Chapter Eight: M.E.M.!
Disclaimer: We own the concept of the M.E.M., so DON'T TAKE IT! But we don't own any of the characters or places or things like that…
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~In Rohan…somewhere…~
As the guys approached the village, they noticed that everyone was walking around with Etch-A-Sketches and having a generals problem that every time they moved, their Etch-A-Sketches would shake and parts of their messages would get erased. They were led to a great hall and checked their bags at the door.
Upon entering the hall, they caught their breath. Inside, everything was made of gold.
"GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!!!!!!!!" Gimli screamed, throwing his arms around the nearest pillar. "Hey, yo yo yo, no touchin' the merchandise, man!" a familiar voice called across the hall. Legolas, Gandalf, and Aragorn looked over, but Gimli was too busy hugging the golden pillar. Standing further down the hall was Éomer with a young woman who immediately fell for Aragorn. Hard.
"Oh, hey, you's guys!" Éomer said, coming over and giving Legolas a high- five. "Who's da new guy?" he asked.
"…Oh! This is Gandalf!" Aragorn said. He had been distracted by the woman, who was walking around him, looking him over. "And who is this…interesting young lady?"
"Th' name's Éowyn, sweetie," she said, snapping her gum loudly and adjusting her black jacket and tube top. She pinched Aragorn's ass, and he jumped considerably, which caused Éowyn to laugh.
"My son…" a voice from the end of the hall called. "Who has come to seek my counsel?"
"Hey, da ya remember th' guys I told ya 'bout? Who bought da horses, right? Well, dese 're them!" Éomer managed to say while trying to keep Éowyn off Aragorn.
At the end of the hall, seated on a black leather throne, there was an old man wearing a pinstriped suit. He had small eyes and a thick Italian accent. At either side of him were ten guys dressed in black suits, all standing at attention. Just then, Gríma-
"No!"
What?
"I'm not coming out! You're exploiting me!"
*Gríma is picked up by special narrative powers and set before Théoden. He is wearing a bunny costume*
"Why is he wearing a bunny costume?" Aragorn asked Gandalf, who simply shrugged. Legolas looked disgusted.
"M' lord's not a well man," Éomer said. "His esteem'd time is very valuable, so you's guys'd better talk b'fore he takes a nap on yas." Meanwhile, Gríma was hopping around the Hall like crazy. "I NEED TRIX!" he was shouting over and over again.
"Sir, we need help w-" Aragorn began, but Théoden waved a hand to stop him. "I know your plight, my child, and my warriors would be glad to help you. But my services are not cheap," Théoden responded.
"What do you wish in return?" Legolas asked. Théoden waved over Gríma, and they conversed quickly. "I would like you to get your Dwarf out of here before he takes out that load-bearing pillar, for starters," Théoden said, motioning towards Gimli, who was still hugging the pillar. "And I would like you to take us in need of pity once you come into office, if you know what I mean, my child."
Aragorn blinked. "What…?" he asked. "He's a bit slow on the draw, your Highness," Gandalf explained.
"Oh!" Théoden said, chuckling. "Well, in plain Westron, you and I will be partners in business, my child," Théoden said, resting back in his chair.
"I'm not sure I wanna be partners with this guy…" Aragorn whispered to Legolas and Gandalf. "I agree. I've heard…stories…about people who get involved with the M.E.M.," Legolas stated. "The Who?" Aragorn asked. "No, they're a band!" Gandalf exclaimed. "M.E.M. is the Middle-Earth Mafia!"
"Why didn't they just call themselves MM?" Aragorn asked. "Complications with Mars Corp.," Legolas said quickly. "The fact stands, we need his help, and you must act as a key to getting it, Aragorn!" he continued. "But I-" Aragorn began to protest. "You WILL do this, Aragorn, or I will make you wear Gríma's bunny suit!" Gandalf said. Legolas and Aragorn shuddered, and Aragorn nodded reluctantly.
"We accept your terms," Gandalf said. Legolas grabbed Gimli and dragged him outside, with Gimli still hanging on tight to a golden trashcan he had grabbed.
Théoden smiled. "Very well then, we will assemble in ten minutes in the town square. Gríma!" he shouted. Yes, M' Lord?" Gríma asked, ceasing his hopping. "Your furry antics no longer amuse me. You may go back to Saruman. You have served your sentence," Théoden said.
Aragorn and Gandalf looked incredulously, first at Gríma as he left (he took off his bunny ears and put them on Gandalf), and then at Théoden. "HE WORKS FOR SARUMAN?!" they both shouted. "Yes. He was being punished," Théoden said darkly. "For what, might I ask?" Aragorn questioned. "Littering," Théoden responded.
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Sample of Next Chapter: The Battle of Helman's Deep!
Disclaimer: We own the concept of the M.E.M., so DON'T TAKE IT! But we don't own any of the characters or places or things like that…
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
~In Rohan…somewhere…~
As the guys approached the village, they noticed that everyone was walking around with Etch-A-Sketches and having a generals problem that every time they moved, their Etch-A-Sketches would shake and parts of their messages would get erased. They were led to a great hall and checked their bags at the door.
Upon entering the hall, they caught their breath. Inside, everything was made of gold.
"GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD!!!!!!!!!" Gimli screamed, throwing his arms around the nearest pillar. "Hey, yo yo yo, no touchin' the merchandise, man!" a familiar voice called across the hall. Legolas, Gandalf, and Aragorn looked over, but Gimli was too busy hugging the golden pillar. Standing further down the hall was Éomer with a young woman who immediately fell for Aragorn. Hard.
"Oh, hey, you's guys!" Éomer said, coming over and giving Legolas a high- five. "Who's da new guy?" he asked.
"…Oh! This is Gandalf!" Aragorn said. He had been distracted by the woman, who was walking around him, looking him over. "And who is this…interesting young lady?"
"Th' name's Éowyn, sweetie," she said, snapping her gum loudly and adjusting her black jacket and tube top. She pinched Aragorn's ass, and he jumped considerably, which caused Éowyn to laugh.
"My son…" a voice from the end of the hall called. "Who has come to seek my counsel?"
"Hey, da ya remember th' guys I told ya 'bout? Who bought da horses, right? Well, dese 're them!" Éomer managed to say while trying to keep Éowyn off Aragorn.
At the end of the hall, seated on a black leather throne, there was an old man wearing a pinstriped suit. He had small eyes and a thick Italian accent. At either side of him were ten guys dressed in black suits, all standing at attention. Just then, Gríma-
"No!"
What?
"I'm not coming out! You're exploiting me!"
*Gríma is picked up by special narrative powers and set before Théoden. He is wearing a bunny costume*
"Why is he wearing a bunny costume?" Aragorn asked Gandalf, who simply shrugged. Legolas looked disgusted.
"M' lord's not a well man," Éomer said. "His esteem'd time is very valuable, so you's guys'd better talk b'fore he takes a nap on yas." Meanwhile, Gríma was hopping around the Hall like crazy. "I NEED TRIX!" he was shouting over and over again.
"Sir, we need help w-" Aragorn began, but Théoden waved a hand to stop him. "I know your plight, my child, and my warriors would be glad to help you. But my services are not cheap," Théoden responded.
"What do you wish in return?" Legolas asked. Théoden waved over Gríma, and they conversed quickly. "I would like you to get your Dwarf out of here before he takes out that load-bearing pillar, for starters," Théoden said, motioning towards Gimli, who was still hugging the pillar. "And I would like you to take us in need of pity once you come into office, if you know what I mean, my child."
Aragorn blinked. "What…?" he asked. "He's a bit slow on the draw, your Highness," Gandalf explained.
"Oh!" Théoden said, chuckling. "Well, in plain Westron, you and I will be partners in business, my child," Théoden said, resting back in his chair.
"I'm not sure I wanna be partners with this guy…" Aragorn whispered to Legolas and Gandalf. "I agree. I've heard…stories…about people who get involved with the M.E.M.," Legolas stated. "The Who?" Aragorn asked. "No, they're a band!" Gandalf exclaimed. "M.E.M. is the Middle-Earth Mafia!"
"Why didn't they just call themselves MM?" Aragorn asked. "Complications with Mars Corp.," Legolas said quickly. "The fact stands, we need his help, and you must act as a key to getting it, Aragorn!" he continued. "But I-" Aragorn began to protest. "You WILL do this, Aragorn, or I will make you wear Gríma's bunny suit!" Gandalf said. Legolas and Aragorn shuddered, and Aragorn nodded reluctantly.
"We accept your terms," Gandalf said. Legolas grabbed Gimli and dragged him outside, with Gimli still hanging on tight to a golden trashcan he had grabbed.
Théoden smiled. "Very well then, we will assemble in ten minutes in the town square. Gríma!" he shouted. Yes, M' Lord?" Gríma asked, ceasing his hopping. "Your furry antics no longer amuse me. You may go back to Saruman. You have served your sentence," Théoden said.
Aragorn and Gandalf looked incredulously, first at Gríma as he left (he took off his bunny ears and put them on Gandalf), and then at Théoden. "HE WORKS FOR SARUMAN?!" they both shouted. "Yes. He was being punished," Théoden said darkly. "For what, might I ask?" Aragorn questioned. "Littering," Théoden responded.
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Sample of Next Chapter: The Battle of Helman's Deep!