Chapter Two: Wasting Time…
Disclaimer: I am a rental from DISCLAIMERS R US. Let's see…ah, here we go: L, J, and R do not own…clean socks.
J: YOU'RE FIRED!
Disclaimer: What? What'd I do?!
L: IT'S LOTR, YOU IDIOT! WE DON'T OWN LOTR!!
*: Cowardly Dog
A/N: Jeyhawk is STILL the RLF. It's too late for the rest of you to kiss up now. *eating cookies from a kiss-up basket* Unless you help us get 100+ reviews for each of the remaining two stories. Then maybe, just maybe…we'll do 'The Hobbit' and 'The Silmarillion'. We're seriously considering it…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Back to Merry and Pippin…
"Does anyone know where I am?" Pippin shouted. It was night, and they were with the Uruk…guys…
"Pippin…" Merry said, trying to get Pippin to lie down.
"I'M BLIND! I'M-" Pippin shouted, running around madly.
"PIPPIN! IT'S DARK! NO ONE CAN SEE IN THE DARK!" Merry shouted, and Pippin followed his voice and sat next to him.
"I can see in the dark…" a voice said, and they both screamed and grabbed each other (no, not like THAT…).
"I'm never gonna be able to sleep now…" Pippin whined.
"Oh, put a sock in it, would you?" Merry said, and fell asleep.
***
Back to the Three…
Aragorn poked Legolas in the face with a pointy stick, trying to wake him up.
"Hey! Sleeping Beauty! Wake-"
"Zzzz…oh…you think I'm beautiful?…I'm so happy to hear that, Haldir…" Legolas murmured in his sleep.
Aragorn and Gimli: Oo;
"WAKE UP!!!!!" Gimli screamed, jolting Legolas awake.
"OW! What are we doing?"
"We're going to meet the Rohirrim," Aragorn said.
"Why?"
"Because we need horses. Shut up. Get up."
"Why?"
"Because you won't stop talking and you're still sitting on the-"
"No, I mean why are we getting horses?"
Aragorn is getting REALLY irritated. "Because we're sick of walking!"
"Why?"
"BECAUSE THE WRITERS ARE RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS! Now, get up, and if you ask any more questions I'll cut your hair off!"
Legolas grabbed his hair and looked up at Aragorn with terror in his eyes. "Not my hair! Why would you do such-"
Aragorn grabbed Legolas by his pointy ear and dragged him up, then grabbed his hair in one hand and used his sword to chop it off just below the ears.
Legolas blinked. "You did NOT just cut my hair off."
Aragorn held up his fist, which was filled with the long golden strands of Legolas' hair. "Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyaaaaah-nah," he taunted, sticking his tongue out.
Legolas' face turned bright red. Then it twisted into a deep, evil scowl, and, in a fraction of a second, he grabbed out his daggers, chopped off Aragorn's beard, and re-sheathed his daggers.
"Why you dirty little nadorhuan!*" Aragorn shouted. Legolas let out a war whoop, and the two lunged at each other. They punched each other in the face simultaneously, then both fell backward to the ground, unconscious. Gimli looked from one, then to the other, then to the one, then turned and waddled off into the woods to find his gold.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Both hiding in a fallout shelter from nuclear explosions*
J: I'd say they've gotten to the part where we cut off Legolas' hair, huh?
L: Yep. Whose brilliant idea was that again?
J: Umm…well, since we both kinda wanna live…let's not tell them.
L: Good plan.
Sample of Next Chapter: THE FANGIRLS ATTACK!
"OOOOH! Lookit the cute little squirrel!" Pippin was kicking and flailing in the Uruk-Hai's grasp, trying to get down and pet the squirrel.
"God dammit, isn't there anything you can do to shut this stupid hobbit up?!" the Uruk-Hai holding Pippin demanded of Merry.
"Nope. Not a thing."
Disclaimer: I am a rental from DISCLAIMERS R US. Let's see…ah, here we go: L, J, and R do not own…clean socks.
J: YOU'RE FIRED!
Disclaimer: What? What'd I do?!
L: IT'S LOTR, YOU IDIOT! WE DON'T OWN LOTR!!
*: Cowardly Dog
A/N: Jeyhawk is STILL the RLF. It's too late for the rest of you to kiss up now. *eating cookies from a kiss-up basket* Unless you help us get 100+ reviews for each of the remaining two stories. Then maybe, just maybe…we'll do 'The Hobbit' and 'The Silmarillion'. We're seriously considering it…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Back to Merry and Pippin…
"Does anyone know where I am?" Pippin shouted. It was night, and they were with the Uruk…guys…
"Pippin…" Merry said, trying to get Pippin to lie down.
"I'M BLIND! I'M-" Pippin shouted, running around madly.
"PIPPIN! IT'S DARK! NO ONE CAN SEE IN THE DARK!" Merry shouted, and Pippin followed his voice and sat next to him.
"I can see in the dark…" a voice said, and they both screamed and grabbed each other (no, not like THAT…).
"I'm never gonna be able to sleep now…" Pippin whined.
"Oh, put a sock in it, would you?" Merry said, and fell asleep.
***
Back to the Three…
Aragorn poked Legolas in the face with a pointy stick, trying to wake him up.
"Hey! Sleeping Beauty! Wake-"
"Zzzz…oh…you think I'm beautiful?…I'm so happy to hear that, Haldir…" Legolas murmured in his sleep.
Aragorn and Gimli: Oo;
"WAKE UP!!!!!" Gimli screamed, jolting Legolas awake.
"OW! What are we doing?"
"We're going to meet the Rohirrim," Aragorn said.
"Why?"
"Because we need horses. Shut up. Get up."
"Why?"
"Because you won't stop talking and you're still sitting on the-"
"No, I mean why are we getting horses?"
Aragorn is getting REALLY irritated. "Because we're sick of walking!"
"Why?"
"BECAUSE THE WRITERS ARE RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS! Now, get up, and if you ask any more questions I'll cut your hair off!"
Legolas grabbed his hair and looked up at Aragorn with terror in his eyes. "Not my hair! Why would you do such-"
Aragorn grabbed Legolas by his pointy ear and dragged him up, then grabbed his hair in one hand and used his sword to chop it off just below the ears.
Legolas blinked. "You did NOT just cut my hair off."
Aragorn held up his fist, which was filled with the long golden strands of Legolas' hair. "Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyaaaaah-nah," he taunted, sticking his tongue out.
Legolas' face turned bright red. Then it twisted into a deep, evil scowl, and, in a fraction of a second, he grabbed out his daggers, chopped off Aragorn's beard, and re-sheathed his daggers.
"Why you dirty little nadorhuan!*" Aragorn shouted. Legolas let out a war whoop, and the two lunged at each other. They punched each other in the face simultaneously, then both fell backward to the ground, unconscious. Gimli looked from one, then to the other, then to the one, then turned and waddled off into the woods to find his gold.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Both hiding in a fallout shelter from nuclear explosions*
J: I'd say they've gotten to the part where we cut off Legolas' hair, huh?
L: Yep. Whose brilliant idea was that again?
J: Umm…well, since we both kinda wanna live…let's not tell them.
L: Good plan.
Sample of Next Chapter: THE FANGIRLS ATTACK!
"OOOOH! Lookit the cute little squirrel!" Pippin was kicking and flailing in the Uruk-Hai's grasp, trying to get down and pet the squirrel.
"God dammit, isn't there anything you can do to shut this stupid hobbit up?!" the Uruk-Hai holding Pippin demanded of Merry.
"Nope. Not a thing."