Flint walked into the bar in a town located a few miles away from the G.I.
JOE headquarters. He had earlier received a mysterious phone call, and the
caller had told him to meet two of his friends at the local bar. Flint did
not know what to expect, but the anonymous caller hinted that he would soon
learn what had happened to cause the JOE women to behave so strangely.
After buying a beer, Flint settled down at a table near the corner. He had just begun to drink when he was startled by the sight of Tomax and Xamot walking through the door and approaching his table!
"What the hell!" Flint muttered. Was it some kind of a setup?
Flint gently felt his pistol, tucked beneath his waistband. Just in case.
"Good evening, Flint," Tomax said.
"We have--," Xamot said.
"--Much to discuss," Tomax said.
"No kidding?" Flint said as the Crimson Twins took a seat at the small table. The twins took seats on either side of Flint.
"We have a proposition--" Xamot said.
"--You might be interested in," Tomax said.
"Well, guess what? I don't do business with Cobra creeps," Flint snarled.
Both twins shoved pistols into Flint's belly from under the table.
"Ah, testy, aren't we? We can't help you-" Tomax said.
"--If we have to kill you first," Xamot said.
"Okay, fine. But could you at least stop finishing each other's sentences? It's driving me up the wall," Flint complained.
"Do you have-" Tomax said.
"--A problem with-" Xamot said.
"--The way-" Tomax said.
"--We talk?" both twins said in unison.
"Yes, goddamnit! I have a problem. You guys are a couple of freaks! Now can we please get to the point?"
"We know what-" Tomax said.
"-Is going on in G.I. JOE headquarters," Xamot said.
"You know about Duke?" Flint said. It had only been two days. The news must have spread fast if Cobra already knew about the whole mess.
The twins nodded.
"We can offer you answers," Tomax said.
"Yeah? What's the catch?"
"Join Cobra," both twins said in unison.
Flint's eyes nearly popped out. Was this some kind of crazy dream?
"Join Cobra?" Flint said, incredulous.
"We're looking to kill a few good men," Xamot said sarcastically as he slipped a business card into Flint's shirt pocket.
"We'll give you time to think about it," Tomax said.
"I've already come to a decision," Flint announced.
The twins both looked at Flint.
Suddenly, Flint jabbed Tomax in the eyes with his first two fingers, just like they used to do it in The Three Stooges.
"Aaahhh!!!" Tomax cried, his hands going to his eyes.
Xamot, sharing his brother's pain through their psychic connection, also put his hands to his eyes.
"I'm blind, I'm blind!" Xamot cried in dismay.
Everyone in the bar turned to watch the spectacle. Flint knocked the table over. Before either of the twins could retaliate, Flint kicked Tomax in the nuts.
"Aaaahhh!!! My nuts!" Tomax shrieked, twice as loud this time.
"I'm sterile!" Xamot gasped in a distinctly effeminate voice, his hands grabbing his crotch.
"You can tell Cobra Commander he can go hump a tree. Yo Joe!!!"
Flint ran out of the bar as fast as his feet could carry him.
* * *
It was another lonely night for Flint at the G.I. JOE headquarters. Feeling restless, Flint took a walk down to Duke's quarters and stood outside the door. He put his ear to the door and listened. It wasn't long before he was able to hear the sounds of some perverse orgy, taking place within.
"Uh! Faster! Uh! Deeper! Yesss!!!" Scarlett cried, evidently in the throes of passion.
"Yeah, who's your daddy?" Duke said.
"You are!" Lady Jaye said, breathing heavily.
"Yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about," Duke said smugly.
"Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeee! Oooooooooohhhh!!!!!!" Jinx cried ecstatically.
"It's my turn, you big hunk of manly studliness," Cover Girl said sensuously.
Unable to bear listening to any more of this, Flint put his fingers into his ears and walked back to his room. Inside his room, Flint took out the Extensive Enterprises business card and turned it over in his hand thoughtfully.
"I'm going to get you back, Lady Jaye," Flint vowed.
No matter what the cost.
After buying a beer, Flint settled down at a table near the corner. He had just begun to drink when he was startled by the sight of Tomax and Xamot walking through the door and approaching his table!
"What the hell!" Flint muttered. Was it some kind of a setup?
Flint gently felt his pistol, tucked beneath his waistband. Just in case.
"Good evening, Flint," Tomax said.
"We have--," Xamot said.
"--Much to discuss," Tomax said.
"No kidding?" Flint said as the Crimson Twins took a seat at the small table. The twins took seats on either side of Flint.
"We have a proposition--" Xamot said.
"--You might be interested in," Tomax said.
"Well, guess what? I don't do business with Cobra creeps," Flint snarled.
Both twins shoved pistols into Flint's belly from under the table.
"Ah, testy, aren't we? We can't help you-" Tomax said.
"--If we have to kill you first," Xamot said.
"Okay, fine. But could you at least stop finishing each other's sentences? It's driving me up the wall," Flint complained.
"Do you have-" Tomax said.
"--A problem with-" Xamot said.
"--The way-" Tomax said.
"--We talk?" both twins said in unison.
"Yes, goddamnit! I have a problem. You guys are a couple of freaks! Now can we please get to the point?"
"We know what-" Tomax said.
"-Is going on in G.I. JOE headquarters," Xamot said.
"You know about Duke?" Flint said. It had only been two days. The news must have spread fast if Cobra already knew about the whole mess.
The twins nodded.
"We can offer you answers," Tomax said.
"Yeah? What's the catch?"
"Join Cobra," both twins said in unison.
Flint's eyes nearly popped out. Was this some kind of crazy dream?
"Join Cobra?" Flint said, incredulous.
"We're looking to kill a few good men," Xamot said sarcastically as he slipped a business card into Flint's shirt pocket.
"We'll give you time to think about it," Tomax said.
"I've already come to a decision," Flint announced.
The twins both looked at Flint.
Suddenly, Flint jabbed Tomax in the eyes with his first two fingers, just like they used to do it in The Three Stooges.
"Aaahhh!!!" Tomax cried, his hands going to his eyes.
Xamot, sharing his brother's pain through their psychic connection, also put his hands to his eyes.
"I'm blind, I'm blind!" Xamot cried in dismay.
Everyone in the bar turned to watch the spectacle. Flint knocked the table over. Before either of the twins could retaliate, Flint kicked Tomax in the nuts.
"Aaaahhh!!! My nuts!" Tomax shrieked, twice as loud this time.
"I'm sterile!" Xamot gasped in a distinctly effeminate voice, his hands grabbing his crotch.
"You can tell Cobra Commander he can go hump a tree. Yo Joe!!!"
Flint ran out of the bar as fast as his feet could carry him.
* * *
It was another lonely night for Flint at the G.I. JOE headquarters. Feeling restless, Flint took a walk down to Duke's quarters and stood outside the door. He put his ear to the door and listened. It wasn't long before he was able to hear the sounds of some perverse orgy, taking place within.
"Uh! Faster! Uh! Deeper! Yesss!!!" Scarlett cried, evidently in the throes of passion.
"Yeah, who's your daddy?" Duke said.
"You are!" Lady Jaye said, breathing heavily.
"Yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about," Duke said smugly.
"Aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeee! Oooooooooohhhh!!!!!!" Jinx cried ecstatically.
"It's my turn, you big hunk of manly studliness," Cover Girl said sensuously.
Unable to bear listening to any more of this, Flint put his fingers into his ears and walked back to his room. Inside his room, Flint took out the Extensive Enterprises business card and turned it over in his hand thoughtfully.
"I'm going to get you back, Lady Jaye," Flint vowed.
No matter what the cost.