CROSS ROADS
Part 21
Willow opened her eyes.
She was in a hospital bed...again. She could see that the sun was just beginning to rise as the sunrays came in through her window. She looked around and then she found that Xander had pulled up a chair beside her bed. He was currently in that chair and his arms were on the bed by her side with his head over them.
He was sound asleep.
Willow smiled thoughtfully and she marveled at the idea that he was truly there with her. She hesitantly brought her hand to his head for she didn't want to wake him, but she did want to run her fingers through his hair. She wanted to touch him.
*Was it possible?* she asked herself. *Was there a chance that we could really be together?*
She found herself twirling his hair with her fingers.
For a while, she continued to play with his hair. She did this until Xander spoke without moving. "That kind of feels good," he said softly.
Willow froze. "Oh, uhm, do you want me to stop?"
He turned his head slightly so that he could look up at her. "Willow, I said it feels good. You don't have to stop...unless you want to."
She continued to run her fingers through his hair. "If I stop, th-then you won't be like putty in my hands, so I'll just keep on doing this." She paused. "Yeah, that's what I'll do. I heard that this can make a man completely susceptible to suggestion, so all I have to do is keep on doing this and then I'll give you orders." She nodded. "I'll have you wrapped around my little pinky. You'll do whatever I say, won't you, Xander?"
Xander chuckled. Then he sat up, took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "You don't have to run your fingers in my hair to make me do your every whim, Will." He smiled. "All you have to do is look at me and I swear to you, all I can give you and all that I have is yours."
"Oh, that's so sweet!" Willow smiled. Then she blinked and looked at him. "Xander..."
"Yeah, Will?"
She took a deep breath. "I-I'm feeling tingly again."
He looked at her. "I do that to you? I make you go all so tingly?"
She nodded, watching him. "Well, yeah...That is all your fault, the tinglies."
"What exactly about me makes you tingle?"
She took a deep breath again. "Oh, well..." she hesitated, "it-it happens whenever you walk into a room, or when the light shines on your face, o-or when you come near me, when you smile, when you-you talk to me." She smiled and she snuggled back as she thought of the things she liked about Xander. "Oh, and when you do those frustrating pouts when you can't grasp something during the times we study. And when you carry my books, and--"
Xander looked surprised. "Will, there's more?"
She looked at him. "Yes. There's more." She paused. "It's just you and your Xanderish ways that make me feel the way I do, Xander." She gazed into his eyes. "Everything about you makes me tingle. Everything about you makes me love you more."
Xander regarded her in wonder. "How, uh...how long have I had this affect on you?"
She glanced at their hands, marveling that Xander was still holding her hands in his. She looked at his face. "Since the day you stole my Barbie."
"Your Barbie?"
"Well...Xander...i-it's not about the Barbie really. It wasn't the Barbie you stole 'cause soon after that, you stole my heart."
Xander took a deep breath. "Wow. I had no idea what I started. But we were kids back then, Willow."
"We were kids. Out hearts were open. At least mine was. And you were the only boy who ever talked to me or spent time with me. You planted a seed, Xander. Now the seed has sprouted and you're all I think about when I'm thinking." She paused. "You stole my heart, and even now, you still hold my heart in your hands." A single tear appeared at the corner of her eye. "They say that true love can hurt. I know that's true. There were days when I wanted so badly to be with you and when I couldn't, it hurt to breathe."
Xander moved from the chair and he sat on the bed next to Willow. He still held her hands in his. "I'm sorry that I hurt you in that way," he said softly. "I can't stand the thought of hurting you, Will."
"Xander, I--"
"No, Willow. It's my turn now. I guess I have some things to say to you that...well, that I should have said long before now." He cleared his throat. "I know I've done things to hurt you. You know...the Buffy thing. The Cordelia thing." He stopped and tried to gather his thoughts. "I know I've practically thrown myself at their feet and you were even there to help me overcome my fear of asking Buffy out...which I did. And that blew up in my face."
"I'm sorry."
"No. Don't be sorry, Willow. Don't you ever be sorry." He looked at her. "I went home that night, I listened to Country music, and for awhile, I wallowed in the throes of self pity. But then I found myself thinking about you."
She looked at him. "You thought of me?"
He nodded. "I did. And, well...I have a confession to make to you." He got up and walked over to the stand on the other side of the bed. He opened the drawer and pulled out a brown paper bag. Then he returned to sit beside her and he looked at her. "When we were kids, Will, I stole your Barbie."
She shrugged. "But...we were kids, and-and I've heard this confession before."
"No. You didn't. I stole it from you but there was a reason for it."
"You were a boy. It's what boys do to girls. They steal things from them because they think they can get away with it."
"I did it because I was afraid."
Willow looked puzzled. "You were afraid?" she asked. "Of what?"
"Of losing you." He ran a hand through his hair. "You see, I really liked you...a lot. And, well, what do kids know? The real reason that boys steal things from girls is not because they can. At least, that wasn't it with me. When a boy likes a certain girl, he'll take something that belongs to her. Something important to them. I took your Barbie because it was important to you but having it made me feel like I had a part of you with me." He looked into her eyes. "Does that make any sense to you?"
She thought about it. "Well...I guess that makes sense." She paused. "Wait a minute...are you saying you stole my Barbie because you liked me?"
He nodded.
"But...well, what did you do with Barbie, Xander?"
"Well, I, uhm, I--" He took a deep breath and looked at Willow.
"You stood her up and shot at her with your BB-Gun?!" she exclaimed, her eyes wide.
Xander shook her head. "No, I--"
"You used her as a voodoo doll and stuck pins into her!" She frowned. "Xander! You used her as a science project a-and dismembered her! How could you?!"
Xander put a finger to her lips and he shushed her. "Willow! Willow." He smiled wryly. "I didn't do any of those things to Barbie."
She looked at him.
"I kept her."
"You kept her?"
He nodded. He opened the bag and he brought out Willow's Barbie. He handed the doll over to Willow and watched her face.
Willow stared in wonder at Barbie. It was the same doll and there wasn't a blemish on it. The doll still looked brand new. "Xander...you really kept her?" She looked at him in surprise. "Y-you play with dolls?"
He shook his head and chuckled. "No, Willow." He paused. "I've kept Barbie on a shelf in my closet since the day I took her from you. And whenever I was feeling down or even whenever I was feeling good, I would take her down and...and I would think of you."
"Having Barbie there made you feel like...I was there?"
He nodded. "Something like that. Yeah." He reached into the bag and pulled out something else. "Do you remember when I gave Buffy a bracelet during cheerleader tryouts?"
Willow nodded.
"That was the second bracelet I had engraved." He handed her a bracelet. "This was the first."
Willow looked at the bracelet. On the front was engraved...
XANDER & WILLOW
And on the back was engraved...
ALWAYS & FOREVER
She looked into Xander's eyes. "You...y-you really do have feelings for me!"
"Willow...I love you."
She threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. Xander returned the embrace and together, they simply just held each other for a while. Willow didn't want to let go. She pressed her face into his neck and held onto him tightly. Xander had no desire to let go either.
While they held onto each other, Willow said, "Xander?"
"Yes, Willow?"
She paused. "D-do we really have to wait for the fourth date?" Then she said quickly, "Uhm...M-maybe we can still wait, but...you know what they say about practice, d-don't you?"
He moved and looked into her eyes.
She found herself gazing at his lips.
Xander smiled. "Yeah. I know what they say about practice. It make perfect."
Willow hesitated, "Well...then shouldn't we, uhm...practice just a little?"
Xander brought his face close to Willow's and as she closed her eyes, he pressed his lips softly to hers. They kissed each other and Xander held her face in his hands gently.
After their kiss, Xander moved back and looked at Willow. She still had her eyes closed and a dreamy smile played across her lips. Her breathing was steady and he was surprised to discover that she was sound asleep.
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THE END
Part 21
Willow opened her eyes.
She was in a hospital bed...again. She could see that the sun was just beginning to rise as the sunrays came in through her window. She looked around and then she found that Xander had pulled up a chair beside her bed. He was currently in that chair and his arms were on the bed by her side with his head over them.
He was sound asleep.
Willow smiled thoughtfully and she marveled at the idea that he was truly there with her. She hesitantly brought her hand to his head for she didn't want to wake him, but she did want to run her fingers through his hair. She wanted to touch him.
*Was it possible?* she asked herself. *Was there a chance that we could really be together?*
She found herself twirling his hair with her fingers.
For a while, she continued to play with his hair. She did this until Xander spoke without moving. "That kind of feels good," he said softly.
Willow froze. "Oh, uhm, do you want me to stop?"
He turned his head slightly so that he could look up at her. "Willow, I said it feels good. You don't have to stop...unless you want to."
She continued to run her fingers through his hair. "If I stop, th-then you won't be like putty in my hands, so I'll just keep on doing this." She paused. "Yeah, that's what I'll do. I heard that this can make a man completely susceptible to suggestion, so all I have to do is keep on doing this and then I'll give you orders." She nodded. "I'll have you wrapped around my little pinky. You'll do whatever I say, won't you, Xander?"
Xander chuckled. Then he sat up, took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "You don't have to run your fingers in my hair to make me do your every whim, Will." He smiled. "All you have to do is look at me and I swear to you, all I can give you and all that I have is yours."
"Oh, that's so sweet!" Willow smiled. Then she blinked and looked at him. "Xander..."
"Yeah, Will?"
She took a deep breath. "I-I'm feeling tingly again."
He looked at her. "I do that to you? I make you go all so tingly?"
She nodded, watching him. "Well, yeah...That is all your fault, the tinglies."
"What exactly about me makes you tingle?"
She took a deep breath again. "Oh, well..." she hesitated, "it-it happens whenever you walk into a room, or when the light shines on your face, o-or when you come near me, when you smile, when you-you talk to me." She smiled and she snuggled back as she thought of the things she liked about Xander. "Oh, and when you do those frustrating pouts when you can't grasp something during the times we study. And when you carry my books, and--"
Xander looked surprised. "Will, there's more?"
She looked at him. "Yes. There's more." She paused. "It's just you and your Xanderish ways that make me feel the way I do, Xander." She gazed into his eyes. "Everything about you makes me tingle. Everything about you makes me love you more."
Xander regarded her in wonder. "How, uh...how long have I had this affect on you?"
She glanced at their hands, marveling that Xander was still holding her hands in his. She looked at his face. "Since the day you stole my Barbie."
"Your Barbie?"
"Well...Xander...i-it's not about the Barbie really. It wasn't the Barbie you stole 'cause soon after that, you stole my heart."
Xander took a deep breath. "Wow. I had no idea what I started. But we were kids back then, Willow."
"We were kids. Out hearts were open. At least mine was. And you were the only boy who ever talked to me or spent time with me. You planted a seed, Xander. Now the seed has sprouted and you're all I think about when I'm thinking." She paused. "You stole my heart, and even now, you still hold my heart in your hands." A single tear appeared at the corner of her eye. "They say that true love can hurt. I know that's true. There were days when I wanted so badly to be with you and when I couldn't, it hurt to breathe."
Xander moved from the chair and he sat on the bed next to Willow. He still held her hands in his. "I'm sorry that I hurt you in that way," he said softly. "I can't stand the thought of hurting you, Will."
"Xander, I--"
"No, Willow. It's my turn now. I guess I have some things to say to you that...well, that I should have said long before now." He cleared his throat. "I know I've done things to hurt you. You know...the Buffy thing. The Cordelia thing." He stopped and tried to gather his thoughts. "I know I've practically thrown myself at their feet and you were even there to help me overcome my fear of asking Buffy out...which I did. And that blew up in my face."
"I'm sorry."
"No. Don't be sorry, Willow. Don't you ever be sorry." He looked at her. "I went home that night, I listened to Country music, and for awhile, I wallowed in the throes of self pity. But then I found myself thinking about you."
She looked at him. "You thought of me?"
He nodded. "I did. And, well...I have a confession to make to you." He got up and walked over to the stand on the other side of the bed. He opened the drawer and pulled out a brown paper bag. Then he returned to sit beside her and he looked at her. "When we were kids, Will, I stole your Barbie."
She shrugged. "But...we were kids, and-and I've heard this confession before."
"No. You didn't. I stole it from you but there was a reason for it."
"You were a boy. It's what boys do to girls. They steal things from them because they think they can get away with it."
"I did it because I was afraid."
Willow looked puzzled. "You were afraid?" she asked. "Of what?"
"Of losing you." He ran a hand through his hair. "You see, I really liked you...a lot. And, well, what do kids know? The real reason that boys steal things from girls is not because they can. At least, that wasn't it with me. When a boy likes a certain girl, he'll take something that belongs to her. Something important to them. I took your Barbie because it was important to you but having it made me feel like I had a part of you with me." He looked into her eyes. "Does that make any sense to you?"
She thought about it. "Well...I guess that makes sense." She paused. "Wait a minute...are you saying you stole my Barbie because you liked me?"
He nodded.
"But...well, what did you do with Barbie, Xander?"
"Well, I, uhm, I--" He took a deep breath and looked at Willow.
"You stood her up and shot at her with your BB-Gun?!" she exclaimed, her eyes wide.
Xander shook her head. "No, I--"
"You used her as a voodoo doll and stuck pins into her!" She frowned. "Xander! You used her as a science project a-and dismembered her! How could you?!"
Xander put a finger to her lips and he shushed her. "Willow! Willow." He smiled wryly. "I didn't do any of those things to Barbie."
She looked at him.
"I kept her."
"You kept her?"
He nodded. He opened the bag and he brought out Willow's Barbie. He handed the doll over to Willow and watched her face.
Willow stared in wonder at Barbie. It was the same doll and there wasn't a blemish on it. The doll still looked brand new. "Xander...you really kept her?" She looked at him in surprise. "Y-you play with dolls?"
He shook his head and chuckled. "No, Willow." He paused. "I've kept Barbie on a shelf in my closet since the day I took her from you. And whenever I was feeling down or even whenever I was feeling good, I would take her down and...and I would think of you."
"Having Barbie there made you feel like...I was there?"
He nodded. "Something like that. Yeah." He reached into the bag and pulled out something else. "Do you remember when I gave Buffy a bracelet during cheerleader tryouts?"
Willow nodded.
"That was the second bracelet I had engraved." He handed her a bracelet. "This was the first."
Willow looked at the bracelet. On the front was engraved...
XANDER & WILLOW
And on the back was engraved...
ALWAYS & FOREVER
She looked into Xander's eyes. "You...y-you really do have feelings for me!"
"Willow...I love you."
She threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. Xander returned the embrace and together, they simply just held each other for a while. Willow didn't want to let go. She pressed her face into his neck and held onto him tightly. Xander had no desire to let go either.
While they held onto each other, Willow said, "Xander?"
"Yes, Willow?"
She paused. "D-do we really have to wait for the fourth date?" Then she said quickly, "Uhm...M-maybe we can still wait, but...you know what they say about practice, d-don't you?"
He moved and looked into her eyes.
She found herself gazing at his lips.
Xander smiled. "Yeah. I know what they say about practice. It make perfect."
Willow hesitated, "Well...then shouldn't we, uhm...practice just a little?"
Xander brought his face close to Willow's and as she closed her eyes, he pressed his lips softly to hers. They kissed each other and Xander held her face in his hands gently.
After their kiss, Xander moved back and looked at Willow. She still had her eyes closed and a dreamy smile played across her lips. Her breathing was steady and he was surprised to discover that she was sound asleep.
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THE END
