CHAPTER TWO
Well folks, you wanted more? You got more! This is chapter two of Chibi
Gundams Nursery Rhymes! They may not be as good as the rhymes I made up
before, but hey, this is my muse's day off. Well, anyhoo, enjoy and
remember to-HEY!!!! WUFEI!!!! STOP LIFTING UP BARBIE'S SHIRT!!!! YOU CAN'T
SEE THOSE YET!!!!!!
THE THREE LITTLE KITTENS //Three little kittens lost their mittens// Quatre: NOOO!!! MY FAVORITE MITTENS!!! Duo: I'm glad I lost those sorry lumps of wool. They weren't black. Heero: Hnh. **Shoots mittens.** //And they began to cry.// QUATRE: WWWAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!! :'( Duo: Boo. Hoo. Hoo. Heero: Hnh. //'Oh mother dear, see hear, see hear! Our mittens we have lost.'// Quatre: MOMMY!!!! I'VE LOST MY MITTENS!!!! Relena: **Hugs him.** ^.^ It's okay. Duo: That THING is my MOM?!?!?!?! Heero: Hnh. **Shoots Relena.** //'You lost your mittens, you naughty kittens! Now you shall have no pie!'// Quatre: I didn't lose mine! I just can't FIND it!!! Duo: .we have to have mittens to eat pie?? Heero: **Being spanked by Relena.** -.-; //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: **Looks up at the sky.** You have a repeating problem or something?? Authoress: No! It's in the nursery rhyme!! //The three little kittens found their mittens// //And they began to cry// Quatre: MITTENS!!! **Hugs his mittens.** ^.^ Duo: I still don't like these mittens. Heero: Hnh. **Rubs his butt-which as a huge band-aid on it.** //'Oh mother dear, see here! See here! Our mittens we have found!'// //'You good little kittens! You've found your mittens. Now you shall have some pie!'// Quatre: Yummy! Thanks, Mummy! **Eats pie.** Duo: Whatever. **Throws pie at Authoress.** Heero: Hnh. **Shoots pie.** //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: I DO think you have a repeating problem. Authoress: Shut up. //The three little kittens, they soiled their mittens// //And they began to cry.// Quatre: Umm..I think I've soiled more then my mittens. Duo: Thank God. Now I can get rid of these annoying things. Heero: Hnh. **Shoots soiled mittens.** //'Oh mother dear, see here see here! Our mittens we have soiled.'// //'You naughty kittens, you've soiled your mittens! Now you shall have no pie.'// Relena: **Spanking Heero again.** Heero: Hnh. Duo: **Looks at watch.**Enough with the freakin' pie!!! Quatre: **Sniffs.** My..my mittens.. //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: Now I'm SURE you have a repeating problem! Authoress: **Looks thoughtful.** Well.it could be a Meow Mix commercial.
NUMBERS //One, two, buckle my shoe// Quatre: Someone tie my shoelaces! //Three, four, shut the door// Doorbell: Dingdong. (The witch is dead..) Heero: **Answers it.** Relena: HEEERRRROOOO!!!!! Heero: **Slams door shut and begins shooting it.** Duo: o.O I thought the rhyme said 'shut' not 'slam.' //Five, six, pick up sticks// Trowa: **Picking up sticks in the woods.** Why oh WHY does Cathy have to make soup over an open flame?? I could be playing Mario Brothers right now! -_- //Seven, eight, lay them straight.// Duo: Straight?? **Sweatdrop.** Authoress: **Rolls eyes.** //Nine, ten, a big fat hen.** Relena: BAWK BAWK BAWK!!!!!! **Ten minutes later.** Heero: Yes, Kentucky Fried Chicken? Hey, I have a present for the colonel.
LITTLE BOY BLUE //Little boy blue, come blow your horn// Duo: **In a farmer's outfit.** Why can't it be little boy BLACK??? Authoress: You're supposed to be asleep. //Come blow your horn.// Duo: Will a tuba, trumpet, French horn, or saxophone work for ya?? //The sheep's in the meadow// //The cow's in the corn.// Relena: MoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo!!!! **Eats popcorn.** //But where is the little boy who looks after sheep?// Duo: He's hitchhiked to South America to get the heck outta this rhyme. //He's under the haystack, fast asleep.// Duo: **Under a haystack.** Sorry, I don't sleep. Authoress: Ever? Duo: Ever.
THUMBKIN //Where is thumbkin, where is thumbkin??// Heero: I shot him. Duo: He got away from this craziness, like I should've. Trowa: .. Quatre: He's probably asleep somewhere where there's no war. Wufei: THE WEAKLING RAN AWAY?! INJUSTICE!!!! //Here I am! Here I am!!// Heero: **Shoots the little bugger.** Duo: Run, little guy, run! You can still get away! Trowa: . Quatre: Thumbkin, you want some tea? Wufei: He's so weak he's making me sick! **Barfs.** Authoress: I'm sorry, these boys aren't behaving, so on to the next rhyme! **Glares at G-Boys.**
LONDON BRIDGE //London bridge is falling down// Heero: Because I planted explosives under it. It's really an OZ base. //Falling down, falling down!// Duo: .She DOES have a repeating problem! Quatre: A bridge is falling?? Is everyone safe? Was anyone hurt?? Who made this faulty bridge? I'm gonna sue 'em!!! //London bridge is falling down// //My fair lady!// Relena: Rebuild the bridge, and get me a martini! And put one of those little umbrellas in it! ^.^ Heero: ..She's FAIR?!?!?!?!
TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR //Twinkle, twinkle, little star// //How I wonder what you are.// Heero: Sorry about the star affect. It's really me blowing up a colony. Duo: It's the apocalypse! I'm going home!!! Trowa: Don't know. Don't care. Quatre: It's really a ball of gas burning a billion miles away! Wufei: It's not Nataku, so who cares?? //Up above the world so high// //Like a diamond in the sky// Heero: I said it before, it's a colony blowing up. Duo: **Writing his will in case anyone survives.** Trowa: .. Quatre: Diamonds? I've got dozens of them! Wufei: A high diamond? Great, now there are jewels on crack! //Twinkle, twinkle little star,// //How I wonder what you are.// Heero: **Takes deep breath.** When missiles hit high-resistance glass, there's an effect that's like a star burning. Duo: It's gonna kill us all! Why are you SINGING about it?!?!? Trowa: ... Quatre: Either you want gasoline or a diamond. Which one?? Wufei: Weak little stars.
ROW YOUR BOAT //Row, row, row your boat// //Gently down the stream// Duo: **In a boat.** I hate rowing!!! **Whips out paddles and begins slapping the water.** //Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,// //Life is but a dream// Duo: I hate this boat AND my life!! Both are nightmares, if that's what you mean!!!
THE END!!!!!! T-Chan: Hope you like it!!! ^.^ Chibi Wufei: **Sets Ken doll on fire.** T-Chan: Ladies and gents, we have a pyrokinetic in the making here! Duo: You mean like that movie Firestarter? T-Chan: Kind of. Well, review and tell me what you think!!!!
THE THREE LITTLE KITTENS //Three little kittens lost their mittens// Quatre: NOOO!!! MY FAVORITE MITTENS!!! Duo: I'm glad I lost those sorry lumps of wool. They weren't black. Heero: Hnh. **Shoots mittens.** //And they began to cry.// QUATRE: WWWAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!! :'( Duo: Boo. Hoo. Hoo. Heero: Hnh. //'Oh mother dear, see hear, see hear! Our mittens we have lost.'// Quatre: MOMMY!!!! I'VE LOST MY MITTENS!!!! Relena: **Hugs him.** ^.^ It's okay. Duo: That THING is my MOM?!?!?!?! Heero: Hnh. **Shoots Relena.** //'You lost your mittens, you naughty kittens! Now you shall have no pie!'// Quatre: I didn't lose mine! I just can't FIND it!!! Duo: .we have to have mittens to eat pie?? Heero: **Being spanked by Relena.** -.-; //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: **Looks up at the sky.** You have a repeating problem or something?? Authoress: No! It's in the nursery rhyme!! //The three little kittens found their mittens// //And they began to cry// Quatre: MITTENS!!! **Hugs his mittens.** ^.^ Duo: I still don't like these mittens. Heero: Hnh. **Rubs his butt-which as a huge band-aid on it.** //'Oh mother dear, see here! See here! Our mittens we have found!'// //'You good little kittens! You've found your mittens. Now you shall have some pie!'// Quatre: Yummy! Thanks, Mummy! **Eats pie.** Duo: Whatever. **Throws pie at Authoress.** Heero: Hnh. **Shoots pie.** //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: I DO think you have a repeating problem. Authoress: Shut up. //The three little kittens, they soiled their mittens// //And they began to cry.// Quatre: Umm..I think I've soiled more then my mittens. Duo: Thank God. Now I can get rid of these annoying things. Heero: Hnh. **Shoots soiled mittens.** //'Oh mother dear, see here see here! Our mittens we have soiled.'// //'You naughty kittens, you've soiled your mittens! Now you shall have no pie.'// Relena: **Spanking Heero again.** Heero: Hnh. Duo: **Looks at watch.**Enough with the freakin' pie!!! Quatre: **Sniffs.** My..my mittens.. //Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.// Duo: Now I'm SURE you have a repeating problem! Authoress: **Looks thoughtful.** Well.it could be a Meow Mix commercial.
NUMBERS //One, two, buckle my shoe// Quatre: Someone tie my shoelaces! //Three, four, shut the door// Doorbell: Dingdong. (The witch is dead..) Heero: **Answers it.** Relena: HEEERRRROOOO!!!!! Heero: **Slams door shut and begins shooting it.** Duo: o.O I thought the rhyme said 'shut' not 'slam.' //Five, six, pick up sticks// Trowa: **Picking up sticks in the woods.** Why oh WHY does Cathy have to make soup over an open flame?? I could be playing Mario Brothers right now! -_- //Seven, eight, lay them straight.// Duo: Straight?? **Sweatdrop.** Authoress: **Rolls eyes.** //Nine, ten, a big fat hen.** Relena: BAWK BAWK BAWK!!!!!! **Ten minutes later.** Heero: Yes, Kentucky Fried Chicken? Hey, I have a present for the colonel.
LITTLE BOY BLUE //Little boy blue, come blow your horn// Duo: **In a farmer's outfit.** Why can't it be little boy BLACK??? Authoress: You're supposed to be asleep. //Come blow your horn.// Duo: Will a tuba, trumpet, French horn, or saxophone work for ya?? //The sheep's in the meadow// //The cow's in the corn.// Relena: MoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo!!!! **Eats popcorn.** //But where is the little boy who looks after sheep?// Duo: He's hitchhiked to South America to get the heck outta this rhyme. //He's under the haystack, fast asleep.// Duo: **Under a haystack.** Sorry, I don't sleep. Authoress: Ever? Duo: Ever.
THUMBKIN //Where is thumbkin, where is thumbkin??// Heero: I shot him. Duo: He got away from this craziness, like I should've. Trowa: .. Quatre: He's probably asleep somewhere where there's no war. Wufei: THE WEAKLING RAN AWAY?! INJUSTICE!!!! //Here I am! Here I am!!// Heero: **Shoots the little bugger.** Duo: Run, little guy, run! You can still get away! Trowa: . Quatre: Thumbkin, you want some tea? Wufei: He's so weak he's making me sick! **Barfs.** Authoress: I'm sorry, these boys aren't behaving, so on to the next rhyme! **Glares at G-Boys.**
LONDON BRIDGE //London bridge is falling down// Heero: Because I planted explosives under it. It's really an OZ base. //Falling down, falling down!// Duo: .She DOES have a repeating problem! Quatre: A bridge is falling?? Is everyone safe? Was anyone hurt?? Who made this faulty bridge? I'm gonna sue 'em!!! //London bridge is falling down// //My fair lady!// Relena: Rebuild the bridge, and get me a martini! And put one of those little umbrellas in it! ^.^ Heero: ..She's FAIR?!?!?!?!
TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR //Twinkle, twinkle, little star// //How I wonder what you are.// Heero: Sorry about the star affect. It's really me blowing up a colony. Duo: It's the apocalypse! I'm going home!!! Trowa: Don't know. Don't care. Quatre: It's really a ball of gas burning a billion miles away! Wufei: It's not Nataku, so who cares?? //Up above the world so high// //Like a diamond in the sky// Heero: I said it before, it's a colony blowing up. Duo: **Writing his will in case anyone survives.** Trowa: .. Quatre: Diamonds? I've got dozens of them! Wufei: A high diamond? Great, now there are jewels on crack! //Twinkle, twinkle little star,// //How I wonder what you are.// Heero: **Takes deep breath.** When missiles hit high-resistance glass, there's an effect that's like a star burning. Duo: It's gonna kill us all! Why are you SINGING about it?!?!? Trowa: ... Quatre: Either you want gasoline or a diamond. Which one?? Wufei: Weak little stars.
ROW YOUR BOAT //Row, row, row your boat// //Gently down the stream// Duo: **In a boat.** I hate rowing!!! **Whips out paddles and begins slapping the water.** //Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,// //Life is but a dream// Duo: I hate this boat AND my life!! Both are nightmares, if that's what you mean!!!
THE END!!!!!! T-Chan: Hope you like it!!! ^.^ Chibi Wufei: **Sets Ken doll on fire.** T-Chan: Ladies and gents, we have a pyrokinetic in the making here! Duo: You mean like that movie Firestarter? T-Chan: Kind of. Well, review and tell me what you think!!!!