To Rule, or Not to Rule
Written by: Cartman's Girl

Notes: Prepare for anime references, they smoosh up your head. And thank you to all who commented on the measly four paragraph opening! I love you so much! So much love to give. So I give you double!

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Chapter Two: The Plan is Revealed

"Gir!" Zim opened his front door wide and screeched out above the screams of scarred children. The little scattered bodies made the whole street look like a World War 2 battle field, ripped clothing, emptied pockets etc. etc. Gir looked up at Zim from his place on the ground, trying to chew a pencil case. The black puppy ears perked up, showing he was listening. "Get in here!" he made the gesture of swift movement to his feet. Gir yawned, got to his feet and happily toddled over the squirming in pain children, and through the door.

"Yes Master?" he asked as Zim closed the door quickly. "Are we going on a picnic??"

"No Gir, no picnics." Zim said, walking to the table top which lifted up as he approached it. "I have came up with the most ingenious plan! The plan that will give me control of this planet! …or wipe out everyone and everything on it. Either way, it'll work perfectly!" he and Gir were now making their way down to the lab through a small elevator.

"Oooooo…" Gir said blankly, either really impressed or just saying it for no better reason.

"Yes Gir, oooooo." Zim echoed, clenching a fist. He stepped out proudly into his lab and up to his large control panel. "This plan will send me into such technology I've only experienced briefly! And using their own metal work deelies against them! Missiles, bombs, tanks, all at MY command! Planes no longer functioning properly, terminals useless!" he then erupted into a well called for burst of hysterical laughter. Gir joined in, laughing along until Zim stopped. He giggled happily too.

Zim then gestured to what looked like a Air Port's Metal Detector, but it was larger and blue light was shining at the passageway. Many metal cables traced their way from the top of it, up to the ceiling of Zim's lab. Levers and switches scattered the front.

"Behold Gir, the newest and latest way of transportation known to Irk and Humans alike!" he patted it gently, "Oh you're my best invention yet, yes you are! Yes you are! Who's my big strong machine that'll bring about the destruction of all man kind? You are! You are!" Gir coughed loudly, snapping Zim out of his hugging of his latest creation. "Ahem. Yes." He stood up straight again, "Behold Gir! …my way of getting into… the Internet!"

"Wassa Internet?" Gir asked, since he never really had ever heard of such a thing in his small life span. Zim blinked, staring at him for a while.

"You're kidding, you don't know what the Internet is?"

"Nope! Is it ta catch fishies?? I wanna fish! I'll love it, and hug it, and fry it in a pan of batter! Mmmm." Gir rubbed his belly happily at the idea of having fish for dinner. Zim scowled.

"Gir, the Internet is a giant… it's… it gives people information when they need it, chat rooms to talk in, ways to send information across great miles of distance in a blink of an eye, controls many FBI and other mean and nasty organizations, and… and…" he trailed off, then waved a hand. "Either way, when I take over the Internet everyone will be lost without their access to web sites and chartrooms!" Zim then walked back to the control panel, hitting a few switches. Within a short few seconds, he had on his lavender coloured suit on. Gir was stood off to the side, watching dumbly. Zim turned to face him, a dramatic pose included.

"Today… I infiltrate every human's home on this planet."

"What if they don't got the Internet?" Zim paused for a while,

"Then I'll cause pain and agony to their brain meats some other way!"

"…maybe I can fry all the fishies ina lake of batter instead…" Gir mused quietly to himself, before getting a glare from Zim.

"No fish, Gir!"

"Aw!"

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To be continued! Will Zim's plan to infiltrate the Internet come true? Or will Dib find out while cleaning his undies and save the day?? And will Gir get his lake of batter fried fish? The answers to these questions and many more will be answered in all due time. Keep ya shirts on.

[Wow, two pages in Word!]