The Yodeling Scientist of the Lab
Notes: Despite some trouble I've had with this series, I will keep going. This one is for Morrigan, who suggested the song while I was comtemplating it, and Dillo, who asked for something with Hojo in it.
Cid: And now it's time for Silly Songs With AVALANCHE. The part of our show where a FF7 member sings...a silly song. Today's episode: The Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
[Reno, Rude, Tseng and Elena, our Turk Quartet, stand onstage. Hojo is there too.]
Turk Quartet: There lived a man so long ago, his memory's but faint
Was not admired, did not inspire like president Rufus or Lucrecia saint
But people came from far and near for powers they wish they had
For a special cure they knew for sure wouldn't come from somone non-mad!
Woooahhh ...
Hojo: This is a song for your SOLDIER recuit
He'll get powers and eyes of Mako blue
But if I inject your SOLDIER recuit
He will go crazy in a year or two!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-eee-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yada-yada yada-yada yad-eee-ooo!
[Vincent, playing the part of Hojo's assistant (nurse!), walks onstage, wearing the classic Pokemon nurse's costume.]
Vincent: He's gone a little loopy,
In case you haven't heard.
Now get this SOLDIER outta here
And never spread a word.
Quartet: No skeptic could explain just how, nor could one have rebuts,
The method to his madness, even though he was quite nuts.
Some would stand in silence but no one dared to blab
About the curious ways of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
Woooahhh ...
Vincent: Bad news on the recruit, doc! He's gone insane and died!
Hojo: This is a song for my pregnant girlfriend
She's looking nauseous and a week past due
But if I inject my pregnant girlfriend
She'll die, and the baby might too!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-ye-dee yodel-eee-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-aye-hoo
Yada-yada yada-yada ya-ga-doo!
Vincent: The people are dying,
We're loosing our ties,
And being in this dress is
Making people give me the eyes!
Quartet: The practice grew, their profits flew until one fateful day,
When the nurse who did assist the doc asked for a raise in pay.
The doctor pondered this awhile, sat back and he did blab: "Just wear the dress, no way, Jose!"
To the nurse of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
Woooahhh ...
Vincent: Bad news on Lucy, doc! She's dead and her son wants to destroy all human life.
Hojo: This is a song for my dress-wearing nurse
He looks uncomfy, think I'd be too.
But if I inject my dress-wearing nurse
He'll have demons to tear his mind in two!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee O-layhee Oly-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yaba-daba yaba-doo!
Chaos: Grooooooowllll!
Vincent: Hey, what are you doing with that gun??
Hojo: Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo!
No, wait! This should work!
Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo yodel-leh-hoo!
Turk Quartet: Now the moral of the story, it's the point to which we've led:
When you're a nurse to a scientist you'll get demons in your head!
Hojo: Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo!
Yodel odle odle aye de aye de ooo-ooo-ooo!
Turk Quartet: Oh! Some would stand in silence but no one dared to blab
For the curious ways of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab!"
Notes: *cackles* Vinny in a Nurse Joy dress! Something for all the fangirls! (I might hafta draw that...)
Notes: Despite some trouble I've had with this series, I will keep going. This one is for Morrigan, who suggested the song while I was comtemplating it, and Dillo, who asked for something with Hojo in it.
Cid: And now it's time for Silly Songs With AVALANCHE. The part of our show where a FF7 member sings...a silly song. Today's episode: The Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
[Reno, Rude, Tseng and Elena, our Turk Quartet, stand onstage. Hojo is there too.]
Turk Quartet: There lived a man so long ago, his memory's but faint
Was not admired, did not inspire like president Rufus or Lucrecia saint
But people came from far and near for powers they wish they had
For a special cure they knew for sure wouldn't come from somone non-mad!
Woooahhh ...
Hojo: This is a song for your SOLDIER recuit
He'll get powers and eyes of Mako blue
But if I inject your SOLDIER recuit
He will go crazy in a year or two!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-eee-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yada-yada yada-yada yad-eee-ooo!
[Vincent, playing the part of Hojo's assistant (nurse!), walks onstage, wearing the classic Pokemon nurse's costume.]
Vincent: He's gone a little loopy,
In case you haven't heard.
Now get this SOLDIER outta here
And never spread a word.
Quartet: No skeptic could explain just how, nor could one have rebuts,
The method to his madness, even though he was quite nuts.
Some would stand in silence but no one dared to blab
About the curious ways of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
Woooahhh ...
Vincent: Bad news on the recruit, doc! He's gone insane and died!
Hojo: This is a song for my pregnant girlfriend
She's looking nauseous and a week past due
But if I inject my pregnant girlfriend
She'll die, and the baby might too!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-ye-dee yodel-eee-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-aye-hoo
Yada-yada yada-yada ya-ga-doo!
Vincent: The people are dying,
We're loosing our ties,
And being in this dress is
Making people give me the eyes!
Quartet: The practice grew, their profits flew until one fateful day,
When the nurse who did assist the doc asked for a raise in pay.
The doctor pondered this awhile, sat back and he did blab: "Just wear the dress, no way, Jose!"
To the nurse of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab.
Woooahhh ...
Vincent: Bad news on Lucy, doc! She's dead and her son wants to destroy all human life.
Hojo: This is a song for my dress-wearing nurse
He looks uncomfy, think I'd be too.
But if I inject my dress-wearing nurse
He'll have demons to tear his mind in two!
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee O-layhee Oly-ooo
Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo
Yodel-leh-hee yaba-daba yaba-doo!
Chaos: Grooooooowllll!
Vincent: Hey, what are you doing with that gun??
Hojo: Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hee yodel-leh-hoo!
No, wait! This should work!
Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo yodel-leh-hoo!
Turk Quartet: Now the moral of the story, it's the point to which we've led:
When you're a nurse to a scientist you'll get demons in your head!
Hojo: Yodel-leh-hee! Yodel-leh-hoo!
Yodel odle odle aye de aye de ooo-ooo-ooo!
Turk Quartet: Oh! Some would stand in silence but no one dared to blab
For the curious ways of the Yodeling Scientist of the Lab!"
Notes: *cackles* Vinny in a Nurse Joy dress! Something for all the fangirls! (I might hafta draw that...)