Apology 4
by Colleen Hillerup
He hadn't expected to see her, not yet. But there she was, sitting on the curb in front of the convenience store with her friend Janice, sucking on a slurpee. He wanted to talk to her alone, when the time was right, so he tried to duck into an alley. It was too late. She'd seen him.
"Spike?" She didn't call it out, didn't run to meet him, just sat and stared at him until he came to her.
"Bit."
Dawn looked over at her friend. "Janice, could you leave us alone for a minute? We need to talk."
The young woman looked from one to the other, sensed the tension, and only too happily replied, "I'm going over to Butterflies Boutique. See if they have anything new. I'll catch you later." She dumped her paper cup in the trash and ran off across the street.
"You're back." Dawn looked down into the icy green substance in her oversized cup.
He sat down beside her on the curb. "Yeah. Just got home." He folded his hands in his lap and avoided eye contact with her.
"I missed you. I'm angry as spit with you, but I missed you."
"I shouldn't have left without saying goodbye. I'm sorry."
She took a sip from the straw. "That's not why I'm angry. Not all of it." She put the drink on the curb beside her. "Xander told me what happened."
"With Anya? You knew about that before I left. I thought you were beginning to understand."
She wrapped her arms around her knees. "Xander found Buffy in the bathroom, after you were there. I know what you did."
His head snapped up, and he looked at Dawn, then turned away. "God, I'm sorry. I didn't want you to know. He shouldn't have told you. It wasn't fair."
"I can handle it. I don't understand it, but I can handle it. I just don't know if I can be your friend anymore."
He expected it from Buffy. Not from Dawn. "That's fair," he croaked. He rubbed at the corner of his eye. "If I could take it back, I would. She stopped me, you know. Snapped me out of it. I hated myself more than you ever could."
"Where were you?"
"Africa. Makin' some changes. If it helps, I don't think I'd ever try anything like that now."
"We'll see." Dawn stood up. "I'm going to find Janice. Maybe we can talk later."
He looked up at her. "How's Buffy?"
"Better. More alive. Treats me pretty good. I've started training."
"Well, well. You'll be a scoobie yet." He stood up, brushed off the seat of his pants, and looked at her. She was as tall as he was, now. "I missed you. I want to be friends." He reached his hand out towards her cheek, then pulled back.
"We'll see." She started to step onto the street, then turned around. "Welcome home."
He wiped the tears from his eyes. When they cleared, she was gone.
by Colleen Hillerup
He hadn't expected to see her, not yet. But there she was, sitting on the curb in front of the convenience store with her friend Janice, sucking on a slurpee. He wanted to talk to her alone, when the time was right, so he tried to duck into an alley. It was too late. She'd seen him.
"Spike?" She didn't call it out, didn't run to meet him, just sat and stared at him until he came to her.
"Bit."
Dawn looked over at her friend. "Janice, could you leave us alone for a minute? We need to talk."
The young woman looked from one to the other, sensed the tension, and only too happily replied, "I'm going over to Butterflies Boutique. See if they have anything new. I'll catch you later." She dumped her paper cup in the trash and ran off across the street.
"You're back." Dawn looked down into the icy green substance in her oversized cup.
He sat down beside her on the curb. "Yeah. Just got home." He folded his hands in his lap and avoided eye contact with her.
"I missed you. I'm angry as spit with you, but I missed you."
"I shouldn't have left without saying goodbye. I'm sorry."
She took a sip from the straw. "That's not why I'm angry. Not all of it." She put the drink on the curb beside her. "Xander told me what happened."
"With Anya? You knew about that before I left. I thought you were beginning to understand."
She wrapped her arms around her knees. "Xander found Buffy in the bathroom, after you were there. I know what you did."
His head snapped up, and he looked at Dawn, then turned away. "God, I'm sorry. I didn't want you to know. He shouldn't have told you. It wasn't fair."
"I can handle it. I don't understand it, but I can handle it. I just don't know if I can be your friend anymore."
He expected it from Buffy. Not from Dawn. "That's fair," he croaked. He rubbed at the corner of his eye. "If I could take it back, I would. She stopped me, you know. Snapped me out of it. I hated myself more than you ever could."
"Where were you?"
"Africa. Makin' some changes. If it helps, I don't think I'd ever try anything like that now."
"We'll see." Dawn stood up. "I'm going to find Janice. Maybe we can talk later."
He looked up at her. "How's Buffy?"
"Better. More alive. Treats me pretty good. I've started training."
"Well, well. You'll be a scoobie yet." He stood up, brushed off the seat of his pants, and looked at her. She was as tall as he was, now. "I missed you. I want to be friends." He reached his hand out towards her cheek, then pulled back.
"We'll see." She started to step onto the street, then turned around. "Welcome home."
He wiped the tears from his eyes. When they cleared, she was gone.