Chapter Five: I Don't Care If You're Bent; What Are You?
Disclaimer: We are simply poor, poor students who own nothing.
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Merry and Pippin AGAIN AGAIN…
"Merry, I need to go…ah…go," Pippin said as they walked through a forest. They had walking along trying the find the Uruk-Hai, but had only managed to find the smoldering bodies of Orcs; no Uruk-Hai. They had stopped to roast some wild plants over the Orcs, but, being Hobbits, were hungry again.
"Where do you need to go?" Merry asked.
"I…ah…need to make a pit-stop…" Pippin said uneasily. "Well, I'll come with you then," Merry said (Gasp! He didn't ask a question?!).
"NO YOU WON'T! YOU STAY RIGHT HERE, GOT IT?! I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!" Pippin shouted, rushing into the woods.
"What an odd hobbit," Merry said to himself. "I don't know why I bother staying friends with him. Maybe I should just-" but Pippin's screams cut him off.
***
Pippin had rushed off into the woods and found himself a nice tree. He had just finished and was adjusting his knickers when a huge tree next to him shifted. He stood slowly and looked at it, and the tree winked at him. "How can a tree wink?" Pippin asked himself softly. "I just can," the tree answered.
"Oh. Alright then," Pippin said, relaxing a bit. "Wait…AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!" he screamed. The tree lunged forward, grabbed him, and started shaking him.
***
That was the sight that Merry was met with as he came upon Pippin and the crazy tree. "Pip! Why is the tree throttling you?!" Merry shouted at him, trying to grab Pippin and free him, but the tree grabbed Merry and held them suspended upside down. "Who are you that enters my forest?" the tree demanded.
"Well, I'm Pippin, and this is Merry, and really, sir…ma'am…um, what are you exactly?" Pippin asked. "I'm an Ent!" the tree said. "I don't care if you're bent, sir, what are you?" Merry asked. "I'M AN ENT!" the tree screamed, flailing his arms, thus shaking Merry and Pippin all over.
"It's a good thing we haven't eaten much, or I'd be sick all over…" Merry groaned. The Ent dropped them both to the ground, and they both struggled up. "I am Moss Man, old tree Ent guy, and I go by many names in my language," the Ent said. "You wouldn't happen to know Aragorn, would you?" Pippin asked. Merry smacked his arm out from under him, and Pippin went face-first in the dirt again.
"Nope! I know no Aragorn," Moss Man said.
"Well…could you help us?" Merry asked.
"Why should I?"
"Umm…" This was a very good question. "Umm…we'll give you…"
"This!" Pippin said, holding up a Lorien flower. Merry's eyes widened. "Oh, no, Pip…that's your LAST flower…"
"Don't be silly, Merry! I'm always happy to share!"
"That's not quite what I meant…" But Moss Man took the flower, and, to Merry's dismay, ate it in the blink of an eye.
"Mmmm…that was GOOD! Okay, I'll help you guys." Moss Man picked up Merry and Pippin much more gently than before and carried them into the woods.
"You must be hungry!" Moss Man said. "We have many sorts of delicious soils, and some yummy twigs."
"Um…do you have any Elanor (the All-Important Magical White Flower, remember?)?" Merry asked hopefully, noticing that Pippin was starting to twitch again.
"Why?"
"LITTLE BUNNY FOOFOO, HOPPIN' THROUGH THE FOREST, SCOOPIN' UP THE FIELD MICE AND BOPPIN' 'EM ON THE HEAD!…" Pippin suddenly burst into song and started to dance on Moss Man's open palm.
"…That's why…" Merry sighed, rubbing his temples.
"Oh, don't worry. I can fix that," Moss Man assured Merry. "Oy! Laughing Boy! SHUT UP OR I'LL EAT YOU!!!"
Pippin immediately sat down in Moss Man's hand and shut his mouth. Merry hugged one of Moss Man's huge fingers, sobbing with tears actually running down his face. "Thank you…I love you…" he wept with joy, kissing Moss Man's finger. Moss Man blushed.
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Sample of Next Chapter: GANDALF STRIKES BACK!
"No desert?" Aragorn asked sadly. Legolas looked at Aragorn oddly, then turned to the person and asked, "Mithrandir?" The man smiled. "I am known by many names."
"IT'S A PANDEMIC!" Gimli screamed, pulling his hair angrily. "What are y-" Legolas tried to say.
"*WHY* DOES *EVERYBODY* HAVE *SO MANY NAMES* ???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Gimli cried, falling to his knees. "It's too much for his little mind to handle, poor dear," Mithrandir/Gandalf smiled, patting Gimli on the head. Gimli bit Gandalf's hand. Gandalf smacked Gimli in the head with his staff.
Disclaimer: We are simply poor, poor students who own nothing.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Merry and Pippin AGAIN AGAIN…
"Merry, I need to go…ah…go," Pippin said as they walked through a forest. They had walking along trying the find the Uruk-Hai, but had only managed to find the smoldering bodies of Orcs; no Uruk-Hai. They had stopped to roast some wild plants over the Orcs, but, being Hobbits, were hungry again.
"Where do you need to go?" Merry asked.
"I…ah…need to make a pit-stop…" Pippin said uneasily. "Well, I'll come with you then," Merry said (Gasp! He didn't ask a question?!).
"NO YOU WON'T! YOU STAY RIGHT HERE, GOT IT?! I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!" Pippin shouted, rushing into the woods.
"What an odd hobbit," Merry said to himself. "I don't know why I bother staying friends with him. Maybe I should just-" but Pippin's screams cut him off.
***
Pippin had rushed off into the woods and found himself a nice tree. He had just finished and was adjusting his knickers when a huge tree next to him shifted. He stood slowly and looked at it, and the tree winked at him. "How can a tree wink?" Pippin asked himself softly. "I just can," the tree answered.
"Oh. Alright then," Pippin said, relaxing a bit. "Wait…AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!" he screamed. The tree lunged forward, grabbed him, and started shaking him.
***
That was the sight that Merry was met with as he came upon Pippin and the crazy tree. "Pip! Why is the tree throttling you?!" Merry shouted at him, trying to grab Pippin and free him, but the tree grabbed Merry and held them suspended upside down. "Who are you that enters my forest?" the tree demanded.
"Well, I'm Pippin, and this is Merry, and really, sir…ma'am…um, what are you exactly?" Pippin asked. "I'm an Ent!" the tree said. "I don't care if you're bent, sir, what are you?" Merry asked. "I'M AN ENT!" the tree screamed, flailing his arms, thus shaking Merry and Pippin all over.
"It's a good thing we haven't eaten much, or I'd be sick all over…" Merry groaned. The Ent dropped them both to the ground, and they both struggled up. "I am Moss Man, old tree Ent guy, and I go by many names in my language," the Ent said. "You wouldn't happen to know Aragorn, would you?" Pippin asked. Merry smacked his arm out from under him, and Pippin went face-first in the dirt again.
"Nope! I know no Aragorn," Moss Man said.
"Well…could you help us?" Merry asked.
"Why should I?"
"Umm…" This was a very good question. "Umm…we'll give you…"
"This!" Pippin said, holding up a Lorien flower. Merry's eyes widened. "Oh, no, Pip…that's your LAST flower…"
"Don't be silly, Merry! I'm always happy to share!"
"That's not quite what I meant…" But Moss Man took the flower, and, to Merry's dismay, ate it in the blink of an eye.
"Mmmm…that was GOOD! Okay, I'll help you guys." Moss Man picked up Merry and Pippin much more gently than before and carried them into the woods.
"You must be hungry!" Moss Man said. "We have many sorts of delicious soils, and some yummy twigs."
"Um…do you have any Elanor (the All-Important Magical White Flower, remember?)?" Merry asked hopefully, noticing that Pippin was starting to twitch again.
"Why?"
"LITTLE BUNNY FOOFOO, HOPPIN' THROUGH THE FOREST, SCOOPIN' UP THE FIELD MICE AND BOPPIN' 'EM ON THE HEAD!…" Pippin suddenly burst into song and started to dance on Moss Man's open palm.
"…That's why…" Merry sighed, rubbing his temples.
"Oh, don't worry. I can fix that," Moss Man assured Merry. "Oy! Laughing Boy! SHUT UP OR I'LL EAT YOU!!!"
Pippin immediately sat down in Moss Man's hand and shut his mouth. Merry hugged one of Moss Man's huge fingers, sobbing with tears actually running down his face. "Thank you…I love you…" he wept with joy, kissing Moss Man's finger. Moss Man blushed.
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Sample of Next Chapter: GANDALF STRIKES BACK!
"No desert?" Aragorn asked sadly. Legolas looked at Aragorn oddly, then turned to the person and asked, "Mithrandir?" The man smiled. "I am known by many names."
"IT'S A PANDEMIC!" Gimli screamed, pulling his hair angrily. "What are y-" Legolas tried to say.
"*WHY* DOES *EVERYBODY* HAVE *SO MANY NAMES* ???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Gimli cried, falling to his knees. "It's too much for his little mind to handle, poor dear," Mithrandir/Gandalf smiled, patting Gimli on the head. Gimli bit Gandalf's hand. Gandalf smacked Gimli in the head with his staff.