Bakura:
Master Backseat
Driver from the Starsand
Beyond!
By:
SpookyChild
Author's Notes:
Wowsers, I've been having some technical difficulties with this story! But, I'm hoping it's been cleared up. Chapter two is HERE! I'm actually planning to do a 'Bakura the Master' saga, so this story is part one of that saga. So, you can look forward to many more Bakura and Ryou stories in the future. Woo, I should just shut up and let you read the story.
Disclaimer: No, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do I own Bakura or Ryou. I don't own Aqua either. I also don't own 'House of Pancakes', and after what happens to our duo, I don't want to own it. Uh, I don't own McDonalds or 7-11. Oh, and I don't own Lucky Charms. Um, I think that's it.
Chapter Two: Mister Bakura's Wild Ride!
"You know what?"
"What?" Bakura snapped, mad because he had to sit in the back.
"I never finished my breakfast."
"Yeah, well, I had five bowls of Lucky Charms."
Ryou ignored the irritated tone in his Yami's voice. "You want to get some breakfast?"
Bakura perked up at the idea of food. "Hell yeah!"
"Keep your eyes out for a restaurant, then."
Bakura looked out the window. "Is that a restaurant?" he asked, pointing to McDonalds.
"Barely." Ryou replied. "Keep looking."
Bakura pressed his face against the glass. "Is that a restaurant?"
Ryou looked over to see a 7-11. "No, but we need to get gas anyway." Ryou pulled off the road and stopped by the gas pump. As he was filling the gas tank, he handed Bakura a wad of bills. "Tell the guy at the counter 'Ten on pump two', and hand him this. You can count, right?"
Bakura rolled his eyes. "I'm not stupid." He walked over to the building, the doors automatically opening. Bakura grumbled. "Lazy generation. Back in my day we had to open our own doors. And they were heavy too!" he said a little too loudly, catching the eye of the cashier. The guy looked out the window at Ryou, then back at Bakura.
"Are you the guy at the counter?" Bakura obviously asked the guy at the counter. The guy raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah."
"Ten on pump two." Bakura said, handing him what was probably ten dollars, give or take a few bucks. The cashier put the money in the cash register.
"Hey, aren't you two a little young to be driving?" The cashier inquired, handing him back his change. Bakura smirked.
"Excuse me, slave, but I'm old enough to be your ancestor."
"Whatever you say." The cashier raised his eyebrow again, then thought 'Poor guy, obviously he's stoned out of his mind.'
Bakura looked around the store, and then looked at the sale rack next to him on the counter. There stood one lone pack of Duel Monster cards.
'My little Hikari would like those', he thought, toying with the wrapper. He shook his head suddenly and jerked his hand away. 'Damn, I think I'm going soft.' He smirked. 'He'd probably be all happy and start hugging me…right…'
After being lectured by the cashier to lay off the 'wacky tobacky', Bakura walked out of the 7-11 with the last pack of Duel Monsters cards.
"Here." He shoved the pack of cards into Ryou's hand. Ryou looked down startled, then back at his Yami.
"T-thanks, Yami!" Ryou blushed crimson.
Bakura grumbled. "Where's my hug…?"
Ryou looked over at his Yami with questioning eyes. "What?"
"Just-just shut up and get in the car! I'm driving!" Bakura yelled, shoving Ryou into the passenger seat. As he pulled out of the parking lot, Ryou reached over and put a tape in the stereo.
"What the Hell is that?" Bakura asked as Ryou fiddled with the knobs.
"It's a tape of my favorite song!" Ryou smiled, turning the stereo on. Aqua's "Happy Boys and Happy Girls" blasted through the speakers. Ryou began to sing along. "Happy boys and happy girls we'll be! We are the happy boys and girls!"
"What the Hell is this?!" Bakura screamed over the music. Ryou smiled at him.
"It's Aqua! Don't you like it?" Ryou asked, practically bouncing in his seat.
Bakura's eyes widened. " Like it?! This is horrible! What are you, gay?"
"No!" Ryou cried defensively. There was an awkward silence. Ryou decided to break it.
"…Are you?"
"For the love of… Just listen to your damn music!" Bakura yelled, turning up the stereo. He looked off to the side for a minute. "Is that a restaurant?" he pointed. Ryou leaned over slightly to see a 'House of Pancakes'.
"Hmmm…yeah, that'll do."
Bakura pulled over and parked. Ryou got out first.
"Okay, just do what I do and don't make a scene. Just promise to be good, okay?" Ryou warned.
Bakura started walking towards the door. "Damnit, I know! I'm not five!"
"Just making sure!"
Bakura grumbled, but followed. A waitress greeted them as soon as they entered.
"Hello, and welcome! Let me show y'all to a seat!" She greeted with a southern accent. Ryou and Bakura followed her to a small booth in the corner. "Here's you two's menus! Now, can I get you something to drink?"
Ryou scanned the menu briefly. "I'll take an iced tea, unsweetened, please."
"And for you?"
Bakura set the menu down. "Anything with alcohol."
The waitress stared blankly at him, then turned to Ryou. "Is he kidding?"
Ryou kicked Bakura under the table and smiled at the waitress.
"Yes, he is. He'll take coffee-", he stopped and noticed Bakura, who was using the napkin holder to spy on the people behind them, and added quickly, "-decaf, please." She smiled, jotted down their drinks and left.
Bakura put the napkin holder down and started tapping his fingers on the table. "If this is the 'House of Pancakes', how come I can't eat the walls?"
Ryou sighed and put his head in his hands. "Why must you be so difficult?"
"I'm not being difficult! This is faulty advertising!"
"It is not faulty advertising! You just like to be difficult! Now be quiet, the waitress is back."
The waitress smiled as she approached. "One iced tea, unsweetened, for cutie pie-", she set the iced tea in front of Ryou,
"-and one coffee, decaf, for sweet cheeks over here." She laid the coffee in front of Bakura.
Bakura's face turned red with anger. "What did you call me-?"
Ryou interrupted. "Just be quiet and drink you coffee, sweet cheeks."
"Why don't you shut your mouth, cutie pie?" Bakura snapped back. The waitress smiled.
"So, are y'all twins?"
"No." Bakura said from behind his menu.
"Really? Are y'all brothers?"
"No."
"Seriously? So what are you guys?" the waitress asked, confused.
Bakura put down his menu and thought of the right way to put what they 'were'.
"We're soul mates." He concluded.
Ryou started choking on his tea.
"Oh, so that's it." The waitress said, raising her eyebrow and smiling.
"Oh God…" Ryou groaned, lowering his head into his arms.
Bakura looked confused. "What's the matter, Aibou?"
The waitress grinned as Ryou started shaking his head.
"No, no, no, just stop talking…" Ryou groaned again.
The waitress patted Ryou's back. "Aww, don't be ashamed, cutie pie. I think it's cute that you two are gay. You make an adorable couple."
Bakura's eyes widened. "What-?"
"Now, what can I get you two sweetie's?" the waitress asked, smiling.
Ryou raised his hand slightly and pointed to a breakfast special including eggs, sausage and hash browns. Bakura, for once with nothing to say, pointed to the same.
"Good to get it out in the open, ain't it?" the waitress chirped and left.
The two boys were silent for a while. Ryou lifted his head slightly.
"Yami?"
"Yes?"
"From now on, you don't get to talk to people, okay?"
Their food arrived rather quickly, and they downed it within minutes. The thing that bothered Bakura the most was that whenever that waitress passed them, she would smile strangely.
"Let's hurry up and get out of here." Bakura whispered to Ryou, who was putting money on the table. Ryou nodded. Just then, that damn waitress showed up.
"Can I top ya' off, hon?" she asked Bakura, holding a coffee pot.
"No thanks." He replied, starting to get up. All of a sudden, a fat, greasy man showed up behind the waitress holding a deep fryer with hash browns in it.
"More hash browns, sugar?" He asked, smiling evilly.
Ryou and Bakura's eyes widened in horror.
"No!" They screamed in unison, turned and ran out of the 'House of Pancakes'. They jumped into the car.
"God, that was freaky. Remind me never to eat at the 'House of Pancakes' again!" Ryou shrieked.
"For once, you and I agree, my girly-little Aibou!" Bakura smiled excitedly. This was more fun that he thought! They slowed and stopped at a red light. Bakura casually looked over to the side and saw the guy in the car next to him was laughing at something. In fact, he was laughing at them! Bakura rolled down his window.
"Hey, what're laughing at, Ass?" Bakura called to the driver. The driver also rolled down his window.
"That crappy thing you're driving!" he taunted. "Bet you can't drag race in that!"
"Oh yeah?" Bakura leaned out his window a little.
"Yeah! I challenge you!"
Ryou touched his Yami's shoulder. "I don't know, Yami…"
The driver started laughing again. "What are you, gay?!"
Bakura's face reddened in anger. "Strap yourself in, Aibou! I accept!"
The car driver grinned and pressed on the gas.
"Hey! CHEATER!" Bakura screamed, hanging out the window. He dropped back down in his seat, buckling his seat belt. "Okay, Aibou, let's see how much juice we got in this baby! MWAHAHAHA!" Bakura laughed evilly and pressed down on the gas and began trailing the other car. Ryou shrieked as he was thrown back in his seat.
"Yami, this is illegal!"
"Oh, come on! Just enjoy yourself!" Bakura yelled happily. He pulled up next to the car.
"Did you think you would actually win?" Bakura called to the driver, a sly smirk on his face. The driver looked over angrily and sped up. Bakura smiled evilly. "Oh, so it's a chase you want!" He pressed heavily on the gas. He caught up to the driver and leaned slightly out of his window.
"Okay, you see that red light up there?" he pointed. The driver looked and nodded. Bakura grinned. "It's an old fashioned game of 'Chicken'. Whoever chickens out first and stops at the red light loses. Got that?" he yelled, sitting back down. Ryou frowned.
"Hey, I don't know what they do in Egypt, but in Japan we don't pass red lights!"
"First off, I lived in ancient Egypt. We didn't have any red lights. And second, relax. I'm not going to do anything illegal."
"What you're doing NOW is illegal!" Ryou screamed.
"Just watch." Bakura looked over and grinned. The red light was drawing nearer, and the other driver was looking nervous. When the red light was right in front of them, Bakura slammed on the brakes. The driver started laughing.
"HAHA! YOU LOSE! I WIN! I KNEW YOU GUYS WOULD CHICKEN OUT! I-!" Then he crashed into oncoming traffic. Ryou and Bakura both looked at each other and cracked up. The light turned green, and Bakura calmly turned left.
"Well", Ryou began, catching his breath, "Mister Bakura, although your wild ride was humorous, I trust there will be no more drag races in the future."
Bakura grinned at him. "Never you fear, for 'Mister Bakura' has officially retired from the drag racing business."
Ryou laughed and looked out the window. "Man", he said, noticing their surroundings, "We are so lost."
-----------------
(A/N)
Woo boy! End of chapter two! What will happen next? Let me give you some hints:
Laundry Mat ("Fabric softener is ten cents extra?")
Blood Drive ("They asked me if I was gay!")
Police Pursuit ("Yami, we do not need car chase music!")
And much, much more! Stay tuned for Chapter Three; "We Don't Swing That Way."
Until the future happens (which it often does), LOVE, PEACE, and other such concepts.