Chapter 14: New Traditions
Nick and Natasha started planning an Avengers Thanksgiving as soon as October turned to November. They knew that this year, everyone would struggle a little bit more to be thankful. Nick also planned to have a dinner with his family, and he knew many of their friends would too, so they aimed for the Saturday after the actual holiday. That would allow everyone to spend the day with their families, and plenty of travel time for Thor, who expressed his eagerness for the occasion the instant they mentioned it to him.
Thinking about this occasion was somehow even more emotionally draining than planning Steve's birthday. Maybe it was because of the traditions of the season. Family togetherness. Home. Gratefulness. Things they would never have fully intact ever again. Nick was grateful for his friends and family here more than anything else in the world, but the list should've been a few names longer. It used to be longer.
"Do you want to leave empty seats at the table?" he asked Natasha.
She sighed. "I don't know. There's so many of them now."
"It might just make people sad, to look at them. We can find other ways to make sure their presence is felt."
"Yeah, I like that idea."
They scratched the empty seat idea and finalized the invite list, which was nearly identical to the one for Steve's birthday, with the exception of his high school friends, Matt, and Josiah. Tony enthusiastically agreed to host at Stark Tower, which was probably the only place among them big enough for them all to eat together. Nick joked that they should pose for a picture like the Last Supper, but then Natasha reminded him what that was actually about. "Don't tell Matt I said that," he demanded.
Natasha swore herself to silence. "Are we planning to cook for this thing, just the two of us? I may have gotten better in the kitchen, but I'm not sure my skills have improved that much."
"I was thinking we ask everyone to bring a dish. Send out a sign-up sheet or something."
"I agree. Less stress for everybody."
"Also, I have no way of knowing if a turkey is cooked without literally sticking my hand in it, and I don't think anybody wants that."
"They don't have tactile meat thermometers?"
"What's a meat thermometer?"
"Are you kidding?"
Nick had genuinely never heard of such a thing. His expression must have indicated his genuine cluelessness; Nat started laughing.
"What's so funny? Do they really make special thermometers for meat?"
"Yes, they do. How else do you know it's done?"
"My mom always just looked to see if it was pink inside."
"Interesting. Well, there's this handy little invention called a meat thermometer that tells you what temperature the inside is. That way you don't have to cut it open to check the color to know if it's done. Different types of meat need to reach different temperatures before they're done."
"Is it reliable?"
"Some more than others."
"Do you have one?"
"Yes. And I'm sure Tony does too, somewhere in that Empire State Building he calls a home."
"Can you make it accessible?"
"Yeah; do you have any spare tactile dots?"
"Always."
"We might have to break the plastic cover off the dial so you can feel where the arrow is, but I'm sure it won't be a problem."
"Those are dangerous words. Are we about to break a meat thermometer and give all our friends food poisoning from undercooked turkey?"
"Probably not. It'll be fine. If you're that concerned, maybe I should handle the meat."
"No, I've got it. This is either going to be a hell of an accomplishment or a hell of a story."
~0~
Tony's parents agreed to let him use the biggest dining room in the tower for his Friendsgiving if and only if he sat through an entire football game with Dad and the entire parade with Mom on Thanksgiving Day. It was well worth the long hours of boredom to have his second family together under one roof for the holiday. Even Carol May and Lanyon were coming, which only amplified his excitement. This was the first Avengers family gathering that they were old enough to attend.
He awoke at six in the morning to start prepping the place. Nick and Natasha showed up only an hour and a half later. Within fifteen minutes of their arrival, the kitchen was bustling with activity and what Nick called, "Chaos organized enough for a blind man to work with it." Just looking at what they had prepared had Tony's mouth watering. Instead of a typical dinnertime, they planned to instead to feast for lunch and spend the rest of the afternoon just enjoying their time together. That way, they could all be together instead of various people having to pop into the kitchen to check on this dish or the other.
As the morning drew on, more and more people joined the party, and more and more scents joined the kitchen. Bruce and Betty, still annoyingly punctual even with a five-month-old baby, brought a gorgeous green bean casserole. Wanda and Victor arrived with a massive plastic container full of little rectangular cookie things that she said were called "mandel bread" from some Yiddish word. Parker had claimed pie duty, and did not disappoint, bringing three different kinds of pie.
"How did you have time to do this?" Tony asked.
"Somebody's a good sleeper," he remarked, kissing Carol May on the head. She squealed in MJ's arms and reached out for Parker. MJ handed her off and went over to talk to Wanda and Victor. Thor had never celebrated Thanksgiving before, so he spent his first twenty minutes here trailing Natasha and Nick in the kitchen and making them explain everything. He made sure to keep Korg heeling and out from underfoot for Nick's sake.
The Rambeaus brought more New Orleans staples, much to everyone's excitement. This Thanksgiving was about to be far from traditional, and Tony wouldn't have it any other way. By the time everyone arrived, there was hardly any open counter space and even less fridge space. A dozen different aromas drifted throughout the floor, alongside the sounds of a dozen different laughs.
Natasha and Nick had set up a game for everybody to play: a set of three questions that everyone was to answer anonymously. Each person wrote their answers on a piece of paper and dropped it in a bucket. After dinner, they'd read the answers and try to guess who was who. The questions were: What one object would you bring to a deserted island? If you could invent a jellybean flavor, what would it be? And if you had a boat, what would you name it? Tony looked forward to hearing what everyone had to say.
While the various dishes took their sweet time warming, cooking, or baking, they walked about and chatted. Tony caught up with Wanda and Victor, saw the latest photos of their under-construction house, and learned about Steve Danvers' latest game design. He—and everyone else—took turns holding and playing with Carol May and Lanyon. The whole time, he kept a close eye on Bucky. The man was clearly having fun, but there was a darkness behind his eyes. They all knew this gathering lacked several members, but nobody felt it more acutely than Bucky.
When they finally sat down to eat, Tony thought he might've run out of conversation topics. Luckily, there was enough food on the table to keep him eating for an hour straight, so there might not even be that much talking, he thought with a chuckle. Natasha and Nick, after laying the turkey in the center of the table, stood back and gave a little speech. "We know grief always rears its ugly head during the holidays," Nick began. "Which is why we wanted to make sure we could all be together to hold each other up."
"I know I speak for everyone here when I say I'm thankful for the amazing community—the amazing family—that we built together," Natasha continued.
"Life can be hard, but you all make it fun," Nick concluded. "Now let's eat!"
Shuffling of chairs and clinking of utensils ensued. Every dish started somewhere around the table and began making its way around clockwise. Natasha and Nick hadn't set seating, so everyone had just filled in wherever they wanted. Carol May and Lanyon shared a play pen a few feet away from the table; MJ, Parker, Betty, and Bruce occupied the seats nearest them. To Bruce's left sat Thor, with Korg under the table at his feet, and then Monica, Maria, Steve, Kate, Natasha, Nick, Bucky, Wanda, Victor, and finally Tony.
Tony added dish after dish until his plate ran out of room. He ate slowly, both to savor the food and to participate in the conversation. Despite the hours of earlier chit chat, there was still more. Lanyon and Carol May's latest exploits. Thor and Korg's adventures in Australia and the mountains of Norway. Natasha's nursing triumphs. Nick's annoying supervisor who acted like he was doing Nick a favor every time he did the bare minimum to comply with ADA. Betty and Bruce's research, Tony's projects, MJ's stories, there was enough to carry them through dinner and dessert. Parker's pie did not disappoint.
"We won't even have to wash these dishes if we lick them all clean," Bucky remarked as he finished off the last of his slice.
"I have to disagree," Monica said.
So, they set up a dish washing assembly line. The sink was big enough for two people washing, so Bruce and Parker stood side-by-side at the sink. Bucky carried dirty dishes from the table to them, and they handed off the clean ones to Maria and Monica to dry. Tony put himself in charge of putting them away because he knew the layout of the kitchen better than anyone else, and he appointed Victor to help him.
"How about we play a game to make this less tedious?" Parker suggested. "Something simple. Anyone ever done word building before?"
"What's that?" Nat asked. She sat down and set one foot on the table. Everyone unanimously excused her and Nick from dish duty because of all the work they'd put into cooking.
"One person says a word, and the next person has to say a word that starts with the last letter. Sometimes there's a category too, but that makes it harder."
"I vote no ca-te-go-ry," Thor said immediately.
"Sure. I'll go first. The word is…" Parker paused for a moment, working a stubborn spot off a pan. "Scrub."
"Bullshit," Nick proclaimed.
"What? You don't like the game?" Victor asked.
"No, that's my word that starts with B. Bullshit."
"Isn't that two words?" Tony asked.
"I don't think so."
"It's fine," Parker said.
"Topaz," MJ interjected. "Starts with T."
"You're really gonna give someone a Z? That's tough," Betty remarked.
"Zoloft," Bruce said.
"I don't think proper nouns count," Maria said. "Parker?"
"It's just for fun; I don't see why not."
"Turtle," Wanda said. "Starts with T."
"Es are the hardest, usually," Parker said. "Any takers?"
"Eight," Victor said.
"Another T?" Monica said. "How about turkey." She gestured toward the carcass remaining of their bird.
"Yellow," Tony said. He thought of it because he was putting away a yellow plate at the moment.
"Wa-ter-me-lon!" Thor exclaimed.
"Good one," Bucky said.
"No," Steve Danvers countered. Thor looked at him, face awash with shock and hurt. "No, that's just my word. It starts with N."
"Oh, sorry."
"No, it's okay. Anybody have an O?"
"Orange," Kate offered.
"And we're back to E," Parker sighed.
"Excellent," Maria offered.
"Television."
"Number."
"Raccoon."
"New."
"Witch."
"Harpy."
"Is that spelled with a Y or an IE?"
"Y, I think."
"You."
"Umbrella."
"Atherosclerosis."
"Showoff," Nick scoffed.
"Flip."
"No, that wasn't my word, I was insulting Tony."
"Petty."
"Would you look at that, the last dish is clean," Bruce remarked. Tony burst out laughing at the sudden diffusion. The game had taken every turn that he expected and hoped it would.
"Thank you for that, Parker."
"Sure thing. It's a great road trip game. My parents taught it to me."
"Now that all the cleaning is done, how about the other game?" Nick suggested. Natasha grabbed the bucket full of slips of paper where they'd written the answers to the three questions. Everyone gathered around the now-cleared table as Natasha set the bucket in the middle.
"Do we want to take turns reading or just appoint one person to do all of them?" she asked.
"I nominate you, because you're the only one who can keep a straight face when they pick their own," Parker said.
"Okay." Natasha grabbed the first slip. "This person would bring a hammer to a deserted island—"
"Thor," Bruce blurted out.
"How did you guess that so fast?"
"Thor, you probably shouldn't have made it that obvious," Tony said.
"What good would a hammer do you on a deserted island?" MJ asked.
He shrugged. "Smash co-co-nuts, maybe."
Natasha continued, "His jellybean flavor would be Pop Tart, and his boat's name would be Naglfar."
"Of course you read that in a perfect accent," Kate scoffed. "Do you speak Norwegian too?"
"No. Should I?"
"No. Most of us know English," Thor said.
"What does Naglfar mean?" Tony asked, trying his best at the pronunciation but probably missing the mark by quite a bit.
"It's the Ship of Nails, from Norse myth."
"Sounds cool," Parker said.
"Finger nails, not construction nails," Bruce added.
"Wait, what?!"
"How do you know that?" Tony asked.
"Loki told me about it when I stayed with them that summer. Along with just about every other story about Loki. Did you know she mothered a horse? With eight legs?"
"No, and I would've liked to keep it that way," Wanda muttered.
Natasha grabbed the next piece of paper. "Duct tape, lead acetate, and the Rosalind."
"That has to be Bruce," Tony said. "Who else would choose a fucking chemical compound for a jellybean flavor."
Bruce shook his head. "Not me."
"Parker?" Betty tried.
"Not me."
"Victor?" Nick suggested.
"No."
"Wait a minute; if it's not Bruce, it has to be Betty," Tony concluded. Her participation in the guess must've been a well-played diversion.
"Yes."
"What's Rosalind mean?"
"It's for Rosalind Franklin. The real brains behind Watson's and Crick's DNA discoveries, but she wasn't credited because she's a woman."
"I love that," Natasha said. "Okay, next. Matches, caramel, Fast and Furious."
"Tony," Victor guessed.
"Nope."
"Steve," Monica said.
He shook his head. "I hate caramel."
"Is it you, Nick?" Natasha asked.
"Yeah. Matches was my second thought, but I thought it would be too obvious if I said I was bringing my white cane."
"Yeah, that would've been a bit of a giveaway."
"Fast and Furious? Really?" Bucky questioned. "You went with a pun?"
"Yeah. What about it?"
"Nothing, nothing." He smirked. Tony wasn't sure he even wanted to know what Bucky named his boat.
"Next is a jacket, pineapple, and the Photon."
Monica's eyes widened and she visibly clamped her mouth shut. Clearly, Tony wasn't the only one to pick up on those cues. "Is it you?" Kate asked. Monica shook her head.
"It's Maria," Tony said.
"Yeah. Photons are fast. I thought it sounded cool."
"It does."
Natasha pulled the next paper. "Matches…milk, and Bow to Bow."
"A milk flavored jelly bean?"
"That's what it says."
"I'm gonna guess Kate," MJ said.
"No."
"You didn't write bow to bow?"
"No, I swear."
"Bruce, is it you?" Bucky asked. He shook his head.
"It's Wanda," Victor cut in. "The bow is the front of a boat. Bow to bow…head to head."
She smiled up at him. "Yeah, you figured it out." Victor's returning grin lit up the entire table.
"That's so sweet," Parker said. "Who's next?"
"This person would bring a rope, their flavor would be fudge, and their boat Even Keeled."
"That has to be you, Nat," Bucky said. She denied it.
"Is it Tony?" Betty asked.
"No."
"I have no idea who this could be," Nat admitted. "Any other guesses?" A few more names got thrown around, but none of them were correct.
"It's me," Bruce fessed up.
"Fudge jelly beans? Don't they make those already?"
"I've seen chocolate, but never fudge."
"What's the difference?" Steve asked.
"The texture."
"But it's a jelly bean. It would have jelly bean texture."
"We didn't attack anybody else's flavor choices, why me?"
"Moving on," Natasha announced. "Bow and arrow."
"That's Kate," Parker said.
Natasha looked at Kate. "You could not have made that more obvious."
"What? It's what I would bring! Super useful. You can shoot fish, make a bowdrill to start a fire, shoot flaming arrows to the sky as distress signals."
"Technically the questions said one object so you can either bring the bow or the arrows," MJ pointed out.
"Oh shut up. I choose the bow then. Read my other answers."
"Pizza flavored jelly beans, and the boat name would be Pawn, Rook, and Knight. Why that?"
"Chess pieces. Like Bishop."
"Oh cool. Next is…a lighter, plum flavored jelly beans, and…" she trailed off before continuing, "The Wet Dream."
The entire table burst out laughing. "That has to be Tony," Parker said.
"It wasn't me!" Tony appreciated the name, but he wasn't lewd enough to come up with it on the spot when he filled out his answers.
"Was it Thor?" Betty asked.
"No, he's already gone."
"MJ?"
She shook her head insistently.
"It's the plum part that's a dead giveaway," Nick said. "Bucky, that's your chemo craving."
"Yeah, it's me. But that craving never went away completely."
"You would name your boat…the Wet Dream?" Natasha asked incredulously.
"Probably not. But Josiah sent me a pic of a boat that said that not too long ago and it was on my mind."
"It's interesting; a bunch of people have said matches, but you're the first to say lighter," Steve remarked.
"Lighter's easier to work with one hand."
"Oh, that makes sense."
"Okay, next one. This one says…knife, peanut butter, the Sea Spider."
"That's Parker," Tony said immediately.
"Nope. But that's a cool boat name."
"Is it you, Tony?" Maria asked.
"No."
"It's Natasha, the deceitful little shit," Nick said.
"How am I being deceitful?"
"You read your own paper without so much as a pause."
"That's why I was picked me to do this. But yeah, it's mine."
"Peanut butter jelly beans? I don't know how I feel about that," Tony said. "Some flavors just don't belong in candy."
"I think it would be worth a try. Anyway, here's the next one: GameBoy, pineapple, the King of Red Lions."
"Steve," Monica blurted out immediately.
"Hey! You should've let them guess."
"I knew it was you. You made it obvious."
"How's a GameBoy going to help you survive?" Maria asked.
"I thought the premise of the question was the one item you'd use to stave off boredom until you died on the deserted island. I didn't know it was a survival question."
"Why the King of Red Lions?" Tony asked.
"It's a talking sailboat from Legend of Zelda."
"A talking sailboat?"
"Yeah."
"Cool."
Natasha moved on. "This person would bring…a car? Pineapple flavor, and the Sword in the Sea."
"Wait—a car? What good does that do on an island?" Nick asked.
"I guess whoever picked it will explain when they're revealed."
"And what is it with the pineapple jelly beans? That's the third person to pick that," Kate noted.
"If the pattern holds true, that's Monica's answers," Parker said.
"Yeah."
"Please explain the car."
"Think about it! There's so much you can use it for. It's already a shelter, the battery could help start a fire—so could the gasoline, and burning the tires would make a great smoke signal. So could the mirrors."
"She makes an excellent point," Tony said.
"And the pineapple jelly beans was something Carol used to complain about. All the variety packs came with pina colada, but never just pineapple," Maria explained.
Victor pulled out his phone, looked something up, and handed it to Maria. "They do make crushed pineapple flavor."
"Would you look at that, they do exist. Carol would've loved to try them."
"Alright, there's only four left. Next is…a box of scraps, whiskey, and Edith."
"A box of scraps is more than one thing!" Nick protested.
"Whatever. Any guesses?"
"Tony," Parker said without hesitation. "The whiskey was a dead giveaway."
"Yeah, it was me. But there's so much you can do with a box of scraps. I'm sure I could survive a deserted island."
"Why Edith for the boat?"
Tony shrugged. "It sounds like an old lady name. Everyone calls boats she."
Natasha grabbed another slip, leaving only two behind in the bucket. "Swiss army knife, red licorice, the William II."
Parker blushed bright red. "That's MJ," Wanda declared.
MJ elbowed Parker in the side. "You gave it away, loser."
"Sorry."
"What's the significance of William II?"
"The first William was Anne Bonny's ship. Famous pirate."
"Don't they have licorice flavor already?" Bruce asked.
"It's always black licorice. I want red."
"How would you tell it apart from red apple? Or cherry?" Bucky asked.
"I don't know. That wasn't part of the question."
"Fair enough."
"Next. Knife, flavorless jelly bean, and the HMS Turing."
"That has to be Victor," Tony said. Nobody else would've put HMS in their ship's title. Plus, he knew who Alan Turing was and he was exactly the kind of person Victor would name a boat after.
"Yes, that's mine."
"A flavorless jelly bean?" Monica questioned.
"I've always wondered what jelly beans taste like without added flavors."
"Interesting," Nick noted.
"Well, there's only one left, so everyone already knows whose it is," Parker said. "You don't have to read it."
"I'm still reading it," Natasha insisted. "First aid kit—that's so Weaver of you, rainbow flavor—also very Weaver—and…Mary and Richard. Aww, that's so sweet."
"What do you mean rainbow is very Weaver? Is that because my parents are gay?"
"No, I meant because you're zealous and want to cram as much enjoyment into life as possible. Sorry if it came across wrong."
"No, it's okay. You're not wrong."
"That was so much fun!" Wanda said.
"We should do this every year," Bucky added. "This whole thing."
Everybody agreed. They also agreed to second helpings of pie.
This is based on a game my family plays every year at Thanksgiving. It's always a good time.