Running out of threats here, don't sue or plagiarize me, I'm mean and I'll bite you. LOL! MIB The Series (possibly the greatest show on the planet!) owns most of these characters, Chanda and/or Delia own a few, and the rest are mine, as well as this story. Hope you like this next part!
Written in the Stars: A Destined Romance
Part 27: The Dating Game
The smell of steak and baked potatoes filled the air in Elle's rooms. She'd spent hours beforehand trying to figure out what in the world a guy like X would eat, human food wise. She'd finally decided and thrown something together, while she cooked she laughed to herself, she could just imagine all the things that he'd find wrong with her 'inferior human cooking'. 'The stake is as tough as rawhide. These potatoes look like Spudlink refugees! Is this ice tea or frozen over muddy water?'
Elle glanced over at the clock on her oven, X would be arriving any time. She quickly set the small table in her kitchenette area and went back to her bedroom to get ready. Fifteen minutes later there was a knock at her door. "Figures he'd be early the one time I wasn't ready yet." Elle muttered to herself as she fastened the clasp on her necklace and inspected herself in the mirror. 'Not too bad, probably nothing like what a JeeDangian would ware but it's still nice. He is on Earth now, he'll just have to grin and bare our sense of style.'
The knocking got a bit louder suggesting that her guest was impatient, "I'm coming Cowboy, keep your spurs on!"
'Spurs?' X thought before the door came open, instantly he greeted her with an insult, "Well it's about time Little Ears, if I waited much longer I'd be old and gray just like Z-"
X froze and stared wide eyed at the little human before him. She was clad in some sort of long shimmering navy evening gown, it just wasn't like Elle to wear anything light colored he noted with a smile, she had on a silver necklace with a few white jewels and matching earrings, he'd almost forgotten her tiny ears were pierced. "Well X, are you coming in?" she held back a laugh at his awestruck expression, at least he didn't seem to be searching for a snide remark to throw at her.
He nodded and handed her the tapes, there were four. Elle had thought of a funny way to make their first date memorable, instead of all those mushy love flicks that couples usually saw on their first date, she'd given him a list of horror movies, a classic fairytale movie, and a western film. She couldn't wait to see X's reaction when he found out exactly what a cowboy was!
Dinner started out as being a bit quiet and unnerving, X didn't say a word to her as he eyed his meal and contemplated over how sick it would make him. "You strike me as a steak and potatoes man." Elle chuckled.
"A what?" X asked, still unwilling to try his food.
"It's alright X." Elle assured him, "It's just a stake and baked potato, perfectly normal. Try it."
X reluctantly cut off a piece of the dark brown meat, it was meat?, and placed it in his mouth. Elle waited for his reaction, 'Maybe I should be scooting my chair back???'
He saw her anxious expression and inwardly laughed, he'd have some fun with this. X slowly chewed his food, Elle was still worried about whether or not he'd stomach it. It had been a while sense she'd actually cooked a meal like this. X made one of those faces that puts a person on pins and needles, wondering if it was a 'hmm this is interesting' face or a 'Oh my gosh, where's a trashcan?!' face. X finally couldn't take Elle's stares of uncertainty any longer, he gave up and swallowed, then immediately started to laugh. "Relax Little Ears, even your cooking's not that bad!"
"X! You big jerk!" Elle snapped, smiling in spite of herself, "I ought to slug you for that!"
X was still laughing hard, he did so all the way through dinner. Elle really wasn't a bad cook, it was just too funny watching her eye him every time he took a bite. "I really should've spiked your tea or something, it would serve you right for acting the way you do!" Elle declared as she got up and put the dishes in the sink.
"And what way is that?" he prompted her with his trademark sly grin. Surprisingly, he was helping her clean up.
"Like you own the planet, and you're superior to everyone." Elle informed him, "When the truth is that you're not so superior to everyone else just because you happen to be of a different species. It just makes you seem cocky and stuck up." She pulled away from him where he had put his arms around her waist at the sink.
"Oh come on Elle," he laughed, "I must be superior, at least to every male here."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Well," he began in his arrogant tone, "you're dating me. And you never once gave any male here that 'privilege'. So I must be special or something for you to want to spend time with me instead of a male of your own species?"
"You're my partner," Elle reminded him, "I have to spend time with you."
"Doesn't mean you have to date me." he retorted proudly.
"I-" Elle couldn't think of a come back to that, in truth, X had a point, she hated that. "You live to torment me don't you?!" she snapped.
"It's my one thrill in life." he teased, walking back over to her and putting his arms around her waist again, 'I win.' he thought smugly.
Elle turned up her nose at him and looked away, he'd never let her live down his little victory at dinner, "Let's go watch those tapes Cowboy." she sighed. She knew EXACTLY which tape they'd be watching first!
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"Alright partner," a lone gunman, the newest sheriff in that one horse town said dramatically to the outlaw, "looks like it's just you and me. So it's high noon at twenty paces. That is unless you're yeller?"
"I ain't yeller," the outlaw snapped gruffly, "by high noon today you're a gonna be shakin' like the end of a rattle snake's tail!"
The new sheriff just sneered and turned back towards his side kick and bronco. Passing by the saloon that had recently been trashed leaving only a few shaken ranchers and waitresses quivering inside, he mounted his horse and rode back to the law house.
This was killing Elle, she was mustering up all her strength in a vain attempt not to laugh. She couldn't tell what X was thinking, unfortunately, she had her back to him. They were on Elle's bed watching the movie because Orion had virtually clawed apart the cushions on her couch during dinner. She'd made a mental note to leave him with Val on such occasions, honestly, when that cat wanted attention, he made sure he got it!
X stretched out a little ways behind Elle and she slid closer against him, they'd been lying there for over an hour, waiting for this movie to get good. Sadly, some old western movies were put out to pasture for good reasons.
'This human actor, Mon Dyane or something, is pathetic.' X thought to himself as he watched the human speak on the screen, dragging out the words 'partner' and 'little lady'. He couldn't figure out why in the world Elle would ever give him a nickname like Cowboy, these guys were so dull, surely he wasn't THAT boring to work with. Thinking back, he couldn't remember her ever complaining that he was boring. Reckless and conceited sure, but she never mentioned dull.
"Alright ya yellow bellied varmint…" the sheriff called out to the outlaw once they had finished taking their twenty paces and spun around to face each other, "SHOOT!"
They both drew their guns from their holsters and fired. Bullets flew through the air as they dodged and fired again and again. 'Oooohhhhh,' X finally saw why Elle had given him that nickname, his marksmanship and heroics, he smiled proudly.
Elle looked over her shoulder to tease her partner about how he was just like the sheriff, shoot first, ask questions later. A real jump before you look, forget the brains over bronze, kind of guy. But for some reason, X was smiling?! He had his arm around her and pulled her closer when he noticed her looking up at him. Elle shook her head and went back to watching the movie. He had obviously misinterpreted how he got his nickname, typical.
The movie ended in the classic western way, the good guy won, got the girl, saved the ranch, ran the outlaw out of the one horse town, and rode off into the sunset. Elle stretched out and yawned slightly, her hands brushed against X's ears and she began to playfully stroke them a moment as the credits rolled by on the screen.
X enjoyed her touch and squeezed her up next to him, breathing in deeply, enjoying the floral scent of her hair. Elle felt warm and safe, emotions that she had never known around her partner before. They were happy and content and then…
"BBBEEEEPPPPPPP!!!!!!!"
"What's that hideous racket?" X bellowed, clutching his sensitive ears.
"It's the tape, it's run out!" Elle shouted over the high pitched droning noise.
She quickly got up and ejected the tape, sighing and putting another one in. "There, that better?"
"Much." X grumbled, "Why you humans insist on giving your devices hideous sounds like that is beyond me."
Elle laughed, and laid back down, X's arm immediately went around her side. "What's this one called?"
"The Wizard of Oz."
X shrugged and laid back against the pillows again.
"I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!" a wicked lady in a long black dress and pointy black hat exclaimed. But there was something that X just couldn't understand. "If she's a villain, then why does she have a long nose and green skin?"
"Huh?" Elle looked back at X then at the television screen again and started laughing.
"What's so funny?!" X demanded.
"Y-you're right X!" Elle laughed hysterically, "the Wicked Witch of the West, looks exactly like you!" Elle nearly rolled off the bed, she was in tears from the humorous realization.
"That's not funny!" he scoffed, "I can't believe you're laughing about it. You humans have a horribly incorrect perception of what's wicked and hideous!"
Elle couldn't stop laughing, she could just see X as the Wicked Witch of the West. "Oh c'mon X, you'd fit that role perfectly. Bad attitude, solitary, cranky, looks down upon others, long nose, green skin, and---" she burst out laughing again.
X had to shut her up, this was annoying, how could she laugh about this pitiful excuse at stereotyping evil?! "Elle if you don't get quiet right now…"
"You'll what? Cast a spell on me??" she was rolling on the bed, this was too humorous!
"Alright human, I warned you!" X grabbed Elle's sides and began to tickle her furiously.
"Hey, HAHAHAHA, cut it out X!" Elle's sides were sore already and she didn't need him tickling her to make it worse.
"You wanted to laugh," he replied, grinning as her face turned red, "so I'm giving you a reason to!"
"HAHAHAHAHA!!!" Elle couldn't stand it anymore, she kicked and swatted at him but she couldn't shake him off, "I mean it X, lay off! HAHAHA!!!!"
The more she fought the harder he tickled her, she raised her arms to bat him away and he tickled her underarms causing her to shriek with laughter…this was fun!
"X!!! You had better hope that JeeDangians aren't ticklish cause I'm gonna--"
"You're gonna what?" he teased, flicking off her shoes and reaching out to tickle her feet.
"DON'T!!!" she squealed and started laughing harder. She had to get him to stop, her sides felt like they were going to split open, she looked up at him, searching for what might be his most ticklish area. 'Hmm…he's got a pretty big neck?'
"HEY!" X screamed when Elle brought her hand around and tickled the back of his neck. "So you wanna play like that huh human?!"
X brought his free hand up to Elle's neck, it looked like a game of Twister on Elle's bed, but without the mat. "HAHAHAHAHA!!!! NO FAIR!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!" she tickled him harder, wondering how long it would take someone to hear all the racket and charge in.
Elle was on the verge of laughing herself to death, X was laughing too but he looked like he had a good twenty minutes of restraint left in him. "OKAY COWBOY, YOU WIN AGAIN!"
"That's nice." he chuckled and continued to tickle her silly.
'I don't believe this!' Elle thought, a little annoyed, a little amused, 'He's relentless!'
She had to think quick, she was gonna need a lot of muscle relaxers after this date! Finally an idea occurred to her, she pulled forward on X, using the hand she was tickling his neck with, and brought his lips to hers. The tickling finally stopped, 'hallelujah!' And even better, they were now locked in a passionate kiss. 'Does this mean he's won three times tonight?' Elle puzzled, 'This has got to be some kind of record for him.'
Elle felt his tongue slip into her mouth, 'What's he doing?' she mused, 'Trying to clean my tonsils?' They missed almost the entire movie due to their little make out session. Another shrill whine from the VCR got their attention and while X muttered profanity at the machine Elle laughed and inserted another tape. 'The Thirst for Blood' one of the latest horror movie releases. A vampire movie full of seduction and terror, now why had she put that one of the list?
"I vant to suck your blood my pet…" the lead vampire purred to his latest captive. He had her locked away high in a tower filled with bats and a coffin at the far end of the cob web decorated room.
"No, you killed Ramón!" the heroine cried, "You're some horrible creature of the night! Stay away from me, you…you…creature of the night!"
Despite all her efforts the young woman was falling victim to his alluring spell, completed by his glowering red eyes that illuminated the dimly lit room. She backed up into a large candle holder and took it in her hands, "Don't come near me or I'll--"
The creature lunged forward, grabbing the woman's throat and holding her firmly, "Now my dear, you'll share the same fate as your love. And then you'll join me! As a fellow creature of the night, and soon my dark kingdom will consume the Earth. No one shall stand in my way!!!"
'What a terrible actor,' Elle sighed. She snuggled up against X anyway. He was breathing softly and had his arms around her yet again, only this time, she had her head on his chest.
X's heartbeat never wavered as the vampire bared his long, sharp fangs and plunged them into the woman's neck. He drew back a moment later, blood oozing down the sides of his pasty white lips.
Elle jumped when she heard something behind her. It was loud and a bit rasping, then it got deeper and broken. 'Oh perfect,' Elle thought rolling over, 'X is snoring!'
She elbowed him and slapped his face, not too hard. "X!" she hissed, "Wake up! You're snoring!"
He pulled her closer and rolled over, sending Elle sprawling to the other side of the bed, "WHOA!! X! WAKE UP!"
"AAAHHHHH!!!!!" someone else in the movie shrieked when they went up the stairs and found the vampire and his latest victim.
"Wha-?! What happened?!" X asked, waking up and sending Elle flying back to the foot of the bed.
"Cowboy!" she shouted and he caught her hand before she fell off. "Sheesh, try not to snore when you sleep."
"I don't snore." X grumbled, "It's just your imagination, or maybe you heard yourself."
"I know I don't snore X!" Elle snapped, "I've lived in an apartment for four years with two other women my age in rooms down the hall. Neither of them ever said a thing about me snoring! And besides, I wasn't asleep, you were. It sounded like someone sawing wood."
"Well maybe if your human movies weren't so unbelievably boring!"
"Fine." Elle got up and took the movie out, "There was just one more tape anyways, you can back to your rooms now if you want. Maybe I won't be able to hear you snore from there!"
X got up and shoved the other tape into the VCR then got back onto the bed, "I had to pay to rent all four of these stupid tapes so we're going to watch them all!"
"Whatever…" Elle muttered and plopped back onto her spot on the bed. A few minutes passed with nothing more occurring between them, but by the end of the previews, X had his arm around her again.
"Jessie---" a dark, creepy voice called out as the young girl raced down the hall, "Jessie---", she was around eighteen and scared out of her wits. Her pursuer was still out of sight but she could feel him getting closer, and closer…
"Leave me alone!" she screamed, tears running down her face, ruining her mascara, "Please, just go away!"
"Jessie---" the voice continued then suddenly got sinister, "where do you think you're gonna hide?!"
"Please don't kill me!" she was stumbling through the attic now, feet away from the window which would lead her out onto the roof, and hopefully, to safety.
X was awake now, determined to watch all these stupid horror films. "This isn't scary," he scoffed, "it's dumb!"
"Shhh…" Elle whispered, watching the screen, "it might get good."
"Noooo!!!!" the girl screamed as the homicidal killer sprang up through the floor, jabbing the end of a long dagger into her as he did.
Elle leaned back against X as the poor girl was sliced to bits by the heartless murderer. "Gross," X muttered, kind of glad that Elle was snuggling up next to him though. Now he saw why male humans took their dates to see horror movies with them. It was a good way to get close. He thought for a moment and then slyly came up with an idea to make Elle jump.
He remembered a few points on flirting that Jay had been bragging about to the Worms one morning in the kitchenette. Apparently human females thought it was flirtatious and a 'turn on' to have their rears pinched by a male. Oh he was about to learn the hard way never to believe a word that came out of Jay's mouth!
X slowly placed his hand on his knee, where the little human's bottom was against his body. Elle was totally unaware of this as the killer was being pursued by the police department and the first victim's mother.
The thick material of her skirt and her total concentration on the movie made it easy for X to place his fingers in the right spot.
"Ma'am," the officer sadly told the widowed and now childless woman, "I'm sorry but it looks like this madman's got away again."
"But you have to find him Officer McNeal," she pleaded, clinging to his uniform, "who knows what that maniac will try next??"
"OW! HEY!!!!" Elle leapt off X and tumbled onto the floor.
X couldn't help but find this funny.
"What did you think you were doing?!" Elle shrieked, climbing back onto the bed, "Have you been taking pervert lessons from JAY?!"
"Heard him talking about how much human females enjoyed that." X chuckled, Elle didn't seem as upset as she wanted to appear to be.
"Well don't believe a word that creep tells you about humans!" Elle growled, "You don't see him with a girlfriend now do you?!"
"That Agent Val friend of yours seems to like him," X replied, amused by the look of annoyance on her face. "And Agent Kay once said that he was ordered out of the LTD by one of his old girlfriends."
"He's a player X, they're never worth a dime." Elle responded, rewinding the film back to where it had left off before X had pinched her. "Val won't give him the time of day because he acts like that. So don't you dare start acting like him!"
"Alright Little Ears," X laughed and pulled her down on top of him again, "lay back and watch your little scary movie, I won't flirt with you anymore."
"I didn't say you couldn't flirt with me," Elle murmured, "just don't go around acting like Jay would. Be mature about it, how do JeeDangians flirt anyways?"
She was missing the scene again but she didn't care, "I've seen them tickle each other's ears, necking, um…" X really didn't know much about flirting on his own planet, he'd never really done it.
'Tickling ears?' Elle thought, 'I can do that.'
"Okay Cowboy," she laughed as he racked his brain for more examples, "I get the idea." They went back to watching the movie and it finally ended a half an hour later.
X stretched out and got up to leave once the tape was all rewound, "Guess I'd better get back to my rooms, won't be long before it's time for work again."
"Okay, bye Cowboy," Elle smiled and leaned in for a good night kiss.
X kissed her firmly and enjoyed the way her lips fit perfectly against his. As the kiss got more intimate Elle slipped a hand down X's back.
He didn't mind, didn't really seem to notice. Elle was laughing inwardly as she slid her hand down to his rear and pinched him, hard!
"Owww!!!!" he shouted and arched his back as she fell forward onto him.
"See Cowboy," she laughed, her nose touching his, "it's not so much fun on the receiving end now is it?"
"Temptress," he chuckled and licked the tip of her nose before sitting up and rolling her off of him.
Elle watched slyly as he got up and left, the tapes under his arm. 'What a night?' she thought dreamily, her chin propped up on her hand.
She got up to put on her nightgown and Orion curled up at the foot of her bed. X went back to his rooms, not far to go.
The agents were all asleep in their beds when two figures stepped out of the stairwell, another figure met them in the hall and pointed to Elle's door, "There she is," she whispered, "that's Agent Elle's quarters."
"Excellent," the dark male voice replied as he approached the door with his companion, "make sure that her partner follows us!"
F nodded and turned to N, "So, in which room does Agent X reside?"
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