Here is is....the final (thank GOD) Chapter in Kamui's straightness saga. We hope you have enjoyed the show. ^_^
Part Seven: It's the End of the World as we Know It! The Final Battle! Or not.
Fifty years have passed since it was first the year 1999 in the CLAMP world of Tokyo. Fiftey years, and no one has aged.
Because the Story of X continues on.
And On, an on, and on, and on, and-*THWAP*
Ahem. Anyway, in a dark and dusky bar, Aoki Seiichiro is drinking some fine potato vodka (blame it on the Russians, it's thier creating...the vodka, that is, not Aoki-sama), thinking about the past fiftey years.
'My wife is still beautiful...doesn't question the fact I havn't been home for more than a day at a time, even though I'm surrounded by the lovely manga-ka, and the soap girl Karen-san....Oh lovey, I miss you. I miss our daughter, I miss everything. And then, there are all of these nubile young men around me....,' Aoki thought, and shifted in his chair. He took another sip from the glass, and sighed again. 'I swear, Kamui is as pretty as a girl....you know, I don't think that Subaru, Keiichi and Fuuma are attracted to him because he's a pretty man. I think it's because they look at him and think-girl with penis. And if I could have a penny for everytime Sorata hit on Kamui......'
Into the bar walked a tall, broad shouldered man who did *not* look his age of 17+50. Short, spiky black hair and a trendy trench coat, sportng a very slick pair of raybans that would make any MIB 'look good', even Agent K. He sat down across from Aoki, and smiled.
"You don't mind, do you?"
"Dammit Fuuma....not here. Not now," said Aoki. Fuuma lifted Aoki's chin to meet hs eyes, and smiled.
"That's not why I'm here....at least, not at the moment anyway," he said, smiling. "By the way, thank you for taking Seishiro's place, I was wondering what [authorial note: read "who"] I was going to do since he left."
Aoki smiled back, and gave Fuuma his best drunken grin as he batted the hand away from his chin. "Noooooo problem, me amigo. As long as you no killa me, we-a be fiiiiiine."
Fuuma snorted. "Aoki, you are drunk."
Aoki grinned more. "Yup. Just started to kick in. I figured, it's been fiftey damned years, Fuuma-baby. I've been Sei-chan's replacment for fiftey years, ands I've never once felt for a moment that you were going to start the holy 'final battle' any time soon, you know? So, I figured getting drunk wouldn't matter much."
Fuuma nodded. "You've got a point."
"So, you got sumthin I wanna hear?"
"Yes," said Fuuma. His voice was grave, and serious. "Aoki, you are the very wind beneath my wings."
Aoki fell over.
Kamui was gong to leave the house. He was dressed in tight tight tight leather pants he had borowed from Subaru, and was wearing a soft, silky shirt that was half buttoned. He looked damn sexy.
'I'm gong to go and pck up chicks, rah!' thought Kamui. 'No more being told I'm gay, no sir, I'm straight as an arrow!'
"Hey Kamui," said Subaru, staring at Kamui's sweet leather-clad ass, "Next time you want to get into my pants, all you have to do is ask."
Kamui, who had been horny just seconds before, walked dejectedly towards his room.
"K-kamui? What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I think I'm going to go and call Fuuma."
"WHAT????"
"You heard me. It's time to end this!"
In the bar where we had left Fuuma and Aoki, after Fuuma revived Aoki, the two started doing shots together, tryng to drink the other under the table. Since coming to Tokyo 50 years ago, Aoki had grown immune to the immidiate effects of potato vodka (Dan Quale spelling 'potatoe vodkah'), and Fuuma, since becoming the Dark Kamui, had been doing shots with 'The Morning Star' (bonus points if you know who I'm talking about, triple bonus points if you know the movie where I got that from, and even more if you know the character who says the words in reference to 'The Morning Star', and hell, a dollar if you know the actor and can recite the scene), so he wasn't going down for awhile.
But then, suddenly, Karen burst through the door. "Aoki!" she cried, a great urgency in her voice. "It's Arashi!"
Fuuma snorted. It was sexy. "So? What's the bitch done now?" asked Fuuma.
Igoring the sexy snort from Fuuma, and his comment (okay, so all the good ones were gay or taken, and Fuuma....well, he wasn't one of the ones Karen deemed 'good,' but he was definetly gay in her mind), Kaen looked at Aoki. "Aoki, she's locked herself in the champange room! It's horrible! And Sorata-"
"Fuck Sorata!" [Authorial note: Aoki SWORE? *dies*] said Aoki, finally snapping back to attention. "Doesn't she know?"
Karen looked at Aoki, then to Fuuma. Fuuma shrugged. Then Karen realized, 'shitfuckhell, what's Fuuma doing drinking with Aoki? WAIT-what's Aoki doing drinking with Fuuma???'
"Aoki-san," said Fuuma, gently, but wavering, "What's the problem?"
"THERE IS NO X IN THE CHAMPANGE ROOM!"
Fuuma was curious. Then Karen said, "But Kamui said-"
"NO!" yelled Aoki. "No matter what Kamui Shiro says, there is NO X in the Champagne Room."
Karen grabbed Aoki, and headed for the door. Fuuma drunkenly followed.
Part Seven B: No X in the Champane Room
Karen was trying to burn down the door to the Champange room, but to no use. Kamui had mind-bolted the door shut, and had trapped himself inside.
"For the love of GOD, Kamui!" yelled Aoki. "There's to be NO X IN THE GOD-DAMNED CHAMPAGNE ROOM!!!!"
"It's no use," said Nekoi. "We've been trying to tell them that all night, but to no avail. Kamui says he's not coming out until everyone acceptes he's straight, and Arashi won't leave until Sorata promises not to try and have sex with her anymore."
"Hmm," hummed Aoki. "A problem indeed. Well, Arashi we can do, but Kamui isn't really straight."
"Hah. Looks like you haven't tried to seduce him," said Subaru, wearing the usual leather. "The boy is always whimpering. You know, despite the way he reacts under Fuuma's hands, I think he's truly straight."
"You've got to be kidding! Pretty boys like that can't be straight!" said Sorata. "It's geneticaly impossible."
A voice cried out from inside the room. "Well, it's true! So, bite me Sorata! I'm straight, you're straight, the only people here who are into men are Karen, Nekoi and Subaru!"
"Wait," said Karen, "what about Arashi?"
"Oh," said Arashi's voice from behind the door, "I have to tell he truth. I find women much more stimulating."
Everyone cringed as Sorata howled into the night.
Fuuma, who had followed everyone to the manson, had decded that it was better to pass out on the front steps then find out what was going on (though not really, he was just too inebriated to move by the time he got there). Luckily, Yuuto appeared about then, and had his bondage women pick Fuuma up, and carry him back to the Chi no Ryu base of Operations.
One Week Later:
********Tokyo Morning Newspaper**********
Yesterday, someone reported seeing blue and red dragons fighting around Tokyo Tower. As residents and passerbys were assured that it was NOT another Season of Fushigi Yuugi being played out, or the newest Sailor Moon Musical, police did report many differents severed heads and bodies falling from up above.
One observer said that when the heads started to fall, strange music began to play all over the park. She said, "I didn't recognise the song at first....but once the lyrics of the song became audible, I knew right away-it was that old X-Japan song, 'Forever Love'. It was shocking, I was pretty sure that X Japan had brocken up a few years ago."
After that, it weas reported that two Japanese school boys, one Shiro Kamui and one Monou Fuuma, came floating down from the top of Tokyo Tower, each holding a severed head in their hands. Shiro was holding Monou's head, and Monou was holding Shiro's head. Once they landed, they began sobbing hysterically, and hugging the heads. Yuzihria Nekoi was reported as saying that's when the song burst out with the lines "Forever love/Forever dream."
After that, a pillar of light sucked up Shiro, and no one has seen him since.
The end.
Moral of the story: The only way to end X is hugging some pretty boy severed heads, and singing "Forever Love."
P.S.- Stay tuned for an Epiloge. It should be here....next week, or sooner. You'll like it. We promise.
Part Seven: It's the End of the World as we Know It! The Final Battle! Or not.
Fifty years have passed since it was first the year 1999 in the CLAMP world of Tokyo. Fiftey years, and no one has aged.
Because the Story of X continues on.
And On, an on, and on, and on, and-*THWAP*
Ahem. Anyway, in a dark and dusky bar, Aoki Seiichiro is drinking some fine potato vodka (blame it on the Russians, it's thier creating...the vodka, that is, not Aoki-sama), thinking about the past fiftey years.
'My wife is still beautiful...doesn't question the fact I havn't been home for more than a day at a time, even though I'm surrounded by the lovely manga-ka, and the soap girl Karen-san....Oh lovey, I miss you. I miss our daughter, I miss everything. And then, there are all of these nubile young men around me....,' Aoki thought, and shifted in his chair. He took another sip from the glass, and sighed again. 'I swear, Kamui is as pretty as a girl....you know, I don't think that Subaru, Keiichi and Fuuma are attracted to him because he's a pretty man. I think it's because they look at him and think-girl with penis. And if I could have a penny for everytime Sorata hit on Kamui......'
Into the bar walked a tall, broad shouldered man who did *not* look his age of 17+50. Short, spiky black hair and a trendy trench coat, sportng a very slick pair of raybans that would make any MIB 'look good', even Agent K. He sat down across from Aoki, and smiled.
"You don't mind, do you?"
"Dammit Fuuma....not here. Not now," said Aoki. Fuuma lifted Aoki's chin to meet hs eyes, and smiled.
"That's not why I'm here....at least, not at the moment anyway," he said, smiling. "By the way, thank you for taking Seishiro's place, I was wondering what [authorial note: read "who"] I was going to do since he left."
Aoki smiled back, and gave Fuuma his best drunken grin as he batted the hand away from his chin. "Noooooo problem, me amigo. As long as you no killa me, we-a be fiiiiiine."
Fuuma snorted. "Aoki, you are drunk."
Aoki grinned more. "Yup. Just started to kick in. I figured, it's been fiftey damned years, Fuuma-baby. I've been Sei-chan's replacment for fiftey years, ands I've never once felt for a moment that you were going to start the holy 'final battle' any time soon, you know? So, I figured getting drunk wouldn't matter much."
Fuuma nodded. "You've got a point."
"So, you got sumthin I wanna hear?"
"Yes," said Fuuma. His voice was grave, and serious. "Aoki, you are the very wind beneath my wings."
Aoki fell over.
Kamui was gong to leave the house. He was dressed in tight tight tight leather pants he had borowed from Subaru, and was wearing a soft, silky shirt that was half buttoned. He looked damn sexy.
'I'm gong to go and pck up chicks, rah!' thought Kamui. 'No more being told I'm gay, no sir, I'm straight as an arrow!'
"Hey Kamui," said Subaru, staring at Kamui's sweet leather-clad ass, "Next time you want to get into my pants, all you have to do is ask."
Kamui, who had been horny just seconds before, walked dejectedly towards his room.
"K-kamui? What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I think I'm going to go and call Fuuma."
"WHAT????"
"You heard me. It's time to end this!"
In the bar where we had left Fuuma and Aoki, after Fuuma revived Aoki, the two started doing shots together, tryng to drink the other under the table. Since coming to Tokyo 50 years ago, Aoki had grown immune to the immidiate effects of potato vodka (Dan Quale spelling 'potatoe vodkah'), and Fuuma, since becoming the Dark Kamui, had been doing shots with 'The Morning Star' (bonus points if you know who I'm talking about, triple bonus points if you know the movie where I got that from, and even more if you know the character who says the words in reference to 'The Morning Star', and hell, a dollar if you know the actor and can recite the scene), so he wasn't going down for awhile.
But then, suddenly, Karen burst through the door. "Aoki!" she cried, a great urgency in her voice. "It's Arashi!"
Fuuma snorted. It was sexy. "So? What's the bitch done now?" asked Fuuma.
Igoring the sexy snort from Fuuma, and his comment (okay, so all the good ones were gay or taken, and Fuuma....well, he wasn't one of the ones Karen deemed 'good,' but he was definetly gay in her mind), Kaen looked at Aoki. "Aoki, she's locked herself in the champange room! It's horrible! And Sorata-"
"Fuck Sorata!" [Authorial note: Aoki SWORE? *dies*] said Aoki, finally snapping back to attention. "Doesn't she know?"
Karen looked at Aoki, then to Fuuma. Fuuma shrugged. Then Karen realized, 'shitfuckhell, what's Fuuma doing drinking with Aoki? WAIT-what's Aoki doing drinking with Fuuma???'
"Aoki-san," said Fuuma, gently, but wavering, "What's the problem?"
"THERE IS NO X IN THE CHAMPANGE ROOM!"
Fuuma was curious. Then Karen said, "But Kamui said-"
"NO!" yelled Aoki. "No matter what Kamui Shiro says, there is NO X in the Champagne Room."
Karen grabbed Aoki, and headed for the door. Fuuma drunkenly followed.
Part Seven B: No X in the Champane Room
Karen was trying to burn down the door to the Champange room, but to no use. Kamui had mind-bolted the door shut, and had trapped himself inside.
"For the love of GOD, Kamui!" yelled Aoki. "There's to be NO X IN THE GOD-DAMNED CHAMPAGNE ROOM!!!!"
"It's no use," said Nekoi. "We've been trying to tell them that all night, but to no avail. Kamui says he's not coming out until everyone acceptes he's straight, and Arashi won't leave until Sorata promises not to try and have sex with her anymore."
"Hmm," hummed Aoki. "A problem indeed. Well, Arashi we can do, but Kamui isn't really straight."
"Hah. Looks like you haven't tried to seduce him," said Subaru, wearing the usual leather. "The boy is always whimpering. You know, despite the way he reacts under Fuuma's hands, I think he's truly straight."
"You've got to be kidding! Pretty boys like that can't be straight!" said Sorata. "It's geneticaly impossible."
A voice cried out from inside the room. "Well, it's true! So, bite me Sorata! I'm straight, you're straight, the only people here who are into men are Karen, Nekoi and Subaru!"
"Wait," said Karen, "what about Arashi?"
"Oh," said Arashi's voice from behind the door, "I have to tell he truth. I find women much more stimulating."
Everyone cringed as Sorata howled into the night.
Fuuma, who had followed everyone to the manson, had decded that it was better to pass out on the front steps then find out what was going on (though not really, he was just too inebriated to move by the time he got there). Luckily, Yuuto appeared about then, and had his bondage women pick Fuuma up, and carry him back to the Chi no Ryu base of Operations.
One Week Later:
********Tokyo Morning Newspaper**********
Yesterday, someone reported seeing blue and red dragons fighting around Tokyo Tower. As residents and passerbys were assured that it was NOT another Season of Fushigi Yuugi being played out, or the newest Sailor Moon Musical, police did report many differents severed heads and bodies falling from up above.
One observer said that when the heads started to fall, strange music began to play all over the park. She said, "I didn't recognise the song at first....but once the lyrics of the song became audible, I knew right away-it was that old X-Japan song, 'Forever Love'. It was shocking, I was pretty sure that X Japan had brocken up a few years ago."
After that, it weas reported that two Japanese school boys, one Shiro Kamui and one Monou Fuuma, came floating down from the top of Tokyo Tower, each holding a severed head in their hands. Shiro was holding Monou's head, and Monou was holding Shiro's head. Once they landed, they began sobbing hysterically, and hugging the heads. Yuzihria Nekoi was reported as saying that's when the song burst out with the lines "Forever love/Forever dream."
After that, a pillar of light sucked up Shiro, and no one has seen him since.
The end.
Moral of the story: The only way to end X is hugging some pretty boy severed heads, and singing "Forever Love."
P.S.- Stay tuned for an Epiloge. It should be here....next week, or sooner. You'll like it. We promise.