Sleep had evaded Loki all night long. He tossed and turned, unable to escape his own thoughts that plagued him.
It wasn't until very late into the night that he and Angela had gone off to bed. The topic of discussion was nowhere near as deep as it had been. But it was nice to share each other's company, after learning of a shared experience of terrible parenting.
Loki's mind now ran full speed, thinking over every word they spoke during their argument. Finally coming to a stop with her final words, "I'm glad you're here."
His heart hammered in his chest at those words. Four simple words, but they warmed him like nothing ever before. Angela accepted him. He had shown himself to her, and she didn't reject him as everyone else had. She listened to him, with no judgement in her eyes, only understanding and compassion. She shed tears for him. When his own "family" had rejected him, she welcomed him.
To Angela, he wasn't a monster; he was Loki.
He shifted and turned over once again, anxiety making him restless.
Would she believe him to be a monster when he told her the full truth?
Would she think him a monster if he told her what he planned to do?
An enormous ball of feeling grew inside his throat, making it difficult to swallow. It tasted like guilt. Finally, Loki sat up harshly, almost jerking away from the thought. Was this a matter of if or when? Would he tell her of his plan to give away an Infinity Stone to a mad tyrant in order to get his revenge?
She would be fiercely loyal to SHIELD. They had reunited her with her family. They gave her a chance. She would never betray them.
Maybe he could convince her just to look away. He needed this. He needed his revenge, but he did not wish to lose his friendship with Angela. And it would stand to reason that continuing to lie to her and tricking her to help him get the Tesseract would mean the end of their friendship.
He sighed deeply, frustration building in his body. What was that Midgardian saying? You can't have your cake and eat it too?
But he had to try. He just wasn't sure when exactly to do.
Sunlight slowly crept through his blinds, announcing the start of a new day. Damn, he had stayed up all night.
Loki grabbed his phone from the end table, taking note of the time. Angela would be awake soon to get ready for work. He might as well get up too.
The thought of discussing this with her before she left crossed his mind quickly. No, that wouldn't do. They just had an argument; he didn't want another one so soon. He despised seeing Angela go from smiling so beautifully, to being completely devoid of any emotions. He liked it even less when she had tears in her eyes, trying her hardest not to let them fall lest she appear weak.
In Loki's younger days, he had enjoyed watching some people cry. Usually, he was the one who caused it with some prank or another; snakes, toads, the time he shaved Sif's head. And he enjoyed watching the chaos and upset it caused. But with Angela, it pained him greatly to see.
The chances of her crying over this were low - she didn't seem the type to cry over a betrayal, more the type to get genuinely pissed off - but the chance of it was still there. And he hated it. And he hated the fact that it would be him that would be the one to make her cry.
The guilt that settled inside him grew.
He stepped out of his bedroom and noticed Angela had yet to awaken. Usually by the time he woke, she was starting breakfast for them both.
An idea formed in his head. Today, he would make breakfast for her. Partially to ease his guilt, and partially because she deserved it. It was honestly the least he could do.
Even though he had never cooked a meal before, he was going to try. It couldn't be that difficult, right?
Wrong.
At the diner, Angela had ordered something called crepes. He found the recipe on his phone and decided to give it a try.
Currently the crepes were stuck to the pan, burning. The once pristine kitchen now had crepe batter everywhere, and many dirty bowls stacked up.
Loki took one look around and winced. "Damn."
"If the God of Mischief damns someone, do they go to Helheim or what?"a
Loki startles at the sound of Angela's voice; he hadn't heard her door open. It took him some time to process her playful tone, but when he did, he quickly turns to see her by the dining table, trying her hardest not to laugh. He glares at her for a moment before she heads over to him and takes the ruined pan from his grasp.
Angela quickly scrapes the crepe from the pan into the trash, before going and rinsing the pan out in the sink.
Loki watches, then leans against the counter, defeated. "Did I wake you?"
"The smell of burning did actually."
She was still in her sleepwear. Her hair wrapped up in a scarf. She turned to look at him. "What made you decide to make breakfast this morning?"
"I thought I'd surprise you," he sighed.
She smiled softly at him. "Well thank you. I appreciate it. How about we start with something simple? Like eggs and bacon?"
Together, they quickly made a simple breakfast. Angela had him take over while she went to gather some plates and start on the coffee for them.
She handed him the plates and he placed the food on top and served them while Angela poured the coffee.
"And viola," she teased with a flourish.
He smiled at her, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Angela, about last night..."
She glances up at him, eyes guarded. Like she was waiting for an inevitable blow. He couldn't bring it up now. He just couldn't.
He remembered why the fight even began. Thor's beloved. The guilt inside him gripped him. Angela seemed friendly with her. While it would hurt Thor to harm his love, it would also harm Angela.
He cleared his throat, then started again. "I may have a grudge against my family, but I would never try to harm you or those you hold dear. And for that, I give you my word. I swear on my life, I will not harm Jane Foster."
She visibly relaxed and smiled at him. "Thank you, Loki. I trust that you won't."
Trust. It was a foreign concept to him. Yet Angela trusted him, the Liesmith.
At that moment he knew he couldn't screw this up.