Chapter 2 - Inej
Inej felt the tremor run through Kaz. His eyes closed. She could feel him slipping away. She put the shears down and willed herself to still, to shrink back as best she could. But she hadn't been the wraith for quite some time, and there was little space left for her to give him. Instead, she kept talking.
"I've saved 234 children. I count them every night before I go to sleep. I could tell you the names of every single one of them. Where they come from. How they were stolen. Which ones had homes to go back to. It helps. I think. I do think of the Menagerie less. It's their faces that I see in the dark, not the faces of the men who paid for my time." She wasn't making much sense, just speaking words as they came to her. The shaking seemed to be stopping.
"Go on", he whispered. So she continued.
"I haven't told my parents about the years I was gone. I don't have the words to say. I took them back to Ravka on my first voyage. They sailed with me for the full month. They still travel, but I've memorised their route. They thank the saints each night that you brought me back to them." His eyes snapped open. "Did you hear Queen Zoya is Suli? My parents think that she is a gift from the saints. I met her, at the Palace, with Nina. Nina goes by a new name now and is betrothed to the Fjerdan Prince. I wish I could go, but I don't think having a Suli criminal at a Fjerdan wedding would be inconspicuous."
"You're not a criminal anymore, Inej. You're a captain" He hadn't moved his leg. It felt warm against hers.
"If you take this job, I will be a criminal once more" She picked up the shears and motioned for him to turn around again, this time to the side. He did. "The job is to steal the heart of Sankt Feliks" she didn't wait for his next question. "The reward will be diplomatic immunity".
The silence stretched on for what felt like hours, only broken by the steady snip of the shears.
"Other side," she said. He complied—more silence.
"Front, please" She saw him swallow as he turned to face her. He stood a millimetre further back so that this time their legs didn't touch, and he wasn't looking at her. He was staring into the middle distance.
Scheming face, she smiled to herself as she finished cutting his fringe. He still wore his hair shorter on the sides and longer on top. She had always liked it that way.
"I'll need Wylan, Jesper, and Nina at least. Possibly a few more Dregs" a slight pause "and the best spider I can find".
Inej wanted to grab him by the shoulders, shake him and scream, tell me you need me - not the spider, not the wraith, just me. But she didn't. Surely they were beyond this. She knew he cared for her; he had started, just barely, to remove his armour for her. Now they were here—one step forward and three steps back.
"You need me," she said simply. She saw his eyes flash. Did she imagine his gaze dropping to her lips? "Nina can't do it", she continued, "She is too deep in Fjerda to risk it."
He sighed. Inej knew he was thinking about how they had relied so heavily on Nina last time they had done a job together. She knew Kaz hated having to rely on anyone. Besides, Nina could practically speak to the dead. Who else could authenticate the heart once they had found it? Maybe there would be some way to get Nina's help down the line, but she was not an option right now.
"Okay - so we go without Nina. For now. But we need to get Jesper and Wylan to agree. Did Sturmhond provide any leads?"
She knew his relationship with Jesper and Wylan was tense - Jesper had said as much the last time she had visited the Van Eck Mansion. Kaz didn't answer their invitations. He had reverted to his what business questions and Wylan wasn't keen on the criminal element of Kaz's requests, not now that they didn't need it.
"No. But Sturmhond is on his way here to deliver the message in person" He looked puzzled for a second. She knew what his next question would be before he opened his mouth.
"Then why are you here?" Because I can't quite let you go, Kaz.