CHAPTER 16:

John followed Aaron as they made their way through the club, getting pulled along by the hand he held. A giddiness filled him as he walked, excitement as he thought about how long it had been since he'd climbed into bed with anyone. He skipped a step and pulled up closer to Aaron, hugging his arm to his chest. He was rewarded with a smirk, and before John could wonder where the charming smile went, Aaron broke his arm free and swept it around to pull John in close to his chest. John blushed and buried his face against the man's shoulder, smelling the rich scent of his leather jacket and aftershave, so different from the flowery scents Lafayette wore or the simple musk and laundry soap scent of Alex. John wrapped his arms around Aaron's waist and nuzzled him as they stopped in front of a door. He thought it was just an exit, but when the man produced a card key and opened it, the door swung into a little room with a security guard monitoring the surveillance footage of the club. Aaron didn't allow John a moment to look around as he was pulled through the room and to another door, this one lead to an elevator. "Leslie, where are we going?" John asked.

"My place, baby," Aaron replied, shooting him an easy smile. "Third floor of this building. The rent is cheaper that way." He tugged John closer to his body, then hit a button that closed the door behind them. As the doors swung shut, Aaron pushed John up against one of the walls and kissed him, pulling John's pelvis against his own. John squirmed for a moment until he started to notice how aroused he was. He never went for aggressive or assertive guys, even Lafayette had to tread carefully to get John to open up the first time...but then John thought that this was the point. It wasn't about finding someone to replace Lafayette or Lin by being another sweet, gentle, sensitive guy who would cater to all of John's needs; this was about primal sex, and a need to fucking feel another human's naked body pressed up against his, someone he could use for a night of fun and then never have to see again if he didn't want to. His hands came up around Aaron's neck, John wanted to jump up and wrap his legs around the man's waist as well. The friction on his crotch, the cool steel wall at his back, and Aaron nipping at his mouth...shit, it was making him horny.

He wondered what else Aaron would nip at and a moment later he was tilting his head to the side to let him bite and suck on his neck. It felt good being touched, and ground against and kissed and bit. Even when he squeaked because Aaron sunk his teeth in a little too hard, John felt himself get harder. Funny, he couldn't remember ever liking this before...

Well, he was liking it now. That's all John wanted to hear in his body. And a lot of places were lighting up green to be touched right now. He wanted his nipples rubbed, he wanted his dick stroked, he wanted his ass filled, he wanted his hair pulled. Hell, Aaron could have slapped him then and John was pretty sure he'd cum from it on the spot.

The doors pinged open and John felt Aaron sweep his feet out from under him. Instinctively he threw his arms around the man's neck and held on as he was carried through what looked like a fancy condo. John would have maybe been more impressed, if he'd been given a tour or allowed any time to take in the décor as it passed by in a blur, but he was brought straight to the bedroom and then dumped almost unceremoniously onto a bed.

"What happened to talking?" John said, already opening his legs as Aaron crawled on top of him.

"Later," Aaron said, pushing up John's shirt. "We'll have plenty to talk about after I get done showing you a really good time." John almost couldn't believe how his body felt as those hands glided up his chest and he wanted to feel them wrapped around his cock, wiggling up into his ass. God, he couldn't recall ever being this horny before. As soon as John's shirt was cast aside, he started undoing his own pants, and he almost had them off when Aaron pulled his hand away from his undone fly though and pinned them to either side of his head. He leaned in to kiss John more, grinding their hips together again. John tilted his head back, breaking the kiss to moan his pleasure. "Heh, you like that, don't you, you nasty little slut? Bet you can't wait to let me get behind you and slam you good and hard."

John bit down on his lip. His body was screaming at him not to fuck this up, not to take this away, but his mind was chirping that something was...off. "Leslie, ease up a little bit, okay?"

"On what?"

John wiggled as he tried to clear his mind of all his body's signals telling him to shut up and let them get started, trying to find the words that wouldn't upset this lover so they could both get what they wanted, or John supposed in his case what he needed. "Don't...don't speak to me like that, I'm...not into it...please..."

"Awww, is my baby a little sensitive to dirty talk?" Aaron cooed almost condescendingly. "You're so cute."

"You don't need to coo at me like a child either," John growled.

"Sorry big boy, just trying to find what you like." Aaron slid off him and John whimpered thinking he'd upset the guy. But if Aaron heard him he didn't acknowledge it as he opened a drawer in his nightstand and fetched a box from inside. "At least tell me you like playing with toys?"

"Like...sex toys?" John asked, thinking of the selection Alex had on his order screen.

"No John, action figures," Aaron replied with a smile as he dug out a rubber dong and waved it about. "Like this one. You wanna show me how you like to play with yourself?"

"I've...never played with a toy before..." John said as he sat up. It was too risky to keep them with himself when he was at home in South Carolina and he'd been too shy to get one while he shared a room with another person, but all the times he'd asked Alex to play with one hadn't left him clueless. The sudden knowledge that Alex likely wouldn't care if John had his own toy made him blush, especially as he thought of Alex's inclinations to work with them, And that meant that if John wanted to he certainly could go out and buy one now.

"You haven't?" Aaron said, sounding a bit surprised and drawing John's attention back to him. He handed over the one in his hand as John reached for it and smiled at the way the other male marveled for a second at the feel of it. "Well, now's as good a time as any to get into it, don't you think?"

John nodded, feeling that euphoric feeling of giddiness wash over him again. A silly thought entered his brain then, what if he pretended to be Alex pretending to be Lin? It made him smile and John decided he'd give it a go, since he was all for new experiences tonight. He kissed at the toy the way he'd seen Lin do and licked up it's side, trying to eye Aaron seductively. "How does that make you feel?" he asked, boosted as he saw the smile widen on the man's face.

"I do like that," Aaron told him. "Show me what else you can do with that toy."

"Will I get any lube?" John asked, trying to mimic the way Lin always sounded submissive when he asked. Aaron pulled out a bottle from the box and handed it to John who took it happily. He kicked off his shoes and socks before climbing onto the middle of Aaron's bed and standing on his knees as he started pulling his pants off the rest of the way. He was already leaking precum with a semi-hard dick hard from the earlier friction.

Then the sight of the bandages reminded him of the the mutilations of scar tissue that ran all up and down his legs and hit him like a punch to the gut.

"What's wrong?" John heard Aaron ask and he looked up in confusion. How could Aaron not see what was wrong with him? How could he not find him disgusting and broken and something to be pitied? How could John really think he deserved any of the affection he was hoping to receive? A chuckled laugh cut through John's alarming thoughts of self-hatred and disgust, and for a moment John thought he was being laughed at. "Don't tell me you got shy all of a sudden."

"but my cuts," John replied, as he looked down at his legs again. "...my scars..."

"We all have scars, baby boy," Aaron told him. "And I'm not here to scrutinize yours." It sounded enough like reassurance. Was it reassurance? It sounded enough like reassurance and John wanted to be touched. When Aaron ran a hand up his bare side it sent lightening sparks of electricity all through his body. As Aaron rolled his palm over John's chest and then circled back around to tease a nipple, John tilted his head back and moaned. And when Aaron's other hand cupped John's chin and slid a thumb inside his mouth, John suckled on it like it was his only purpose in life. "You should get that toy in your ass soon, John," Aaron's voice whispered in his ear. "Because it's the only preparation you'll have before I decide when I want in."

John fumbled blindly with the rubber dildo in his hand, feeling more then seeing the lube he squeezed onto it. As one of Aaron's hands slid down to grip John's dick, he found that holding concentration on anything that he was doing was quite hard and gave up trying to think his way through the motions. His slick fingers fumbled the bottle and it fell away, as far as John was concerned now it no longer existed. He pressed his own fingers against his ass, wanting to buck into the hand that held him from the front, but Aaron seemed to be using that part of him and his chin more to keep John upright and steady. The toy slid in a moment later, reaching deeper into himself then he could get on his own. It ran over that bundle of nerves and John gasped as an even more intense feeling spider webbed in his body.

"You like that, don't you?" Aaron was asking him. He pulled his thumb out of John's mouth and smiled as John nodded happily for him. "Do you wish it was me inside you?"

"It will be soon," John said, pulling the toy back and shoving it in again. One of his hands stayed on the toy, fucking himself slowly so he could feel every pulse of arousal in himself, the other reached out around Aaron's shoulder for leverage. He felt silly for ever being worried about this in the first place. Aaron was rubbing a thumb over his leaking cock and getting him off, his prostate was flooding him with happy little waves of pleasure, and John had never felt more confident or content in the universe. "Ahhh, Leslie, I can't wait, I want you," John moaned.

"How soon do you want me?" Aaron asked, smiling.

John suddenly realized that his partner was still fully dressed and he let go of playing with the toy in his own ass to bring his arms around Aaron's neck. He kissed him hungrily for a moment, then brought his hands down to push open that leather jacket. Aaron let go of his penis then, let go of all of John, and he broke the kiss to protest before he looked down and saw him unbuckling his pants. "Oooh, what have you got down there for me?" John asked, feeling more excitement. He giggled to himself a moment later, asking, "Is it a shark dick?"

"Boy, you are high," Aaron muttered with a chuckle. "Maybe I gave you too much."

"Too much what?" John asked, missing the implication. "Too much sugar, sugar sweet-talkin' Yankee boy?" He giggled into Aaron's neck and then nuzzled the collar out of the way so he could kiss the dark skin he found there.

"You wanna put that mouth of yours to some actual good use?" Aaron asked and John nodded against him. "Then stop trying to give me a hickie and start sucking me off."

John sat back on his legs and pushed some strains of hair that were coming loose back behind his ear as he looked down at Aaron's cock. He wet his lips and hoped the things Lafayette had always told him he liked were universal tricks of pleasure. Aaron wasn't as hard as John was just yet, but he was gunna change that. He bent forward and took Aaron into his mouth, sucking him in and letting his slick lips slide all the way down the shaft. He heard Aaron groan above him and John smiled temporarily around the dick in his mouth. He wrapped his tongue around the underside, using it as a barricade between his own bottom teeth and the cock. He drew back til he was almost at the tip, then slid Aaron back inside him, matching the slow and sensual pace he'd used with the toy still filling his ass.

John rubbed one of his hands over his own cock, feeling how hard he was and how much he wanted to buck soon. He sucked a little harder on his next drag, hoping that would get Aaron stiffer quicker. A hand bumped into the knot of hair that was his ponytail in an attempt to interlock among the curls. None too gently it started trying to pull the hair tie out and forced John to stop what he was doing and pull back.

"Cut it out, that hurts," he complained.

"Take your hair tie out," Aaron demanded. "It's in the way."

"Do you see this mane? It goes all over the place if it's not tied back."

"You'll look better with it down."

John was almost surprised by the compliment, tho he didn't know why. Maybe because he wasn't expecting it, maybe because he really thought this was just gunna be a fuck and run. He gave a coy little smile and reached for the hair tie, pulling it loose so his curls could spill back around his face and over his shoulders. "You really like this better?"

"Sure do," Aaron told him. He gave John a shove just hard enough to push him to fall back on to the bed, then Aaron threw off his jacket and pulled off his shirt, revealing the lean and fit torso underneath. "You look more like a girl that way."

"I'm not a girl tho," John protested.

"Yeah, that's a shame."

John narrowed his eyes as he considered Aaron. "Why would you fuck me if you're into women?"

The other male chuckled. "Oh no, baby, you got it wrong," he cooed as he crawled up over John, tangling a hand tightly in John's hair. "I mean, don't you ever think sometimes your life would be better if you weren't a little fucking queer?" Something told John there was something more to that sentence, something else Aaron was saying to him, but all he could hear was his own insecurities being echoed back to him. Of course John wondered what it would be like if he found woman attractive, if he could convince himself to really love a woman the way his parents wanted. But whatever ability he might have had to do that was stripped away when he was a kid and forced into the laps of females who had no business showing him any of the things they had when they told him they were going to make him better. John mentally shook the thought away and came back to Aaron, seeing him stroking himself mere inches from John's face. "I'm sure you'll be a lot more fun to play with tho. I'm getting hard just thinking about all the ways I wanna fuck you over some dumb whore."

"Heh, what are you gunna do to me?" John asked, feeling cocky in his sudden confidence.

Aaron smiled coldly and trailed a hand slowly down John's exposed chest again until he reached his groin where he traced his fingers around John's cock. "Oh no, if I told you what I have in mind to do to you then you might not want to stay."

"Give me an idea," John moaned, bucking a bit into that hand. He yelped lightly when he was squeezed and he wondered when he'd get to thrust himself inside Aaron. At this rate he didn't think he'd last much longer, and he wasn't sure if several rounds were acceptable for one night stands. But maybe...John moaned again as he was stroked; just maybe Aaron would want to play with him through the night.

Something brushed against his lips and John realized his head had been brought to Aaron's crotch again; it was his semi hard dick that was being slid into his mouth. "You're gunna suck me til I'm ready to turn you over and take you in the ass, and I want you to scream for me the entire way, understand?" Aaron told him and John hummed around the cock in his mouth. He wanted to point out how silly it was to expect him to scream with his mouth full, but then he thought it would be a better use of time to see if he couldn't just make Aaron scream instead. If the little gasp Aaron gave him in response was anything to go by, John supposed he would be good at it. He suckled and hummed until Aaron started bucking his hips into John's mouth, eager to get his mouth to the end of his length, holding John's head from pulling away or controlling the thrusting. Both of Aaron's hands were in his hair now, grabbing fistfuls to keep John's head where he wanted. It felt like hours had passed as John worked.

Finally Aaron pulled out of him, muttering, "This will do." He let go of John's head, and pushed him to lay down on the bed. Hands slid under his knees, pulling them up and spreading them to either side of John, not a favored position. "Leslie," he gasped out, as little tendrils of panic started to ebb their way into his mind. He was hesitant to push back, a childhood memory of having his wrists pinned down on either side of his head flashing in his mind. "Leslie, wait, ummm...I'm not okay with this."

"Not okay with what?" Aaron asked him, and John picked right up on the tinge of annoyance in it.

"This, this this," John stuttered over trying to find the right words in the heat of a moment he didn't want to mess up. "I can't be bottom, can't be, can't be..."

"Well, you don't act like a top, baby. I just assumed you'd be the catcher."

"No, I can, I just, this, this won't work," he gestured a little frantically between them, scared his meaning was lost. Things were different when it was Lafayette; Lafayette knew how to read him, Lafayette knew when to get off him, and John was starting to feel claustrophobic as he lay exposed under Aaron's body. John tried to wiggle free, to get out from under the male looming over him, his mind reeling with little flashes of childhood trauma. Aaron chuckled as if he were amused, tho John couldn't see what in the situation was so amusing.

"Hey, hey," Aaron's voice was suddenly soft and soothing; or was it always soft and soothing? "It's okay. Someone didn't treat you right, did they baby?" He stroked at John's face, smiling sickly sweet in a way that made John nervous and excited and dizzy all at once. "It's okay baby, you can trust me. You wanna try another position? That's okay with me, just as long as you're letting me put it in your ass."

"You ever...try it the other way around?" John asked, but he knew what the answer would be before Aaron replied as he chuckled coolly at John.

"No."

"Heh, well...good thing I've had some practice being the bottom then."

"Lucky you. What position you want me to fuck you in?"

John shifted a bit where he lay, thinking that over. He thought of all the ways he had loved getting fucked by Lafayette, the ways he'd thought about how Lin would take him...but, he felt like he shouldn't stay in his safe little bubble of comfort for this; hell he was already well outside it anyway, maybe he should just push hard into something that made him uncomfortable and see what happened. John wanted to push himself, wanted to experience something new. He drew one leg closer to himself and rolled over on his side, setting up on all fours. His heart pounded in his ears and his arms trembled, memories of the holier-then-thou-aren't-bastard that had delighted in putting him in this very position every time he'd raped John flooding his mind. He'd never liked this position. It felt degrading, it made him feel filthy...And John wanted to take it back, take away the power it had over him, take it away from the memories of the man that had put him into this position to hurt him, over and over and over. He shivered as he felt Aaron's hands slide down his back, one of them slapping hard on the flesh of his rump. He bit his lip even tho it didn't stop the little involuntary whimper he gave to the small smack of pain. One of Aaron's hands reached around his hip and found his cock, stroking it back to attention, and the other found it's way to the dildo John still held between his cheeks.

He moaned lightly as the rubber toy was thrust in and out of him a few times, then was finally removed. He bucked into the hand that encompassed his shaft, biting his lip as he felt it slide over him, working to keep him erect. Eventually Aaron stopped stroking him and John gave a high moan of protest. Hands on his hips steadied his need to thrust, and eventually a new sensation could be felt as his hips were guided backwards to meet Aaron's. He could feel the cock brush against his ass, and he tried not to tense up, knowing that would only hurt him. He began to lower his chest without realizing it, the way he'd been trained too respond, for better access when Aaron wrapped an arm around his chest and pulled him back up off of his hands. "Impale yourself on me, John," he demanded, "I want to feel you sink down on me slowly."

John nodded and reached between himself to positioned the penis brushing against his ass, guiding it in, feeling Aaron penetrate him and slowly slip further into his cavity. He brought his hand around to stroke himself, gasping as the other's hand brushed over a nipple then returned to pinch and roll it's perky little nib between it's fingers. John tilted his head to the side, and pulled his hair away to give Aaron access to his neck, allowing the other to bite and kiss and lick as he pleased. A hand firmly on his hip kept him from from bucking right away, seeking out the friction he wanted, but after sliding as far as he could go and taking a moment to just feel how good and tight John felt hugging his cock, Aaron eventually pulled out some and began to thrust into him.

"Yes," John gasped as he felt Aaron move in and out of him. His own erection throbbed and he squeezed it trying to keep from cumming too soon. He grinded with the other male, leaning back into his chest for a moment and feeling the solid mass of pectoral muscle that had fascinated him for a moment, feeling the rough rub of his jean fabric against the backs of his legs. Eventually John began to lean forward again, seeking a deeper penetration, looking to angle Aaron's penis toward his prostate. Both of Aaron's hands moved to grip John's hips, and with the position change they picked up some speed. He leaned forward a little more and then felt it, that bundle of nerves inside him was hit by the cock burrowing inside him and John's gasps came quick with each thrust. "Yes, yes, yes, yes!" John tried to keep stroking himself, but the thrusting made it hard for him to keep balance on just one hand, which was probably for the best, he could feel his climax beginning to build inside him. He gripped at the sheets under him, arching his back. "Leslie," he gasped, "Leslie, Yes! Leslie!"

A hand left it's station at his hip and gripped him then, giving him something tight to buck himself into. The lubrication of his own precum helped him slide in and out of the hand and the friction gave him the needed stimulation to reach his edge faster. His cum spilled out over the bed, and he cried out in his climax. Aaron's thrusting picked up pace.

"Aah!" John cried, feeling some pain begin to ebb into his groin. "Leslie, wait..."

"I'm not there yet," a voice grunted into his ear. "Just let me finish inside you."

"Well...hurry up!" John gripped the sheets tighter as he was hit harder from behind, the painful feeling growing. He was almost to a point of demanding they stop when the familiar sensation of ejaculation came inside him. Aaron gave his own cry of release, bucking a few more times into John, then finally pulled out. John sighed with relief and began to release his grip on the sheets. Blinking his eyes open he released there were the smallest hints of tears in them. He felt a soreness he wasn't used to feeling after sex.

John rolled to the side and collapsed on the bed, catching sight of Aaron already wiping himself off and tucking his dick back inside his pants. "Hey," John said, garnishing his attention and beckoning him closer. "Come lay with me for a little bit, yeah?"

"In a minute," Aaron told him as he slid off the bed. "I've got a few things I gotta check first."

John frowned a little, put off by that. "You were a bit rough," he said.

"So?"

"Sew buttons on your underwear, I'd like a little comfort."

Aaron chuckled. "Sew buttons on your underwear?"

"You heard me."

"Is that like a Southerner expression? It's cute. I'll have to remember that one."

"Are you just going to ignore my request?" John said, sitting up and wincing.

"Relax, baby, I'm just gunna get you another drink. Wouldn't you like that?"

John pouted but didn't say anything more as Aaron walked out of the room. Whatever the hell kind of drink he was bringing back had better be stiff enough to unhurt John's ass. He fell back into the pillows with a sigh and wondered what the protocol was now. Maybe he should get dressed. But...he didn't want too. The sheets felt nice on his bare skin and despite the mild pain he actually felt really good about himself. He hoped Aaron wasn't tired of him already and going to kick him out soon. Wasn't he allowed to sleep over, that was how it worked right? Then he had to do a walk of shame the following morning, or was that privilege only bestowed upon women? Damnit, why hadn't he bothered to ask Lafayette what he was supposed to do after and good fuck down.

"Here," Aaron said, holding a cup over John's head and pulling his focus back into the present. "Drink this. It'll make you forget about whatever discomfort you think you have."

John sat up and took the cup, eyeing what was inside for a second. He could smell the alcohol and decided that was explanation enough as he downed half of it in an attempt to get himself back to pleasantly buzzed. He grimaced when he tasted the weird grainy kind of texture in it. "What is this?" he asked, realizing that Aaron didn't have a drink of his own.

"Something meant to help you relax," Aaron replied with a smile. "Drink up."

John looked down at the cup in his hands and saw his vision blur. It would be the last thing her recalled before passing out.

END CHAPTER