Sorry it took so long to continue this Christmasy thing. Been busy. Finally, here come the Gerudo.
DISCLAIMER: Why don't you tell me this time? I'm sure you know it by now.
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(The camera is surprisingly close to the reporter, showing only his face.)
REPORTER: Here we are at the Gerudo Valley. These nice, young ladies have decided to let us into their usually forbidden hide-away in Christmas spirits.
GERUDO: (Sticks her head into the camera's view) Yeah, we just love to have male visitors on Christmas.
REPORTER: And that's why I'm tied to this chair, right?
(The camera backs up to show that the reporter is tied down firmly to a chair. Next to him lies a very scrawny Christmas Tree that is very poorly decorated.)
GERUDO: We didn't want you to escape. You look very good, you know. (She sits down on his lap.) We rarely get male visitors. Perhaps it's because we kill most of the ones that stray in here, but that doesn't mean we'll kill everyone.
REPORTER: You know, I would like to keep this rating down to at least PG.
GERUDO: (Humphs and jumps off his lap) Fine, have it your way. (In a sweet voice) If you are ever in the area again, though, you'll know where to find me.
REPORTER:(Sweats) Anyway, I think it's about time we started exploring the Gerudo Christmas a little more. I see there's no presents under this... tree. Can anyone explain that?
GERUDO 2: Well, it's customary to have no gifts. We do give gifts to the Gerudo King, though, in hopes that he will....
REPORTER: Sorry to censor you, but this is not going to go that far. We're keeping this rated PG!
GERUDO 2: (Totally blows off the Reporter's last words) I think I have a gift for you somewhere.
GERUDO 3: I have a better one!
(All the Gerudos try to win over the Reporter with gifts, the camera man tries to make their way over to the door.)
REPORTER: I'm sorry ladies, but I think you should let me go. I'm not here to get into relationships.
(The Gerudos get a little upset, and one shoves her sword in the Reporters face.)
GERUDO 4: Are you sure about that?
REPORTER: (Gulps hardly) Yes.
(The Gerudos form a tight circle and talk for a few minutes)
GERUDO 2: We don't think you should leave just yet.
GERUDO: Yeah, I want to give you my gift first.
(The Gerudos swarm the Reporter, who's still tied down to the chair, and each tries to get them to open their gift. Finally, he grabs one in his mouth and the Gerudos back away. Looking at the gift, we see it's wrapped in some kind of leathery brown paper.)
GERUDO 5: (Jumps up and down happily) Yay! He chose mine! He likes me best!
REPORTER: (Opens his mouth and allows the present to drop onto his lap) Um, my arms are kind of tied down. Do you think you could untie them so I could open this?
(All the Gerudo look at him angrily, but Gerudo 5 jumps up and unties him immediately.)
REPORTER: Uh, thank you. (He reaches down to open the gift)
GERUDO 5: You're going to love it!
REPORTER: (Takes the lid off the box that he unwrapped, then lifts out the contents) Eew, what is this?
GERUDO 5: Why, it's a dried dead Leever!
(The camera zooms in on it, revealing that it really is that. It's green skin looks almost brown and it's shrunken to become as big as the Reporter's palm.)
REPORTER: Uh, thank you. I'm sure I'll find some use for it.
GERUDO 5: Duh! It's a LEEVER! You know, the ultimate symbol of true love! Everyone wants a leever for Christmas, don't they?
REPORTER: Oh, yes, of course. Now I remember. (He drops the Leever back in the box) Uh, does anyone want to let me go now, or do I have to open all of your gifts?
(All the Gerudos pull apart their similarly-wrapped gifts to reveal that they had all chosen the exact same thing.)
REPORTER: Oh. You all give Leevers. Uh, I really have to get going now.
GERUDO 3: Wait a second, you have to choose which gift you like the best.
REPORTER: (We can see his hands quickly untying the ropes behind the chair) How can I choose? You all gave me the same, er, wonderful thing!
GERUDO 4: You can't choose all of us! You're supposed to favor only one!
REPORTER: (Is finally loose) Really? Well, then, I choose... (Hops up and begins to run) Neither of you!
(The Reporter and the Camera Man run away from the Gerudos as fast as they can. Angrily, they begin to shoot arrows at the escaping men.)
REPORTER: (Dodges an arrow and turns to face the still-filming camera) There you have it folks, a Gerudo Christmas. Join us later when we uncover the secrets behind the celebrations performed by the Subrosians!
DISCLAIMER: Why don't you tell me this time? I'm sure you know it by now.
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(The camera is surprisingly close to the reporter, showing only his face.)
REPORTER: Here we are at the Gerudo Valley. These nice, young ladies have decided to let us into their usually forbidden hide-away in Christmas spirits.
GERUDO: (Sticks her head into the camera's view) Yeah, we just love to have male visitors on Christmas.
REPORTER: And that's why I'm tied to this chair, right?
(The camera backs up to show that the reporter is tied down firmly to a chair. Next to him lies a very scrawny Christmas Tree that is very poorly decorated.)
GERUDO: We didn't want you to escape. You look very good, you know. (She sits down on his lap.) We rarely get male visitors. Perhaps it's because we kill most of the ones that stray in here, but that doesn't mean we'll kill everyone.
REPORTER: You know, I would like to keep this rating down to at least PG.
GERUDO: (Humphs and jumps off his lap) Fine, have it your way. (In a sweet voice) If you are ever in the area again, though, you'll know where to find me.
REPORTER:(Sweats) Anyway, I think it's about time we started exploring the Gerudo Christmas a little more. I see there's no presents under this... tree. Can anyone explain that?
GERUDO 2: Well, it's customary to have no gifts. We do give gifts to the Gerudo King, though, in hopes that he will....
REPORTER: Sorry to censor you, but this is not going to go that far. We're keeping this rated PG!
GERUDO 2: (Totally blows off the Reporter's last words) I think I have a gift for you somewhere.
GERUDO 3: I have a better one!
(All the Gerudos try to win over the Reporter with gifts, the camera man tries to make their way over to the door.)
REPORTER: I'm sorry ladies, but I think you should let me go. I'm not here to get into relationships.
(The Gerudos get a little upset, and one shoves her sword in the Reporters face.)
GERUDO 4: Are you sure about that?
REPORTER: (Gulps hardly) Yes.
(The Gerudos form a tight circle and talk for a few minutes)
GERUDO 2: We don't think you should leave just yet.
GERUDO: Yeah, I want to give you my gift first.
(The Gerudos swarm the Reporter, who's still tied down to the chair, and each tries to get them to open their gift. Finally, he grabs one in his mouth and the Gerudos back away. Looking at the gift, we see it's wrapped in some kind of leathery brown paper.)
GERUDO 5: (Jumps up and down happily) Yay! He chose mine! He likes me best!
REPORTER: (Opens his mouth and allows the present to drop onto his lap) Um, my arms are kind of tied down. Do you think you could untie them so I could open this?
(All the Gerudo look at him angrily, but Gerudo 5 jumps up and unties him immediately.)
REPORTER: Uh, thank you. (He reaches down to open the gift)
GERUDO 5: You're going to love it!
REPORTER: (Takes the lid off the box that he unwrapped, then lifts out the contents) Eew, what is this?
GERUDO 5: Why, it's a dried dead Leever!
(The camera zooms in on it, revealing that it really is that. It's green skin looks almost brown and it's shrunken to become as big as the Reporter's palm.)
REPORTER: Uh, thank you. I'm sure I'll find some use for it.
GERUDO 5: Duh! It's a LEEVER! You know, the ultimate symbol of true love! Everyone wants a leever for Christmas, don't they?
REPORTER: Oh, yes, of course. Now I remember. (He drops the Leever back in the box) Uh, does anyone want to let me go now, or do I have to open all of your gifts?
(All the Gerudos pull apart their similarly-wrapped gifts to reveal that they had all chosen the exact same thing.)
REPORTER: Oh. You all give Leevers. Uh, I really have to get going now.
GERUDO 3: Wait a second, you have to choose which gift you like the best.
REPORTER: (We can see his hands quickly untying the ropes behind the chair) How can I choose? You all gave me the same, er, wonderful thing!
GERUDO 4: You can't choose all of us! You're supposed to favor only one!
REPORTER: (Is finally loose) Really? Well, then, I choose... (Hops up and begins to run) Neither of you!
(The Reporter and the Camera Man run away from the Gerudos as fast as they can. Angrily, they begin to shoot arrows at the escaping men.)
REPORTER: (Dodges an arrow and turns to face the still-filming camera) There you have it folks, a Gerudo Christmas. Join us later when we uncover the secrets behind the celebrations performed by the Subrosians!
