Moving On
By Shelly Lee (jerrica76@yahoo.com
Disclaimer-Standard, Don't own um' never will' Check out NBC and Sorkin
It had been a week, One week since Donna Moss had left Washington behind her. It seemed like so much longer though. In Madison the time always seemed to go by so much more slowly.
She had been counting on that.
Laying under the heavy quilt that her grandmother had made so many years ago, in the bedroom that had been hers since before she was born Donna felt almost as though it hadn't really happened.that Washington had been some sort of dream.
If it hadn't been for the pictures she'd be able to believe that. Sitting on the night-table sat a picture of her Washington family. She couldn't look at it though, It just hurt to much.
"Donna, Are you awake?" Mara Moss asked as she tapped against her daughters door. Blinking twice, Donna pulled herself into a sitting position.
"Yes, Just getting up now." She replied as she managed to fling her feet over the side of the bed.
"OK, breakfasts in fifteen minets, and check the answering machine there are some messages for you" Mara replied. Forcing her still tired body to move, Donna dragged herself down the hall to the shower and stood under the warm water for a long time.
It wasn't fair, she thought. She knew as soon as she did that it was kind of a childish thought but at that moument she felt quite justified to think it. Why did this have to happen. Things where going so good and wham bam, someone pulled a block out and the whole thing fell to pieces.
It has to be this way and you know that, She finally told herself as she got out and pulled a fluffy towel around her body. She couldn't stay. She couldn't and wouldn't hurt those people like that.
She pulled on a pair of jeans and a sleeveless shirt. It did not good to think of them. She knew what she had done was right, even if it hurt now, it would be so much worse for them later.
As she finally walked down the stairs Donna was greeted by the smell of fresh coffee and flowers. The smell of home. She stopped for a moment at the foot of the stairs and hit the button on the answering machine, leaning against the railing as it played.
"Beep.This is Joshua Lyman calling. We are trying to get a hold of Donna Moss. Please have her call Josh as soon as you see her, any time. She has my numbers.thank you"
"Beep.This is Josh Lyman again. Please let Donna know that whatever happened, we're not mad at her.we.I just want to know that she's OK. Well thanks again."
Donna sat there on the steps, and preceded to listen to Josh leave four more messages, all in the similar vain.call him. And that was the one thing that she could not do.she could not talk to him now and keep it together.
"Donna, You're eggs are getting cold." Mara called from the doorway. Rising up off the step Donna did a quick swipe of her eyes to make sure that no dampness was there.
"Morning Sleeping beauty." Oran Moss said from his seat at the kitchen table where he sat watching CSPAN.
"Morning Dad." She replied as she sat down in her usual seat. She couldn't help just sneaking a look over at the TV as she sat down. There was CJ, doing the morning briefing, a sight that caused Donna to feel instantly homesick.
"You sleep OK Sweetie?" Mara asked as she sat a platter of Eggs and Bacon in front of Donna, The sight of wish caused Donna, who usually loved her mothers breakfast to become instantly nauseous.
"Yeah thanks." She answered as she passed the platter to her father, carefully pulling two pieces of wheat toast and putting them onto her plate. She saw her parents look at her for just a second, but then they all brushed it off.
"Josh called for you a couple of times." Mara said as she slid a bit of bacon on to her own plate. "Must say, we have to give him an "A" for effort."
"Mom." Donna said with a sigh. "I told you I don't want to talk to him, and I don't want you to tell him I'm here.I just.don't." Donna said. They'd already discussed this, she'd already explained why he couldn't know she was here.
"I know Sweetheart, and I respect it. I just think it's a bit harsh to just up and leave and not even tell the boy." She answered back. Donna knew her mothers heart was in the right place, just as she knew they would never tell Josh she was there if she didn't tell them they could.
"It's just complicated mom." Donna said as she picked up her own glass of orange juice, though she couldn't seem to find the least bit of interest in it or the toast that still sat uneaten on her plate.
"Oh for god sakes, leave the poor girl alone Mara." Oran said, shooting Donna a conspirator look. Mara just rolled her eyes and began to clear the dirty dishes from the table.
"Fine, Fine..Donna, When is Joely suppose to come and pick you up?" Mara asked as she placed a stack of plates into the dishwasher.
"She's suppose to be here in five minets to take me over to Hair- Today." She answered as she pushed back from the table. She had almost gotten to the door when Mara came into the hall after her.
"You forgot these." She said, as she handed Donna a clear plastic baggy. "Eat something." She said seriously as she handed the bag to her daughter.
"Got it chief." Donna joked as she stuck the baggy into her coat pocket. Her mother just looked at Donna then, a strange happy-sad look on her face as she brought her hand up and touched Donna's long golden hair.
"Call him when you get home.You'll both feel better." Mara said softly.
"Mom" Donna started, not quite sure what to say to make her understand, But it didn't really matter, as a moument later Donna's older sister Joely pulled into the drive.
"Hi Mom." Joely called. "Sorry for the crash and dash but the two little monsters are just about to fall asleep and I am NOT about to wake them." Joely said, motioning to the back seat where her three year old Darla and her ten week old Dathan where both dozing in their car seats.
Donna gave her mom a slight hug. "I'll see you later." She said and ran over to the car. It was good to go out with Joely, Donna realized as she road with her sister through the town where they both had spent most of their childhood. Being with Joely and the kids helped her take her mind off of Washington, and what had brought her back home after being so long away.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Joely asked. Donna just knobbed from her place on the elevated barber chair. She closed her eyes tight and waited for the hairdresser to take the first cut.
Twenty minets later a great pile of blond locks covered the floor of Hair-Today. Donna had still not opened her eyes, almost afraid to see what she'd done to herself, even though Joely kept exclaiming that it was darling.
"OK Kido, you're done." Mary Ann, the hairdresser proclaimed. Donna forced her eyes open and gazed in the mirror at her new self. Her long blond hair, now shaped into a short, shaggy cut was shocking but also oddly satisfying.
"I like it." Donna said, with a grin. Joely knobbed and a moument later they where back outside.
"OK, This is really weird." Joely said, as she played with one of the wispy locks of hair that framed Donna's face. "But cool."
Donna was having such a good time with Joely that she was almost able to forget about everything, but all to soon it was time to go back.
They walked into the house, Joely carrying Darla and Donna holding Dathan in his pumpkin seat.
"They won't be back for awhile. Mom has French cooking class." Joely replied as she laid Darla down on the guest bed.
"That's OK, I think I'm probably just going to unpack an maybe catch a nap." Donna answered as she sat Dathan's pumpkin seat down beside her on the sofa.
"You still haven't told them have you?" Joely asked as she handed Donna a mug of sun tea.
"They know." Donna said, not looking at her sister but instead gently playing with the babies tiny toes. "I told them before I came home."
"But you didn't tell everyone did you?" Joely asked, knowing her kid sister better then almost anyone on the planet.
"Joely.I couldn't do it." Donna simply answered "I couldn't tell them." She replied sadly. Joely just shook her head and put her arm around Donnas shoulder.
"You should." Was all she said. Donna thought about it for half a moument.but she knew in her heart that she could never go back. She had left that life behind and now it was up to her to make this new life work.
She just wish she knew how.
Disclaimer-Standard, Don't own um' never will' Check out NBC and Sorkin
It had been a week, One week since Donna Moss had left Washington behind her. It seemed like so much longer though. In Madison the time always seemed to go by so much more slowly.
She had been counting on that.
Laying under the heavy quilt that her grandmother had made so many years ago, in the bedroom that had been hers since before she was born Donna felt almost as though it hadn't really happened.that Washington had been some sort of dream.
If it hadn't been for the pictures she'd be able to believe that. Sitting on the night-table sat a picture of her Washington family. She couldn't look at it though, It just hurt to much.
"Donna, Are you awake?" Mara Moss asked as she tapped against her daughters door. Blinking twice, Donna pulled herself into a sitting position.
"Yes, Just getting up now." She replied as she managed to fling her feet over the side of the bed.
"OK, breakfasts in fifteen minets, and check the answering machine there are some messages for you" Mara replied. Forcing her still tired body to move, Donna dragged herself down the hall to the shower and stood under the warm water for a long time.
It wasn't fair, she thought. She knew as soon as she did that it was kind of a childish thought but at that moument she felt quite justified to think it. Why did this have to happen. Things where going so good and wham bam, someone pulled a block out and the whole thing fell to pieces.
It has to be this way and you know that, She finally told herself as she got out and pulled a fluffy towel around her body. She couldn't stay. She couldn't and wouldn't hurt those people like that.
She pulled on a pair of jeans and a sleeveless shirt. It did not good to think of them. She knew what she had done was right, even if it hurt now, it would be so much worse for them later.
As she finally walked down the stairs Donna was greeted by the smell of fresh coffee and flowers. The smell of home. She stopped for a moment at the foot of the stairs and hit the button on the answering machine, leaning against the railing as it played.
"Beep.This is Joshua Lyman calling. We are trying to get a hold of Donna Moss. Please have her call Josh as soon as you see her, any time. She has my numbers.thank you"
"Beep.This is Josh Lyman again. Please let Donna know that whatever happened, we're not mad at her.we.I just want to know that she's OK. Well thanks again."
Donna sat there on the steps, and preceded to listen to Josh leave four more messages, all in the similar vain.call him. And that was the one thing that she could not do.she could not talk to him now and keep it together.
"Donna, You're eggs are getting cold." Mara called from the doorway. Rising up off the step Donna did a quick swipe of her eyes to make sure that no dampness was there.
"Morning Sleeping beauty." Oran Moss said from his seat at the kitchen table where he sat watching CSPAN.
"Morning Dad." She replied as she sat down in her usual seat. She couldn't help just sneaking a look over at the TV as she sat down. There was CJ, doing the morning briefing, a sight that caused Donna to feel instantly homesick.
"You sleep OK Sweetie?" Mara asked as she sat a platter of Eggs and Bacon in front of Donna, The sight of wish caused Donna, who usually loved her mothers breakfast to become instantly nauseous.
"Yeah thanks." She answered as she passed the platter to her father, carefully pulling two pieces of wheat toast and putting them onto her plate. She saw her parents look at her for just a second, but then they all brushed it off.
"Josh called for you a couple of times." Mara said as she slid a bit of bacon on to her own plate. "Must say, we have to give him an "A" for effort."
"Mom." Donna said with a sigh. "I told you I don't want to talk to him, and I don't want you to tell him I'm here.I just.don't." Donna said. They'd already discussed this, she'd already explained why he couldn't know she was here.
"I know Sweetheart, and I respect it. I just think it's a bit harsh to just up and leave and not even tell the boy." She answered back. Donna knew her mothers heart was in the right place, just as she knew they would never tell Josh she was there if she didn't tell them they could.
"It's just complicated mom." Donna said as she picked up her own glass of orange juice, though she couldn't seem to find the least bit of interest in it or the toast that still sat uneaten on her plate.
"Oh for god sakes, leave the poor girl alone Mara." Oran said, shooting Donna a conspirator look. Mara just rolled her eyes and began to clear the dirty dishes from the table.
"Fine, Fine..Donna, When is Joely suppose to come and pick you up?" Mara asked as she placed a stack of plates into the dishwasher.
"She's suppose to be here in five minets to take me over to Hair- Today." She answered as she pushed back from the table. She had almost gotten to the door when Mara came into the hall after her.
"You forgot these." She said, as she handed Donna a clear plastic baggy. "Eat something." She said seriously as she handed the bag to her daughter.
"Got it chief." Donna joked as she stuck the baggy into her coat pocket. Her mother just looked at Donna then, a strange happy-sad look on her face as she brought her hand up and touched Donna's long golden hair.
"Call him when you get home.You'll both feel better." Mara said softly.
"Mom" Donna started, not quite sure what to say to make her understand, But it didn't really matter, as a moument later Donna's older sister Joely pulled into the drive.
"Hi Mom." Joely called. "Sorry for the crash and dash but the two little monsters are just about to fall asleep and I am NOT about to wake them." Joely said, motioning to the back seat where her three year old Darla and her ten week old Dathan where both dozing in their car seats.
Donna gave her mom a slight hug. "I'll see you later." She said and ran over to the car. It was good to go out with Joely, Donna realized as she road with her sister through the town where they both had spent most of their childhood. Being with Joely and the kids helped her take her mind off of Washington, and what had brought her back home after being so long away.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Joely asked. Donna just knobbed from her place on the elevated barber chair. She closed her eyes tight and waited for the hairdresser to take the first cut.
Twenty minets later a great pile of blond locks covered the floor of Hair-Today. Donna had still not opened her eyes, almost afraid to see what she'd done to herself, even though Joely kept exclaiming that it was darling.
"OK Kido, you're done." Mary Ann, the hairdresser proclaimed. Donna forced her eyes open and gazed in the mirror at her new self. Her long blond hair, now shaped into a short, shaggy cut was shocking but also oddly satisfying.
"I like it." Donna said, with a grin. Joely knobbed and a moument later they where back outside.
"OK, This is really weird." Joely said, as she played with one of the wispy locks of hair that framed Donna's face. "But cool."
Donna was having such a good time with Joely that she was almost able to forget about everything, but all to soon it was time to go back.
They walked into the house, Joely carrying Darla and Donna holding Dathan in his pumpkin seat.
"They won't be back for awhile. Mom has French cooking class." Joely replied as she laid Darla down on the guest bed.
"That's OK, I think I'm probably just going to unpack an maybe catch a nap." Donna answered as she sat Dathan's pumpkin seat down beside her on the sofa.
"You still haven't told them have you?" Joely asked as she handed Donna a mug of sun tea.
"They know." Donna said, not looking at her sister but instead gently playing with the babies tiny toes. "I told them before I came home."
"But you didn't tell everyone did you?" Joely asked, knowing her kid sister better then almost anyone on the planet.
"Joely.I couldn't do it." Donna simply answered "I couldn't tell them." She replied sadly. Joely just shook her head and put her arm around Donnas shoulder.
"You should." Was all she said. Donna thought about it for half a moument.but she knew in her heart that she could never go back. She had left that life behind and now it was up to her to make this new life work.
She just wish she knew how.