I now have another reason to despise my computer. It just decided that
there would be no more country music played tonight and begun playing
Puddle of Mud instead. I can't compose epic stories to Puddle of Mud!!
It would seem that this box of parts has something against Kenny Chesney
and Lonestar. What nerve. That was really really weird. I even closed
Media Player and RESTARTED and it still wouldn't shut off. Spooky… could
it be a spirit? A Spirit of the Past? Mwa ha ha. You care, I know that
deep down , you really care.
Now on to something completely different. I love Ron angst as much as the next person (well maybe more, since this chapter is completely Ron angst) but I am getting too sad writing this. I might have to insert a fluff chapter or two to lighten everything up. Maybe something Neville-y flavored. Neville-y flavored with a dash of….who? Hermione? Seamus? Madame Hooch? (that could be interesting) I guess you could make polite suggestions.
He left Hermione and started walking. In the halls he was avoided. Other students would cross the hallway just to not be near him. Shunned. He tried to look like he wasn't affected by their actions, but he was failing. This was quite like when everyone believed that Harry was the one petrifying people. Only then, Harry had Ron. This time, Ron didn't have Harry. He only had Hermione. Not that she was worthless, mind you, just unable to help him now. Ron tossed his head up, determined to make it outside before he lost control, and walked out a side door.
A week of class had passed so far, each day getting a bit worse for Ron. It was a Friday afternoon now and every other student was excited for having the first week over with and to be able to relax for two days. All four common rooms were crowded with students chatting over the first week's experiences. Ron spent the weekend away from all of the other students for most of the time. He talked a bit with Hermione, Seamus, and Neville, as well as a few other students that hadn't completely forsaken him in Gryffindor.
He tried to stay away from Harry and the others as much as possible and was largely successful. While he stayed away from them, he surely didn't forget about them. During every conversation with the aforementioned Gryffindors he would ask how Harry was, like the friend he so dearly wanted to be would. Hearing about Harry's adventures during the week was the one thing that kept him going and put a smile on his face.
There was another troubled soul in Gryffindor House, but this one would be unexpected by nearly all. This child had everything he wanted, but was afraid to his very core of one thing. He was all smiles around everyone else, especially the object of his desire, but at night when the lights were out, he shivered and shook in fright, scared of abandonment. No one else knew his fear. No one.
The same week early Quiddich practice began again. This year Gryffindor had to replace Oliver Wood at the Keeper position as well as elect a new captain. Wood had graduated the year before the Tri-Wizard Tournament and because of the Tournament, of course no games were played last year. For the Keeper position, Gryffindor looked to a third-year named Chris McGuinn who did quite well in the try-outs. He was a bit unsteady under heavy pressure, but McGonagall was sure that he'd break in real nice and quick, hopefully by the first match against Ravenclaw.
The team tried to automatically name Harry as the new captain, but he graciously declined the honor. The mantle instead passed to Katie Bell. The first practices were rather rough since they hadn't played together in over a year. In fact, a non-biased viewer of all four houses' first week of practice would have to admit that Gryffindor was maybe good enough for third place behind Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Of course the Gryffindors definitely wouldn't believe that.
During the Friday afternoon's practice Harry received a letter as they were preparing to mount their brooms. Opening it after the owl left the field, Harry was quite excited to find it was from Oliver Wood. He wrote the team to wish them luck and to let them know that he had been drafted by the Chudley Cannons and would start as Keeper this season.
"Wow! That's great!" Harry said after he finished reading the letter to the team. "He'll be great, I know it. He was great here," Katie said.
"Yeah," Harry added, "he's playing for the Cannons. Ron'll love to-" he stopped in mid-sentence and looked back at the castle. "Ron'll love to know that." Harry walked over to the bench to both put the letter with his gear as well as to get himself under control. The silence between them had begun to really get to him about a week ago. He missed Ron terribly. Although it pained him greatly, he wasn't about to go and ditch Colin just for Ron's sake. He just hoped that Ron would get his ducks in a row quick.
Ron would sit under a tree about a half mile from the field and watch the practices. He'd watch Harry and the rest of the team circle and dive and loop all over the countryside. He'd smile. Sometimes watching made him feel better, other times it didn't help at all. Ron would always leave the field while the team headed to the locker room so he wouldn't be noticed. Where he went from there changed daily. The only thing he did consistently is not go to dinner with the rest of the students. After today's practice, he took a short walk around the lake and decided to go on back and grab a quick shower and then just go to bed. He just wanted to fall into slumber so he wouldn't have to deal with anything else today more than he wanted dinner.
Harry cleaned up and hurried back to the common room with the great news, hoping he could catch the Gryffindors before they went to the Great Hall. He found a majority of them there, writing essays and playing chess mostly. Harry quickly looked around and hoped to see Ron but didn't so he squelched a feeling of loneliness and blurted out the news to everyone.
The replies were varied, as a few of the younger years knew nothing of either Wood or Quiddich so they cared not, to shouts of congratulations and cheers from the older students. The letter was set up on the mantle and charmed to shine orange.
Hermione was one of two people who recognized Harry's glance about the room for what it was, so she whispered to him that she'd tell him first off when he came back in. Harry quietly thanked her and went up to the dormitories while nearly all the rest of the Gryffindors went down to dinner. Colin, being the other person catching the glance around the room, stayed behind as the others left and followed Harry up the steps a few minutes later.
Harry was laying face up on his bed, with his hands behind his head and his legs crossed. His eyes were shut tight and if he heard the door open on its nearly silent hinges he gave no notice. The door nearly silently shut after the small boy stepped through. He looked over at Harry and wondered if he was already asleep. Not that quick. Unless it's in Professor Binn's class…
Colin stood at the foot of the bed and watched Harry for a moment. He seemed to be barely breathing. Aside from the slight rise and fall of his chest it would seem he might be dead. Colin stood for a moment longer, trying to get his courage up to say what he came to say. After a deep breath, he began.
"Harry," he called out in a voice just slightly above a whisper with a pained look on his face, "Harry, can I talk to you for a minute?"
Colin was about to call to him again when he finally moved. His eyes opened and focused on Colin. At least they tried to. A hand snaked over to the bedside table and lifted his glasses to his eyes.
"Hello, Colin. What's up?" Harry answered in a very relaxed voice.
"Harry, I um, was sort of wondering if I could, ah, talk to you for a minute or two."
"Sure, pull up some bed and have a seat." Harry pulled his legs back and sat up against the headboard and Colin sat on the side of the bed. "What's on your mind?"
"Harry, I've been watching, well, that's not quite what I meant, I mean I've noticed-" Colin broke off in mid thought, seemingly unsure as of how to put his words.
"Deep breath, Colin. Inhale. Count to five. Exhale. Feel a bit better?"
Actually Colin did. Maybe calmer, not better. "A little. Harry, I know how great friends you and Ron are, and I know that you are hurting bad over all this, and it's my fault anyway--" Colin was talking so rapidly that Harry could barely make his words out.
"Colin, slow down, I can barely understand you. Slow down." Harry saw that something was obviously troubling Colin, so he scooted over to the side of the bed next to the boy.
"Okay. I have seen you hurting ever since we came back to school. I just want you to know that if you want to," he took a deep breath and sniffed once before continuing, "if you want to forget about me and be friends with Ron again, I understand."
Colin looked at Harry after he got the last few words out and looked as if he might shatter. To say that Harry was stunned would be an understatement. He was soundless for a few seconds and in that short time Colin began shedding tears like a fountain, sure that Harry would drop him like a bad habit.
When he finally spoke, Colin was in full leak mode and Harry had to blink one back too. "Colin, you're right on one thing, I am hurting, pretty bad actually. We've been close for five years." he reached over and pulled Colin into a hug. "But you're completely wrong on another." he used the hand around his Colin's shoulder to lift his face up. "I will never, *never*, forget about you, colin. Never."
Colin smiled a teary-eyed smile and hugged Harry back hard, burying his face in Harry's t-shirt. Harry leaned his forehead down until it was touching the crown of Colin's head. Harry closed his eyes and just held him as he sobbed himself out, gently patting and rubbing Colin's back.
"Maybe I should talk to a Professor about this," Ron thought to himself in a moment of brilliance. He had been weighing that thought for two days now, but was worried that they might send him off to some asylum like St. Mungo's if they decided he was crazy. That was the last thing he wanted. He wasn't crazy, was he? No, most likely not. Definitely depressed, but not crazy.
Ron ducked into a classroom as he heard a voice from around a corner that sounded very much like Hermione telling someone named Seamus to quit using such horrible language and if McGonagall were to hear him… Ron pulled the door shut and ducked low as the gaggle of Gryffindors passed by him. Once silence returned, he peeked out the glass and saw an empty hallway. He opened the door and sighed. He missed them. Missed them bad. He turned back to the path to his common room.
He stepped into the deserted room and felt the people who had just left. Feelings of happiness. Ron stood and wished he could be in that world again. With his head hung low he trudged up the steps toward his room. He stopped halfway and looked back over the room. It felt like someone else's place, not remotely his. He turned back to the steps and again dropped his head.
He pushed the door to his room open and mentally thanked Hagrid. Hagrid had sent some half-giant made jelly to them last Christmas and seeing as it was completely inedible, it was used by Seamus to lubricate the squeaky door hinge. It had been silent since. While the door was almost silent, the first thing he saw when he looked in the room made him absolutely mute.
There was Harry holding Colin in a classic example of a lovers' embrace. Ron stood there stunned for a ten count and then quickly turned on his heels and retreated back down the steps, beginning to sob but muffling the sounds. He blindly ran down corridors until he could run no more. He ducked into a classroom and collapsed.
"Colin? Are you awake?" Harry asked softly after the crying child had ceased moving. Getting no answer, Harry realized how much this must have been bothering Colin. "He actually thought that I'd abandon him like that?" Harry wondered. "I couldn't. no way. Never. I couldn't leave someone I love like that. Did I just think love? Hmm…maybe. I've not felt like this before." Harry snuck an arm under Colin's legs and picked him up. He scooted back so he was completely on the bed and laid the them both down, Colin still hugging him and with his own arm around the smaller boy.
"I'll just lay here for a few minutes and then wake him up and we'll go get dinner," Harry said to himself. It was a good plan, but a tiresome practice and the feeling of serenity and calm he felt now convinced his body otherwise. He fell asleep within two minutes.
Oh poor Ron!!! Someone make me stop!!! Things aren't looking good now, and aren't going to look up for a bit either. On the other hand, Harry and Colin are soooo cute I'm getting a warm fuzzy feeling all over. Ahhhhh, so sweet. What do you think? Hopefully, I'll get another chapter up today to make up for the lack of weekend postings (stupid work thing) cross your fingers and leave me a few reviews in the meantime.
Oh, another idea- if you all come across any great stories, let me know. Drop me an email (super-goose@excite.com) or put it in the review box. I don't always get to read as many stories as I want due to typing time ( two broken fingers really slow you down) and that stupid ol' job of mine.
Now on to something completely different. I love Ron angst as much as the next person (well maybe more, since this chapter is completely Ron angst) but I am getting too sad writing this. I might have to insert a fluff chapter or two to lighten everything up. Maybe something Neville-y flavored. Neville-y flavored with a dash of….who? Hermione? Seamus? Madame Hooch? (that could be interesting) I guess you could make polite suggestions.
He left Hermione and started walking. In the halls he was avoided. Other students would cross the hallway just to not be near him. Shunned. He tried to look like he wasn't affected by their actions, but he was failing. This was quite like when everyone believed that Harry was the one petrifying people. Only then, Harry had Ron. This time, Ron didn't have Harry. He only had Hermione. Not that she was worthless, mind you, just unable to help him now. Ron tossed his head up, determined to make it outside before he lost control, and walked out a side door.
A week of class had passed so far, each day getting a bit worse for Ron. It was a Friday afternoon now and every other student was excited for having the first week over with and to be able to relax for two days. All four common rooms were crowded with students chatting over the first week's experiences. Ron spent the weekend away from all of the other students for most of the time. He talked a bit with Hermione, Seamus, and Neville, as well as a few other students that hadn't completely forsaken him in Gryffindor.
He tried to stay away from Harry and the others as much as possible and was largely successful. While he stayed away from them, he surely didn't forget about them. During every conversation with the aforementioned Gryffindors he would ask how Harry was, like the friend he so dearly wanted to be would. Hearing about Harry's adventures during the week was the one thing that kept him going and put a smile on his face.
There was another troubled soul in Gryffindor House, but this one would be unexpected by nearly all. This child had everything he wanted, but was afraid to his very core of one thing. He was all smiles around everyone else, especially the object of his desire, but at night when the lights were out, he shivered and shook in fright, scared of abandonment. No one else knew his fear. No one.
The same week early Quiddich practice began again. This year Gryffindor had to replace Oliver Wood at the Keeper position as well as elect a new captain. Wood had graduated the year before the Tri-Wizard Tournament and because of the Tournament, of course no games were played last year. For the Keeper position, Gryffindor looked to a third-year named Chris McGuinn who did quite well in the try-outs. He was a bit unsteady under heavy pressure, but McGonagall was sure that he'd break in real nice and quick, hopefully by the first match against Ravenclaw.
The team tried to automatically name Harry as the new captain, but he graciously declined the honor. The mantle instead passed to Katie Bell. The first practices were rather rough since they hadn't played together in over a year. In fact, a non-biased viewer of all four houses' first week of practice would have to admit that Gryffindor was maybe good enough for third place behind Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Of course the Gryffindors definitely wouldn't believe that.
During the Friday afternoon's practice Harry received a letter as they were preparing to mount their brooms. Opening it after the owl left the field, Harry was quite excited to find it was from Oliver Wood. He wrote the team to wish them luck and to let them know that he had been drafted by the Chudley Cannons and would start as Keeper this season.
"Wow! That's great!" Harry said after he finished reading the letter to the team. "He'll be great, I know it. He was great here," Katie said.
"Yeah," Harry added, "he's playing for the Cannons. Ron'll love to-" he stopped in mid-sentence and looked back at the castle. "Ron'll love to know that." Harry walked over to the bench to both put the letter with his gear as well as to get himself under control. The silence between them had begun to really get to him about a week ago. He missed Ron terribly. Although it pained him greatly, he wasn't about to go and ditch Colin just for Ron's sake. He just hoped that Ron would get his ducks in a row quick.
Ron would sit under a tree about a half mile from the field and watch the practices. He'd watch Harry and the rest of the team circle and dive and loop all over the countryside. He'd smile. Sometimes watching made him feel better, other times it didn't help at all. Ron would always leave the field while the team headed to the locker room so he wouldn't be noticed. Where he went from there changed daily. The only thing he did consistently is not go to dinner with the rest of the students. After today's practice, he took a short walk around the lake and decided to go on back and grab a quick shower and then just go to bed. He just wanted to fall into slumber so he wouldn't have to deal with anything else today more than he wanted dinner.
Harry cleaned up and hurried back to the common room with the great news, hoping he could catch the Gryffindors before they went to the Great Hall. He found a majority of them there, writing essays and playing chess mostly. Harry quickly looked around and hoped to see Ron but didn't so he squelched a feeling of loneliness and blurted out the news to everyone.
The replies were varied, as a few of the younger years knew nothing of either Wood or Quiddich so they cared not, to shouts of congratulations and cheers from the older students. The letter was set up on the mantle and charmed to shine orange.
Hermione was one of two people who recognized Harry's glance about the room for what it was, so she whispered to him that she'd tell him first off when he came back in. Harry quietly thanked her and went up to the dormitories while nearly all the rest of the Gryffindors went down to dinner. Colin, being the other person catching the glance around the room, stayed behind as the others left and followed Harry up the steps a few minutes later.
Harry was laying face up on his bed, with his hands behind his head and his legs crossed. His eyes were shut tight and if he heard the door open on its nearly silent hinges he gave no notice. The door nearly silently shut after the small boy stepped through. He looked over at Harry and wondered if he was already asleep. Not that quick. Unless it's in Professor Binn's class…
Colin stood at the foot of the bed and watched Harry for a moment. He seemed to be barely breathing. Aside from the slight rise and fall of his chest it would seem he might be dead. Colin stood for a moment longer, trying to get his courage up to say what he came to say. After a deep breath, he began.
"Harry," he called out in a voice just slightly above a whisper with a pained look on his face, "Harry, can I talk to you for a minute?"
Colin was about to call to him again when he finally moved. His eyes opened and focused on Colin. At least they tried to. A hand snaked over to the bedside table and lifted his glasses to his eyes.
"Hello, Colin. What's up?" Harry answered in a very relaxed voice.
"Harry, I um, was sort of wondering if I could, ah, talk to you for a minute or two."
"Sure, pull up some bed and have a seat." Harry pulled his legs back and sat up against the headboard and Colin sat on the side of the bed. "What's on your mind?"
"Harry, I've been watching, well, that's not quite what I meant, I mean I've noticed-" Colin broke off in mid thought, seemingly unsure as of how to put his words.
"Deep breath, Colin. Inhale. Count to five. Exhale. Feel a bit better?"
Actually Colin did. Maybe calmer, not better. "A little. Harry, I know how great friends you and Ron are, and I know that you are hurting bad over all this, and it's my fault anyway--" Colin was talking so rapidly that Harry could barely make his words out.
"Colin, slow down, I can barely understand you. Slow down." Harry saw that something was obviously troubling Colin, so he scooted over to the side of the bed next to the boy.
"Okay. I have seen you hurting ever since we came back to school. I just want you to know that if you want to," he took a deep breath and sniffed once before continuing, "if you want to forget about me and be friends with Ron again, I understand."
Colin looked at Harry after he got the last few words out and looked as if he might shatter. To say that Harry was stunned would be an understatement. He was soundless for a few seconds and in that short time Colin began shedding tears like a fountain, sure that Harry would drop him like a bad habit.
When he finally spoke, Colin was in full leak mode and Harry had to blink one back too. "Colin, you're right on one thing, I am hurting, pretty bad actually. We've been close for five years." he reached over and pulled Colin into a hug. "But you're completely wrong on another." he used the hand around his Colin's shoulder to lift his face up. "I will never, *never*, forget about you, colin. Never."
Colin smiled a teary-eyed smile and hugged Harry back hard, burying his face in Harry's t-shirt. Harry leaned his forehead down until it was touching the crown of Colin's head. Harry closed his eyes and just held him as he sobbed himself out, gently patting and rubbing Colin's back.
"Maybe I should talk to a Professor about this," Ron thought to himself in a moment of brilliance. He had been weighing that thought for two days now, but was worried that they might send him off to some asylum like St. Mungo's if they decided he was crazy. That was the last thing he wanted. He wasn't crazy, was he? No, most likely not. Definitely depressed, but not crazy.
Ron ducked into a classroom as he heard a voice from around a corner that sounded very much like Hermione telling someone named Seamus to quit using such horrible language and if McGonagall were to hear him… Ron pulled the door shut and ducked low as the gaggle of Gryffindors passed by him. Once silence returned, he peeked out the glass and saw an empty hallway. He opened the door and sighed. He missed them. Missed them bad. He turned back to the path to his common room.
He stepped into the deserted room and felt the people who had just left. Feelings of happiness. Ron stood and wished he could be in that world again. With his head hung low he trudged up the steps toward his room. He stopped halfway and looked back over the room. It felt like someone else's place, not remotely his. He turned back to the steps and again dropped his head.
He pushed the door to his room open and mentally thanked Hagrid. Hagrid had sent some half-giant made jelly to them last Christmas and seeing as it was completely inedible, it was used by Seamus to lubricate the squeaky door hinge. It had been silent since. While the door was almost silent, the first thing he saw when he looked in the room made him absolutely mute.
There was Harry holding Colin in a classic example of a lovers' embrace. Ron stood there stunned for a ten count and then quickly turned on his heels and retreated back down the steps, beginning to sob but muffling the sounds. He blindly ran down corridors until he could run no more. He ducked into a classroom and collapsed.
"Colin? Are you awake?" Harry asked softly after the crying child had ceased moving. Getting no answer, Harry realized how much this must have been bothering Colin. "He actually thought that I'd abandon him like that?" Harry wondered. "I couldn't. no way. Never. I couldn't leave someone I love like that. Did I just think love? Hmm…maybe. I've not felt like this before." Harry snuck an arm under Colin's legs and picked him up. He scooted back so he was completely on the bed and laid the them both down, Colin still hugging him and with his own arm around the smaller boy.
"I'll just lay here for a few minutes and then wake him up and we'll go get dinner," Harry said to himself. It was a good plan, but a tiresome practice and the feeling of serenity and calm he felt now convinced his body otherwise. He fell asleep within two minutes.
Oh poor Ron!!! Someone make me stop!!! Things aren't looking good now, and aren't going to look up for a bit either. On the other hand, Harry and Colin are soooo cute I'm getting a warm fuzzy feeling all over. Ahhhhh, so sweet. What do you think? Hopefully, I'll get another chapter up today to make up for the lack of weekend postings (stupid work thing) cross your fingers and leave me a few reviews in the meantime.
Oh, another idea- if you all come across any great stories, let me know. Drop me an email (super-goose@excite.com) or put it in the review box. I don't always get to read as many stories as I want due to typing time ( two broken fingers really slow you down) and that stupid ol' job of mine.