies, Kurapika-kun and Leolio-kun. Guys, I believe you know Killua-kun."
"Yes, I most certainly know who Killua-kun is, Gon-kun." Kurapika replied in a voice that would have frozen the entire city twice over.
Leolio just had his trademark maniac grin on and was beaming at Killua, so I knew I don't have to worry along the lines of 'guys who decided they don't like the new guy'.
The History teacher chose the exact moment to arrive and everybody went about to their seats. Kurapika shot Killua the we'll-talk-to-you-later look before joining Leolio at the centre of the classroom and Killua got his first – and definitely the last – impression of our History teacher. She was a tiny little "dwarf" (Redundant, isn't it?) who had to stand on a pile of encyclopaedias to see over her desk, and as I've said before, genetic problems seemed to be in fashion this summer. At the start of our lesson she took the register, and when she reached Killua's name she gave an excited squeak and toppled out of sight, and why wouldn't she? Nobody could blame Killua for being THE perfect student, with everything anybody – especially a certain red/pinkhead – could ask for.
For the next tedious half an hour the History teacher droned on and on while we – except Killua, whose actions are becoming predictable – scribbled down names and dates and got Alexander the Great, Oscar Francois de Jarjayeys [4], Marie Antoinette and Napoleon mixed up.
After concluding the chapter on 'The Rise and Fall of the French Revolution and the Aftermaths', we began on the chapter of China's history. At this point, the History teacher reached into her bag and pulled out a magnificent – and original - Ming vase. I'm not a mean person, but I would just like to take one minute off by commenting, the look on Neon's face is more priceless than the vase.
She passed the vase around so that the class could get a good look at it and when it landed in Killua's arms – Warning. Danger's at foot – she just had to ask the opinion of the richest boy in the entire universe about her precious Ming vase and in my book, that is a bad move AND a personal insult to the Zoldick's fame and fortune.
As if on cue with my thoughts, he did something that sends every living soul in the classroom into a state of utmost disbelief and shock.
He smashed the vase. Deliberately.
"Ming, shming. They don't make 'm like they used to." Killua drawled with an air of arrogance as he cast his perfect nose skywards.
…………………………
There was a stunned silence. The atmosphere was so still, one could hear a plant grow.
Before…
"WHA! … GUH! … I DON'T! … BUH! …YOU!! …YOU!!!"
I decided that before the History teacher becomes an atomic and nuclear bomb combined, I ducked underneath the table and stayed there. Pronto.
Kurapika was in a state of unspoken shock and seemed to be making the most difficult decision of his life – to faint or not to faint.
Leolio paled instantaneously and was in the state of opening and closing his mouth as if to comment or advised Killua to apologise to the teacher before it's too late, but nothing came out although air molecules did went in, so he just looked the opposite way so that nobody could see his face.
Neon, however, was looking at Killua as if he was the coolest hunk she had crossed paths with and fell in love with him all over again. Just the sight of her in seventh heaven makes me want to barf, not that I am rude or anything, she just happened to have a kind of power to trigger somebody's bad side on her and because of her snotty attitude, it was the greatest and dearest ambition of many to give her a good kick, that perhaps includes Hisoka on the list.
The authoress and her muses are going about preparing smelling salts and an extra sealed bottle of ammonia solution just in case anyone in her fic DID swooned.
"YOU DUMB BOY!!! YOU'RE SO IGNORANT, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DID!!!!" And with that, the History teacher rocketed out of the classroom with incredible speed despite her height, bawling something that sounded suspiciously like "boys nowadays".
Killua just maintained his haughty air while replying nonchalantly to nobody in particular, "I know I destroyed a 'priceless' Ming Dynasty vase as an overt expression to communicate my contempt for the politically oppressive doctrines of their early 17th century administration, that's all."
That was the last straw and Kurapika promptly collapsed. The authoress immediately howled for the medics to tend to Kurapika as a string of swears emerged from her mouth because one good character's out cold. Of course, this process earned her enough stares of utmost fury from the Venetians in her fic, but since she's the authoress and that makes her the Goddess of Fics, she can do anything to her fics and has given special permission to her muses to do anything they want to the girls of the next chapter. That shut them up and they proceeded with their casts.
Leolio decided that warm cinnamon tea would do the trick to pass the time and brought out a whole flask of it to wolf down.
And me?
All I can say is, with all the cobwebs in my head at that moment it's impossible for me to think straight, so I just did the next best thing after Kurapika. Faint.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Footnotes:
[1] 'Betsuni' means 'whatever'.
[2] I am NOT, I repeat I AM NOT indicating Heero Yuy.
[3] I will NOT corrupt young minds by writing down all those languages down in my fic.
Kirei: *mumbles* who are you kidding? You don't even know half of those words' meaning.
[4] Oscar Francois de Jarjayeys is a character from the anime 'Rose of Versailles'. It's good stuff as it tells and informs about the rise and fall of the French Revolution. I have absolutely no idea whether she (yes, you heard me, Oscar's a SHE) is a real person in French History, although I'll waggle that she's not.
~*~*~
Demon_master: ………….and I've just completed my common tests and am currently down with flu. Again. And I've got to sit for a physics retest, 'cos I got an AO level passing grade. *huff* *huff*
Kirei: T________T#### ………...And yet another cliffhanger. Sheesh, Koganei is going to send you more death threats than you've ever bargained for.
Fuyuki: I second that. *crosses arms over chest*
Demon_master *still panting* this is called I-have-to-stay-in-bed-because-I-am-sick.
Fuyuki: Betsuni. Anyway, you had better get on with your GW fanfic and at the same time, take care that this series CONTINUES.
Demon_master: ………….
Kirei: And no excuses like 'I'm tired and I want to go to bed' or 'I need to do homework' when you don't even have any homework in the first place.
Demon_master: …………………..
Fuyuki: Oh, yes, absolutely NO excuses.
Demon_master: ……………………………..*sweatdrops**nervously* So, what does everyone think so far? Is it better? Nastier? You guys like it? Hate it? Want me to forget about the fact that this entire fic even existed in the first place?
Kirei: O_O!!!!!!!!!!! You had better NOT "junk" this fic!
Fuyuki: For your information, your muses would be most insulted! *to the audience* And please review. Maybe it would make DM stop her non-sensible babbling and get more work done…… -__________-bbbbbb
Kirei: But then again, you never know just when and where she'll type up another tempest. Let's face it, all her fics consist of cold jokes, one of the reasons why I'm SO BORED!!!!!!
Demon_master: //________|||||||bbbbb Click the blue thingie already!!!