Backlashed
By: CNJ
PG-13
4
Lucille:
I felt better about talking to my son and getting some of my fear out, but I still felt a kind of desperate pressure inside of me and it got worse at the beginning of every work week. I could see that all the women felt it.
I did my best to stay away from Gary, but sometimes it was unavoidable. He'd give me these icy smiles that made my stomach knot up.
Early that April, I headed back to my desk to get ready to go home. I saw Anne Speacher there with boxes and I was surprised to see her loading up her desk things in one of the boxes.
"Wh-what's going on?" I asked, afraid of the answer.
"The ax is starting to fall," Anne told me.
"Oh, my God, you got..." I mouthed out the word fired, but had momentarily lost my voice.
"That's right..." Anne nodded. "Along with Helene Vanner and Gloria Tarimo. Of course they told us it was due to 'downsizing', but we know the truth."
I nodded. It's because those three have been protesting what is going on around here.
"Oh, Anne, I'm so sorry!" I regained my voice. "What are we going to do?"
"Look for other jobs, I guess." Anne put the last of her things in the last box and checked around to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything.
My eyes welled up with tears, blurring my vision. I had to find a way to get more job skills, so I could get a better job. As it is, jobs even at our level at data-entry were hard to come by and it barely paid enough for the rent.
"Hey, heeey..." Anne came over and put her arms around me. "We'll be all right. Let me give you my number and we'll keep in touch." She took out paper and wrote her number and address. I gave her my number and address too.
"Keep this in a safe place and let's all of us women stick together." I nodded and the tears spilled over my face.
"Oh, Anne, good luck," I whispered. "And I am sorry about your job."
As we parted, Anne handed me tissues and I cried some more, then shakily wiped my eyes and blew my nose. I knew I'd have to be really careful until I was able to get another job.
I thought about where I kept a copy of my resume and decided to update it. I had a bad feeling that I'd have to start scouring the ads for another job soon because I knew things weren't going to improve here.
"So how's life in the big desert?" Alicia McKeller asked me over the phone that weekend.
"All right, I guess..." I hesitated a minute.
Should I tell her what's been going on at work? She's been my friend since we were in our early twenties. She lives in upstate New York, while another friend of ours, Maria Salgado, lives in Connecticut.
It was good hearing from Alicia again. She told me about her job as a computer programmer.
"...the opportunities are endless and the demand for this job is growing...hey, it's the late eighties..."
Usually talking to her cheers me up, but it didn't today. Computer programming sounds interesting.
"Hey, you took classes for that, didn't you?" I asked her.
"Yeah, it was two classes for almost a year," she told me. She paused a minute, then asked, "Is everything all right, Lucy? You sound kind of down."
"I guess..." I hesitated, afraid I'd start bawling. "I'm...things at work haven't been advancing as fast as I hoped."
"So, you haven't made office manager yet?" she asked tentatively.
"No..."
"But you went for the training a few summers ago in Fresno, didn't you?"
"Yes."
"Did you speak up, ask them why you haven't been promoted?" Alicia asked. "No point in wasting their and your time training you for a position if they're not going to carry out their end of the deal."
"I'm..." I closed my eyes a minute, feeling my stomach tighten again. "There're not making it easy for the women here," I finished quietly.
"All the more reason for you to speak up," Alicia insisted. "There are laws against sex discrimination, you know. You can sue them if they don't promote you."
"And lose my job?" I said still quietly. "I'm barely making the rent as it is. And I don't have money to blow on lawyers and legal expenses."
"Then you'd really have a good case against them if they fired you," Alicia went on. She paused a minute. "Tell you what...maybe the best thing might be to get another job, then sue the company once you're secured elsewhere. Will you at least try that?"
"I can try..." I said weakly. "I still have my resume and I can update it and send copies of it out."
"Good!" Alicia told me. "That's the Lucille LaRusso I know! Hey, I'm about to run up to the A & P to pick up a little food, so I'll talk to you soon. And hopefully, would it be all right if I flew out west to see you real soon?"
"Sure," I told her, feeling slightly better at that thought. After I hung up, I dug my resume out of box in the closet and looked it over. Mostly secretarial and...I went into the closet and pulled out my old typewriter and plugged it in.
I'd add this current job to it and try to emphasize my data entry skills with computers so any company I sent this resume to would sit up and take notice.
But would they really? There were millions of people out there and thousands of other job-seekers. And more of them had advanced skills and degrees that I didn't have.
My hands started to shake as I typed, so I pushed those discouraging thoughts out of my head, so I could make out this resume without typos.
I'd head to the library tomorrow and Xerox it and then start looking at the job ads. I just hoped I had some skills and someone would be able to use me.
Daniel:
"...haven't heard from any of them yet," Mom told me as we sat down to eat at her place. She'd invited me over to dinner that Saturday evening.
"Just keep sending them out and you'll hear from someone," I reached out and touched her hand. It was hard seeing Mom so discouraged.
I'd talked to Mr. Miyagi about Mom's problem and he'd thought it was a good idea that she seek another job.
"Hey, someone's going to see how smart and competent you are," I added.
"I am?" Mom said softly.
"Sure you are," I insisted, my heart sinking at Mom's self-doubt.
"If I'm so smart, why am I stuck making just six bucks an hour?" Mom voice sounded flat and underneath the flatness, a fearful despair. "Why was I too guileless to notice the position of the women when I applied for that job back when you were five?"
"It's those jerks that are stupid, not you, Mom," I peered into her eyes. She gazed back, but her brown eyes were so sad and troubled that my heart ached for her. "People like that are slick and sneaky."
"I was so guileless," Mom shook her head. "In the interview back then, they asked if I had any kids and I told them yes. I shouldn't have..." Tears welled in Mom's eyes. "B-but I wasn't about to lie."
"That wasn't your fault," I told her. "Anyway, it was none of their business." We were quiet as we ate, then Mom told me that her friend Alicia had called.
"Oh, that's great," I said. "She's the one that lives in New York, right?"
"Yes." Mom sipped her drink. "She mentioned flying out here to see me soon."
"Hey, that'd be great."
I thought back of two of my friends in Newark, Kevin and Larry. We exchanged letters and whenever any of us could afford it, a long-distance call occasionally. "I hope she is able to see you." I really did.
I got the feeling Mom needed one of her friends to boost her spirits...I remembered that Mom has mentioned that Alicia was into computer programming and it paid well. Alicia had taken classes for it. Maybe I could...
Lucille:
Almost twenty resumes and still no luck. And things were definitely not getting better in my current job.
I don't have skills worth crap, I thought gloomily as I caught the bus home after another tension-filled workday. Who the hell would want to hire me unless I was willing to be stuck with something minimum wage?
Once I got off the bus, I passed the bank where I had my checking account. That's right, yesterday was payday.
Heading toward the bank, I went in and pulled out my check to cash it. I haven't been able to save anything, I thought, feeling depressed at the sight of the receipt I got back once I deposited the check. What would I do in an emergency? I wondered desperately.
My heart started to pound as a rush of anxiety threatened to overwhelm me and I sat on a stool. My hands nervously crumpled the receipt with the depressingly low balance on there. My stomach clenched into that now familiar pain.
I don't know how long I sat with my head low, my stomach hurting before I barely looked up and saw an ad for a loan. Maybe I could...I've heard of people getting loans for classes...maybe...I slowly stood, slowing my breathing so it didn't sound so ragged and signed my name in the booklet for customer questions.
Once they called me, I told them I was looking for a loan for a class. I hoped I didn't sound too ignorant. I was a little shocked at how thin my voice sounded.
The teller barely glanced at me, just handed me a paper to fill out. I filled it out and handed it to her, vaguely noticing that they asked about my income.
"So, you're just making about 12,400 a year?" the woman asked, peering at me a minute, then at the paper.
"Y-yes," I told her meekly, feeling embarrassed. "It's too low, isn't it?"
"We'll see what we can do," the teller told me.
"Thank you," My voice was barely audible as I left. I felt like an idiot.
Why did I think they loan me cash when my income was squit? Of course once I got a better job, I'd be able to pay them back, but I had no way of proving that to them. And how long would it take for me to land a better-paying job?
Daniel:
"Hey...Alicia?" I said once Mom's friend answered the phone. "It's Daniel, you know, Lucille's son..."
"Oh..." Alicia sound a little surprised to be hearing from me. "Is everything all right there? Lucy's okay, isn't she?"
"Oh, yes, she's fine..." I hastened to reassure her that Mom was fine physically at least. I'd met Alicia a few times and she's nice. I just hope she can help Mom. "Well, I know you're wondering why I called...I wonder if Mom's told you about what's been going on at her job lately."
"Yes, she has..." Alicia became quiet and thoughtful. "I gathered from our last conversation that she's not having an easy time at work. Has she had any luck finding another job?"
"No, I don't think so," I told her. "I think Mom's having real problems with some of the guys there..." I told Alicia about that asshole Gary stealing her idea and the threats and intimidation of the women there.
"Ohhh, my God," Alicia pulled in her breath once I finished. "That asshole does need to get his."
"I think Mom's too scared to speak up," I added. "If you can do us this big favor and help Mom out..."
"I'm on my way this weekend," Alicia told me. "I'll call her..."
"Hey, wait, why don't we kind of make this a surprise visit," I suggested. "Neither of us mentions to Mom that you're coming and you can call me when you get there and I'll pick you up from the airport. Then I'll take you over to Mom's and you can help her."
"Good idea," Alicia said. "And I know just what she needs too."
"What?"
"A co-signer for a loan so she can take classes to get a better-paying job," she told me. "Being the late eighties, everything's going computers now and people need those skills more than ever. You're Mom's a smart lady and can learn fast."
"She is," I agreed. "The thing is, she doesn't believe it. She's losing faith in herself, Alicia and it's breaking my heart to see her like this."
"Don't worry, Daniel, I'll be out there on Friday night," Alicia reassured me. "See you then."
"Okay, see you Friday." After I hung up, I felt more hopeful that I had in a while. At last I had done something to make things better for Mom. No longer would I just sit back helplessly and watch her suffer.
"Mr. Miyagi!" I called, bounding in his door. Mr. Miyagi turned and nodded, smiling softly. "I finally got some good news!"
"What is it?"
"You know my mom's friend, the one that lives in New York and is a computer programmer?"
"Hai..." Hai is yes in Japanese.
"Well, I called her and she's flying out on Friday and is going to help Mom get a loan so she can take classes and get a better-paying job."
"Hai...good," Mr. Miyagi nodded. "Mama need to see friend when she hurts."
"So, what are you making?" I asked, moving closer. "Oh...a kite."
"Hai...want to make one too?"
"But...oh sure, why not?" I picked up some plywood from a big box at the end of the worktable. "Just give me a few instructions..."
And he did, patiently going over little details that without him I would have missed. He's like a grandfather to me and he tells me I'm like a grandson to him, since he never had any grandkids of his own. Just being in his presence is soothing.