(A/N)- This prompt was a fun one for me to do. A lot of people probably would have picked Robin for the, ahem, victim—and plural people did, and we all know the boy definitely has some Traumas—but I kind of wanted to explore Starfire's backstory for it instead, since TTG! #46 basically all but outright stated that the Gordanians had been bombing and razing Tamaran continuously for five years and hoo boy, that could not have been fun to live through.
This takes place shortly after the episode "Go!". I have a headcanon that Robin and Starfire were sharing an apartment for a few weeks to a month before the official formation of the team, so that's what they're doing now. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: My girl Starfire would get so much narrative focus if I owned Teen Titans. So much.
RobStar Week 2016, Day 5 - PTSD
Hands shaking her shoulder brought her to awareness. Koriand'r emerged groggily from the soft sheets and the warm embrace of slumber, fear already creeping through her heart when she beheld her mother's worried countenance and heard the distant wailing of the alarms.
"Mother?" she asked, innocent eyes widening.
Luand'r pulled her from the bed bodily, frantically ushering her out into the hallway. "Hurry, Koriand'r, they're coming! Into the bunker, quickly!" she said.
Koriand'r whimpered, hands grasping out for something to hold. She caught Komand'r's wrists as her older sister ran alongside them, and instead of pulling away the older girl just gripped her hands just as tightly, clinging to the redhead as the three of them ran through the palace.
Their feet sped down the all-too familiar path to the lower levels, down past the throne room and the servant's quarters, down down down into the depths of the foundation where sturdy rose-tinted stone surrounded them on all sides. Attendants and guards and other palace staff crowded in around them on the narrow staircase. The alarms, still faint, continued to blare, sounding their warning, heralding the coming of another Gordanian attack.
Luand'r bustled them into a corner, joining Galfore—who had a tiny Ryand'r tucked in the crook of his arm. The honorable k'norfka passed the infant along to his mother, turning to go back up the stairs and join the defense.
"Galfore, please, do not go!" Koriand'r wailed, reaching out for him.
He paused a moment, kneeling by her side. "You are safe here, Princess," he assured her. "I will be of much better use to you aboveground. Stay with your mother," he ordered, before sweeping away up the corridor.
Komand'r and Koriand'r huddled together in a tight, terrified ball, cowering close to their mother's breast as the sirens reached a fever pitch and then the tell-tale roar of the Gordanian drones could be heard above the din.
The lights dimmed out as the first bombs began to fall.
Boom!
Koriand'r bit her lip, squeezing her eyes shut. Worried gasps echoed the room.
Boom! BOOM!
Louder and closer this time. Koriand'r found it hard to breathe, she was shaking so hard.
BOOM!
The walls shook, the chamber rumbling and rattling with the impact even this far down, and dust spilled from the ceiling. Soft screams stole through the bunker. Koriand'r made a few herself. The missiles landed closer and closer, too close. They were going to break the roof. They were going to send rubble and debris crashing down on their heads. They were—
KRA-KOOM!
Starfire shrieked awake, eyes opening to total darkness. The room was unfamiliar, smaller and more modest than her bedroom back home, but the sounds outside and the bright flashes of light were terrifyingly familiar.
She flung off the covers, heart in her throat, her first thought to grab her sister and brother.
-TT-
Robin rubbed his eyes groggily, coming out of a light, fitful sleep to the sound of the rain and a commotion in the other room. Blinking, he peered towards the door.
Crashing, and things being flung about. Soft thuds like someone was stumbling into the furniture.
Concerned, Robin swung his legs over the side of the bed, reaching for his mask on the bedroom table. Once pressed on over his eyes, he stood up and made his way to the door.
The sight that met him when he opened it was quite alarming. His alien roommate was rushing all about the room, tossing furniture and other loose articles towards the windows. She'd made quite a pile against one of them, and kept running back to it to stack it higher.
All the while she was breathing frantically, shallowly, like she couldn't get enough air, and muttering to herself in both English and Tamaranian—Robin only caught snatches of words, a couple proper names it sounded, and over and over again something that sounded like "bunker".
What in the world? he wondered.
"Starfire?"
She gasped and stiffened, startled at the sound of his voice. Her wide green eyes found him in the dark, and her shoulders seemed to relax slightly. But it wasn't long before she swept up to him, grabbing hold of his sleeve and tugging him towards her makeshift barricade.
"What are you—?" Robin started to ask.
"Hurry!" she cried. "At the very least we must block the windows so the Gordanians—" and here she dissolved into a long string of Tamaranian he couldn't understand.
Robin gently pulled his sleeve out from her grip, watching in bewilderment as she attempted to stack the table lamp on top of the lazy boy she'd shoved up against the glass.
"What are you talking about?"
A flash of light outside was followed by a bellowing rumble and Starfire squealed fearfully, whipping around to face him.
"The bombs!" she said. "The Gordianians are dropping khaf'trukas this time! Can you not hear them?" She searched the air behind him with a look of exasperation. "Oh where is Komand'r?!" she wailed.
Robin glanced out the window. It was blurry with rain; there was a doozy of a thunderstorm raging outside. Very loud and raucous, but not really dangerous, except perhaps to low lying areas that might get inundated with rainwater. Nothing they had to worry about, on the second floor.
But something in the far-away look in Starfire's eyes and her breathless talk of bombs told Robin that his newfound alien friend was not altogether... there. Her mind was somewhere else, the booming of the thunder transforming into something else entirely inside her head.
She couldn't keep still. Her expression was... haunted.
Robin felt worry trickle up through him as he watched her heave back the sofa, thrusting it to one side to move it out of her way.
"Zornak threik'aa X'hal kek rashikatu sonakek—" she was muttering to herself.
"Starfire," he called.
She turned up to him with a snap, rigid as a board and looking almost ready to fling herself under her barricade. "WHY ARE THE SIRENS NOT SOUNDING?!" she yelled, her expression agonized, terror lacing through every word.
She almost lunged for the windows again, breaking off into more breathless Tamaranian, but Robin quickly grabbed her shoulders.
"Starfire!" he snapped. Gentler now, he said, "Calm down. It's just a thunderstorm."
"A... what?" Her eyes scrunched, confusion taking over her face. She racked the word through her brain for its Tamaranian equivalent, coming up short and empty.
"Thunderstorm. Look." He nudged her towards the windows, but she wouldn't budge (and he couldn't budge her either), so he just continued. "See? It's just a lot of rain and noise. The lightning is what makes those bright flashes and thunder is just air rushing in to fill the space after it," he explained.
She still wouldn't look at the window, but her gaze was starting to become less distant. More... present. "You... you mean..." she stammered, parsing through his words and his distinct lack of concern or panic. "Those awful booms I am hearing... they are not the Gordanians dropping bombs on us?" she asked.
"No," Robin said in bewilderment. What would even make her think...? "Cyborg told us he'd keep his sensors on the skies, remember? If your scaly lizard friends were back, we'd know it."
Starfire's expression was blank a long moment. Unreadable. Like she was having trouble understanding him.
"I... I had thought..." she stammered softly. Her eyes drifted, looking around the room as though she couldn't quite recognize it.
There was a particularly bright flash of lightning outside, and the thunderclap that followed seconds afterward was like a sharp cannon blast. (No wonder she thought they were bomb explosions, thought Robin in that split second.)
Starfire's whole body flinched and she gave a short, trembling whimper, clutching her arms around herself tightly, shoulders curling in. She stumbled back weakly into the sofa, sinking into it limply.
Rattling ceiling. No light. Huddled in the dark. Hands over her ears. Buried. Suffocating.
Her breath shuddered, wheezing in and out sharply, eyes open wide, staring at nothing.
Robin rushed forward, recognizing her actions and continued shortness of breath as symptoms of a panic attack. "Hey," he called, trying to break through her stupor. He slung an arm around her shoulder, tried to gently pry her wrists away from clutching her chest. Even through his gloves he could feel the frantic pace of her pulse. He sat beside her, tightening his comforting hold. "Breathe. Breathe," he told her, panicking a little bit himself at just how shrill and shallow her inhales were.
What was it that Bruce and Alfred would always do for him in one of his episodes? Robin tried to parrot some of the words.
"It's okay. You're okay. We're not under attack." He remembered nights, waking up from a nightmare, where simple reassurances and just being held would calm him down. He let go of her wrist and curled his hand around her shoulder instead. "You're safe," he assured her. "Just take deep breaths. Deep breaths, come on Starfire," he urged.
With effort, after an uncertain moment or two, Starfire shuddered her way through a long inhale. She let it out slowly, trembling all the while.
The next breath was a little less labored. And then the next. And then the next.
Robin smiled. "That's it. Thaaaat's it," he encouraged.
For the next few moments, Starfire slowly calmed herself down. Gradually, the suffocating vice around her lungs eased up. Her heart stopped pounding like it would burst out of her chest. Her shaking ceased. The images from her memory faded out from her mind.
Robin sat with her and watched her get ahold of herself in silence, feeling almost helpless. Had it only been a few days ago that she was an unstoppable ball of anger and frustration, shooting starbolts at him and punching him across the street? She seemed so much more fragile now, delicate like glass, nothing like the fearless titanium warrior he had met.
So the Gordanians were not just her slavers. They had actively attacked her homeworld. And with enough frequency to warrant sirens and require taking shelter in a bunker.
There was so much about her he still didn't know, he realized.
She spoke up at length, quietly. "I am... sorry... that I did the freaking out." She glanced up at him. "I heard the..." She shuddered at the unfamiliar Earth word. "...'thunder' and... I could not help... remembering..."
Robin gently slid his hands off her shoulders, giving her a bit of space. "I know how you feel," he admitted. At her curious look he smiled grimly and summarized, "Something very painful happened to me when I was young. Certain sounds or smells make me... drift."
Some kind of understanding passed between their eyes. You are like me, it said. I am like you. We are the same.
Thunder rumbled outside the window again. Starfire shivered, but remained calm this time.
"I do not think I much like the thunderstorms," she muttered.
"I don't think anyone really does," Robin said lightly. "Do you need anything?" he offered. "Earplugs? Mask over the windows? Hot tea?"
"No," she whispered. Then, gratefully, "Thank you."
Robin sighed with relief, happy that his alien friend felt at least a little better. "Get some rest," he urged. He started to get up from the sofa.
She caught his sleeve, looking up at him.
"Stay with me?" she asked. "I... do not want to be alone right now."
Robin felt an awkward nervousness tick through his veins, but he rejoined Starfire on the sofa.
They sat together all through the night, quietly, as the storm raged on outside.