Disclaimer: I feel nice today, so no sarcasm. *pouts* RK belongs to the abnormally-talented Watsuki (I can't remember how to spell his first name at the moment, so I will refrain from trying). Britney Spear's songs...belong to whoever wrote them. Don't sue me; if you do, I'll be forced to run you over with my Fangirl Powers. *cheerfully* Have a nice day!
Author's Notes: So I'm back…and crazier than ever! Thanks to all the wonderful reviewers. *pause* All…three…of you. ^_^ But it's okay, I'm glad someone got a kick out of my demented creations. There's only one scene this time, but it's a bit long--hope you enjoy it!
Dedications: To mocha pecan ice cream. Mmmmm…
Scene 5
Saitou: Why does everyone get an image song except me? *blows out stream of cigarette smoke* *scornfully* Ahou. All of them. *more ciggy smoke*
A/N: Stop right there! *brightly* Kids, don't smoke! It's bad for your health! Saitou-san here will end up with yellow teeth, wrinkly skin, and black lungs in a couple more years, so don't be like him!
Saitou: *dangerously* What?
A/N: Eh…he…he…he…just go back to bemoaning your lack of an image song.
Saitou: *decides to ignore the author* Even the two little brats have an image song.
Tokio: Oh, honey, it's all right. I'll find you one.
Saitou: …
Tokio: *delighted* In fact, I have the perfect song for you! *whispers in Saitou's ear*
Saitou: Tokio! I can't sing that!
Tokio: *purrs* Please? For me?
Saitou: *grumbling* The things I do for you, woman.
[Karaoke Night at the Akabeko…]
Sano: Oi, Kenshin! Stop hogging the stage! You've been up there three times already!
Kenshin: *sheepishly* Sorry, Sano. I like to sing.
Yahiko: *muttering* We can tell.
Sano: Just get off before you start singing the "sake" song. *shudders*
Kenshin: *somewhat offended* I thought that the sake song was rather nice.
Saitou: *appears out of the shadows behind Kenshin, wisps of smoke curling around his head* Battousai. Move.
Kenshin: Why should I?
Saitou: Because it's my turn.
Kenshin: *blanches* O…ro?
Saitou: *sourly* Just get off the stage, Battousai.
Kenshin: *walks off in a daze, chibi images of Saitou in J-pop costumes dancing around his head*
Audience: *looks at Saitou in similar state of shock*
Kaoru: H-He's going to SING?!
Sano: *turns away* I can't watch.
Saitou: *snarling* This is my image song, which has been long overdue, so shut up and listen!
[Silence. Crickets chirping.]
Saitou: *drops cigarette and calmly steps on it* Begin.
[Background music starts, and The Akabeko pulses with a sensuous, jungle-like beat.]
Saitou: *deep, provocative voice* I'm a slaaaaave for you
I cannot hold it, I cannot control it
Tokio: *cracks whip*
Saitou: I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I won't deny it, I'm not trying to hide it
Misao: I-I think I'm going to be sick…
Aoshi: *urge to retch breaking through his icy calm*
Saitou: Baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
To another time and place *pelvic thrust*
Yahiko: My eyes, my eyes!
Kenshin: What is with all of this pelvic-thrusting lately de gozaru yo! *panic adding more of that well-known phrase to the end of his sentences than usual* First Shishio de gozaru yo! Now Saitou de gozaru yoooo!
Kaoru: Stop that! It's getting on my nerves!
Kenshin: What de gozaru ka?
Kaoru: THAT! *smacks him on the cheek with that handy shinai*
Kenshin: *flys into the air* Orororororo…
Saitou: Oh, baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
Leaving behind my name and age *panting*
Tokio: Work it baby!
Saitou: I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I cannot hold it, I cannot control it
I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I won't deny it, I'm not trying to hide it
*raspy whisper* Get it get it, get it get, oh
Get it get it, get it get it, ohhhh…
*alternate panting/whispering until music fades out*
Tokio: *proudly* That's my Saitou!
* * *
A/N: Twisted, twisted…but review, please! *whining* Pleeeeaaaseeee??? Pretty please? With a Kenshin on top? Uh-oh, bad thoughts. ^_^ But I would be forever grateful! Geez, is this pathetic or what? I sound desperate...ehehe...
Author's Notes: So I'm back…and crazier than ever! Thanks to all the wonderful reviewers. *pause* All…three…of you. ^_^ But it's okay, I'm glad someone got a kick out of my demented creations. There's only one scene this time, but it's a bit long--hope you enjoy it!
Dedications: To mocha pecan ice cream. Mmmmm…
Scene 5
Saitou: Why does everyone get an image song except me? *blows out stream of cigarette smoke* *scornfully* Ahou. All of them. *more ciggy smoke*
A/N: Stop right there! *brightly* Kids, don't smoke! It's bad for your health! Saitou-san here will end up with yellow teeth, wrinkly skin, and black lungs in a couple more years, so don't be like him!
Saitou: *dangerously* What?
A/N: Eh…he…he…he…just go back to bemoaning your lack of an image song.
Saitou: *decides to ignore the author* Even the two little brats have an image song.
Tokio: Oh, honey, it's all right. I'll find you one.
Saitou: …
Tokio: *delighted* In fact, I have the perfect song for you! *whispers in Saitou's ear*
Saitou: Tokio! I can't sing that!
Tokio: *purrs* Please? For me?
Saitou: *grumbling* The things I do for you, woman.
[Karaoke Night at the Akabeko…]
Sano: Oi, Kenshin! Stop hogging the stage! You've been up there three times already!
Kenshin: *sheepishly* Sorry, Sano. I like to sing.
Yahiko: *muttering* We can tell.
Sano: Just get off before you start singing the "sake" song. *shudders*
Kenshin: *somewhat offended* I thought that the sake song was rather nice.
Saitou: *appears out of the shadows behind Kenshin, wisps of smoke curling around his head* Battousai. Move.
Kenshin: Why should I?
Saitou: Because it's my turn.
Kenshin: *blanches* O…ro?
Saitou: *sourly* Just get off the stage, Battousai.
Kenshin: *walks off in a daze, chibi images of Saitou in J-pop costumes dancing around his head*
Audience: *looks at Saitou in similar state of shock*
Kaoru: H-He's going to SING?!
Sano: *turns away* I can't watch.
Saitou: *snarling* This is my image song, which has been long overdue, so shut up and listen!
[Silence. Crickets chirping.]
Saitou: *drops cigarette and calmly steps on it* Begin.
[Background music starts, and The Akabeko pulses with a sensuous, jungle-like beat.]
Saitou: *deep, provocative voice* I'm a slaaaaave for you
I cannot hold it, I cannot control it
Tokio: *cracks whip*
Saitou: I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I won't deny it, I'm not trying to hide it
Misao: I-I think I'm going to be sick…
Aoshi: *urge to retch breaking through his icy calm*
Saitou: Baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
To another time and place *pelvic thrust*
Yahiko: My eyes, my eyes!
Kenshin: What is with all of this pelvic-thrusting lately de gozaru yo! *panic adding more of that well-known phrase to the end of his sentences than usual* First Shishio de gozaru yo! Now Saitou de gozaru yoooo!
Kaoru: Stop that! It's getting on my nerves!
Kenshin: What de gozaru ka?
Kaoru: THAT! *smacks him on the cheek with that handy shinai*
Kenshin: *flys into the air* Orororororo…
Saitou: Oh, baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
Leaving behind my name and age *panting*
Tokio: Work it baby!
Saitou: I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I cannot hold it, I cannot control it
I'm a slaaaaaave for you
I won't deny it, I'm not trying to hide it
*raspy whisper* Get it get it, get it get, oh
Get it get it, get it get it, ohhhh…
*alternate panting/whispering until music fades out*
Tokio: *proudly* That's my Saitou!
* * *
A/N: Twisted, twisted…but review, please! *whining* Pleeeeaaaseeee??? Pretty please? With a Kenshin on top? Uh-oh, bad thoughts. ^_^ But I would be forever grateful! Geez, is this pathetic or what? I sound desperate...ehehe...